A Guide for Parents
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An initiative of the Department of Trade
and Industry, the NYDA and SAB
Ukugadwa kahle ngabazali
sekukhombisile ukuthi yiyona
ndlela eyodwa nenkulu
ekunqandeni ukusetshenziswa
kabi kotshwala yintsha.
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Teenagers and alcohol:
a dangerous mix
In South Africa, drinking is a part of the lifestyle
As a caring parent and a good role model, you can make
a big difference and help your teenager not become a
statistic. Good parenting has been shown to be the single
biggest factor in avoiding alcohol abuse in youth. You
can help your teens make responsible decisions in life by
building their self-confidence and self-worth. Having
confidence helps teenagers make safe, educated
decisions. Confident teenagers are more equipped to
avoid people and situations that aren’t necessarily right
for them, and to find those that are.
Why are teens drinking?
Your teenager faces a
number of tough decisions
daily and peer pressure has
a big impact on many of
those decisions. Your teen
may be afraid that if they
say no to something
harmful, they won’t be
accepted.
Teenagers drink to rebel
Part of being a teenager is
rebelling against what their
parents or caregivers tell
them to do. But when an
angry teenager drinks they
can become more angry and
aggressive. This could have
disastrous results.
Teenagers drink to look cool
Teenagers drink to escape
Batjha ba nwella ho ananelwa.
Teenagers drink because
they are bored
Teenagers want to fit in and to
be part of the crowd. They often
lack self-confidence and alcohol
works quickly to get rid of
feelings of inferiority.
Teens drink because of peer
pressure
This is one of the biggest
reasons that teens drink.
If their friends drink and they
don’t, they run the risk of
looking like a nerd. It’s also
sometimes the way to join a
“cool” group or be one of the
crowd.
Teenagers drink because
they have no sense of hope
With only half of our youths
living in two-parent households,
the prospect of 25% to 35%
unemployment and only a
small percentage
of school leavers finding jobs,
the South African teenager
faces a very uncertain future.
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Teenagers often feel frustrated,
anxious about how socially
acceptable they are, depressed,
angry, etc. Alcohol is a means of
escaping this.
Some teenagers get bored
easily and crave constant
excitement and even danger.
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Some of the issues around underage drinking are
highlighted here. Some may come as a surprise and some
may not. You decide.
• 1 in 2 teenagers in the average South African home is a
user of alcohol
• Almost half the learners (49%) interviewed in a recent
secondary school survey said that they had drunk alcohol
at some stage during their school career
• In the same survey, 15% of boys and 8% of girls said that
they’d had their first drink before the age of 13
• Having five or more drinks in a single session is
considered to be binge drinking and makes you a problem
drinker
Half of the students who admitted to drinking (23% to
35%) said that they had had a binge drinking session
(had five or more drinks on one occasion) in the month
before the survey
• People who begin drinking before the age of 15 are four
times more likely to develop alcohol dependence than
those who have their first drink at age 20 or older
• Teens that use alcohol are three times more likely to be
involved in violent crime
• Teenagers who drink are far more likely to try illegal
drugs. In fact, research shows that 67% of teens who drink
before the age of 15 will go on to use illegal drugs. They
are 22 times more likely to use marijuana, and 50 times
more likely to use cocaine
• Some youth start abusing alcohol from age 12
• 60% of Grade 8 to 11 learners who abused alcohol in a
local research study had to repeat their grade
What are the
risk factors and consequences?
Firstly, it is against the law for people
under the age of 18 to buy alcohol. If
caught, they could land up with a heavy
fine or even spend a period in jail.
Crime and violence: teenagers who
drink open themselves up to all types of
consequences. They increase their risk
of being hurt through events such as car
accidents or violence; they may be more
susceptible to getting drawn into crime,
such as stealing and more than 50% of
rape sufferers are abused whilst drunk.
Girls who drink can also become easy
targets for rape (especially date rape).
Risky sexual behaviour
Drinking lowers your defenses and teens
who drink are more likely to be
sexually active and take unnecessary
sexual risks such as unprotected sex.
This could result in unwanted
pregnancies, life threatening sexually
transmitted diseases and HIV.
Mahlatsipa a fetang 50% a peto a
hlekefetswa a tahilwe.
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Problems at school
A study of high school
students found a strong
connection between binge
drinking, school dropouts
and low academic
aspirations.
Psychological problems
Researchers have found
symptoms of depression
(disturbed sleep, appetite
loss and lack of pleasure)
associated with teenagers
who abuse alcohol.
Physical problems
During their teen years,
youths’ brains are still
developing and maturing
and it takes until they’re in
their mid-twenties to fully
mature. Alcohol negatively
affects the development,
and this and can create
long lasting damage to
brain cells and neural
pathways.
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Izinkinga emzimbeni: Ngesikhathi bethomba, imiqondo
yabo isuke isakhula bese kuthi ukuvuthwa kwayo kuze
kuphelele uma sebephakathi neminyaka yo-20. Utshwala
buphazamisa kabi ukukhula komqondo kungadala
ukulimala kwama-cells omqondo kanye nemithambo
lapho umcabango uhamba khona.
