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7
CULTURE NOTE Boxing
Originating when someone raised fists to strike someone else, boxing has had a rich
and controversial history. First recognized with bare-knuckle bouts by the ancient
Greeks, boxing has become a celebrated but still largely unregulated sport worldwide.
The Greatest
SURF THE NET Known not only for
his excellence in boxing, Muhammed
Ali became famous for his good looks,
charisma, and political activism. Surf
the Internet to learn about Ali—born
Cassius Clay—and write a few
sentences summarizing your findings.
102
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The Importance of Editing
You’ve moved around, filled in, and shored up different patches of your
essay in Step 3 of the writing process, revising. Now you’re ready to polish
your work. Editing your writing is a painstaking, but very important, part
of the writing process. So don’t rush! It is during this stage of the writing
process that you address the fourth C, correct writing, and make your writing error-free.
Think of editing as the last mirror-check before going to an important
job interview. You wouldn’t show up to the interview—after carefully
preparing and dressing for success—with a piece of spinach between your
teeth. Similarly, you shouldn’t forget to edit your work after you’ve spent
much time and effort writing and revising it. Well-edited, error-free writing
shows your reader you care about your work. It makes you look smart, professional, and prepared.
Editing is changing your writing to make it more effective and to correct errors. There are two parts to editing.
1. Careful examination of your writing to see if you can make it smoother,
more interesting, and more effective
2. Careful proofreading to catch and correct errors in grammar, punctuation, and spelling
Notice that both steps begin with the word careful. Taking care at this
stage—to catch, delete, and correct errors—will go a long way toward making a good impression on your reader.
Editing for Smooth, Effective Writing
Once your essay is concise, credible, and clear, you need to make sure that
your reader will enjoy your writing. You want your audience to read all the
way to the end of the essay. That won’t happen unless your writing is interesting and progresses smoothly. As you read your essay, answer the following questions.
■ Pronoun and verb agreement and consistency. Do I use the same
pronoun throughout? If I start with you, for example, do I unexpectedly
switch to we? Do I use correct verb tenses throughout? (For more on
using consistent pronouns and verbs, see Chapters 40–43.)
■ Appropriate language. Do I use language that is appropriate for an
academic assignment? Is my language too casual or too formal? Do I
use unbiased, respectful language? (For more on word choice and sensitive language, see Chapters 11 and 13.)
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■ Word use. Have I chosen the best words I can? Are the words colorful,
precise, and interesting—or bland, vague, and boring? Is the writing too
wordy? Are certain words repeated too often? (For more on using vivid
examples and language, see Chapter 9.)
■ Sentence variety. Have I used different kinds of sentences to keep my
writing interesting? Have I made sure that each sentence flows logically
and smoothly into the next? (For more on sentence variety and connecting sentences, see Chapter 15.)
■ Punctuation and mechanics.Do I follow the rules of grammar? Are
my sentences punctuated correctly? Is my essay formatted properly?
(For more on punctuation and mechanics, study the chapters in Part 7
of this book.)
You address these concerns first during the drafting and revising
process. When you reach the editing stage of the writing process, you check
to make sure your sentences make sense all by themselves and that they logically connect with each other.
Proofreading for Sentence-Level Errors
You have changed your essay to make it smoother, more interesting, and
more effective. Now it’s time for proofreading—checking your writing for
errors in grammar, punctuation, and spelling. Proofreader’s marks, shown
on the following page, are a standard set of symbols used by instructors,
editors, and printers to show changes in written work. Become familiar
with these symbols, and use them as you proofread.
By now, you are so familiar with your essay that you probably skip right
over any errors without noticing them. That’s not surprising. When you use
the following three proofreading techniques, you force yourself to read
slowly. That way, you have a better chance of spotting mistakes.
Proofreading Sentence by Sentence Reading your essay one sentence at a time allows you to check for grammar errors such as run-on sentences, sentence fragments, and mistakes in subject-verb agreement and
pronoun agreement. It also helps you identify awkward sentences or word
choices and other grammar errors. Use a piece of paper to cover up all but
one sentence so that you can focus on that sentence alone.
The first pass can be difficult because many errors, not just the ones
you’re trying to correct at that point, are present. Nevertheless, concentrate
on finding the errors at the sentence level. Since you might be changing
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words during this step, you don’t want to bother correcting things before
you’re sure that you’ll keep them.
