Addressing Religious Conflicts in Adolescents Who

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Professional Psychology: Research and Practice
2005, Vol. 36, No. 5, 530 –536
Copyright 2005 by the American Psychological Association
0735-7028/05/$12.00 DOI: 10.1037/0735-7028.36.5.530
Addressing Religious Conflicts in Adolescents Who Experience Sexual
Identity Confusion
Mark A. Yarhouse
Erica S. N. Tan
Regent University
Eden Counseling Center
How ought psychologists to respond to adolescents who experience sexual identity confusion? Does it
make a difference if teens report religious conflicts or strain with respect to their experiences of same-sex
attraction, behavior, or identity? This article considers adolescents who experience same-sex attraction
and religious conflicts and offers recommendations to psychologists who provide services to these
adolescents. The 3 primary goals of this article are to (a) clarify the religious and sexual-identity
developmental contexts in which some adolescents find themselves experiencing same-sex attraction, (b)
identify some of the religious conflicts that may occur for adolescents, and (c) offer suggestions for
addressing religious conflicts faced by adolescents who experience same-sex attraction.
Keywords: sexual identity, adolescent sexuality, gay and lesbian issues, religious conflicts
crisis), and (d) identity achievement (the crisis is resolved and the
young person is committed to an identity).
Adolescents who experience same-sex attraction face a number
of challenges, particularly if they also share beliefs and values held
by traditional religious communities. The challenges these adolescents face may be considered with reference to the psychosocial
task of identity formation. The relevant construct in this discussion
is sexual identity, and for our purposes, we want to look at how
religious identity may interact with sexual identity.
How ought psychologists to respond to adolescents who experience sexual identity confusion? How might psychologists respond to adolescents if they come from a religious background or
if they report religious conflict in light of feelings of same-sex
attraction? The purposes of this article are to consider the experiences of religious adolescents who experience sexual identity
confusion and to provide practical suggestions to psychologists
who work with these young people.
Religious and Sexual Identity in Developmental Context
Sexual Identity Development
Adolescence is a time of significant physical, cognitive, and
social development. It is this latter aspect of development, social
development, that is foundational to an understanding of sexual
and religious identity in adolescence. Erik Erikson (1963) identified role identity versus role confusion as the key psychosocial
developmental task of adolescence. Marcia (1966) expanded on
Erikson’s views and offered four “identity statuses” related to an
identity crisis or identity commitment: identity diffusion (no crisis
and not committed to an identity), (b) identity foreclosure (commitment to an identity, not through crisis but by the suggestion of
others), (c) identity moratorium (exploring options following a
Sexual identity refers to how young people think about themselves and communicate their identity to others. For example, gay,
lesbian, straight, and bi are all words that express something about
one’s sexual preferences. Self-labeling may be influenced by a
number of factors, including sexual attractions to one or the other
sex or to both sexes, biological sex as male or female, gender
identity (how masculine or feminine one feels in light of societal
standards), moral evaluative framework (one’s beliefs and values
about sexual behavior—an orienting system, e.g., often informed
by religion), and behavior (what one does or intends to do with
one’s sexual attractions) (Althof, 2000; Shively & DeCecco, 1977;
Yarhouse, 2001). Various models of sexual identity development
reflect efforts to understand milestone events in the attainment of
sexual identity (e.g., Cass, 1979; Chan, 1989; Fox, 1995; McCarn
& Fassinger, 1996; Troiden, 1989).
Sexual orientation refers to what some experts believe is a more
stable, enduring reflection of a person’s sexual attraction to the
same sex, the opposite sex, or both sexes. What we think of as
orientation may be established earlier, whereas identity appears to
develop over time. However, even this distinction—that orientation is established early and is enduring whereas identity is fluid—
may be somewhat artificial. There appears to be a range of experiences of orientation and identity, and there may be greater
fluidity than is often supposed (e.g., Diamond, 2003).
Adolescence appears to be a critical time with respect to sexual
identity, and sexual behavior can play an important role in con-
MARK A. YARHOUSE, PsyD, is a licensed clinical psychologist who earned
his doctorate from Wheaton College. He is associate professor of psychology at Regent University, where he also directs the Institute for the Study
of Sexual Identity. His areas of interest include sexual identity, professional ethics, marriage and family therapy, and the psychology of religion.
ERICA S. N. TAN, PsyD, is a postdoctoral resident at Eden Counseling
Center in Virginia Beach, VA. She earned her doctorate in clinical psychology from Regent University. Her areas of interest include sexual
identity development in adolescents and young adults and the development
of sexual values in individuals and families.
CORRESPONDENCE CONCERNING THIS ARTICLE should be addressed to Mark
A. Yarhouse, School of Psychology, Regent University, CRB 161, 1000
Regent University Drive, Virginia Beach, VA 23464. E-mail:
[email protected]
530
RELIGIOUS CONFLICTS
solidating one’s sexual identity. Behavior can be both the cause
and the result of an attribution about what same-sex attraction
signals about a person, that is, that the attraction signals one’s true
identity. But this is not the only possible attribution. For example,
in one study, only 38.2% of interviewees who disidentified with a
lesbian, gay, or bisexual (LGB) identity reported initially thinking
that same-sex attraction signaled an LGB identity (Yarhouse &
Tan, 2004). In response to a related item, those who disidentified
with an LGB identity tended to attribute their same-sex attractions
to unmet emotional needs, parent– child dynamics, or a reflection
of “personal weakness,” making reference to a religious orienting
system or explanatory framework.
Religious Identity Development
This research brings us to a discussion of religion and religious
identity. Religion is often found to be a source of comfort, an
approach to life that provides guidance and security as well as
activities that confer numerous physical and emotional health
benefits and aid in coping (Exline, Yali, & Sanderson, 2000;
Pargament, Smith, Koenig, & Perez, 1998). Religion can also be a
source of strain and conflict (Exline, Yali, & Lobel, 1999). Religious struggles can center on God’s allowing pain and suffering to
exist, on perceived evil in the world, and on sacrificial living for
the purpose of cultivating certain virtues (Exline & Rose, 2005).
Religious conflicts have also been reported by those who identify
as LGB, and such conflicts can take the forms mentioned above as
well as dissatisfaction with teachings and interpretations of sacred
texts and congregational prejudice (Davidson, 2000; Schuck &
Liddle, 2001).
According to Hood, Spilka, Hunsberger, and Gorsuch (2003),
early theorists argued that religion is acquired, as religious identity
is shaped by culture and society (e.g., Allport, 1950). Their arguments led to various stage theories (e.g., Fowler’s [1981] stages of
faith development) and theological analyses (e.g., Loder’s [1998]
analysis of human development) that at least in some way are
indebted to Piaget’s (1952) model of cognitive stages of development and Kohlberg’s (1964) stages of moral development.
Other theorists focused on early attachment, drawing on the
work of Bowlby (1969) and applying it to religion (Hood et al.,
2003). These theorists saw a relationship between one’s image of
God and attachment to one’s parents. This view does not mean that
religion can or should be reduced to God image and attachment,
but it has led to interesting hypotheses for research (Hood et al.,
2003).
One can begin to appreciate, then, that religious socialization
may be a critical factor in religious identity development. Religious identity is shaped in the context of various social relationships—which include parents— but also with reference to questions and doubts that adolescents and young adults have (Exline,
2004; Hood et al., 2003). They discover for themselves that the
beliefs they held early on in life do not necessarily address the
complexities of their personal experiences with pain and suffering.
This discussion of the concept of religious identity brings us to
a related concept: spiritual identity. Richards and Bergin (1997)
defined spiritual identity as “a person’s sense of identity and worth
in relation to God and his or her place in the universe” (p. 178).
Those who have a positive spiritual identity believe in their worth
in God’s eyes and feel connected to a sense of God’s love of them.
531
Those who do not have a positive spiritual identity “do not feel that
they have divine worth or potential” (p. 179).
