SMAD, Rev. Eletrônica Saúde Mental Álcool Drog. 2017 Jan.-Mar.;13(1):4-12 Original Article DOI: 10.11606/issn.1806-6976.v13i1p4-12 www.eerp.usp.br/resmad “The chain has not broken, but opened a link between us”: the impact of maternal chemical dependency on the mother-child bond Vanessa Trindade1 Carolina Bunn Bartilotti2 This research aimed to identify the perception of five drug addict mothers of Florianópolis about the bond with their children before and during recovery. Data were collected in semistructured interviews and analyzed by Content Analysis technique. During the drug use period, the priority was focused on drug consumption, creating a gap between mothers and children. We concluded that mothers’ drug use causes significant consequences to the mother-child relationship, generates distance, weakens bonds and affects the exercise of maternal role. Thus, interventions of health professionals with these women should address aspects beyond the behavior of using drugs, including issues related to the role as mother and woman, in a social reality. Descriptors: Substance-Related Disorders; Maternity; Mother-Child Relations. 1 2 Psychologist. PhD, Professor, Universidade do Sul de Santa Catarina, Palhoça, SC, Brazil. Corresponding Author: Vanessa Trindade Universidade do Sul de Santa Catarina - Unisul Av. Pedra Branca, 25 - Cidade Universitária CEP: 88137-270, Palhoça, SC, Brasil E-mail: [email protected] Trindade V, Bartilotti CB. “Não quebrou a corrente, mas abriu um elo entre nós”: o impacto da dependência química materna sobre o vínculo mãe-filho Esta pesquisa objetivou identificar a percepção de cinco mães dependentes químicas da Grande Florianópolis acerca do vínculo com seus filhos, antes e durante a recuperação. Os dados foram coletados em entrevistas semiestruturadas e analisados pela técnica de Análise de Conteúdo. Constatou-se que no período de uso de drogas a prioridade esteve voltada a este consumo, gerando afastamento entre mães e filhos. Concluiu-se que o uso de drogas pelas mães traz consequências significativas à relação mãe-filho, gera afastamento, fragiliza vínculos e prejudica o exercício do papel materno. Assim, as intervenções dos profissionais da saúde com estas mulheres devem abordar aspectos para além do comportamento de usar drogas, abrangendo questões referentes ao papel como mãe e mulher, inseridas em uma realidade social. Descritores: Transtornos Relacionados ao Uso de Substâncias; Maternidade; Relações Mãe-Filho. “No quebró la corriente, pero abrió un eslabón entre nosotros”: el impacto de la dependencia química materna sobre el vínculo madre-hijo Esta pesquisa objetivó identificar la percepción de cinco madres dependientes químicas de la Grande Florianópolis acerca del vínculo con sus hijos, antes y durante la recuperación. Los datos fueron colectados en entrevistas semiestruturadas y analizados por la técnica de Análisis de Contenido. Se constató que en el período de uso de drogas la prioridad estuvo vuelta a este consumo, generando alejamiento entre madres e hijos. Se concluyó que el uso de drogas por las madres trae consecuencias significativas a la relación madre-hijo, genera alejamiento, debilita vínculos y perjudica el ejercicio del papel materno. Así, las intervenciones de los profesionales de la salud con estas mujeres deben abordar aspectos más allá del comportamiento de usar drogas, abarcando cuestiones referentes al papel como madre y mujer, inseridas en una realidad social. Descriptores: Trastornos Relacionados con Sustancias; Maternidad; Relaciones Madre-Hijo. Introduction negative, will register in their subjectivity forms and trends of dealing with society and perceive the world Modern society assigns the mother a key role around them(1). within the family and, in particular, in the education of The emotional bond established between mother children; so that her main maternal function is to be a and child is a process understood as gradual as “nourisher”(1). This role is represented by the support to it grows and solidifies after repeated positive and the child’s needs, such as hygiene, feeding, emotional pleasurable experiences. In this process occurs a kind bond, among others. The experiences children have of emotional feedback because as the mother applies in their relationship with their mother, both positive and an emotional investment to the child, this develops an www.eerp.usp.br/resmad 5 6 SMAD, Rev. Eletrônica Saúde Mental Álcool Drog. Jan.-Mar. 2017;13(1):4-12. attachment bond and nurtures it with respect to the developments in this family setting, there is still a long mother . Thus, the growth of emotional investment way with regard to equality between mother and father tends to be largely linked to growth of affection – and roles. (2) the quality of this relationship is crucial to children to Based on these, the woman is widely pressed create awareness of themselves and the way they will by society. In order to meet the expectations, behave in the world and in relationships. especially in relation to maternal role, woman must Given the importance of the maternal role, have emotional availability and unconditional love to contemporary society requires that the mother has her child. However, some conditions may hinder this an unconditional love for her children provide them configuration, such as chemical dependency, an issue attention and care as much as possible. Thus, it is that, along with maternity is central in this research. expected that the child is her highest priority, greatest Chemical dependency is defined as a mental source of love and affection. A few decades ago it was disorder characterized by a “set of behavioral, common that the only roles assigned to women were cognitive and physiological