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Three Keys for Overcoming
Resistance to Change
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©2017 True North Partnering Peter Vajda, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
[email protected] www.truenorthpartnering.com 770-804-9125
Two major challenges that accompany change:
1. ________________________________
2. ________________________________
Two types of tension change produces:
1. H___________________________
2. U___________________________
Three takeaways:
1. Pay attention to the R________ C_________ if you want
to understand the resistance.
2. People's three greatest needs are: C_____________
R__________________ and S________________.
3. Experience an event as F________.
Some common tactics used to deal with resistance to change:
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
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©2017 True North Partnering Peter Vajda, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
[email protected] www.truenorthpartnering.com 770-804-9125
Some common signs of resistance to change:
_____________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________
Resistance to change affects:
M___________________
P___________________
P___________________
P___________________
S___________________
The Root Cause of resistance is: __ __ __ __
Three reasons why people resist change: fear of losing
1.______________________
2.______________________
3.______________________
What triggers fear is P__ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __.
Perception determines R __ __ __ __ __ __.
The three neuronal components of resistance are the:
1. T __ __ __ __ __ __
2. E __ __ __ __ __ __
3. P __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ R __ __ __ __ __ __ __.
Neurons that __ __ __ __ together, __ __ __ __ together.
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©2017 True North Partnering Peter Vajda, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
[email protected] www.truenorthpartnering.com 770-804-9125
Some of our early programmers are:
________________________
________________________
________________________
________________________
________________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
The fear response includes behaviors that exhibit:
flight:
__________________________________________________
______________________________________________ ____
fight:
__________________________________________________
__________________________________________________
freeze:
__________________________________________________
__________________________________________________
Three areas of the brain:
Practices to acclimate to change:
________________________________________
________________________________________
________________________________________
________________________________________
Four tasks that will help you adapt to change:
Do something ______________________________
Do something ______________________________
Do something ______________________________
Do something ______________________________
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©2017 True North Partnering Peter Vajda, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
[email protected] www.truenorthpartnering.com 770-804-9125
Three Keys to
Overcoming Resistance to Change
At-home practice/exercise
Whenever you are feeling alienated from yourself and others (or otherwise experiencing a negative emotion you don't
understand), this list may help you pinpoint your feeling, and thus make it easier to express. Even just being able to identify
your feelings is a powerful step in regaining a sense of control and centeredness. .Read and become familiar with these.
HAPPY
SAD
ANGRY
Acknowledged
Admired
Alive
Appreciated
Assured
Cheerful
Confident
Content
Delighted
Determined
Ecstatic
Elated
Encouraged
Energized
Enthusiastic
Excited
Exuberant
Flattered
Fortunate
Fulfilled
Glad
Grateful
Gratified
Hopeful
Joyful
Jubilant
Justified
Loved
Loving
Marvelous
Optimistic
Peaceful
Pleased
Proud
Relaxed
Relieved
Resolved
Respected
Satisfied
Terrific
Thrilled
Tranquil
Understood
Valued
Alienated
Ashamed
Burdened
Condemned
Crushed
Defeated
Dejected
Demoralized
Depressed
Deserted
Despised
Devastated
Disappointed
Discarded
Discouraged
Disgraced
Disheartened
Disillusioned
Dismal
Distant
Distraught
Distressed
Drained
Empty
Exhausted
Grievous
Helpless
Hopeless
Inadequate
Isolated
Lonely
Miserable
Mournful
Neglected
Pitiful
Regretful
Rejected
Humbled
Resigned
Sorrowful
Terrible
Unappreciated
Uncared For
Unloved
Unwanted
Upset
Wounded
Abused
Aggravated
Agitated
Anguished
Annoyed
Betrayed
Bored
Cheated
Coerced
Controlled
Deceived
Disgusted
Displeased
Dominated
Enraged
Exasperated
Exploited
Frustrated
Fuming
Furious
Harassed
Hateful
Hostile
Humiliated
Incensed
Irritated
Mad
Offended
Outraged
Patronized
Peeved
Perturbed
Pissed Off
Provoked
Rebellious
Repulsed
Resentful
Ridiculed
- Sabotaged
Seething
Smothered
Spiteful
Stifled
Strangled
Suppressed
Throttled
Uptight
Used
Vengeful
Vindictive
SCARED
CONFUSED
Afraid
Anxious
Appalled
Awed
Concerned
Defensive
Insecure
Desperate
Doubtful
Dread-full
Fearful
Panicky
Frantic
Guarded
Helpless
Constricted
Disabled
Horrified
Inpatient
Intimidated
Nervous
Overwhelmed
Perplexed
Petrified
Reluctant
Shaken
Shocked
Shy
Skeptical
Apprehensive
Suspicious
Alarmed
Startled
Stunned
Swamped
Tense
Terrified
Threatened
Uneasy
Timid
Tormented
Unsure
Vulnerable
Ambivalent
Awkward
Baffled
Bothered
Bewildered
Constricted
Directionless
Stagnant
Disorganized
Distracted
Doubtful
Flustered
Foggy
Hesitant
Immobilized
Misunderstood
Perplexed
Puzzled
Surprised
Torn
Trapped
Troubled
Uncertain
Uncomfortable
Undecided
Unsettled
Unsure
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©2017 True North Partnering Peter Vajda, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
[email protected] www.truenorthpartnering.com 770-804-9125
List of Physiological Sensations
Every emoting is expressed as a physiological sensation in the body (emotions are never in the mind.) Just as
you know you're getting a cold by what you sense/experience in your body, so, too, you can tell what's going on
with you emotionally by sensing your body. Here are some common physiological sensations that reflect
emotions. Read these and become familiar with them. .
Heart rate – fast, slow
Breath – slow, long, relaxed, fast, short; coming from throat, chest, lower belly
Eyes – relaxed, tense, hard, soft, clear vision, blurred vision, cool, warm, hot, vigilant
Skin – warm, hot, cold, clammy, neutral
Body – peaceful, calm, relaxed, quiet, alive, energized, painful, achy, tight, fatigued, agitated, anxious,
sweaty, numb (arms, legs, fingers), goose bumps, pains in chest, dizzy, disoriented
Head – open, light, spacious, tight, constricted, headachy
Throat – constricted, dry, lump in throat; open, relaxed
Legs –strong, firm, grounded, wobbly, weak in the knees
Stomach sensations – peaceful, calm, nauseous, butterflies, knot in stomach
Face (jaws) – tight, tense, relaxed, soft, blushing
Shoulders/neck – tight, tense, stiff, painful, relaxed, soft, pliable
Back – tight, sore, painful, stiff; contracted, relaxed, pliable, flexible
Arms – relaxed, “rag-dollish,” loose, tense, braced, stiff
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©2017 True North Partnering Peter Vajda, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
[email protected] www.truenorthpartnering.com 770-804-9125
Mindfulness Practices

