Ideas to help you
change your life
A self-help guide
D
O
O
M
W
O
L
DR
INKING T
OO MUCH
M O N E Y W O R R IE S
NO MOTIVATION
CAN'T SLEEP
STRESS
COMFORT
2
Y
R
R
O
W
EATING
This booklet may be for you.
What's in this booklet?
Read this booklet cover to cover or just read the sections that are important
to you. The ‘Dealing with Life’ section (page 4) will help you to understand
how the things we do, the way we feel and what we think all have an
effect on each other.
This booklet will give you practical and useful ideas to help you cope with
life by changing some of the things you do, improving how you feel and
changing how you think.
Things you can do to feel better
The Five Ways to Wellbeing............................................................................ 5
Manage your money...................................................................................... 10
Connect with people...................................................................................... 14
Work or volunteer.......................................................................................... 15
Say how you feel............................................................................................ 16
Eat well........................................................................................................... 18
Be active.......................................................................................................... 22
Be creative and keep learning....................................................................... 24
Ways to help you feel better
Sleep well........................................................................................................ 26
Find ways to relax.......................................................................................... 29
Be in the moment and take notice of your surroundings........................... 32
Help to control what you think
Challenge unhelpful thoughts...................................................................... 34
Sort out your worries and manage your problems...................................... 36
This booklet will also help you to
Make an action plan...................................................................................... 40
Cope with stress and anxiety......................................................................... 42
Overcome low-mood..................................................................................... 44
Feel good about yourself............................................................................... 46
Further support.............................................................................................. 51
3
Dealing with Life
How we feel and how we cope with life is sometimes called wellbeing.
Looking after your wellbeing helps you to:
• Cope and feel better when life is difficult.
• Enjoy life and get more out of it.
• Improve relationships with other people.
• Engage in the world around you.
• Accept yourself and not judge yourself too harshly.
We all have ups and downs in life, how we feel affects how we cope, how
we cope affects how we feel.
Wellbeing is feeling good and functioning well
Many things affect our wellbeing. The actions we take and the way we
think have the biggest impact. It can help to think about “being well” as
something you do, rather than something you are. The more you put in,
the more you are likely to get out.
There are five main steps we can all take to improve our wellbeing. If you
give them a try, you may feel happier, more positive and able to get the
most from your life.
4
The Five Ways to Wellbeing
Connect
Connect with the people around you.
People such as your family, friends,
colleagues and neighbours. Spend
time developing these relationships.
Keep learning
Learning new skills can give you a
sense of achievement and a new
confidence. So why not sign up for
that cooking course, start learning to
play a musical instrument, join the
library and read or figure out how to
fix your bike?
Take notice
Be active
You don't have to go to the
gym. Take a walk, dance, go
cycling or play a game of
football. Find the activity that
you enjoy, and make it a part of
your life.
Give to others
Even the smallest act can count.
Whether it's a smile, a thank
you or a kind word. Larger acts,
such as volunteering in your local
community, can improve your
mental wellbeing and help you
build new social networks.
Be more aware of the present moment,
including your feelings and thoughts, your
body and the world around you. Some people
call this awareness 'mindfulness', and it can
positively change the way you feel about life
and how you approach challenges.
Would you like to feel good and cope
with everyday life better?
If yes, along with the Five Ways to Wellbeing, this workbook will help you
to find practical ways to improve how you feel and cope with everyday life.
5
Does this sound familiar?
When things in life are going to plan, people generally ...
• feel happy and content with their life.
• look at life in a positive way.
• feel good about themselves.
• have energy and motivation.
When things in life aren’t going to plan, people generally …
• feel low or stressed.
• look at life in a negative way.
• don’t feel good about themselves.
• might feel tired or anxious.
This is normal but would it surprise you to know…you can turn it around?
What’s happening in our lives affects how we think and feel. What we
think and feel often affects what we do. In the same way, what we do can
change how we think and feel.
WHAT WE THINK
WHAT WE DO
6
WHAT WE FEEL
Imagine...
You get up in the morning
go start to go wrong.
This leaves you
feeling fine, but then things
feeling physically tired.
You should have been going to see a friend but
tired makes you
feeling think ‘I can’t be bothered.’