phenomena that develop being mother and housewife after repeated consumption of a psychoactive (3). Progressively, with the spaces and rights women substance”(6). This disorder affects about 27 million conquered, as their participation in the public people worldwide. About more than 20,000 people die sphere, entering the labor market and consequent each year from drug-related problems(7). financial independence, woman-mother reality Chemical dependency can cause many has been changing . Today’s woman has often consequences to the user’s life the same away people delayed motherhood for professional and academic make up their relationships, because drug use, often achievements. However, it is still common people react becomes priority in the dependent’s life and, in order strangely when a woman says she does not want to be to be devote to the use, other roles and functions are a mother and then try to persuade her with speeches discarded. Some of these roles can be of fundamental about the completion and fulfillment of women in and importance, such as labor activities that provide the motherhood(3). Meaning that even with the spaces won livelihood and paternal and maternal functions that by the modern woman, her association with maternal support the growth of the children and are constituents role is still present. of their personalities. (3) The woman-mother transition to other roles However, one should not reduce chemical and spaces has been gradual and difficult, such as dependency to its symptoms and its psychopathological women’s stress in the reconciliation of so many dimension. The professional performance must functions. Working outside the house is a dimension comprise the subject fully and systemically(8); which added to the already existing(4), so that the woman means considering the biological, psychological and remains the primary responsibility for housework and sociological dimensions of each person, just as the care for children, but now she is also in the labor market social, historical and cultural context in which each and contributes financially to support the family. operates. has National and global data point out that the number shared these household chores, which also indicates By contrast, in some familiar contexts, man of women in chemical dependency is still substantially a transition process where the father suits a new less than the number of dependent men(6,9). However, requirement of modern society and is increasingly fewer women in this condition should not pose less involved in tasks which are beyond the labor market . of a concern with the subject, since the consumption This division brings some balance between the of psychoactive substances among these has been father and mother roles; however, when division of growing over the years(6,9). Thus, the difference of drug responsibilities exists, it is still common to hear that use by women and men has gradually narrowed. (5) the man is “helping” the woman in the care of children With regard to drug effects and consequences, and in the organization of the house. This ultimately there is evidence that damage reach a greater extent gives the idea that the task originally belongs to the of the female population. The female physiological woman, so the man is helping, commonly giving the structure favors an increased absorption of alcohol in man the status of generous, good husband and father. the blood, even when men consume the same amount This indicates that, despite having already been some of the substance. For this reason, alcohol addiction www.eerp.usp.br/resmad 7 Trindade V, Bartilotti CB. as well as physical problems resulting from this use, Method including risk of mortality, grows more rapidly in This research is qualitative, exploratory and cross- women(10). In a survey of chemically dependent women, they sectional. It is characterized as a case study, since the had difficulty expressing the meanings of their social reports of the participants were broadly and in depth roles, so they could not talk about how they perceive studied(12). themselves and how they perceived to be seen. When The participants in this study were five asked about the positive and negative aspects in women who were attending mutual help groups in their roles as mother, woman, wife and worker, “few Florianópolis. In the period surveyed, three were were able to put into words the roles they played, [...] attending Narcotics Anonymous group (NA) and two, talking about their aggressiveness, lack of child care, the Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). The criterion to select when under the chemical effect”(11), indicating that the the participants was in accordance with the voluntary distancing of oneself and others, just as the loss or demonstration when invited to participate and after disregard of their identity are common in addiction. met the following inclusion criteria: age over 18 years Considering the data presented so far, this study and have at least one child aged 4 to 17 years who approaches a reality more and more present in followed their drug use period during early childhood. modern society, where the woman takes, carries and The limits of this age group for children are reconciles various roles and functions, as a mother, due to two reasons: at four, the child has passed wife and housewife. Parallel to this, household chores the early childhood; when the levels of awareness are no longer enough to society, so that the woman and verbalization become more accurate. At 17, also happens to be pressed into the labor market and the adolescent is still legally under the parents’ building a career. With the progressive increase of responsibility; which requires them greater involvement drug use among women, fulfilling all that is expected in the creation and care for children. Table 1 shows of their roles can become an even more difficult task. the women who participated in the study. In order to Thus, the objective of this research was to identify the preserve the confidentiality of these women, their real perception of chemically dependent mothers about names were changed by biblical names, following the their mother-child bond during the period of drug use saying that “mother is sacred.” and period of recovery. Table 1 - Characteristics of participants. Florianópolis, SC, Brazil, 2015 Name Age Isabel Miriam Ana Sarah Noemi 51 years-old 32 years-old 40 years-old 42 years-old 40 years-old Graduate course Education College degree Basic education High school College degree incomplete Children's age 29, 22, 18 and 5 years-old 12, 10, 9 and 7 years-old 13 years-old 17 years-old 13 years-old Time attending the mutual help group Alcoholics Anonymous – 2 years Narcotics Anonymous – 4 months Narcotics Anonymous – 5 years Alcoholics Anonymous – 3 months Narcotics Anonymous – 1 year and 5 months Used drugs Alcohol Alcohol, cocaine and LSD Alcohol and cocaine Alcohol, cannabis, solvent, ether, shoe glue and cocaine. Alcohol, cannabis and cocaine Period of drug use 13 years 7 years 8 years 25 years 19 years We contacted the coordinators of the mutual help mutual help groups. Three calls occurred in person group AA and NA, whose phones are available on and two by phone, through indication of other group their official websites, in order to show the research, members. their objectives and schedule the best day for a visit. Data collection was carried out individually, from In order to meet women within the desired profile and semi-structured interviews, which lasted approximately to invite them to participate, a visit was made to 10 50 minutes. Three interviews occurred in the rooms of www.eerp.usp.br/resmad 8 SMAD, Rev. Eletrônica Saúde Mental Álcool Drog. Jan.-Mar. 2017;13(1):4-12. mutual help groups attended by each participant and term for audio recording. After the interviews, data two happened in the homes of participants. The guide were fully transcribed, then organized into categories consisted of 22 questions that addressed aspects and analyzed using Content Analysis technique(13). related to the mother-child bond, characteristics Through the full reading of the interviews between mother-child relationship, including drug transcription, there was a significant difference consequences to this relationship and the maternal between behavior and feelings present during drug role characterization of the interviewees. use and during recovery. The negative aspects of the Each question in this guide was made in order relationship were concentrated during the period of to obtain an overall understanding of every aspect drug use and positive aspects in the recovery period. investigated. Thus, it was questioned how a particular During drug use, behaviors and positive feelings were aspect of the relationship occurred during the drug use absent or, if present, they lost in terms of quality, period and how it happened in the recovery period, as had been associated with feelings such as pity, how each interviewed perceived these changes and fear and shame. Then, categories to evidence this what were the feelings in each reported time. Apart contrast was considered, in order to categorize what from concrete experiences, the issues sought to was present in the interviewees’ discourse, namely: encourage the expression of meaning and feeling of positive affections, negative affections and dialogue the interviewees in each step. with the children. This by the study was Research assessed Ethics and approved Committee of the Results and discussion University of Southern Santa Catarina, CAAE: 19174713.1.0000.5369 and Opinion 357.197. Before To analyze the mother-child bond during the drug the interview, each participant signed the Free and use period and recovery period, three categories were Clarified Consent Term (FCCT) and the authorization then defined, as shown in Table 2. Table 2 - Categories, period and frequency of relevant responses to the main theme. Florianópolis, SC, Brazil, 2015. Categories Positive affection Negative affection Existence of dialog In the Positive Period Freq. Participants In drug use In recovery In drug use In recovery In drug use In recovery 04 05 04 02 00 05 Isabel, Miriam, Ana and Sarah Isabel; Miriam; Ana and Noemi Isabel; Miriam; Ana and Noemi Ana and Noemi No occurrence Isabel; Miriam; Ana and Noemi affection which enough, I cuddle. We’re always talking about things I did not say investigated the presence of positive feelings of the category, before, like ‘I love you’. I say good morning, sometimes I say: ‘you mother towards the children, this affection was present are the most important thing in my life’. These things I did not speak, in the speech of four respondents. In drug use, it was I was not a loving mother. I even did love, but I did not show it possible to show that, despite a positive consideration (ISABEL). at times, this affection was associated with feelings In this sense, it was found that although most such as fear of not being able to effectively meet mothers nurture positive feelings towards the children, emergency and daily needs of the child, feelings in both periods, during drug use such feelings were of shame, just as fear for the child for see her in a not reflected in their actions. Mothers worried about vulnerable situation: I pitied them because even using drugs their children, they did not stopped using drugs for and being insane, I had a few moments of lucidity. I did not remember this reason