RESEARCH REPORT #,14
National
Organizationof
Mothers
SUBJECT:
Of
RESEARCHER:
Twins
clubs, Inc.
DATE:
GRANDPARENTINGMULTIPLES
National Organizationof Mothers of Twins Clubs, Inc.
|ss4-lsss
PURPOSE:
The purposeof this study was to explore grandparents'attitudesand concens about being
a grandparentof multiples.
METHOD:
A questionnairewas printed in MOTC's Notebookand a National Mailing. The survey
was to be filled out by grandparentsof multiples.
BACKGROUND INFORMATION:
This surveywas completedby 504 grandparents
of multiples.The majority, 438, werecompletedby
grandmothers.The grandparentsrangedin age from 35 to over 76 yearsof age, however, most of the
grandparents
were 51-70yearsof age.330 of the 504 respondents
werethe maternalgrandparents
of the
grandchildren
multiples.The multipletlpes of the
were: 123 identical;214 ftaterrr'.l,samesex; 133
fraternal,boy/girl; 18 unknown;and 3 triplets,quads,etc.
RESULTS:
l.
66% of the grandparents
could alwaystell their multiplegrandchildrenapart;22%could most of
the time; and only 3 grandparentssaid they could never tell them apart.
2.
96% of the grandchildrenlived in a two parenthome.
3.
Only 39% of the grandparents
alwaysagreedwith the parentingstyle of the multiples' caregiver;
56% usuallyagreed;and only 3 grandparents
rarelyagreed.
4.
74% of the grandparents
saidthey wouldbe willing and ableto raisethe multiplesif something
happenedto their parents;18% wereunsure;and7% wouldn'tbe willing.
5.
42% of the grandparents
lived in the sametown as the multiples;22% lived 1/2 to 2 hoursaway;
13% lived 2-5 hoursaway; and 23% livd, more than5 hoursaway.
6.
138 grandparents
sawthe multiplesseveraltimesa week; 103sawthem oncea week; 58 saw
them twice a month; 85 saw them onceevery month or two; 69 saw them 3-4 times a year; 42
saw them 1-2 timesa year; and 7 sawthemrarely.
7.
62% saidthey would like to seetheir grandchildren
more often;37% wouldn't change;and I less
often.
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RESEARCHREPORT#44
Page 2
8.
The most commonreasonsfor not seeingthe multiplesoften as they would like were: distanceto
travel too long (178); grandparent
busy with a job, etc. (74); parentstoo busy with jobs, etc.
(61); and multiplestoo busy (5).
9.
The multiplesvisitedtheir grandparents
on the following occasions:holidays(5g%); birthdays
(44%); vacatiors(35%); illness(18%); crises(L7%); awiversaries(r4vo)i anytime,no special
occasion(77%). L3% said THEY usuallyhad to visit the multiples.The grandparenrs
visitedthe
multipleson the following occasions:birthdays(56%); holidays(55%); vications (28%); illness
(27%); crises(25%); anytime,no specialoccasion(83%). 3% saidthey lived too iar awayto visit
the multiples.
10.
75% of the grandparents
felt that they werealwaystreatedthe sameas the other set of
grandparents
on holidays,birthdays,ete.; lO% felt that way someof the time.
11.
47% felt that they spenta reasonablyequalamountof time with their multiplegrandchildrenas
comparedto the other set of grandparents;
however32% felt that they did not ipend equal
amountsof time. Of this 32%, almostthree-fourthssaidthat THEY spentmoreiime with rheir
grandchildren.The time spentwasunequalbecauseof: long distanceio travel(67%);
grandparent'schoice(207o);parenr'schoice(6%); andotherreasons(i1%). Aimosi 75% of the
grandparents
saidthat they did NOT feel that they werein competitionwith the other set of
grandparents.
12.
Orny4% of grandparents
thought they shouldalwaysoffer advicein the discipliningof the
multiple grandchildren;42% said someof the time; 47% saidNEVER; and 67 weie unsure.
22% saidthey felt free to disciplinetheir grandchildren
using the parent'sform of disciplineonly;
12% usedtheir own form; while over half saidthey useda combinationof their own and the
parent'sstyleof disciphne.
13.
Three-fourthsof the grandparents
saidthey wereNEVER accusedof favoringthe multiplesover
singletongrandchildren,while only 4% said,they were, but only rarely.
14.
Almost half of the grandparents
said they would babysitanytimethey were asked;3j % wottld,
dependingon their schedrrle;and.only 2% saidno. Major ieasonsgiven for not babysittingwere
living too far awayand the grandparent's
work schedule.