Proofreading Word by Word Slowing down and reading your essay
word by word will allow you to find other errors—such as apostrophe or
capitalization errors—that you didn’t change when reading each sentence
separately. Further, reading your paper aloud can help you listen to the
voice of your writing and determine whether you’ve repeated a word too
often or have used too many long words when you could do with shorter
ones. Use a pencil or your finger to point out each word as you read it.
Reading Your Work Backwards
Reading your essay backwards
helps you find spelling errors. Because your essay won’t make sense that
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way, you won’t be able to anticipate—and thus skip—the upcoming words
in a sentence. Because you must read every single word closely, this step is
very effective.
Using a Computer for Editing
Computers offer you many tools that can help you edit your work. These tools
can give you a false sense of security, though, so use them with caution.
■ The spelling checker will help you find spelling errors. It will not help
you find mistakes in word choice, however. For instance, the following
sentence makes no sense: “Were Shirley going to bee insight when the
mosque eaters or out.” The computer won’t catch any of the word
choice errors because all the words are spelled correctly. The correct
sentence should be “We’re surely going to be inside when the mosquitoes are out.”
■ Grammar checkers, too, can be helpful. However, they should be used
carefully as well. Sometimes a computer will point out an error but not
explain it. Other times the computer will be wrong. For instance, the
following sentence is correct: “If you keep writing in it, it may change
into something you like better.” However, the sentence originally ran
onto a second line. The grammar check marked the sentence wrong,
saying that the first word on the second line—in this case into—should
be capitalized. To be safe, do your own proofreading when you’ve
printed out your final draft.
Follow these guidelines to make the best use of your spelling and grammar
checkers.
1. Set the font on your computer to 12 point, which is large enough to
make finding errors easier.
2. Set the margins to at least one inch. (Check to see what your instructor
recommends.) Leaving yourself room to add questions or comments
will come in handy when you’re proofreading your draft.
3. Double-space your draft. Setting up your computer so that it automatically double-spaces the lines makes finding errors easier both on the
computer screen and on the paper when you print your draft out. Additionally, double spacing leaves you room to write comments on the
printed draft.
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Chapter 7 Editing: Checking for Correctness
4. Before you print out your draft, place the computer cursor (the blinking line that appears on the screen) at the very start of your document.
Read the line that the cursor is marking. Then, move the cursor down
a line using the arrow keys. Continue to use the cursor to focus your
attention on one line at a time, and make changes as you go rather than
changing everything at once.
EXERCISE 1 READING EACH SENTENCE SEPA R AT E LY
The following paragraph contains many sentence-level errors. Read the
paragraph and focus on finding errors in sentence structure and punctuation. In the blanks at the end of the paragraph, write the numbers of the
sentences that contain errors. Then, make corrections in the paragraph.
There are five errors in all.
A Sport with Some Punch
1Although boxing seems to be a sport executed by punching
,
someone. 2 Several
, diff e rent types of punches give the sport its
^
skill and strategy. 3The most important punch being the jab. 4The
^
jab is delivered with the hand of the foot which is forw a rd. 5A
right-handed fighter must throw the left hand toward the target
in a straight line from the chin. 6The second and most powerful
punch is the straight right (or left). The straight punch, also called
a “cross,” involves the hand going out in a straight line. 7However,
the straight punch requires weight transfer, which allows a more
p o w e rful hit and, unfort u n a t e l y, a split-second of being off balance after the punch. 8Uppercuts are the third type of punch;
they are used for fighting very close to an opponent (inside fighting). Tto deliver a left uppercut, the elbow dips towards the hips,
^
bringing
the head somewhat forw a rd and down before the fist
lands in the sternum (center of the chest). 9 A last import a n t
punch in boxing is the hook. 10The tricky hook is an inside power
punch. 11Which is initiated and delivered by an entire side of the
b o d y, causing the powerful but dangerous weight transfer.
1 2 While many boxers have a specialty punch, the best fighters
excel at all four types.
1
3
6
8
11
The sentences containing errors are _____, _____, _____, _____ and _____.
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EXERCISE 2 READ EACH WORD SEPA R AT E LY
In the following paragraph, look for errors in capitalization, apostrophes,
and redundancy. Then, correct the errors you find, and answer the questions at the end of the paragraph. Errors appear in five sentences.