A salient concern is the reconciliation of adolescents’ feelings
and experiences with the God of their religion. Difficulties young
people have in coming to terms with who God is in relation to their
pain and disappointment can play a role in both their religious and
emotional lives (Exline et al., 1999). As Exline et al. suggest, what
makes disappointment with God complicated is that a young
person cannot gain the kind of insight into God’s behaviors that he
or she can into his or her own or others’ behaviors: “They must
come to terms with their anger and confusion based primarily on
their own faith and their interpretation of the distressing event”
(Exline et al., 1999, p. 374). Many adolescents and young adults in
the United States appear to resolve these conflicts and place great
value on their religious beliefs and identity, as measured by several
indexes of religiousness (Hood et al., 2003).
In the case of potential religious conflict and sexual identity
development, however, adolescents often find that their faith communities do not condone same-sex behavior or identification. In a
convenience sample of 65 LGB-identified individuals, about two
thirds of the respondents reported conflict between religion and
sexual identity, and the sources of conflict included doctrinal
teachings and interpretation of biblical passages (Schuck & Liddle,
2001). According to Schuck and Liddle, this conflict led to reports
of depression, shame, and suicidal ideation, which in turn led to a
number of ways to resolve the religious strain, including distinguishing between being spiritual and being religious, interpreting
scriptural passages differently, and leaving their original religions.
Other studies have suggested that some religious individuals conserve their religious beliefs and identity and instead transform the
meaning of their experiences of same-sex attraction (Wolkomir,
2001; Yarhouse & Tan, 2004; cf. Haldeman, 2004).
The Potential Conflict
Sexual identity can develop while religious identity is also
taking shape, and this co-development creates a potential conflict
for adolescents who hear competing claims about identity and
behavior. Adolescents ask “Who am I?” (Wright, 1982, p. 164),
and as they hear answers from the LGB community and from their
religious communities, they may also be asking, “Which [answers]
are authentic and which are not? Is there any one authoritative,
transcendent answer? Is there one meaningfulness transcending the
many meanings?” (p. 164). Adolescents are searching for meaning
and an ideology to which they can commit themselves.
In light of this interest in meaning and ideology, we want to
consider adolescents who are unsure of their sexual orientation as
well as adolescents who experience same-sex attraction but are
confused by their feelings or do not know whether they wish to
identify as LGB. Because both religion and sexual orientation are
identified as areas of diversity that are to be respected by psychologists (American Psychological Association, 2002), it may be
helpful to reflect on issues faced by adolescents who experience
same-sex attraction and report religious conflict or strain.
Religious Conflicts and Sexual Identity
Religious strain can be related to sexual attractions that, if acted
upon, conflict with doctrinal statements and interpretations of
YARHOUSE AND TAN
532
sacred texts that reflect to some extent one’s views of God. These
attractions can also indirectly limit social support from within
one’s religious community. Our discussion of religious conflict is
organized around the following themes: (a) religious orienting
systems, (b) negative emotions toward God, (c) attributions about
God, and (d) belief in God.
Religious Orienting Systems
Religious conflict or strain exists precisely because of the importance of religious beliefs, activities, and relationships:
From this perspective, life experiences cannot be understood outside
of a spiritual context. Life events have an impact on people not only
psychologically, socially, and physically but also spiritually. Furthermore, experiences that pose a threat to or damage the individual’s
spiritual beliefs, practices, values and relationships may be especially
distressing because they endanger those aspects of life that the individual holds sacred. People do not simply acquiesce to these threats,
however. In response to spiritual challenges, people struggle to hold
on to their spiritual values or, if necessary, transform their spirituality.
In this sense spiritual struggle is a distinctive and potent phenomenon,
a way of coping—not in a mundane or trivial sense, but in its most
profound form, when no less than the soul may be at stake. (Pargament, Murray-Swank, Magyar, & Ano, 2005, p. 247)
The potential for religious conflict may be related to the manner
in which adolescents fit their experience of same-sex attraction
into their religious orienting systems or explanatory frameworks.