15.
About one-fourthof the grandparents
babysatonceor twice a weekfor the multiples;anotheronefourth babysatonceor twice month; whire3% babysatdaily for the multiples.bnly s
of,h"
1
grandparents
said they were always-paidfor babysitting;19 were sometimeipaia; riz said they
were neverofferedpayment;and g2 said it wasofferedbut they wouldn't aciept. Almost
90%
tnev would Nor prefer to get paid, while lessthan 1% saidthey would. over 90% said
1{a
"No" when
askedif they felt they were askedto watchthe multiprestoo often.
16'
9o% of thegrandparents
said they alwaystried to spendthe sameamounton presentsfor the
multiples:6% did this sometimes;and2% did not try to spendrhesame.Almost 7O%
said.they
also tried to spendthe sam€on a singletongrandchildastirey spentfor eactr
muttipie; 3% spent
more on the singleton;and2% spentmore on the multiples.
RESEARCHREPORT#'14
Page 3
l7 .
8Voof the grandparents
saidthey boughtthe samepresentfor the multiplesall the time; 7 %
boughtdifferentpresentsall the time; 18%boughtdifferentpresentsmost of the time; 24%
boughtthe samemost ofthe time; and4l% saidit depended
on the gift whetherit will be the
sameor different. Over 907oof the grandparentsfelt that they were properly thankedfor gifts
given. If the parentsaskedfor certainitemsNOT to be bought,85% of the grandparents
always
respectedtheir wishes;7% did sometimes;5% said it depended
on wharthe gift was; andZ% felt
that the choiceof a gift wasup to the grandparent.
18.
When takingthe multiplegrandchildrenout, the grandparents
enjoyed:the park (34%); a walk
(21%);shopping(10%);sportingevents(L%): movies(2%).
19.
The typesof "Grandparent"functionsattendedwere: schoolevenrs(31%); recitals(17%):
daycareprograms(17%); sportsevents(18%); andMOTC events(23Vo)(Grandparents
were
askedto mark all that applied).30% saidthey would like to attendbut were unableto due to
distance,health,etc., and 5% saidthey had attendednoneby their own choice.
* * r<*+ t,F * + + + + + + 1.*** *+ + * + + + ++ * ** * *:* * * + +* * * * + + *+ + ** * * *:* x *** +:f* *+,F*** * * * * +* *,{.* * r.* i. * r(!r
CONCLUSION:
t.
Most grandparents
could tell their multiplegrandchildren
apart.
Most grandparents
agreedwith the parentingstyleof the multiples'caregiver.
3.
Three-fourthsof the grandparents
would be willing and ableto raisethe multiplesif something
happenedto their parents.
4.
Most grandparents
saidthey would like to seetheir multiplegrandchildrenmore often. The main
reasonsfor not seeingthe multiplesas oftenas they would like were: distanceto travel too far;
grandparent
wasbusy with job; parentsweretoo busywith jobs; andthe multipleswere too busy.
5.
Occasionsfor visits were: holidays,birthdays,vacations,anniversaries,
and during times of crisis
or illness.Most saidthey didn't needa specialoccasionto visit their grandchildren- they like to
seethem anytime!
o.
Most grandparents
felt that they weretreatedthe sameas the otherset of grandparents.
When one
grandparents
set of
spentmore time with the multiplesit wasusuallybecausethey lived closerto
them.
7.
Most grandparents
agreedwith the parents'styleof discipline,andthey usuallyuseda
combinationof their own andthe parents'styleof discipline.
8.
Most grandparents
werehappyto babysitthe multipleswheneverasked.Reasonsfor not
babysittingwere mainlydistanceand the grandparent's
work schedule.A few grandparents
were
paid to babysit,but mostsaidthey didn't want to be paid.
q
Most of the grandparents
tried to spendthe sameon eachchild for gifts, whetherthey were a
multipleor singletonchild. Grandparents
sometimes
boughtidenticalgifts for the multiples, while
most said it dependedon the gift whetherit would be the sameor different.
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RESEARCHREPORT#44
10.
Favoriteactivitieswith the multipleswere:goingto thepark, takinga walk, shopping,and
attendingmoviesor Epoltingevents.
11.
enjoyedattendingthesetypesof functions:schoolevents,recitals,daycare
Grandparents
prograrns,sportsevents,andMOTC events.
Page4
Pleaserefer to Research Report #45, rrYour Multiples' Grandparent.'r Included in this Research
Report are some comparisons between the answers grven by the graldparents and the answen given
by the parents of multiples.