Survival Guide And a survival guide. Just in case you get lost and

ShAPPing the Odds:
develop your own business
31th January– 11th February
So… WHERE THE HELL ARE
WE??
r
a
can
l
s
i
y
s
d
an
LAS PALMAS
gr an can ar ia
2
LAS PALMAS
ABOUT SPAIN…
TORTILLA TOROS OOOLE OOOLE
A guide to Spain
GENERAL GEOGRAPHY
 It’s a parliamentary monarchy
(like UK, but not as classy as
them).
 It
has
17
autonomous
communities. One of them is
Balearic Islands, and they have
more Germans than Spaniards.
 Another one is Canary Islands.
They situate us near the
peninsula in the maps, inside a
box, but we are almost
Africans. We have one hour
less, lol, we are a bit retarded...
SPANISH INQUISITION
CENSOR THIS COMMENT!
 Spain has two autonomous
cities in Africa called Ceuta and
Melilla, but nobody ever
remembers.
3
LAS PALMAS
FOOD
If we have something good, that’s food :)
PAELLA
TORTILLA
JAMÓN SERRANO
SPANISH HISTORY
pfff… you have no idea how long our history is, so we will tell you
just some important moments
 First we were Iberians.
 Then everybody invaded us.
 SPAINSH INQUISITION STRIKE AGAIN!
 But then we invaded all Europe
and part of Asia, and then
Christopher Columbus discovered
America, but he thought it was
India. Really Chris, reeeally?
 Out fleet was called the “Invincible
fleet”, it has 133 ships, fuck yeah!
 WORLD WARS?? What are you
talking about?
 So invincible that the fleet fought
Brits and it lost… wait… what??
 We had our own Civil War, and
almost all our movies are about it.
 And the winner was a little tiny man
called Francisco Franco, also known
as Paco.
 So we became a dictatorship during
40 years ¬¬
 Anyway, we invaded it too.
 And then we invaded THE WHOLE
WORLD.
 Then he died and Spain became a
“democracy”.
 WE WERE A FREAKING EMPIRE.
 But then we lost everything and
we were like oh fuck!
If this Spanish
guy (don’t trust
Italians, he was
Spanish) didn’t
exist, Americans
would still be like
Pocahontas.
You’re welcome
A picture which illustrates that
naming things is not our forte
 Napoleon told us once he was gonna
invade Portugal, and suddenly his
bro was our king… wtf happened?
TRUST NO FRENCH!
 But we kicked Bonaparte bros’ asses.
We were badass.
Since then we
have a king,
Juan Carlos I of
Borbón.
You can call
him JuanKa.
 Don’t worry if you don’t understand
him when he talks, we don’t
understand him either.
 And since 2005 same sex marriage is
allowed .
4
LAS PALMAS
5
Fast facts! (Now for real)







LAS PALMAS
Area: around 5000 km2.
Population: around 47 million.
Capital city: Madrid.
Currency: Euro (€)
Time zone (mainland): UTC + 2
Time zone (Canary Islands): UTC + 1
Electricity: European standard 220-240 V AC 50 Hz –Two in
socket.
GRAN CANARIA
Serious facts ^^
 It’s situated in the Atlantic Ocean, 1.050 km away from
mainland Spain, and 115 km from Africa.
 Its population is around 838,397 people (2010).
 Las Palmas of Gran Canaria is the capital city of the island
of Gran Canaria, in the province of Las Palmas. It has a
population of 381,123, making it the largest city in the 7
islands.
 Economy: Tourism (70% of the Canarian income),
Agriculture (mainly bananas plátanos & tomatoes) and a bit
of Manufacturing.
6
Curiosities about the Canary Islands
LAS PALMAS
 We have many weird words which the rest of Spain doesn’t
understand…
 Our ancestors, the Canary aboriginals, were called
Guanches.
 In some of the Canary Islands they communicate by
whistling.
 Arehucas Distilleries SA, in Arucas (Gran Canaria) is the
largest and oldest rum factory and cellar in Europe. ;)
 Christopher Columbus was here in his way to discover
America!
 The islands have volcanic origin.
 You can find cones, lava fields, craters, cliffs, and many
caves and underground galleries, including one which is
among the longest in the world at 6 km in length, as well as
one of the ten longest volcanic tubes in the world, with a
length of almost 20 km.
 Mount Teide, in Tenerife, is the highest peak in Spain, with
3,718 m. It is the third biggest volcano on earth, measured
from its base.
7
LAS PALMAS
PRICES
Bus ticket in the city
Bottle of water 0,5L in a
bar
Coke in a bar
Bread
Sandwich
Beer in a bar
Pack of 12 condoms
Pizza
1,40€
0,60€
1€
0.40€
2.50€
1.20-2€
7€
7€
Try not to drool…
Awesome things you’ll only find here:
 La Playa de las Canteras, our beautiful urban beach :)
 Huge dune beaches: (Maspalomas Beach)
8
LAS PALMAS
 Plenty of other beaches, with golden sand, black sand,
stones, crowded, desserted, nudist…
 Papas arrugadas with mojo, rum with honey, goat cheese
(with worldwide awards!), Tropical beer, strawberry Clipper
drink, yummy dotted plátanos... are just a few of the
delicatessen you can enjoy here!
9
 The natural swimming pools in the north.
LAS PALMAS
 Wild and rough transition between forest and sand.
 Beautiful mountain landscapes.
 The worldwide famous generosity and kindness of the island
people!
10
WEATHER
LAS PALMAS
Our awesome islands have…
 Stable temperatures with an annual average of 21ºC
(71.6ºF).
 3,000 hours of sunlight a year (it is the part of Europe with
most hours of daylight!!).
The average weather for July is the following:
11
You can make sure the weather for
those days here:
LAS PALMAS
http://www.eltiempo.es/las-palmas-de-gran-canaria.html
HEALTH AND EMERGENCIES
Here are some useful numbers in case of emergency:




Police: 091
Red cross: +34 902-222-292
Firefighter brigade: 080
Tourism committee: +34 928-219-600
KEEP KALM AND CALL 112
Eurpean Union Sanitary card
If you come from a country which
belongs to the EU, you only need to
present this card to have medical care
free of charge and a partial refund of
the medicine costs.
12
If you are not a European Union citizen, you can check if your
country has signed any agreement for medical care with Spain.
You can find out this by visiting your country Social Security
webpage or office building.
LAS PALMAS
WATER FROM THE TAP IS NOT
:
DRINKABLE!!! O
GETTING HERE
1. Plane
2. Unless you’re a truly old salt, we will suppose you’re at
the airport.
3. Go up to the 1st floor and out.
4. Catch bus 60 Las Palmas – Aeropuerto. It will cost 2.60€.
5. Contact us once you get in the bus.
This bus will take you to San Telmo Station in about 20-25
minutes. We will be waiting there for you 
13
LAS PALMAS
14
LAS PALMAS
WHAT TO BRING
Be sure not to forget any of these!
















Travel and medical insurance.
National identity card/Passport.
Visa if required.
Pocket money (still Euros).
Medicine (something specific that you have to take
and you aren’t sure you will find here).
International Student Identity Card (ISIC) or your
university student card.
Camera, charger & USB (we might want to have as
soon as possible all the pics you’re naked in).
We strongly recommend to bring your laptop and
mouse!!
Bath towel and personal hygiene stuff.
Pyjama, unless you want to sleep with the MO.
Comfortable shoes and clothes in case we walk
around.
Swimsuit, towel, flip-flops, sunscreen.
Typical food, drink and flag from your country for
International Evening.
This Survival Guide.
Spare smiles and backup motivation.
Your BEST spirit.
15
*SCHEDULE*
LAS PALMAS
16
SPANISH LESSON
Hello!/Hi!
How are you?
Yes/No
Nice to meet you
Where’s the bathroom?
How much is it?
Do you speak English?
Sorry, I don’t speak Spanish
Thank you
You’re welcome
What time is it?
Shall we dance?
One beer, please
Not with you, freak!
I love you!
Do you have condoms?
You looked prettier last night
It’s very cool!
If you want me to do that, I’ll
need more alcohol.
Bus
Let’s have a “good” time
Can’t hear you, come closer
Is it me, or is it hot in here?
I am a professional surfer
Put me some rum
This is a bit weird…
WTF!!
Work hard, party harder
LAS PALMAS
¡Hola!
¿Cómo estás?
Sí/No
Encantado de conocerte
¿Dónde está el baño?
¿Cuánto es?
¿Hablas inglés?
Lo siento, no hablo español
Gracias
De nada
¿Qué hora es?
¿Bailamos?
Una cerveza, por favor
¡Contigo no, bicho!
¡Te quiero!
¿Tienes condones?
Anoche eras más guapa
¡Mola fleje!
Si quieres que haga eso
necesito más alcohol.
Guagua
Vamos a pasar un buen rato
No te oigo, acércate
¿Soy yo o aquí hace calor?
Soy surfero profesional ;)
Échame un ron
Esto es un poco trambóliko
¿¡PERO QUÉ COÑO!?
Work hard, party HARDER
17
LAS PALMAS
CONTACTS
President:
MARTA HERNÁNDEZ
LLADÓ
[email protected]
+34 680 557 277
18