Of course, religious orienting systems vary, though most have
historically affirmed heterosexual marriage as God’s intention for
full genital sexual expression. Adolescents may vary, too, in the
weight they give their religious orienting systems. Some adolescents may transform their religious beliefs and values to accommodate an LGB identity (e.g., Ritter & Terndrup, 2002; Wolkomir,
2001). They may join with those who hold dissenting views with
respect to the official teachings of their religion, or they may leave
their religion and embrace a spirituality that is not tied to a
traditional faith community (see Ritter & Terndrup, 2002, pp.
285–291).
Other adolescents may resolve ideological conflict by transforming the meaning of their experiences of attraction and conserving their existing religious beliefs and values (e.g., Wolkomir,
2001; Yarhouse & Tan, 2004), seeing their religious conflicts as
necessary for personal growth and transformation (see Brown &
Miller, 2005, and Emmons, 1999, for a discussion of personal
strivings).
There has been relevant research published that ties into the
present discussion of religious orienting systems. For example, in
a study of Christians who were affiliated with either the United
Fellowship of Metropolitan Community Churches (MCC, a gayaffirming community of faith) or Exodus International (a faithbased ministry for those who are conflicted about experiences of
same-sex attraction), both groups were concerned with living
“authentic” lives (Yarhouse & Tan, 2004). Those who identified as
LGB were concerned that denying “who they are” as LGB individuals signaled a kind of inauthentic way of living. Those who
were from Exodus were concerned with behaving and identifying
in ways that were consistent with what they believed was God’s
will for their lives and for their sexual expression and identity (see
also Wolkomir’s, 2001, ethnographic study of MCC and Exodus
support groups and the importance of “righteousness” to the group
from Exodus).
Negative Emotions Toward God
Among those who report religious struggles, anger is a common
negative emotion toward God. In studies of college-age students,
predictors of anger toward God included situational and individual
variables (Exline & Rose, 2005), such as seeing God as responsible and not feeling close to God prior to a distressing event
(situational) as well as trait anger, low self-esteem, and current
depression (individual). Confusion is actually one of the more
common negative emotions that can come across as anger, as a
person tries to make meaning out of his or her struggle (Exline,
2004). Other negative emotions include frustration and mistrust:
Kathy1 (14) was brought to therapy because she was experiencing
feelings of depression and distress as a result of unwanted feelings of
same-sex attraction. Kathy comes from a supportive evangelical
Christian family, and her parents have verbalized to her that in spite
of biblical teaching against same-sex behavior, if she decided to
identify as lesbian, their love for her is unconditional and they would
not reject her. Although Kathy states that she believes her parents, she
is unable to extend that level of acceptance to herself. She is plagued
by guilt, shame and condemnation fueled by the fear that God sees her
as “dirty.” Her fear that God does not love her is particularly distressing and compounds her feelings of depression because she is so
strongly identified with Christianity.
For young persons who experience same-sex attraction and
report feelings of confusion or mistrust toward God, these emotions can be related to wanting to be like others in their peer group,
or they may be tied to concerns they have over family and
faith-centered relationships:
Terri (17) shares that she feels pretty good about her identity as a
lesbian. She shares that it was not easy early on—when she first talked
to her friends, her sister, and, eventually, her mother about her sexual
identity. But she states that she is active in a gay–straight alliance at
school and feels content with who she sees herself as today. Her
frustrations are more tied to how her rabbi and others in her conservative synagogue will respond to her. She states that she wishes her
faith community would teach a message of greater tolerance and love
than they do now.
As this case example suggests, confusion, mistrust, and other
negative emotions may be directed at those who represent God
through religious affiliation or by virtue of their leadership
positions.
Attributions About God
We are beginning to touch on the attributions a person makes
about God as they struggle with their circumstances. Common
attributions include viewing God as having positive intentions or
noting that God is not making sense. Less common is viewing God
as cruel or uncaring (Exline, 2004). Attributions about God may be
a critical consideration for the young person who experiences
1
Each case example is from an actual case seen by one of the authors.
The names and specific identifying information have been changed to
protect confidentiality.
