1-July-2016
Lions District 202 L
Chartwell Lions Buzz
PO Box 12115 Chartwell Hamilton
President Paul’s Pen
G'Day Fellow Lions,
Executive:
President: Paul Henry
Ph. 853 7372
Secretary: Iris Cousins
Ph. 855 6474
Editor: Mike Cousins
Ph. 855 6474
Well, the Hand Over Dinner Meeting has come and gone
and a new Lion's year has begun. Thank you to all who
attended the dinner meeting and I hope that you all enjoyed it as much as I did. There was a very good turnout and Mike Hanaray did a
great job of inducting the new officers to the Board. The theme was an African one
and each one of the Board members was given an African Animal name. The Board
is a strong one and one that should ensure that we have a great 2016/17 Lion's year.
The board has had it's first meeting for the year on 28th June 2016 where we spent
some time planning the year to come. Iris has sent out an e-mail with the names of
the Committee Chairs and the members of each committee. We will continue to
hold meetings in the comfort of our homes and the Committee Chairs will make contact with their members regarding the days on which you will meet. The Committee
recommendations will be sent to the Board and the resolutions passed will be disseminated back to each member of each Committee by the secretary. Therefore
each member of each committee will know what the other committee is doing at
any particular time. I have spoken to some senior Lion's members who have suggested that somewhere during our dinner meeting I could allocate a short time to summarising the various committees activities. I have taken this on board and will trial it
for a few dinner meetings and see if it is helpful in keeping everyone informed. This
will be strictly an information dissemination exercise and not a rehash of decisions
already taken. Thank you to Sam and Lucie who will continue to organise the BBQ's
on Saturday's and thanks to all the members who have given of their valuable time
in running the BBQ's. Lucie will continue to run the monthly pub get-together's. This
is a great opportunity to meet your fellow Lions socially and to get to know them
better - I would encourage you all to make an effort to attend if you are in town on
these evenings.
My 3 main aims this year are:
1). To grow our club - the youth are our life blood and to neglect this very important
issue will result in our club and other Lion's clubs simply limping off into obscurity.
We need younger members and to be prepared to groom them and to allow them
to take over and to take our great club forward into the future.
2). To get 2 new very good projects up and running in this Lions years - (in addition
to the Magic Show) - to fill up our pantry to allow us to distribute the funds appropriately.
3). To have more social events. Hopefully no one has developed
web feet with all this rain - however only 2 more months of winter
and then we are into spring. Wishing you all a great Lion's year.
With my best wishes,
Paul Henry
http://www.lionsclubs.org.nz/Clubs/202L/Zone-1/Hamilton-Chartwell
Inside this issue:
Top Table
2
Club News
3
Lions Night Out
4
Projects
5-6
Change Over
7-8
Almoner
9
Keep your mind
active
10
Contact
11
District News
12
International
13
Training
14
Twisted Tales
15
12th July Tea Meeting
SOCIAL HOUR: 6PM-6.40PM
GREETERS:
Colleen Porteus & Alma Tocker
CALL TO ORDER: 6.45PM
CHAIRMAN:
Paul Henry
INVOCATION:
Noel Jellyman
TAIL TWISTER:
Mike & John
THOUGHT FOR THE MONTH:
Ken Jones
INTRODUCTION OF SPEAKER:
Verena Vetsch
GUEST SPEAKER:
To be advised later
VOTE OF THANKS:
Gwyn Lobb
STAR OF THE MONTH:
Pat & Norm Thomson
RAFFLE
If members are UNABLE to attend or are bringing a guest please phone Owen Henderson on 8545822. Please call Owen by Sunday Night 10th July 2016
Also please contact President Paul on 8537372 if you are unable to undertake your allocated duty
Will members please place their orders when paying the treasurer as soon as you arrive.
STAR OF THE MONTH
Norm & Patricia Thomson (June)
Chartwell Lions Buzz
Page 3
Date
Event
Location
10th July
Something Glorious
Hamilton Civic Choir
St Peters Cathedral
Tickets Tel 07 855
0762
21th July
Pub Night
Foundation at the
Base Te Rapa
29th July
Alzheimer's
Collection
Westfield
Chartwell
Lions
Service
Trevor Scott— 1/7/1998 (28 Years)
Margaret Simmons— 1/7/1996 (20 Years)
July Birthday Wishes
02nd
13th
17th
Mike Cousins
Richard Flint
Margaret Jones
Points to Ponder
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
If you can't drink and drive, why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor, and why do bars have parking lots?
Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?
Why is it called a TV "set" when you only get one?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
When you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?
Rolling Calendar of
Events
Club News
Bar Snacks
Brunch (all day)
Salads
Pizzas
Burgers & Sandwiches
Pasta
Mains
On the Side
Wine
Beer & Cider
Spirits
Soft Drinks
Tea & Coffee
Cocktails
Shooters
Contact Lucie by Wednesday 20/7 if you will be attending
07 854 9339
[email protected]
PROJECTS & PICTURES
Up Coming Projects
Discovery Park Soccer BBQ
Please contact Lucie if you are able to help with the Soccer BBQ’s
HEALTH ISSUES ?
Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
Do you suffer from shyness?
Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Cabernet Sauvignon.
Cabernet Sauvignon is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. It can help ease
you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything.
You will notice the benefits of Cabernet Sauvignon almost immediately and, with a regimen of regular doses, you can overcome
any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live.
Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding
and start living.
Cabernet Sauvignon may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use it. However, women
who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.
Side effects may include:
Dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of money, loss of virginity, delusions of
grandeur, table dancing, headache, dehydration, dry mouth, and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night rounds of Strip Poker, Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister.
Warnings:
The consumption of Cabernet Sauvignon may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
The consumption of Cabernet Sauvignon may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
The consumption of Cabernet Sauvignon may cause you to think you can sing.
The consumption of Cabernet Sauvignon may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than
most people.
Please feel free to share this important information with as many people as you feel may benefit!
Now just imagine what you could achieve with a good Shiraz or Merlot..
LIFE IS A CABERNET OLD CHUM!
Legacy Project
Some Ideas already suggested by Chartwell Lions are:
To build another BBQ at either the Lake or Gardens.
To include a Time Capsule as part of the BBQ.
Put in a water fountain at the Soccer fields to provide
fresh clean water for the children.
Time is getting short, We have set aside $15,000.00 for this
project and will also ask the “District Banking Trust” and
Lloyd Morgan Trust for top up funds if the total cost is higher.
Remember Projects must be complete and Dedicated by June
30, 2018
During July the three committees will discuss ideas for the Centennial Legacy Project.
The properly formulated suggestions will be discussed at the next board meeting
where a decision will be taken on which one to run with.
At the June Board meeting it was suggested that we can also approach the Zone with
the idea of sharing the project amongst the clubs in our zone, however it was also
pointed out that it may be better to approach the other clubs in Hamilton to make
the project “Hamilton based” only.
Suggested proposal format:
Project (Give a brief description)
Estimated cost: $
Resources required (How many people for how long)
Expected life of project
Project maintenance cost and resource over time
Community Benefit
Bring your suggestions to your individual committee meetings this month where they
can be shared and discussed. You can also approach members from other committees before your meetings to drum up support for your proposal.
President Kerry and Trish with President elect Paul
and Dianne Henry and PDG Mike Hanaray just before
the the festivities began.
President Kerry presenting Lion Brian with his 25 Year
Service Medal. Well done Brian and Ruth
David Dunstan receives his Membership certificate sponsored
by Brian Elsmore.
Jimmy Hammersley, a very proud Lion Tamer. The keeper of the effects of the pride.
Tail Twister Mike watching over the pride for indiscretions.,
Treasurer Trevor with an elephants memory will keep the pride
financially sound and Secretary Iris the wise old owl will keep
the records of the pride when she is awake.
The heavyweights hippo’s
Owen and Varena will need
their wits about them dealing with the Youth & Welfare
portfolio, Wildebeest Norm
will grab a project and fight
through to a successful conclusion Monkey Peter will
care for the pride, keeping
them enthralled with stories
from interesting individual's
and making sure that everyone is well fed.
Our slightly blurry eyed leader and his
Lioness at the evenings conclusion,
returning to his lair from where he will
deliberate the future path of his
mighty pride.
Owen reports his upgrade to Windows 10 wasn't a success. I could have told him that “When you
get older you want less windows in your life, More means too much bright light”. Wishing you and
your computer a successful return to health.
It was great to see Brian Ivy and David Dunstan at our changeover night. You are both
looking so well.