Alcoholism
Teenagers who begin drinking before the age of 15 are much more
likely to develop a drinking problem than those who only start
drinking when they are in their twenties. And teenagers who drink are
more likely to experiment with other drugs such as marijuana and
cocaine.
What are the signs that your teenager
might be drinking?
The following are signs that your
teenager might be drinking or have a
drinking problem. If at any stage you
suspect anything, trust your instincts
and talk to your child about it
immediately.
Some of these signs are normal
teenager behaviour. However, if you
spot several of them at the same
time, or they suddenly appear or are
extreme, then they might indicate a
drinking problem.
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• Mood changes: tempers, irritability, defensiveness or aggression
• Problems at school: missing school and bunking, pretending to be
sick and staying at home, low grades, and/or disciplinary action
• Rebelling against family rules
• Changing friends and not wanting to introduce you to the new
friends
• Change of attitude and not caring about anything: sloppy dressing,
not bathing, brushing hair or teeth, not being interested in
activities they were interested in before
• Finding alcohol in your teenager’s room or school bag or smelling
alcohol on their breath
• Physical and mental problems: blackouts, not being able to
remember events, poor concentration, bloodshot eyes, lack of
coordination or slurred speech
“I don’t know what happened, she turned 15
and suddenly got moody and withdrawn. She
didn’t feel like my child anymore…then the bad
marks started…then I found out she was
drinking heavily on weekends.”
Mother, 38, Alberton
How can you help?
The introduction of alcohol into the
home is a personal matter and is
something that parents need to decide
on. If a parent does decide to allow
access to alcohol, it is important to
recognise the risks. How it is
introduced, managed and discussed
will differ from family to family but it is
one of the responsibilities that parents
have towards their children. Teens who
have an open and trusting relationship
with their parents are less likely to use
and abuse alcohol. They are more likely
to come to their parents for advice and
help if they know that their parents
are there to help instead of criticise
or lecture them. In talking with your
child about reasons to avoid underage
drinking, stay away from scare tactics.
Most young teens are aware that many
people drink without problems, so it is
important to discuss the consequences
of underage drinking. Build their selfesteem by telling them that they are
too smart and don’t need alcohol to
fulfill their dreams.
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Discuss great
sportspeople, artists,
actors, DJs and
entrepreneurs with your
teen. Many soccer stars’
careers are over by age
30. It is important that
they know they won’t
always get a second shot,
so they need to make the
best of their talents and
opportunities.
Uma ukhuluma
nomtanakho ngezi
zathu zokungaphuzi
esemncane,ungalokothi
umethuse. Iningi
lentsha lazi kahle
ukuthi abantu abaningi
baphuza ngaphandle
kwezinkinga,ngakhoke
kumqoka ukukhuluma
ngemiphumela
yokuphuza usemncane.
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Start talking to them about alcohol when they are young
As a parent you should start explaining drinking to your children from
the age of about 10 or 11 (Grade 5) or even earlier. It needs to start
this young as they are probably already talking to friends about it.
If you don’t explain the dangers, they could think it’s cool and try a
drink when offered. Do not be afraid that you will push them away by
talking to them about the problem. Teenagers need to know that you
believe in them enough to take the time to talk and listen to them.
Your involvement can affect their decision-making. When they know
that someone believes in them and in their future, it has a positive
influence in their lives.
Here are some ways to encourage
your teenager to talk to you:
• Talk to your child about what
interests them. Encourage them to
tell you about their lives and their
interests. Listen without interrupting
• Ask questions that they can’t answer
with just a “yes” or a “no”. Ask
questions that will begin a
conversation such as “what do you
think about teenagers drinking?”
• Control your reaction. If you’re told
something that makes you angry,
don’t react immediately. Explain why
you don’t approve of the behaviour
• Don’t lecture or criticise your
teenager. If they know that you
respect their opinion and aren’t being
too controlling, they will be more
likely to listen to you and respect your
opinion
• Show that you care. Try to spend
one-on-one time with your teens
because although they may not
show it, it is very important to
them that they are important to
you
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Help your child say
“no”. As a parent you
can try to be as aware as
possible, but the reality
is that you can’t be there
all the time and your
child needs to be able to
say “no” and stand up to
peer pressure. One of
the best ways to handle
the issue is to help equip
your child to stand up
for him/herself and find
ways to say “no” without
looking like a nerd.
For example, “not now
thanks, maybe later”
or “no thanks, I take
my sport seriously so I
don’t drink”. You could
also encourage them to
blame it on you and say
“no thanks, my dad will
breathalyse me when I
get home.”
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‘The Positive No’ is a good
technique to teach your teen. It
equips teens to use their power and
at the same time preserve their
friendship. Unlike an ordinary ‘no’, a
‘Positive No’ begins with a ‘yes’ and
ends with a ‘yes’.
The Positive No involves, first of all,
saying yes to yourself and what is
important to you. Here’s an example:
• Yes: “I need to go to soccer
practice
because I want to play for South
Africa one day.”