So you sit on the sofa and eat junk food for the rest of
the day.
do
What you
does nothing for your energy levels and
now you feel even worse.
think
‘I am useless’ and feel really upset for doing
You
nothing with your day.
So the negative cycle begins.
7
But what happens if we change one part of
this cycle?
THINK ‘I can’t be bothered’ you do go
Even though you
to see your friend.
do
something, go for a walk, play in
You both decide to
a five-a-side game or go to a dance class. You have a chat
and some fun.
When you get home you feel good and you’re in a great
mood.
Just one small change can make a huge difference. This booklet can help
you make positive changes to...
what you think
what you feel,
and what you do.
8
Things you can
do to feel better
Manage your money
Connect with people
Work or volunteer
Say how you feel
Be active
Be creative and keep learning
Eat well
9
Manage your money
Having money problems is a major source
of worry and stress.
Whether you find it difficult to make
your money last or if you are in debt,
taking steps to regain control will help.
The first step you can take is to start
keeping a record so you are clear on
what money is coming in, how fast it
goes out, and where it is going to.
Budgeting may take some time and effort, but it is worth doing.
• Be honest. Write down everything that you pay out, don’t ignore or
underestimate what you spend. If you do this you are basically fooling
yourself!
• If you can’t account for every penny the most important thing is that you
know, as best as possible, where you stand. Keeping a spending diary can
help.
• Don’t forget those extras like birthdays, presents or hair cuts.
• You will need to keep your budget up to date, bills go up and things may
change.
10
Do not ignore your problems – they can only get worse.
If you are in trouble with money – don’t panic but do
take action!
• There are no debt problems that can’t be solved.
No matter how bad it seems, it may not always be
easy or quick, but there is light at the end of the tunnel.
• See the Further Support Section on page 50 – 57.
Keeping a record helps you to:
Get rid of stress by planning and being in control.
Know how much money you have coming into your
household, when it comes in and how much you have
to spend.
Know where your money is going and cut back on
unnecessary spending.
11
Budget Planner
Income
Wage
Pension
Benefits
Board from a lodger
Child maintenance
Child benefit
Any other income
Total income
Outgoings
Rent/mortgage
Loans
Council Tax
Water bills
Ground rent
House insurance
Life insurances
Gas/electric
Telephone
Mobile phone
Broadband
TV packages
Car tax
Car insurance
Car finance
Other types of finance
School Meals
Pets/pet insurance
Petrol/travelling costs
Food/ cleaning Products
Clothing/shoes/hair cuts
Birthdays/celebrations
Other outgoings
Total outgoings
If you have more going out than
coming in, is there anything you
could cut back on?
Are you paying too much for your
gas and electric? You can save
money by making sure you are on
the best possible tariff with your
provider or by shopping about for a
cheaper supplier. Do the same with
your mobile provider too!
www.uswitch.com/gas-electricity/
www.uswitch.com/mobiles/compare/
contract_phones/
Make sure all the figures are for the same period of time,
for example ‘monthly’.
12
If you are in debt
Take action!
Gain control! Feel better!
• Open all letters about your debts. This will give you a clear picture of
how much you owe and help you prioritise your debts.
• Decide whether you need a debt adviser if you
can’t deal with your debts yourself.
• Write a letter to all those you owe money to,
asking them to stop any repayments and interest
while you take advice. Most will be reasonable
if you explain the situation and show that you’re
taking positive steps. You can get help with this.
• If you can – complete a list of incomings and
outgoings that will help the debt advisor get
complete picture.
a
• Make sure you are claiming all the benefits you’re entitled to.
Mental Health & Debt 2015 is a great booklet and includes
advice on how to get debt written off. It is available online at:
http://images.moneysavingexpert.com/images/documents
mentalhealth2015v3.pdf.
The Citizens Advice can help with a range of problems
and can be the best place to start.
Tameside Citizens Advice
Tel: 0161 330 2156
Web: www.adviceguide.org.uk
If all this seems too much, get help!
See the Further Support Section on page 51 – 57.
13
Connect with people
Good relationships, when we feel close to and valued by
other people, can be good for all aspects of your life.
We all need to connect with other people and research
shows the more contact we have with other people the
happier we tend to be.
Ways to increase your contact with other people:
• Make time to see family or friends, even if you’re busy
or don’t feel like it.
• Say yes when you are invited out.
• If you’re home alone all day, plan to go out somewhere, even to the local
shop and make sure you say hello to people. You’ll feel better for seeing
other people.
• Join a local club, class or exercise group.
• Think about volunteering somewhere.
• Invite people to do things with you, like take a walk or meet for a coffee.
Caring for someone?
If you care for someone else, don’t forget to look after yourself too. Take
some time for yourself. Do you know what support is available? Tameside
has a dedicated Carers Support Service, see the further support section for
contact details, page 55.
Is a relationship having a negative effect on your wellbeing?
Sadly it’s not uncommon for some people to suffer physical or emotional
abuse in relationships. Abuse can happen to anyone. No one should have to
live in fear of the person they love; reach out, there is help available. If this
is affecting you, see the further support section on pages 51 – 57.
14
Work or volunteer
Working improves your health! Whether you are
paid or not!
It really does have its benefits. It can give us …
• New opportunities.
• A chance to meet new people.
• New friends.
• New skills or a chance to build on skills we
already have.
• Work experience – great for your CV if you are looking for work or a
job change.
It can also help us feel ...
• Confident.
• Happier. It’s true, helping others makes you happier.
Volunteering is great for your community and you can really make
a difference.
Time Banking (community skill swap)
This is a way to volunteer without a big commitment.
For every hour of your time that you give, you are able
to ask for an hour back – for anything that you need
doing.
You decide what you can offer, anything from pulling
some weeds, cooking a meal, to fixing a car.
Everyone’s time is equal, so one hour of your time is equal to one hour
of another’s time, it really doesn’t matter what skills you have to give or
what you need. For more information see page 55.
Other kinds of work are important too, so don’t discount them.
You might be bringing up children, caring for relatives,
maintaining the home and garden.
15
Say how you feel
We are not talking about being aggressive or always having to get your
own way.
Sometimes when we are not able to speak our mind, we can feel put upon
or walked over. Sometimes this can even lead to us getting angry.
You should respect yourself and your needs. You should be able to put your
point of view across.
Can you think of any situations where it would have been better for you
to speak up? For example:
“I was late because I didn’t say I needed to go.“
“I bottled things up until I got angry then ended up having a row.”
When speaking up, remember:
• Rehearse what you want to say. It may help to
write it out first, too, so you can practise from a
script.
• Communication isn’t just verbal. Act confident
even if you aren’t feeling it. Sit or stand up
tall and make regular eye contact. Avoid any
nervous habits. Practise looking confident in a
mirror. Remember to breathe!
• Stay calm, breathe slowly, keep your voice even
and firm. If you feel too emotional going into a situation, try to wait
until it’s a good time for you.
• Start small. At first, practise with smaller issues before raising something
more difficult. Ask yourself how did it go? What could I change
next time?
16
Give it a go
What’s the problem?
What do I want to say?
(what words you will
use)
When is the best time
to say it?
I keep getting out of
work late and missing
my bus.
“I need to leave by
5pm to catch my bus.”
When I get into work
in the morning.
17
Eat well
It’s a two way thing, the food we eat affects our mood and our mood often
affects the food we choose.
If you have ever polished off a cream cake to cope with a bad day, you
will know that stress, sadness and even flagging energy levels can have us
rushing for the comfort food, but it can sometimes make you feel worse.
Food
your
mood
Take a simple cup of coffee!
When we are feeling tired and irritable, a strong cup of coffee
wakes us up, keeps us alert and helps us to concentrate.
But did you know too much caffeine can also make you feel
anxious, nervous and depressed.
It's really important
• To eat a healthy and balanced diet.
• To eat regular meals. At least three, evenly spaced meals throughout the
day will keep your energy levels even.
• Don’t skip breakfast; low blood sugar caused by missing meals can
seriously affect your mood, motivation and energy levels.
• Plan healthy snacks, like fruit or nuts, so if you do get hungry you won’t
be tempted by the biscuit tin.
18
Write down any foods or drink have and say how they affect your mood
good or bad?
Some foods and drinks can have a lasting influence on mood
due to the effect they have on the structure and function of
the brain.
