Noncognitive Conversation Starters: Questions for Young People about the Soft Skills for Success Educators, youth program leaders, parents, and other caring adults are increasingly focused on helping young people develop the personal, social, and emotional skills they need to succeed in some type of college, a career, and citizenship. These key competencies are also referred to as “soft skills” and sometimes as noncognitive skills. To help inform the ongoing national discussion of this topic, the non-­‐
profit research and improvement organization Search Institute has created an online Soft Skills Prioritization Poll that invites people to indicate which noncognitive skills they would most like to measure and help young people develop in their schools, programs, families, and communities. If you haven’t already taken that poll, please visit http://www.search-­‐institute.org/content/soft-­‐skills-­‐
prioritization-­‐poll to do so. As a resource to accompany the Soft Skills Survey, Search Institute has also developed the following Noncognitive Conversation Starters to help you talk about personal, social, and emotional skills with the young people in your life. These questions are intended for use with adolescents in middle or high school. They could be used in a school advisory program, a mentoring relationship, a discussion group during an after-­‐school program, or during informal discussions at home. You could pose these questions over an extended period of time or all at once during a concentrated conversation about the soft skills for success. However you decide to use them, we hope they lead to great conversations and deeper connections. Academic Motivation What it means and why it matters: Academic motivation is the desire to learn or to succeed in school. Academic motivation is illustrated by an active personal commitment to learning, a sense of interest, and an overall attitude of persistence and competence toward challenges. 1. What is an activity or subject that you never get sick of doing or talking about? Could that activity become a hobby or career when you are older? 2. Tell me about a time when you worked hard on a project—not because you were required to, but because you really wanted to. 3. Do you think working hard can actually make you smarter, or does it just get more work done? 4. What do you think of paying students to earn certain grades? What are the benefits and drawbacks doing that? 5. What kind of things would increase your desire to work hard in school? Collaboration What it means and why it matters: Collaboration is the capacity to work with peers and adults to integrate into an environment and achieve objectives. Qualities that illustrate or contribute to collaboration include teamwork, cooperation, interpersonal skills, empathy, trust, a service orientation, negotiation, and a willingness to resolve conflict. 1. What is the best group you have ever been a part of, either inside or outside of school? What made being in the group a good experience for you? 2. What is the worst group you have ever been a part of, either inside or outside of school? What made being in the group a bad experience for you? 3. Do you think you are the type of person that others like to have in their group? Why or why not? 4. Can you think of a time when you really disagreed with someone but you found a way to handle that disagreement? What did you do to solve the problem? 5. If you were in a shipwreck and found yourself on a deserted island with ten strangers, what five rules would you create to help everyone get along? Conscientiousness What it means and why it matters: Conscientiousness is acting in a principled and responsible manner, and possessing an inner sense of what is right. Qualities that illustrate conscientiousness include possessing a work ethic, initiative, self-­‐direction, and a career orientation; showing a sense of responsibility, perseverance, productivity, grit, and self-­‐regulation; and acting in ways that reflect one’s ethics, integrity, and citizenship. 1. Tell me about the hardest decision you have ever made in your life. How did you decide what to do? 2. What does it mean to you to “do the right thing”? 3. Is there a person in your life who you can depend on to always do the right thing? Tell me why he or she behaves that way. 4. If you knew you could cheat on a test and absolutely would not get caught, would you do it? Why or why not? 5. If you were working on a project with other young people who didn’t work very hard, how would you handle the situation? Curiosity What it means and why it matters: Curiosity is a desire to learn or understand, both as a general orientation to life and to a specific topic or issue. Qualities that illustrate curiosity include being interested, seeking new ideas or activities, and openness to experiences. 1. If you could be the person who discovers the answer to one big question about the world today or in the past, what would that question be? 2. What is a subject that you would like to know more about? Why does that subject interest you? 3. Can you think of something that you thought you would never be interested in, but now you want to know more? What changed your mind? 4. Is there someone in your life who seems to want to know more about everything? In your opinion, is it a good thing to be that curious? 