The Greatest
1Many people strive to be successful in their given areas, but
very few succeed to the level where they can be considered “the
greatest.” 2Self-titled “the greatest,” heavyweight boxer Muhammed
Ali (born Cassius Clay) showed his greatness through his charisma,
religious faith, and boxing prowess. 3Breaking the boxers ’stereotype
as thugs or tough guys, Muhammed Ali was great as an ^intelligent,
articulate representative of his sport. 4With Alis’ good looks, impenetrable confidence, and glib lines (such as “I ^float like a butterfly,
sting like a bee”), Ali quickly became known for his “greatness” in
public speaking. 5A second way Ali showed his greatness was
through his religion. 6Joining the Black Muslims, Ali refused to be
drafted on religious grounds, and he was stripped of his title and
prohibited from Boxing. 7Though he angered many of his fans, he
showed his greatness by never backing down. 8Finally, Muhammed
Ali demonstrated his greatness as one of the best boxers’ of all time.
9With his quick jab and footwork, Ali was the only man to win the
world heavyweight title three times. 10 H his professional career
^
record was 56 wins, five losses, and 31 knockouts. 11In many ways,
Muhammed Ali was, as he claimed, the greatest.
4
6
8 and _____.
10
3
The sentences containing errors are _____,
_____,
_____,
_____
10
How many times is some form of the word great used? ______
What are some words or expressions the writer could use in place of
Answers will vary; best, top, first, premier
greatest? ____________________________________________________________
EXERCISE 3 READ THE PARAGRAPH BACKWA R D S
Read the following paragraph backwards, focusing on looking for spelling
errors. In the blanks after the paragraph, write the number of the sen-
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tences containing errors and the correct spellings of the words. There are
five errors in all.
Million-Dollar Movie
1In real life, the winners of boxing matches get all the atention;
people root for the champs and forget their opponents. 2 In the
movies, though, the brightest stars are sometimes the losers of
the big fight. 3Rocky Balboa, the fighter featured in the 1976 movie
Rocky, looses the least of the three movie fighters. 4Lucky enough
to get a shot at the championship, Rocky fights the match of his
life but still loses. 5However, he still wins respect and the girl
he loves. 6In the 1980 movie Raging Bull, boxer Jake La Motta has
greater wins than his Rocky counterpart, but he ends up losing
more, too. 7La Motta does become middleweight champion, but his
personal jelosy and violent nature eventually lead him to lose his
love and his freedom. 8Finally, the character who loses the most is
Maggie Fitzgerald, the aspiring woman boxer in the 2004 movie
Million Dollar Baby. 9Altho Maggie does distinguish herself as a
boxer, she not only loses the big fight, but she ends up losing her
mobility, her leg, and her life. 10Despite being the stars of their
films, Rocky Balboa, Jake La Motta, and Maggie Fitzgerald all experiance great loss.
3
9 and _____.
7
10
1
The sentences containing errors are _____,
_____,
_____,
_____
loses
jealousy
attention
The misspelled words are ____________,
____________,
____________,
experience
although
____________and
____________.
WRITING PRACTICE Write Your Own Essay
This chapter gave you some information on a sport you might not participate in yourself.
Your assignment is this: Write a few paragraphs or a short essay about a
sport that you would or would not like to play. You may have already tried the
sport, or you may have only thought about playing it. (If no sports interest
you, write about a physical activity—such as dance or hiking—that does.)
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Your thesis statement may be something like “The sport of GrecoRoman wrestling is fascinating because of the strategy and skill successful
players need to win their matches.”
Follow these steps to write your essay.
1. Use at least two prewriting techniques to come up with ideas for your
essay.
2. Use your notes from prewriting to write a rough draft of your essay.
3. Revise your essay, reading through it to check for the first three of the
four Cs: concise, credible, and clear writing.
4. Proofread your essay three times, looking for errors in for grammar,
punctuation, and spelling.
When you’re finished, your essay should include the following:
■ A clear thesis statement
■ Support points that relate to the thesis
■ Specific details that give proof of your thesis
■ Transition words that connect your support points and examples
Lab Activity 7
For additional practice with editing, complete Lab Activity 7 in the lab manual packaged with your textbook. If you did not receive a lab manual, you
can complete this activity online at www.ablongman.com/long. Click on
College Resources for Writers and then click on Activity 7.