19
Eating to improve your mood
Avoid sugary foods
• They cause sugar highs followed by slumps in energy.
Avoid too much alcohol
• It changes the brain chemicals and can make you feel depressed.
• It also disturbs your sleep making you feel tired.
Drink
• Dehydration makes you feel tired and unable to
concentrate. Aim for eight glasses of water per day.
• Water is best but other drinks do count, flavoured
water and herbal teas are good choices.
Eat fruit and vegetables
• Try to eat at least five portions per day to help
ensure you get all the vitamins your body and
mind need to function correctly.
• They have also been shown to increase happy
hormones in the brain. So ‘Five a day’ really can
help keep the blues away.
Eat carbohydrates
• Eat oats, wholegrain bread, rice, potatoes and pasta.
• They release energy slowly.
• They help to maintain your energy levels and
even out your mood during the day.
• They also help release those ‘happy’ hormones.
20
Eat protein
• Protein helps build brain chemicals which
will affect how you think and feel.
• Protein foods help to control fluctuating
blood sugar levels.
• Eat some protein with each meal. Good
options are lean beef, chicken, turkey, fish, beans, eggs,
lentils, nuts or seeds.
Could I make any changes to what I eat and drink?
“I could drink more water”
Could you make a plan? (Page 40).
21
Be Active!
We all know that physical activity is good for you and
if you can be active on a regular basis you will feel a
lot fitter and happier too.
Regular physical activity helps you to:
• Improve your mood by reducing stress.
• Boost your confidence.
• Improve your sleep.
• Forget your worries and clear your mind, allowing
solutions to present themselves.
• Release endorphins, which make you feel good.
Are you doing enough?
To stay healthy or to improve health, adults need to
do two types of physical activity each week: aerobic
and strength exercises. Adults should try to be active
daily and should do:
• At least 150 minutes of moderate aerobic activity
such as cycling or fast walking every week, and
• Strength exercises on two or more days a week
that work all the major muscles (legs, hips, back,
abdomen, chest, shoulders and arms).
But if you aren’t doing very much now, you can start
small with a few minutes and build up.
Even small things like getting off the bus two stops early or taking the
stairs will all help.
Just cutting down the amount of time you spend sitting
down can have big benefits for your health.
Moderate aerobic activity is any activity which makes you
warm and breathe deeper.
22
How can I start to be active?
List any activities you might like to try and give them a go. Have you
thought of walking, exercising with a video, dancing, cycling, swimming,
walking football, or taking a fitness class? Pick an activity you will enjoy.
If you try it and you don’t like it… try something else!
There are always going to be things in our lives that we
use as reasons not to be more active – but we can come
up with ways to get over these barriers.
Is there anything stopping you
from getting more active?
How can you get around it?
Don’t want to do it on my own.
Ask a friend to go with you…
Making an action plan will help you to get started. Go to action planning
on page 40.
23
Be Creative and Keep Learning
Doing something creative or learning a new skill can help you to feel calm,
increases your confidence, distracts you from your worries and can even
make you feel happy!
There are lots of ways to learn something new or get creative.
Have you thought of ….
• Reading a book.
• Learning to knit.
• Listening to music.
• Taking photographs.
• Learning to cook a special meal or dish.
• Growing things – try planting some vegetables or growing flowers.
• Signing up for a course in something that interests you.
• Rediscovering an old hobby that challenges you. Did you ever make
model airplanes, paint, write stories, or tap dance? Why not have
another go?
Make the project big or small, the choice is yours.
What could you try?
I have always wanted to learn Spanish, they do a course at the local college.
Look around your community, library, local college or
local paper to see what opportunities there are for getting
involved in something new.
24
Ways to help
you feel better
Sleep well
Find ways to relax
Be in the moment and take
notice of your surroundings
25
Sleep well
Sleep can really effect how we feel.
If you don’t sleep well, all of your
problems seem bigger; it’s difficult to
thinks straight and get things done.
Here are some ideas that can help:
Routine
• Sleep is about routine. Going to bed and getting up at the roughly the
same time every day will help programme your mind and body to sleep
better.
• Being active in the day will help with stress and make you physically tired.
Vigorous exercise too close to bedtime may keep you awake.
