DRAMA AUDITION MONOLOGUE 1
MALE from the play, ‘ITHACA ROAD’ by Robert Kronk
(Dramatic Context: Tilly and Ben are twins about to leave their remote property to go to boarding school in town.
Tilly is eagerly anticipating a new life with new friends and possibilities, while Ben is not so sure…… The play is
about young people in transition from primary to high school, from small community to big town, from home to
boarding school.)
Ben is telling his twin sister Tilly what boarding school will actually be like.
BEN: I’ll stride into school. [Breathy girl’s voice.] Oh my God, who’s that cool guy going to our brother school? I so
want to get with him. [As BEN] Form a line ladies. [A bully’s voice.] Hey new kid, prepare to be bullied. [BEN] Sorry,
what was that? I couldn’t hear you for the sound of your head getting flushed. [BULLY] Whaddya talking about my
head’s not getting …. Ahhhh.
[Impressed.] Oh wow, you just like totally toileted the toughest kid in the school. You wanna be in the football team?
[Ben] Depends, we got cheerleaders? [HOT CHEELEADERS] Yeah. [BEN] Okay then.
So yeah… that’s what... you know. What it’s going to be like… at school, sort of like that. (pause) I’ll get my own
room, with a wide-screen TV. And they’ll play whatever shows I want to watch. It’ll be non-stop extreme survival
programs: Man Vs Wild 24/7. [Switching to Bear Gryll’s voice.] And after learning how to do it I’m going to live off the
land. I’ll rip the heads off snakes and eat ‘em raw. And catch a skunk [BEN makes a skunk noise] and eat that too.
(It takes BEN a moment for this to sink in. Realising, he pauses and says)
BEN: Okay, maybe not just like that.
DRAMA AUDITION MONOLOGUE 2
MALE from the play, ‘TWO WEEKS WITH THE QUEEN’ By Mary Morris
& Morris Gleitzman
(DRAMATIC CONTEXT: Colin is on a plane waiting for it to take off. He is on his way to England to stay with his
Aunt & Uncle whilst his little brother Luke undergoes treatment for cancer. Colin is seated, ready for take-off.)
COLIN: Lifejackets! Great. You think we better get ours out? (pause) You’d be right. In the water, I mean. (pause)
Got enough fat on you to keep you warm. I’d be a gonner. (The noise rises in pitch as the plane starts to take off)
Woa, some speed eh? (pause) Did you know that most plane crashes happen on take off? (They lean back as the
plane takes off.) (Looks down at the world below) Hey, there’s Sydney Harbour Bridge. Isn’t it beautiful? My
brother’s in Sydney, in hospital. You reckon they’re all lookin’ up at us while we’re lookin’ down? I bet him and all the
Nurses are lookin’ out the hospital window at us. Wave, go on, just in case. I bet he’s ropable, he only got to go in
the air ambulance, I’m in a jumbo. Boo sucks Lukey mate! Up in the cockpit you should see the equipment and all
the dials and lights and everything. Here we are, in a plane bigger than Myers up in the air sixty thousand feet over
Dubrovnik; if modern technology can do this, it can cure cancer standing on its head. What do you reckon?
(Time passes)
COLIN: And then Arnie Strachan told me that when his Uncle died they put his ashes in a box and sent them to rellies
in England. Only, they put him in the same parcel as things to put in the Christmas cake, so the rellies thought his
Uncle’s ashes was some new kind of spices and they put him in the Christmas cake, ‘cos they sent the letter separate,
see, and the letter didn’t get there until after the cake was made. And the letter said his Uncle wanted to be buried
at sea, so they took the cake out on the ferry and chucked bits of it in the water, only the seagulls kept swooping and
carrying bits of him off.