5. When you were in grade school, did you have books that you could not put down? What was so good about them, and do they still have that effect on you? Emotional Competence What it means and why it matters: Emotional competence is the capacity to experience and express feelings in ways that are appropriate and effective in a given situation as well the capacity to understand and sympathize with the feelings and experiences of others. Qualities that illustrate emotional competence include empathy, emotion management, self-­‐awareness, and social awareness. 1. Can you remember a time when you felt an emotion but you didn’t understand why you felt that way? 2. How much do you care about how other people are feeling? Are there some people whose feelings you care about more than others? 3. Tell me about a time when you were surprised at how someone felt about something? Why do you think you weren’t aware of how the other person was feeling? 4. How well do you manage feelings of anger and frustration? 5. Tell me about someone who you like to talk to when you are upset. What does this person do or say that makes you want to talk with him or her at those times? Help-­‐Seeking Behavior What it means and why it matters: Help-­‐seeking behavior is the capacity to monitor the need for assistance in school or in life and to proactively seek that help before problems develop. Qualities that illustrate help-­‐seeking behavior include an awareness of a problem, a willingness to express that a problem exists and a need for help, an ability to identify sources of help, and the willingness to seek help. 1. When you are worried about something, who can you talk to? 2. What kind of things do you need help with or advice? 3. Tell me about a time when you should have asked for help with something but you didn’t? Why didn’t you ask for help? 4. Think of a time when someone helped you solve a problem. Did you ask that person for help or did he or she offer it without being asked? 5. What would you say to a person who needs help but doesn’t want to ask for it? Optimism What it means and why it matters: Optimism is the capacity to be hopeful and confident about the future or the outcome of a process. Optimism is illustrated by qualities like looking forward, expecting positive results, and acting as if things will work out. 1. If you compare your life to a glass of water, would you say that the glass is half empty or half full? Why? 2. What is one thing that makes you optimistic about the future of the world or your community? 3. What is one thing that makes you pessimistic about the future of the world? 4. What do you want to be doing ten years from now? 5. Name a person who inspires you. Perseverance What it means and why it matters: Perseverance is the capacity to stick to a goal or complete a task despite difficulties. Perseverance is illustrated by qualities like grit, tenacity, delayed gratification, self-­‐
discipline, self-­‐control, and passion for long-­‐term goals. 1. Think of a task that you started but did not finish. What happened to stop your progress? 2. Think of an activity that required you to do lots of practice before you got good at it. Why did you stick to that task? 3. If you have a homework assignment that needs to get done but a friend wants you to do something fun, how do you decide what to do? 4. Who is a person in your life or a famous person you admire who never seems to give up on a goal? 5. Steve Jobs, the founder of the Apple technology company, once said, “I want to put a ding in the universe.” How do you think this attitude helped him be such a great inventor? Self-­‐Efficacy What it means and why it matters: Self-­‐efficacy is a person's belief in his or her ability to succeed in particular tasks and environments. Self-­‐efficacy is illustrated by qualities like confidence, perceived control, and high expectations. 1. Name an interest or goal that you are fairly confident that you can achieve. What makes you confident in this area? 2. Name a challenge that seems hard to achieve. What makes you think you probably can’t achieve your objective? 3. Name a time when you completed a task or achieved a goal that you didn’t think you could complete or achieve. Why were you able to succeed? 4. Why do you think it matters if a person believes he or she can achieve a goal? 5. Name a successful person who you admire. What personal qualities does this person seem to have that helps him or her reach goals? Self-­‐Regulation What it means and why it matters: Self-­‐regulation is the capacity to regulate thoughts, emotions, and behaviors to fit the situation and achieve goals. Self-­‐regulation is illustrated by qualities like self-­‐control, self-­‐direction, self-­‐evaluation, and self-­‐confidence. 1. How often do you plan ahead to accomplish what you need to do? 2. What type of school projects seem easier to complete? 3. Name someone who seems to be organized and on top of things. What does this person do to be organized? 4. What do you do if you’re in a situation where you can’t say what you really think or feel? 5. Name something that distracts you from your goals.