• Big meals, alcohol, caffeine (tea, coffee, cola and energy drinks) and
smoking before bedtime can ruin your sleep. Try to avoid within four
hours of going to bed.
Bedroom
• Your bedroom is important. It should be as
quiet and dark as possible and neither too
hot nor too cold.
• Make sure that your mattress is comfortable.
• If you’re often disturbed by noise try
earplugs.
• Maybe find a different place for your pet if it sleeps in your room and
disturbs your sleep.
• Ideally your bedroom should only be used for rest or sleep, not for
watching TV, eating or gaming. Switch off your mobile too.
26
Calm your body and mind
Write away your worries – If you lie in bed thinking about what you need
to do tomorrow, make sure you have a paper and pen handy. Make a ‘to
do’ list before bedtime so you’re not kept awake worrying that you will
forget things.
Before going to bed have a warm bath, listen to quiet music, do some
gentle yoga or relaxation techniques to relax the mind and body. See pages
29 – 31.
Don’t focus on not getting to sleep, distract yourself – fill your mind with
other things.
• Count backwards from 300.
• Recite a poem or song.
• Count in multiples of seven.
• Try the relaxation techniques see page 29.
If you can’t sleep and relaxation techniques aren’t working, don’t lie there
worrying about it. Try getting up and doing something you find relaxing
until you feel sleepy again, then go back to bed.
Lying in bed worrying about not sleeping or about being tired in
the morning causes us to be stressed. Feeling stressed will then
keep us awake. We need to find ways to relax our body and our
brains.
27
Things I could change to help me sleep better…
Try keeping a diary
A diary can help you to identify things that help you sleep better or keep
you awake.
Write down...
• What time you go to bed and get up.
• How many times you wake in the night.
• What you eat and drink before bedtime.
• How you feel (upset, worried or calm and relaxed).
• What activity do you do two hours before bedtime.
You might notice a pattern… then you can take action
Make an action plan see page 40.
28
Find ways to relax
If you are feeling stressed, can’t sleep or
even just need to spend a bit of time for
yourself, relaxation is for you.
Although the cause of your stress or
sleeplessness won’t disappear, you should
feel that you can cope better once you’ve
released all that tension in your body and
cleared your mind.
All relaxation techniques combine breathing
more deeply with relaxing the muscles.
Don’t worry if you find it difficult to relax at first.
It’s a skill that needs to be learned and it will come with practice.
Try playing some relaxing background music to help get into the
relaxation mode!
Easy relaxation techniques
You might want to do these once you are in bed, if you fall asleep
that’s okay.
But you can do them anytime and anywhere, so long as you can get comfy,
won’t be disturbed and have a few minutes to spare.
29
Controlled Breathing Exercise
You can do this at work, on the bus,
or when you are watching TV.
Place one hand on your upper chest
and one hand on stomach.
Breathe in slowly through your
nose – if you are breathing correctly
(most of us don’t most of the time)
you should feel your stomach gently
move outwards and your upper chest
should stay still (not up and down).
Breathe out slowly through your
mouth – you should feel your
stomach gently move backwards
slightly, while your chest stays still.
Breathe in – think “One.”
Breathe out – think “Relax.”
Breathe in – think “Two.”
Breathe out – think “Relax.”
Continue this pattern to 10 and then in reverse back down to one.
Try to clear your mind of everything except the breathing and the numbers.
If unwanted thoughts wander in, just gently push them away. If you lose
count you can start again.
30
Muscular Relaxation
This is a deeper level of relaxation.
• Find a comfy chair or lie down.
• Working through your body from your head to your toes, tense different
body parts for 10 seconds and then relax them.
For example:
Screw up the muscles in your face, hold for 10 seconds, then relax
Tense up your shoulders, hold for 10 seconds, then relax
Clench your fists and tense your arms, hold for 10 seconds, then relax
Tense your stomach, hold for 10 seconds, then relax. And so on…….
Try some visualisation
Imagine you are in the most relaxing place
you have ever been. A beautiful beach or a
clearing in the woods are places that people
often imagine. It’s best to use all of your
senses by asking yourself …
• what can you see?
• what can you hear?
• what can you feel?
• what can you smell?
• what can you taste?
Spend time there, enjoy it – you can be anywhere you want to be.
