INITIATING CONVERSATIONS WITH A PARENT
Source: The instructional sequence is adapted from the “Giving Your Parents ‘The Talk’” lesson plan by Teen Talk: Sexuality Education. The “Getting
the Conversation Started” handout is a compilation of various suggestions from the lesson plan. The “Back in the Day” handout is only slightly
modified from the original resource. http://www.teentalkca.org/parent-communication-lessons/ http://www.teentalkca.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Back-In-the-Day-Homework-20121.pdf
GRADES 6th-9th
PRE-LESSON ACTIVITIES
Time: 25-30 minutes
Purpose:
Today, we will learn about how to talk to your parent(s)/guardian(s)
about uncomfortable topics such as dating, relationships, and sex.
Objective:
• Students will brainstorm different ways they can begin
uncomfortable conversations with their parent(s)/guardian(s).
• Students will understand the importance of effective
communication.
Icebreaker:
Write the following sentence stems on the board/overhead projector,
and ask students to complete them. Invite students to share answers.
• I would describe my relationship with my parent(s)/guardian(s)
as…
• When I have a problem, the first person I talk to is…
• Parent(s)/guardian(s) should always…
Materials Needed:
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•
•
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Flipchart paper
Markers
Class set of “Getting the Conversation Started” Handout
Class set of “Back in the Day” Handout
Defining Words:
Effective Communication: exchanging information purposefully in order to achieve a
mutually desired result.
PARENT-CHILD COMMUNICATION
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PARENT-CHILD COMMUNICATION
INITIATING CONVERSATION WITH A PARENT/GUARDIAN
LESSON ACTIVITIES
Instructional Sequence:
1) Pose initial question to students:
• Raise your hand if you feel comfortable going to your parent(s)/guardian(s) for help when you have a problem.
• Keep your hand raised if you feel comfortable talking to your parent(s)/guardian(s) about dating and relationships.
• Finally, keep your hand raised if you have ever talked to your parent(s)/guardian(s) about dating or sex before.
*You might need to modify exact word choice depending on students’ responses.
2) Explain to students that effective communication with parents creates safe and strong family relationships. Even though
talking about dating, puberty, and sex can be awkward and uncomfortable, our parent(s)/guardian(s) can be a valuable
resource.
3) Initial Exercise:
• Have students brainstorm reasons why they might find it difficult to talk to their parent(s)/guardian(s) about sex. Record their responses on
flipchart paper.
Possible answers might be:
o It’s embarrassing.
o They might think you are having sex.
o They will get mad at you.
o They are too busy to have a conversation.
o You don’t want them to know you are having sex (if you are).
• Have students brainstorm possible solutions for their answers to the previous exercise. Record these on a second piece of flipchart paper.
Possible solutions may include:
o Write your questions, feelings, or desire to talk in a letter instead of asking in person.
o Use something you saw on TV or in a movie as a starting point.
o Remind them that you are just asking questions – you want to be informed.
o Wait for a time when they are calm and not busy.
o Tell them ahead of time that you need some time to talk about something important.
4) Pass out the “Getting the Conversation Started” handout.
• Students will practice different phrases/techniques for having uncomfortable conversations with their parent(s)/guardian(s).
• Have students work in pairs and use handout to role-play different scenarios.
• Observe students carrying out role-plays. Move around the room and offer suggestions as needed to help facilitate more effective
conversations.
5) Pass out the “Back in the Day Homework Assignment” handout.
• Instruct students that, for this assignment, they are to interview their parent(s)/guardian(s) about their experiences with sex education and
relationships when they were teenagers.
Closing Summary:
Emphasize the importance of effective communication with a parent/guardian or trusted adult. Remind students to use their tips worksheet
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as a reference when initiating a conversation.
PARENT-CHILD COMMUNICATION
INITIATING CONVERSATION WITH A PARENT/GUARDIAN
Getting the Conversation Started Handout
Things You Might Do:
• Find a time when your parent(s)/guardian(s) is/are not distracted or busy. It might be helpful to tell them ahead of time that you want to
have a conversation.
SUGGESTION: Make a date, set a time, and put it on your calendar.
• Think about an activity that you really enjoy doing with your parent(s)/guardian(s). Participating in a fun activity can relieve some of the
anxiety and stress of having an uncomfortable conversation.
SUGGESTION: cooking, watching a movie, playing a game, exercising, or shopping.
• Give your parent(s)/guardian(s) the handout “Back in the Day”, and have them complete it. When they are finished, you can discuss their
answers and use them as a starting point for your own discussion.
Phrases You Might Use:
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•
•
•
•
“Hey Dad, I would like more information about…”
“Mom, can you tell me more about…”
“I have some questions I’d like to ask you about sex. It doesn’t mean I’m having sex; I just want to talk to you about it.”
“I saw this scene in a movie, and I was wondering what you thought of it.”
“We’ve been talking about __________ in school, and I was just wondering how you feel about this.”
“Hey Grandma, I love that we can talk about anything. Do you think you could answer some of my questions about sex?”
Just Remember:
• Be honest. Being completely open will help you develop trust and have confidence in asking your parent(s)/guardian(s) questions in the
future.
• Start out with some of your easier questions to get conversation flowing, and then ask your harder questions.
• It’s okay to feel nervous. Your parent(s)/guardian(s) are probably nervous, too!
• Be a good listener, too. You probably have a lot of questions, but remember to listen to your parent(s)’/guardian(s)’ answers.
• Don’t be discouraged if your first conversation doesn’t go perfectly. Effective communication is not a science, and developing comfort and
ease when talking about sex takes time. Keep trying!
• If your parent(s)/guardian(s) starts to lecture or yell, gently remind them that you’re just asking questions.
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PARENT-CHILD COMMUNICATION
INITIATING CONVERSATION WITH A PARENT/GUARDIAN
Name: ____________________________________________ Date: ______________
Back in the Day Homework Assignment
Directions: For this assignment, you will be interviewing your parent(s)/guardian(s) about their experiences with sex education and relationships
when they were your age. Ask your parent(s)/guardian(s) each question, and then record their responses in the space provided.
1) What did you do in your free time when you were my age?
2) What did you want to become when you grew up?
3) What was your relationship like with your parent(s)/guardian(s)?
4) What did your parent(s)/guardian(s) teach you about puberty and body changes?
5) Did you have sex education or family life education in school?
6) How old were you when you fell in love?
7) What age do you think is the right age to have sex?
8) At what age do you think it would be best for me to get married? Have kids?
9) What do you want me to know about men/women?
Parent/Guardian’s Signature: ___________________________________
Date: ________________
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