RELIGIOUS CONFLICTS
sexual identity confusion. Potential attributions about God or ways
of reframing that might reduce anger toward God include the
following: (a) Suffering may be a consequence of wrongdoing by
another person, (b) God may be unable to prevent suffering as
such, and (c) God has a broader view that a human being cannot
fully grasp (Exline, 2004).
Adolescents are trying to sort out how to think about who God
is and where God is in their circumstances. If they believe that God
is powerful and capable of influencing human events, their questions may include “God, why do you choose not to do something?”
“Are you limited in some way?” “Do you have other purposes in
mind?” and “Do you have a broader view than I can see?”
In terms of where God is, questions may include “Where is God
in my life?” “God, where are you in my feelings of confusion?”
and “What is your will for my life?” These and other questions
may be critical ones to wrestle with as adolescents sort out their
attributions about God.
Belief in God
Last, there has been some fascinating empirical research suggesting that those who say they do not believe in God report more
anger toward God than those who do believe in God (Exline et al.,
1999). According to the researchers, the best predictor of belief in
God following a conflict is whether individuals turn away from or
reject God. If a person turns toward God and comes to a place of
reconciliation, he or she reports an increase in belief in God;
however, if a person rejects God or withdraws from God, that
person is more likely to report a decrease in belief in God.
In some respects, the attributions an adolescent makes about
who God is, coupled with the ability to sort out and come to terms
with negative emotions, may very well lead to increased or decreased belief in God. Being able to reframe conflict or suffering,
to come to a place of insight and peace about it, will likely lead to
increased belief in God and decreased anger toward God, which
are important to adolescents who have a strong religious identity.
But not being able to reframe suffering, to be left to live in a place
of anxiety and frustration about one’s circumstances, will likely
lead an adolescent away from God and to greater anger toward
God.
Suggestions for Addressing Religious and Sexual Identity
Conflicts
We turn now to practical suggestions for addressing religious
conflicts that may present alongside sexual identity confusion. We
are essentially referring to the dilemma adolescents face if they
experience conflicts between religious teachings and sexual identity and behavior. Again, we focus this discussion in ways that
show respect for diversity in both sexual orientation and religion
(American Psychological Association, 2002).
Assess for Religious Orienting Systems and Coping
Resources
Understanding religious orienting systems is critical to addressing religious conflict or strain. Psychologists can also expect
religious orienting systems to touch on hope, gratitude, responsibility, morality and values, as well as commitments and vocation
533
(i.e., purpose and life satisfaction) (Sperry & Giblin, 1996). Psychologists can identify religious orienting systems by simply including religion and spirituality in assessment (Lovinger, 1996),
by asking about how adolescents’ religious beliefs and values
inform how they approach sexual identity issues, as well as by
asking about ways in which their presenting concern has affected
their religious functioning (Hathaway, 2003). Psychologists can
also invite adolescents to talk about what their faith specifically
teaches about human sexuality, identity, and behavior. This allows
for discussion of and reflection on what adolescents believe about
what is taught.
Psychologists can also explore with adolescents ways in which
religion has been a resource in coping. Teens who identify as LGB
are at greater risk than those who do not for health-compromising
behaviors and negative emotions (Ritter & Terndrup, 2002, pp.
116 –120; see also Hershberger & D’Augelli, 2000). These are
concerns that many in the field view as related to negative societal
messages about an LGB identity. Psychologists can help teens
develop a range of coping behaviors, including various religiously
congruent coping activities, such as discussing spiritual concepts
(e.g., sanctification), religious relaxation or imagery exercises,
practicing spiritual disciplines (e.g., solitude, fasting, corporate
worship), reading religious bibliotherapy resources, therapist and
client prayer, the use of forgiveness, meditation, and journal writing. These coping behaviors are most suitable for adolescents who
view their religious identity as a source of guidance, comfort, or
strength (Richards & Bergin, 1997).