Phone call from Sally
Sally from Hukanui Rd “Phone is out of order, it has been reported to the call centre in the
Philippine's “
Test your knowledge of New Zealand. Match up the descriptions with the Location. One has been done
for you as an example. See if you qualify to be an “Egg Head”
Number Location
1 Kerikeri
2 Dargaville
Answer
3 Pukekohe
4 Huntly
5 Ngaruawahia
6 Whangamata
7 Paeroa
8 Katikati
9 Te Puke
Number Description
A1
Daffodil capital (they had to think of something!)
A2
Mural capital (interesting wall paintings of bird gardens)
Yellow Fin Tuna/Kiwi/Sunshine capital (apparently you can
A3
hear kiwi birds at night in the town!)
A4
Gumboot capital (seriously)
Energy capital (important nearby natural gas and oil fields
A5
also good surfing!)
A6
Chardonnay/Clapital (STD) capital
A7
Well known for its horticulture and farmer's market
A8
Trout Fishing capital (& gateway to National Park)
A9
Murder capital (at least historically)
15 Kawerau
16 Tokoroa
17 Taupo
18 Whangaroa
A15
A16
A17
A18
Kiwifruit capital of the world! (good place for backpackers
to find a summer job!)
situated at the junction of the Waikato and Waipa Rivers
Viking capital (founded by Scandinavian settlers)
Newsprint and Paper capital
Kiwiana capital (Kiwi culture)
Motorsport capital (large immigrant Indian population lots
of vegetable growing)
Surf capital (compare Whangamata)
Pinot Noir capital (where Wellington’s wealthy like to go)
Army town (attention foreign intelligence)
19 Te Awamutu
A19
Events Centre (also nice university town! great gardens)
20 Gisborne
A20
Town of Trees & Champions’ (referring to the horse industry based there)
21 Tirau
A21
Ugliest Town/’Crapital’ (centre of coal industry; c’mon it’s
boring just to see the beautiful side of NZ!)
22 Te Kuiti
23 Otorohanga
24 Inglewood
25 New Plymouth
26 Hastings
A22
A23
A24
A25
A26
Youth Violence/future Cycling & Walking capital (and lots
of horticulture – summer backpacking jobs!)
Trout Fishing capital (but famous enough already!)
Carrot capital (and winter ski resort)
Refreshing Lemon drink
James Rolleston, who starred in the movie Boy, lives here
27 Napier
28 Ohakune
29 Waiouru
30 Taihape
31 Turangi
A27
A28
A29
A30
A31
Marlin capital (also known through the film ‘the Whale
Rider’)
Kumara capital
Surfing capital (summer resort town)
Wine & Fruit capital/Art Deco capital
Shearing Capital of the World
32 Dannevirke
A32
Suicide capital (according to comedian John Cleese; residents weren’t pleased about this)
33 Palmerston North
A33
Corrugated iron, in particular the giant sheepdog and the
enormous sheep.
A34
A35
Rose capital (and home of famous bands Split Enz and
Crowded House)
Timber Town (Maori carving totem poles forestry centre)
10 Hamilton
11 Cambridge
12 Raglan
13 Opotiki
14 Whakatane
34 Carterton
35 Martinborough
A19
A10
A11
A12
A13
A14
The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways , but narrower
viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more
conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet
more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.
We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late,
get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.
We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.
We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the
moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner
space. We've done larger things, but not better things.
We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but
learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold
more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.
These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships.
These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology
can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete...
Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.
Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave
your side.
Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it
doesn't cost a cent.
Remember, to say, 'I love you' to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. An embrace will mend hurt
when it comes from deep inside of you.
Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.
Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.
AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
George Carlin - comedian of the 70's and 80's
The Editor
Page 12
Lions District 202 L
The D.G’s Briefcase
Fellow Lions. Our International
President Bob Corlew has chosen
“New Mountains to Climb” as our
2016-2017 international theme.
We must connect With Communities.
Providing needed service builds
lasting bonds and allows Lions clubs
to genuinely connect with communities. Every community, large or
small, presents an opportunity for a
Centennial Legacy Project. Additional
information about Centennial Legacy
Projects is available on the Lions100.org Website.
As we celebrate 100 years of Lions
service, we honour our past and
embrace our present. But it is our
future for which we must plan. If
we are to ascend our next mountain, we must lay out a trail in front
of us, marking our trail for future
generations of Lions who follow
and preserve our tradition of service.
Every member of our team matters
and each make an impact. We must
encourage others to join us. Every
new member will impact the lives of
at least 30 people through service,
which means for every 1,000 members, who join, we can impact the
lives of 30,000 people. This is why we
need to expand our ranks - we must
invite for impact.