though, to solve the situations that caused if they had eaten, if they had lunch (MIRIAM). concern; they had lost control over their chemical In the recovery category, positive affection was dependency. In recovery, the affection happened associated with the affection between mother and through active positions towards the children, because child and inherent responsibility to the maternal role, in this condition they felt more capable to convey to demonstrating the actual construction of emotional the children positive feelings. bonds, as can be seen in Isabel’s story: Today I kiss www.eerp.usp.br/resmad 9 Trindade V, Bartilotti CB. Exchanges of positive affections between mother and child are crucial for structuring important aspects finding some feelings yet. It’s been only 1 year and 5 months that I am at NA, I have not figured out any feeling yet (NOEMI). of child development. It is from an atmosphere The negative affection identified in the interviewees’ of affection and protection at home that the child speech was one of the aspects found in a survey of six develops the necessary security to relate to the social Colombian chemically dependent mothers(17). During environment . The consequences of the quality of drug consumption period, the mothers understood these interactions, whether positive or negative, will the maternal role as “difficult, hard and nasty” and the follow them until their adult life, setting trends as how task to take care of the children was taken or shared the will behave in relationship with others. with other family members(17), this aspect was also (14-15) The positive affection on families facing drug identified in this research. addiction, however, as found in this study, is not The results for the existence of negative affection common: “most of the time, the children [of drug during drug use period are confirmed by authors addicts] suffer from a negative family interaction and an who observe that negative family interactions are impoverishment in solving problems” ; these families associated with drug use by the child’s parents, which are seen as dysfunctional and the consequences of permeates the family atmosphere by “low sensitivity this lack of positive aspects are reflected in the child’s and negative affection, less verbalization and low development. responsiveness to the child”(18). In this sense, we (16) In a survey conducted with 54 children of found that the negative affection experienced by the alcoholics, 94.4% had feelings of inferiority and interviewees is a constant for chemical dependency inhibition, and 88.9% had affective deficiency . and was associated with the priority that the drugs had Thus, it is important to pay attention to the affective won in the mothers’ lives. Thus, any person or activity pattern that these children are developing, because that would jeopardize this priority and would take time the tendency is that when they build their own families, that could be invested in drug use was understood as they reproduce this lack of affection, creating a vicious a barrier and causer of irritability, which did not happen circle(14). so often in the recovery phase. (16) In the Negative affection category, which Regarding the first two categories, Positive investigated the existence of negative feelings about affection and Negative affection, it is important to the children. In the drug use period, four mothers highlight the participation of the interviewed Noemi. claimed to have realized this kind of affection. In this As for the feelings that this mother has for the child, period, the negative affection was in most part related at first, when asked, the interviewee claimed to have to mothers’ irritability to have to provide some kind of positive feelings about her daughter, which was care or attention to the child instead of being able to deconstructed after. It could be observed that the first devote that time to substance use, as shown by the Noemi’s response was possibly associated with social Isabel’s speech: values, so that she tried to bring a socially accepted The things I remember is that sometimes I got irritated because I had to pay attention to him instead of drinking. better answer: (ISABEL). very affectionate, very loved. She was very loved. I never had any I always loved her very much. She was always In Noemi’s story, negative affection happens other feeling; I always loved her too much. (NOEMI – First answer as since pregnancy, because this mother had to give up to her feelings towards her daughter). I think I only felt guilt for her, the drugs in favor of her daughter, resulting, in her it was not even love. I just felt guilt for her. Today I still feel guilty and perception, rejection of pregnancy: I was enjoying, I was I’ll tell you a very sincere thing, I understood her as a very strange dating the drug, I had just got into cocaine. I had a very complicated person. She was a stranger to me (NOEMI - Second answer as to pregnancy, I had a lot of nausea, almost had a miscarriage. Man, her feelings towards her daughter). I had nausea until the end. Total rejection of pregnancy (NOEMI). Motherhood tends to be experienced as the In recovery, the negative affection was observed decisive factor in the recognition of women as only in the story of two mothers. While Ana individual, as a social being(19). In this direction, “being experienced this affection “for not knowing how to deal a mother today is not so simple; refusing to be so is with situations”(sic), Noemi demonstrates difficulty to even harder”(19). Thus, it is socially expected that the develop positive feelings about her daughter, there is woman embraces the maternal role and experiences room only for the guilt: this moment as unique and special in her life. www.eerp.usp.br/resmad Today I still feel guilty. [...] I’ve been 10 SMAD, Rev. Eletrônica Saúde Mental Álcool Drog. Jan.