It may also be helpful for psychologists to be aware of the
various LGB-centered religious communities that have emerged as
vehicles for support of young adults who identify as LGB. These
communities represent efforts to support an LGB identity from
within Protestant Christian, Catholic, Mormon, and Jewish traditions (Ritter & Terndrup, 2002). Many of these LGB-centered
religious communities and ministries encourage socialization with
other LGB-identifying teens and provide family and community
support that attempts “to reconcile traditional beliefs with minority
sexual orientations” (Ritter & Terndrup, 2002, p. 283).
LGB-centered religious ministries may be valuable to adolescents and families who identify and support an LGB identity.
However, these ministries do not represent traditional religious
teaching on sexuality, and this may be of concern to adolescents
and their families who adhere to conservative religious beliefs and
values. In these cases, families will likely value community support and resources that reflect their religious beliefs. Unfortunately, some of these ministries have been identified with controversies surrounding sexual reorientation. It should be noted that
not all ministries today focus on such change. Many focus on
ministering to people by supporting a religious identity and providing encouragement and accountability around sexual identity
and behavior.
Give Permission to Explore Negative Emotions Toward
God
In addition to identifying religious orienting systems and religiously congruent coping activities and support systems, it is
important to give adolescents permission to explore and express
negative emotions toward God, such as anger. Anger is actually a
broader, diffuse emotion that is often tied to other negative emo-
YARHOUSE AND TAN
534
tions (Exline et al., 1999). As noted above, the most common of
these are confusion, followed by frustration and mistrust. This
would be an important place to begin with an adolescent who
experiences religious strain. However, it should be noted that
adolescents may be hesitant to share negative emotions toward
God, particularly if they come from a faith tradition that does not
see anger toward God as an acceptable emotion (Exline, 2004).
Clinicians can use their knowledge of this research to offer a
ubiquity statement, such as “Many young people who go through
struggles find that they have negative feelings toward God, at least
for a time—feelings such as confusion or frustration— how about
you?” This kind of question gives adolescents permission to talk
about negative emotions and to feel that they are not alone in
having these feelings. The therapeutic relationship, then, can be a
place for teens to explore a variety of negative emotions, confusion
often being chief among them.
Clinicians can also explore the extent to which adolescents see
God as responsible for their dilemma. As indicated in the case
examples above, for some adolescents, this might entail a discussion of how God could allow them to have same-sex feelings. For
other adolescents, the most salient question might be why people
who represent God and their religious faith are not more supportive or loving toward them regardless of their sexual identity.
Explore Attributions About God
When psychologists give adolescents permission to explore
negative emotions toward God, they join them on an emotional
journey that might be referred to as an “attributional search” about
God (Exline, 2004; Wong & Weiner, 1981). From the adolescents’
perspective, the question is whether God has positive intentions
toward them. Whether the answer is yes or no, it will be important
for adolescents to reflect on how they arrived at an answer to this
question. Recall that a positive spiritual identity is thought of as an
adolescent’s belief that he or she has worth in God’s eyes (Richards & Bergin, 1997). This spiritual identity can be of great
importance to religious youths. Also, if adolescents believe that
God does not have positive intentions toward them, they may be at
greater risk for feeling anger toward God.
Gene (15) came into the session and shared that he has had it. He
heard a recent message at his church in which the speaker went on
about God’s love for all people who love and follow God’s law. Gene
shared his belief that God’s law limits full sexual intimacy to heterosexual marriage, and he is trying to make sense out of his belief that
God made him with same-sex feelings but no sexual outlet that is
sanctioned by the God he worships.
How does Gene make sense of who God is and what God’s
purposes are in light of his confusion? Does God simply not make
sense in his present circumstances, or is God uncaring with respect
to his dilemma? A related consideration is whether Gene believes
that God is mad at him. Does he believe that God feels punitive or
angry toward him? Permission giving and an open, collaborative
therapeutic posture can lead to the exploration of these and related
questions.