Reaching the top of a mountain is
not the end of a journey; it is the
beginning of another. That is our
strength. We must continue to
assess our service initiatives and
programs to ensure we all share a
vision where service drives the
purpose of our organisation. We
must continue to lead through service, enhancing our position as the
global leader in humanitarian service.
Our goal during our Centennial celebration is for every club to induct a
minimum of three new members
each year, and every district to start
at least one new club.
Lions impact the well-being of
communities in many ways, including our four primary areas of ser-
I look forward to a great year, and
hope to catch up with you all.
Stu Gray
As at 30 June 2016 total Lions membership in New
Zealand and the Islands
of the South Pacific was 10,080 in 373 Clubs.
Climbing a mountain represents
something that is difficult and arduous and takes a maximum effort
to accomplish. But it is only by
climbing those mountains that we
can excel. Each mountain represents a new challenge, a new opportunity. As our world continues
to change, each of us faces new
challenges and new opportunities
to serve and each can be viewed as
a mountain. Climbing these mountains provides a chance for Lions to
make the world better.
vice: protecting our environment,
enhancing the lives of our youth,
working to minimise hunger and
providing vision related service. Lions
continue to fulfil our motto, “We
Serve”, embracing new opportunities
to serve. No mountain is ever too
high.
Kathy Singleton recently emailed Lions Clubs International. When she was
a first-grader in Springfield, Missouri, the Lions club bought her first pair of
glasses. “I still remember the joy I felt when I was able to distinguish that
trees had individual leaves. It excited my heart to learn to see the world in
its infinite beauty,” she eloquently wrote us. “I pray y’all continue blessing
many other kids like y’all did me.”
Yes, Ms. Singleton, for the next 100 years, we will keep on helping children
as well as adults as we have for the past century. In our Centennial year,
we want to honor and remember the past as well as move our great Association forward.
During our long history Lions not only reached out to individuals but also
often impacted entire communities. After an earthquake and tsunami devastated Afognak, Alaska, in 1964, Lions built a new town for residents. Five
years earlier in the tinder-dry cattle country of Texas, their town regularly
threatened by prairie fires, Leakey Lions started a fire brigade including a
fire truck. Long ago in 1925, alarmed by the inadequacy of schools, York
Lions in Pennsylvania began a well-stocked circulating library. The pages of
the LION from the last century are filled with tens of thousands of such examples of life-changing and often life-preserving service.
Our Centennial service goal is to serve at least 100 million people by June
2018. We are on pace to shatter that goal. Please have your club “join the
party.” Celebrate the Centennial in other ways, too, by inviting family and
friends to serve with you and by planning a Legacy Project in your community. Find out how to participate at Lions100.org.
I am honored to serve as your Centennial president. I hope you are just as
thrilled to be a Lion at this special moment in our grand history. The service
we do today will echo down the decades as we invariably strengthen our
Association and leave Lions Clubs in better shape than ever for generations
to come.
Chancellor Bob Corlew
Lions Clubs International President
Lions International
Club Leadership Training
During this coming year, the training page will cover the following topics
Club President, Secretary, Treasurer, Membership, 1St Vice President, Immediate Past President, General Board Positions, Lion Tamer & Tail Twister. The operation of the Charitable
Trust will also be covered. Hopefully this will provide the motivation for our members to take
on the various positions in coming years as you will have a clearer understanding of the
different roles. Lions who have held these positions will be asked to provide input.
Training
How come wrong numbers are never
busy
If you wear an antennae to a wedding,
would the reception be better?
If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell
him he has the right to remain silent?
What should you do if you see an endangered animal eating an endangered
plant?
Q: Mary’s father has 5 daughters – Nana,
Nene, Nini, Nono. What is the fifth daughters name?
A: If you answered Nunu, you are wrong.
It’s Mary!
Q: Why is the longest human nose on
record only eleven inches long?
A: Because if it was twelve inches it would
be a foot.
Spare a thought for the guy who told his wife that he was going on a business trip to China on Malaysian flight MH 370
and now can't leave his girlfriend's flat!
Editors Blog.
One year down and one to go.
Please continue to submit Articles and Jokes, without which I
will be hard pressed to produce this Bulletin.
Please remember to keep the content above the belt at all
times as the bulletin gets sent to external parties as well.
Twisted Tales