Try exercise such as yoga, pilates or tai chi.
31
Be in the moment and take
notice of your surroundings
Are you rushing through life so fast you never really
notice much?
It can be really easy to stop noticing the world around
you as we get caught up worrying about the past or
thinking about things we have to do.
Paying more attention to the present moment – to
your own thoughts and feelings, and to the world
around you can improve your wellbeing.
Some people call this ‘mindfulness’, and you can take
steps to develop it in your own life.
Becoming more aware of the present moment means:
• Noticing the sights, smells, sounds and tastes that you experience.
• Noticing the thoughts and feelings that occur from one moment to
the next.
‘Taking notice’ or ‘being mindful’ can improve your wellbeing by helping
you enjoy the world more and understand yourself better. It can also help
us notice signs of stress or anxiety earlier.
When could you try to be more mindful?
When washing the dishes, I will focus on how the water feels on my hands.
When I walk to the bus stop, I will take time to notice the trees.
Give it a go for a week to see if you notice any changes in how you feel.
32
Help to control
what you think
Challenge unhelpful thoughts
Sort out your worries and
manage your problems
33
Challenge unhelpful thoughts
Sometimes the way we think about things is not
helpful. It can lead to us feeling more stressed, it
can even make us feel bad about ourselves.
Often just the words we use when we think
about a situation can change the way we see
things.
Is your cup half empty or half full?
At times we all fall into the trap of unhelpful thinking patterns. Do you
recognise any of the unhelpful thinking patterns below?
Do you:
• Overgeneralise things? Example ‘this always happens’.
• Look at things in black and white? There is no in-between.
• Dwell on the negatives and ignore the positives?
• Jump to conclusions?
• Play mind reader by assuming that you know what someone else is
thinking (usually it’s negative)?
• Predict the future; usually thinking things will turn out badly?
• Blow things out of proportion?
• Put too much pressure on yourself by using words like “should”
and “must”?
• Label yourself or others, for example if you make a mistake you tell
yourself “I’m an idiot” or “I’m a loser”?
• Blame yourself when things go wrong, even if it wasn’t your fault?
34
A real quick easy thing to do, that works, is to practise changing your
thoughts into more positive ones. Have a look at the examples below,
see if you can add some more.
Thought
A more positive thought
I haven’t achieved half of what I set
out to do…
I have achieved some of what I set
out to do..
35
Sort out your worries and
manage your problems
Don’t worry – it’s normal to worry from time to time.
We worry about what might happen in the future – about the things that
we don’t want to happen. Sometimes the things we worry about never
happen anyway.
Worries tend to fall into one of two groups: worries you can do something
about and worries that you can’t do something about.
Yes
Can I do something about
this worry?
For example ‘I haven’t paid the
rent this month.’
no
This worry may start with ‘What if…
for example ‘what if the bus is late?’
Next Steps
Next Steps
Go to the Problem Solving and
Action planning on page 37 and 40.
Make a plan and do it!
Let the worry go as you have no
control over it.
Challenge your thoughts.
You may find it useful to distract
your mind by:
• Getting absorbed in a task.
• Getting creative.
• Practising mindfulness or
relaxation techniques.
• Following the five ways to
wellbeing.
36
Use the tool below to help sort your worries out – can you do something
about them? This will help you to decide.
What are you worrying If you can do
about?
something about this
worry, what are you
going to do?
If you can’t do
something about this
worry, what are you
going to do?
My mum’s health as she
is in hospital
Keep busy to distract
myself until visiting
time and practise
relaxation techniques
before bed so I sleep
better.
37
Problem solving
If your worry is one that could have a solution, then it’s a ‘problem’ and
‘problems’ can be solved.
Sometimes it feels much easier to avoid our problems in the hope that they
will go away. This hardly ever happens, in fact the longer we avoid our
problems then the worse they can become.
Step 1
What is the problem you have?
Break it down into smaller chunks and decide what you need to work on first.
Step 2 Write down as many ideas as you can think of that might help you solve the problem, no matter how silly they seem – don’t dismiss any possible solutions.
Step 3 Think about all the pros and cons of each possible solution, you could write them down.
Step 4 Choose one that looks likely to work.
Step 5 Use the Action Plan see page 40.