When you go outside, take a few deep breaths. What's the air like? Is it warm or cold? How does
the warmth or chill feel on your body? Try to accept that feeling and not resist it. Notice any plants,
their colors, and the contrast of those colors against the sky and clouds.

Eat a meal in silence. Don't do anything but focus on your food. Smell your food before eating it.
Notice what your food looks like. Eat slowly, and savor each bite. What flavors do you taste?

When you can, take some time at the beginning of your day to sit alone and think. Focus on your
breathing. Gaze out the window, and listen to the sounds outdoors. Or take a slow walk by
yourself. Count your steps while you breathe in and out.

If you can do this at work, try to stop for a few moments each hour. Note how your body feels. Let
yourself regroup and let your mind settle before you return to what you were doing.

If you struggle with anxiety or "worry thoughts," imagine your mind as a blue sky and your worry
thoughts as clouds. Now imagine those worry thoughts floating across your mind's sky, almost the
same as you would watch clouds float across the sky. Do not judge or resist your thoughts. Just let
them pass by as you watch.

One Minute Breathing
This exercise can be done anywhere at any time, standing up or sitting down. All you have to do is
focus on your breath for just one minute (or 10 seconds, or 30 seconds…start slowly…). Start by
breathing in and out slowly, holding your breath for a count of six once you’ve inhaled. Then breathe
out slowly, letting the breath flow effortlessly out back into the atmosphere.
Naturally your mind will try and wander amidst the valleys of its thoughts, but simply notice these
thoughts, let them be for what they are and return to watching your breath.
Literally watch your breath with your senses as it enters your body and fills you with life, and then
watch it work its way up and out of your body as the energy dissipates into the universe.
If you’re someone who thought they’d never be able to meditate, guess what? You’re half way there
already! If you enjoyed one minute of this mind-calming exercise, why not try two?

Mindful Observation
This exercise is simple but incredibly powerful. It is designed to connect us with the beauty of the
natural environment, which is easily missed when we’re rushing around…
Pick a natural organism within your immediate environment and focus on watching it for a minute or
two (or 10 seconds, or 30 seconds…). This could be a flower or an insect, the clouds or the moon.
Don’t do anything except notice the thing you are looking at. But really notice it. Look at it as if you
are seeing it for the first time.
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©2017 True North Partnering Peter Vajda, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
[email protected] www.truenorthpartnering.com 770-804-9125
Visually explore every aspect of this glorious organism of the natural world. Allow yourself to be
consumed by its presence and possibilities. Allow your spirit to connect with its role and purpose in the
world. Allow yourself just to notice and ‘be’.

Touch Points
This exercise is designed to make us appreciate our lives by slowing the pace down, coming into purer
awareness and resting in the moment for a while.
Think of something that happens every day more than once, something you take for granted, like
opening a door for example. At the very moment you touch the door knob to open the door, allow
yourself to be completely mindful of where you are, how you feel and what you are doing. Similarly,
the moment you open your computer to start work, take a moment to appreciate the hands that let
you do this, and the brain that will help you use the computer.
The cues don’t have to be physical ones. It could be that every time you think something negative you
take a mindful moment to release the negative thought, or it could be that every time you smell food
you take a mindful moment to rest in the appreciation of having food to eat.
Choose a touch point that resonates with you today. Instead of going through the motions on autopilot, stop and stay in the moment for a while and rest in the awareness of this blessed daily activity.
Mindful Hand Awareness Exercise
Grasp your hands really tight and hold for a 5 to 10 seconds, then release and pay attention to how your
hands feel. Keep your attention focused on the feeling for as long as you can.
Mental Focus Exercise
Stare at any object and try to remain focused on just that object for as long as possible. Keep a mental
watch on when your mind starts to wander, then just bring it back to the object. The longer you can
remain focused, the more your mindfulness will increase.
Tactile Exercise
Pinch your arm and pay close attention to how it feels and what your emotions begin doing. Pay attention
to the pain it causes, and how it radiates out from the site where you pinch. This exercise can really tune
you in to how your body deals with discomfort and what emotions rise. Do you get angry when you feel
pain?
Musical Stimuli Exercise
Listen to your favorite song and pay attention to how it makes you feel. What emotions stir? What
memories come up, and how do those memories make you feel? Engage the emotions and see where
they lead.
http://www.mindful.org/meditation/mindfulness-getting-started/
http://www.the-guided-meditation-site.com/mindfulness-exercises.html
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©2017 True North Partnering Peter Vajda, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
[email protected] www.truenorthpartnering.com 770-804-9125
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©2017 True North Partnering Peter Vajda, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
[email protected] www.truenorthpartnering.com 770-804-9125
Peter Vajda, Ph.D., C.P.C. is an astute observer of the human condition and is a passionate pioneer in the
field of mind-body-spirit integrative functioning and development. Dr. Vajda is dedicated to supporting
individuals and groups to enhance their understanding of how to live consciously in, and from, the state
of well-being that arises from the inside out which deeply supports an individual's ability to change,
grow and evolve.
Peter brings a diversified base of professional expertise - as an entrepreneur, an educator, a facilitator,
and a manager. He is sensitive to the diverse perspectives, demands and dynamics of relationships. Since
1981, he has facilitated individuals, couples, groups and organizations.
His life and the orientation he brings to coaching, consulting and facilitating are deeply influenced by his
understanding of, and his experience in personal growth and spiritual realization that integrate the
insights of contemporary psychology and psychodynamics.
For over twenty-five years, Peter's has been committed to his own personal and spiritual development.
His experience in working with the "whole body" is based on his studies of psychodynamics, ego
development, bioenergetics as well as energy healing. He has been a student and practitioner of
meditation, mindfulness and visualization for over twenty years and incorporates these practices in his
work with his clients.
Peter earned his Ph.D. in Education and Cognitive Psychology from Fordham University. His postgraduate work is in organizational behavior at NYU's Stern School of Business.
For the past 12 years he has written a weekly column – “Food-For-Thought” - focusing on moving
through the obstacles and barriers that stand in the way of meaningful change. He writes a weekly
column – Know Thyself - for the widely acclaimed international website – Management Issues.
His book– Becoming a Better You, Who You Are vs. Who You Think You Are – was published in October,
2013.
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©2017 True North Partnering Peter Vajda, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
[email protected] www.truenorthpartnering.com 770-804-9125