• No: “So I cannot go drinking with
you.”
• Yes!: “I value our friendship. I still
want to hang out with you; I’m just
choosing not to drink with you.”
Drink responsibly in front of your
teenagers. Children copy the adults
around them so drink responsibly
around them and you’ll be a great
role model.
Don’t encourage underage drinking.
Don’t serve alcohol to your teenager
or their friends, even if it’s just a light
beer. Don’t send your children to buy
alcohol for yourself or anyone else.
Find out who your
children’s friends are, and
get to know them. You will
quickly be able to spot if
there’s trouble and take
steps to fix the situation.
Encourage your
teenager to participate
in extra mural school
activities. If they’re doing
something they enjoy, with
friends who are like them,
then they are less likely to
hang around with
teenagers who drink
because they’re bored.
Encourage your teen to
participate in controlled
after-school and weekend
activities that are
challenging and fun. If your
community doesn’t have
after-school activities,
consider getting together
with other parents and
teens to help create some
activities for young people
in your community.
Hlala ukhumbula ukuthi
uma ungaphuzi,
ungathathi ngokuthi
nabantabakho abaphuzi
nabo.
Establish home rules about drinking and the consequences of
breaking them. Tell your teenagers what you expect from them
and what you think appropriate behaviour is. Also decide what the
consequences are if they break your rules and be consistent in
enforcing the punishment. Keep in mind that if you are not a
drinker, you must not assume that your children are not drinking.
Here are some tips to help build your children’s confidence and
resilience:
• Encourage your children to try again if they fail and help them
understand that everyone makes mistakes.”It’s okay if you can’t
do something the first time you try it.”
• Praise your child’s efforts. If an exam or game doesn’t work out
the way your child wanted, try to praise them for the effort they
put into the activity. You could also suggest some ideas about
what he/she could do differently to be successful next time.
Some quick facts on teenagers and alcohol (and drugs)
• School kids who use alcohol or drugs are 3 times more
likely to be involved with violent crimes
• Some youth start abusing alcohol from age 12 and younger
• 50% of Grade 11 learners admitted that they have used
alcohol in the last year
• 31% of school learners drink socially
• 60% of Grade 8-11 learners in Cape schools that misuse
alcohol had to repeat their grade
• By the age of 18, more than 60% of teenagers have
become drunk. 30% had used school time or work time to
drink
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Help them get help
If you think you have a teen with a
drinking problem, don’t ignore it.
It could get worse. Do something
about it. Talk to them or give them
some contacts that keep requests
anonymous, and are equipped to
really help.
Talk to them about it and if you
need more help, please contact one
of the following:
SAB ‘You Decide’ help line*
SADAG
0800 33 33 77
(011) 262-6396
(South African Depression & Anxiety Group)
Tough Love
Life Line
Alcoholics Anonymous
Al-Anon
(0861) 868 445
(0861) 322 322
0861 4357 22
(031) 304 1826
*The SAB ‘You Decide’ helpline is an
advisory helpline only, and SAB, the DTI and
NYDA cannot be held liable for any
consequences arising from the advice.
This material was prepared
by the programme’s funding
partners: the Department of Trade
and Industry, the National Youth
Development Agency and the
South African Breweries, in
collaboration with the International
Center for Alcohol Policies and
other subject matter experts
including the ARA and South
African education and curriculum
specialists. Material is not
copyrighted and may be
reproduced and distributed.
www.youdecide.org.za.
You Decide.
Sources:
Substance Abuse and The Young: Taking Action (Medical Research Council -June 2009), A Word About
Parenting Teens (American Academy of Paediatrics), Tips for Teens: The Truth About Alcohol (US Department
of Health & Human Services), The Progression of Alcohol (The South African Depression & Anxiety Group),
Young Peoples Drinking- Key Facts and Issues (International Center for Alcohol Policies), Young People and
Alcohol (International Center for Alcohol Policies), Alcohol’s damaging effects on the brain (The National
Institute of Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism), Teenagers and Alcohol: A guide for parents and teenagers
(The Industry Association for responsible Alcohol Use), Make a difference- Talk to your child about alcohol
(The National Institute of Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism), What every educator needs to know (Sarah Fisher,
Bridges 1999-2003, updated by Cape Info), Are you an addict or alcoholic? (SANCA guidelines based on John
Hopkins University Hospital’s questionnaire), Statistics (Central Drugs Authority, 2009), Winning your child
(The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA) at Columbia University, John MacArthur and
ToughLove SA), Youth and substance abuse (Die Beeld, 05.03.2010) “Keeping Your Kids Drug-Free” (National
Youth Anti-Drug Media Campaign, Office of National Drug Control Policy), Start Talking efore they start
drinking (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Service Administration), Underage drinking and illicit drug use
(Findings from the 2002–2006 National Surveys on Drug Use and Health); Teen Binge Drinking (The South
African National Youth Risk Behaviour Survey 2002), The Link Between Early Alcohol Use and Alcohol
Dependence (The National Institute of Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism)