TECHNICAL STATS
WINE ID: Prem. Bordeaux
DATE BOTTLED:
7-Apr-14
CASES BOTTLED:
73
vineyard
2011 Malbec Kirk Vineyards
2011 Cabernet Sauvignon
Analytical #'s at bottling
RS:
pH:
TA:
ML:
SO2:
alcohol:
VA:
date
11/2/11
comments (brix/tons/etc.)
1.5625 tons @ 24.4 Brix and 3.6 pH
See 2011 Cabernet Sauvignon Tech Sheet
0.16
3.67
0.79
0.08
26 ppm free
15.44%
0.116
OTHER COMMENTS: 90% Kirk Malbec; 10% Cabernet Sauvignon
DESCRIPTION
Here we have a singularly rare bottle, both lourd & waxed, & otherwise filled with chocolate, toffee, &
candied plum; certainly pungent—un puro maduro echo a mano—with a grace-filled touch of pine tar &
camphor, & the misty schent of an aspen forest dripping in the Autumn, & luscious black, ripe fruit, &
perhaps just the tiniest whiff of fat, gammy boar roasting on a twirling spit. But why this, & why now?
Here is the true story of how this extraordinary wine came to be:
The day was November 28th, & the year was 2013, & I was giving general thanks to the beasties while
communing with my barrels down under ground. In play, & to amuse myself, I set about with an attempt
a bend or two. So into previously chalked as exceptional…ah, lovely! But then a serendipitous splash was
added to the glass from a certain cask of Cabernet I had also been eying, & with the first sniff over the
rim there arose an immediate joy-filled shout from the left nostril: “Omphaloskepsis! Omphaloskepsis!”
“Why this is too easy,” replied by right nostril. “Blending is always a trial & a task, but this! Just one
splash? Not possible…it can’t be that easy!”
So the blend was fashioned, as quick as quick can be, & the wine was given an appropriate rest during
which to meld & shape itself within the barrel’s tranquility, & once the fitting passage of time was up, I
approached the vessel cautiously, & then with a bit of trepidation, I eased out the bung.
“Indeed,” exclaimed the right-handed nostril lowering itself into the barrel’s bunghole. “Yes, yes & this
forsooth the omphalos, truly so, & I can clearly detect the scent of roots cracking hard rock & brittle,
chalky stone. Oh yes! It was thus that the way down was penetrated by the vine, & now the transmutation
is complete, for I can smell that swirling, mystical pneuma rises from Gaia’s deep moist cleft, that fruitful
cornucopia that bears every wondrous thing growing upon the living Earth, & oh! I can even hear naked
Pythia swooning and gibbering as she declares the fissure properly rembourré.
A bit hyperbolous, but you need to understand that the right handed orifice is driven by the grey organ’s
left hemisphere, & thus tends towards flights of verbosity sprinkled with elements of the rational, but as
soon as the right nostril paused to admire its skill at turning a descriptive phrase, its non-identical leftsided twin pushed its way past, & being all about emotion & sensuality, it cried out again & again & again
& again: “Omphaloskepsis! Omphaloskepsis!”
Excitement! Turmoil! A few minutes past during which the nervous vibrations settled towards calm, &
with knowing smile, & just a touch of condescension, both barrels of the nose turned to me & said: “So
go ahead, yes, go ahead & dribble that small drop from the bottle’s tip to honor Apollo, yes; & gaze down
at your navel in preparation, oh yes; but then cry out to a goat-footed Lacchos as you plant that quivering
tongue of yours deeply into the red riot of your cup, & while you drink remember that it’s only the
Sublime Beasties who really know how to dance.”
In perfect truth it was thus that on that fine Autumn’s day in the calm & dark quiet of our subterranean
cuvier that this our first Signature wine chose to announce itself, & in so doing, demanded the special
notoriety of its own limited bottling.
A grand total of 73 cases of this Signature Wine was bottled at 8:07 ante meridiem on 7 April 2014, & is
reserved exclusively for the highly esteemed members of the Elliptical Society.
Authored by John Munch