-Mar. 2017;13(1):4-12. The woman who shows no desire to become a mother is usually estrangement target, questioning me more attention when I talk, he looks at me and there is a greater complicity (SARA). and attempts at persuasion , meaning that the From communication with the mother, children woman in today’s society has no space to express or give meanings to themselves and to the world even build her own desires related to maternity that around them, and this interaction it fundamental are contrary to what the society expected. for the continuity of their development. It is from (3) When it is stated that “the values of a society communication that the child organizes the thoughts, are often so compelling that they give an incalculable perceptions and develops structure as a subject(21). In weight on our desires”(20), it points to the difficulty this sense, considering that the mother tends to be in building desires that are incompatible with the the main reference for the child, especially during their society. This ambivalence of wishes was present first years of life, it is important that she is available at Noemi’s story, although she mentioned she has to introduce the world to the child and deal with their planned to have her daughter, when she learned she anxieties and concerns, through the guiding and was pregnant she realized the consequences of this training character in communication. condition (which included stop the “dating”(sic) this It was found that drug use stage was filled by mother was establishing with the drug) and realized distance between mothers and children of different that, in fact, never wanted to be a mother. orders, and dialogue is one of the most affected As a result of these social values, the woman aspects of the lives of these families. The loss of who does not feel what socially is expected before dialogue quality caused by chemical dependency motherhood tends to feel guilty and frustrated is a consensus among the literature, because because she realizes that failed in her role as a the chemically dependent is with their priorities woman, by not being able to desire the pregnancy or aimed at drug use, creating greater isolation and, not unconditionally love her child . From this, one therefore, reducing the possibility of dialogue. When should reflect on the motherhood “social rule”: it is communication occurs, it tends to be confrontational socially established that every woman must become because the family environment is fragile and a mother and it is from this maternal role that she will mobilized(22). (19) feel complete and fulfilled. Maybe it is easier to follow the rule that is accepted than reject it and face conflicts and social criticism. Thus, this mother, at first, did not feel comfortable to expose a feeling contrary to what is socially expected of the maternal role. In the Existence of dialog category, in the drug use period, none of the respondents acknowledged a dialogue existence with their children, considering that chemical dependency brings serious damage to family interaction: I could not talk before. It was the basics, putting clothes on, eating, and sleeping. The time I liked better was when he slept (ISABEL). The opposite occurred in the Recovery period, where all five interviewees perceived the existence of dialogue between them and their children. The quality of this interaction varies among respondents, which is understood as natural, since the experiences of each family before chemical dependency, just as the time each person needs to be able to re-establish bonds, are unique, as noted in some of their speeches: [I talk to my daughter] very, very, very much. About several subjects. At the moment we are talking about dating because she is getting interested in it (ANA). I cannot get closer to him yet, I think I’m still at the early stage in the recovery process, but I see that he gives Final considerations This research investigated the impact of drug use on the mother-child bond. We observed that motherhood plays an important and special role for most mothers; however, during the period of drug use, the priority was directed to substance use and motherhood was left in second place at different times. During drug use, the love felt by mothers was not reflected in their actions, so affection, dialogue and social relations were, among others, aspects sometimes overlooked, which distanced them from what is socially expected from motherhood. Drug use period caused a global distance between mothers and their children in all aspects investigated. The bonds were significantly weakened. In recovery, these mothers have tried to rebuild their relationship with their children and many behaviors related to provision of support, dialogue and transmission of love are being reinserted in their family relationships. However, this bond reconstruction has happened with more difficulty in some cases and some mothers www.eerp.usp.br/resmad Trindade V, Bartilotti CB. still cannot get closer to their children; a situation in 4. Borsa JC, Feil CF. O papel da mulher no contexto which a professional intervention could facilitate. Also, familiar: uma breve reflexão. Portal dos Psicólogos. another point which proved possible to intervention 2008;185:1-12. was resistance, especially Noemi, by expressing 5. Wagner A, Predebon J, Mosmann C, Verza F. the real feelings she had in relation to her daughter; Compartilhar tarefas? Papéis e funções de pai e mãe because they are incompatible with what is socially na família contemporânea. 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