Address Family Conflicts Surrounding Ideological
“Transformation” and “Conservation”
It was mentioned earlier that some adolescents and their families
may resolve ideological conflicts with traditional religious orient-
ing systems by transforming their religious values to accommodate
an LGB identity. Others may resolve conflict by transforming the
meaning of their experiences of attraction and conserving their
existing religious beliefs and values. Some of the most challenging
cases involve family members who are in conflict over ideological
transformation and conservation, the more likely scenario consisting of conservative parents who reject an LGB identity and the
explanatory framework and behaviors that express that identity. In
these cases, it is important to remember that parents are critical
proximal agents and stakeholders in their children’s lives. Their
support is essential, and family therapy that focuses on the ways in
which the parents’ religion promotes love and acceptance of their
adolescent can be a better way to lay a foundation for communication and problem solving than is an approach that underscores
their religion’s behavioral proscriptions. In this sense, the clinician
may bring to the foreground existing religious beliefs that may
have receded to the background during parents’ initial emotional
reactions to learning that their adolescent experiences same-sex
attraction or is identifying as LGB.
A concern can arise if the adolescent or family members bring
up passages from sacred texts, such as the Bible, that support the
teaching that same-sex behavior is a moral concern. In this case,
although psychologists can point out that there are minority voices
that disagree with traditional interpretations of scripture, we see it
as counterproductive, on at least three grounds, to disregard a
traditional religious moral evaluative framework that is valued by
a family. First, science cannot speak to the moral status of sexual
behavior; psychologists can quickly move beyond their areas of
competence when addressing biblical theology. Second, psychologists are to respect religion, including traditional expressions of
religion, and must be cautious about working from a bias that
might erroneously reject as prejudice what may actually be formed
judgments. Finally, such a posture may create a barrier between
the psychologist and the family that undermines the therapeutic
relationship. A cut-off at this point may keep both the family and
the adolescent from accessing needed services. The more useful
clinical posture, in our view, is to try to understand the conflict
from each family member’s perspective, to point out possible
tensions among beliefs or values, to explore a variety of approaches to the topic, and to offer to navigate both the religious
and sexual identity concerns in many of the ways we have been
suggesting.
Be Cautious About Disputation
Bringing up sacred texts in therapy raises the issue of whether to
dispute religious beliefs and values. In our view, clinicians should
generally avoid disputing religious beliefs and values for ethical
and professional– clinical reasons (Johnson, 2004). In unusual
cases in which psychologists believe they should dispute religious
beliefs, psychologists can follow guidelines for raising considerations that “create dissonance between discordant beliefs” (Johnson, 2004, p. 261; see also Johnson, 2001). As Johnson (2004)
suggested, this may involve logical, empirical, and functional
disputations. Logical disputations involve commenting on what
appear to be more arbitrary or unreasonable beliefs, whereas
empirical disputations involve pointing out when beliefs do not
appear to fit with what is known factually. Functional disputations
challenge beliefs that lead to self-defeating thoughts, feelings, and
RELIGIOUS CONFLICTS
behaviors. However, disputing religious beliefs should be done
very carefully and should be reserved for the rare cases in which
“strong religious views are contrary to the entire body of a religion
and clearly linked to emotional and behavioral dysfunction and
pain” (Johnson, 2004, p. 261); it should not be conducted on the
basis of conflicts with current findings or be based on the particular religious beliefs, values, or ideological commitments of the
psychologist. This distinction may be difficult to discern and is
open to future professional discussion, but formed judgments
about same-sex behavior, for example, do not tend to run contrary
to the “entire body of a religion” that includes doctrine on the
design and purposes of human sexuality and sexual expression,
whereas the rejection of an adolescent and the resulting emotional
cut-offs and failure to provide adequate emotional support seem to
be contrary to the overall teachings of the major world religions.
Conclusion
As these recommendations suggest, a number of challenges
arise when psychologists consider the range of issues that may be
faced by adolescents who experience religious conflict in light of
their same-sex attractions. Careful attention to the many ways in
which religious strain may come about, be explored, and eventually be resolved may help psychologists provide services that are
more relevant to adolescents experiencing sexual identity confusion and religious conflicts.
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Received August 13, 2004
Revision received May 13, 2005
Accepted May 31, 2005 䡲