Step 6 Do it! Carry out your plan.
Step 7 Did it work?
Step 8 If it worked – consider tackling the next step of your
original problem.
If it didn’t can you make some changes to your chosen solution, or choose
another solution to try.
Try to
• Deal with problems as they arise, so that they don’t get worse.
• Decide what has to be dealt with now and what can wait.
• Make an action plan, page 40.
38
How to:
Make an action plan
Cope with stress or anxiety
Overcome low mood
Feel good about yourself
39
Make an Action Plan
Making a plan is really useful when
you want to make a change in your
life.
Breaking down your goal means
you will be more likely to achieve
it. You will know exactly what steps
you need to take in order to get
started.
It also gives you something to
check against so you know if you
are achieving your goals or if they
need altering or even changing
completely. It is no use having a
goal if we can’t achieve it.
Sometimes, you may have to break a
large goal down.
For example, you wouldn’t go straight
from couch potato to running a
marathon.
If you are trying to achieve something,
it helps to break down into smaller steps
that will help you achieve your goal.
40
My action plan
What is the change you want to make?
How important is this to me on a scale of 1 to 10?
Not important 1
2
3
4
5
6
7
Very Important
8
9
10
Where am I going to do this? (Home, work, gym, park)
What are the steps I need to take to make this happen?
Ask yourself
Is this realistic and achievable for me? Do I have the time, energy, money
and commitment to make this happen?
41
Cope with stress and anxiety
We all have stress in our lives at some time and the way you deal it can be
important to your health and wellbeing.
You feel stressed when there is too much to do, too much on your mind,
when other people make demands on you, or you are dealing with
situations that you have no control over.
Stress is not an illness, but it can lead to serious illness, if you don’t deal
with it effectively and it lasts long term.
Coping with stress
To cope with stress are you doing things that aren’t so healthy?
Are you…
Drinking too much
Overeating or not eating enough
Spending hours in front of the TV or computer
Withdrawing from friends, family, and activities
Using pills or drugs to relax
Sleeping too much
Thinking too much
Busy but not doing the things that count
Taking out your stress on others (lashing out, angry outbursts,
physical violence)
See ‘Things that mess you up section’ on page 48.
42
But there are more positive ways to deal with your stress.
Sort out your worries
Divide them into those that you can do something about (either now
or soon) and those that you can’t. No point in worrying if you can’t do
anything about it. But if you can do something – problem solving and
action planning will help you.
Take regular breaks
If you feel things are getting on top of you – get a hot drink
or a glass of water or take a short stroll. You will come back
ready to start again.
Be active
Getting up and getting moving, activity is a great way of
reducing stress, (page 22).
Phone a friend
We need to feel close to, and valued by, other people.
Having good relationships is fundamental to our wellbeing.
If you find it very difficult to cope, speak to your GP or refer yourself
to the Healthy Minds Service or Tameside Mind on page 51.
43
Overcome a low mood
At times, we can all feel low. If you feel low you might find that you:
Are unable to sleep,
usually waking up
early or waking up a
lot in the night
Feel worse at
particular times
of day, usually
mornings
Lose interest or
don’t enjoy the
things you should
Feel sad, guilty
and/or upset
Cry a lot or feel
unable to cry
Low mood
Eat more or less
Think that you
are worthless
Feel alone even
when you are with
people
Feel tired and
lack energy
Think that
everything is
hopeless and
gloomy
Can’t concentrate or
remember things
Sometimes when we feel low it can be hard to do the most simple things
just like it is when we are ill with a flu or cold. You may:
• Stop doing your normal activities.
• Become inactive.
• Cut yourself off from other people.
This is the worst thing you could do, you must keep going and taking part
in life.
The less you do, the less you will want to do. Even when you don’t
want to do things, do them anyway. To eventually feel better, you
must keep doing things and seeing people.
If your way of coping is making things worse then see
‘Unhelpful Ways of Coping’ on page 33.
44
Things you can do to lift your mood
1. Have a goal and an action plan (page 40)
2. Start by doing things you might have been avoiding.
• Empty the rubbish bin now, instead of later.
• Turn off the TV and take a short walk.
• Clean and arrange the contents of one of your drawers.
• Decide on a book to read and start reading.
3. Think positively and challenge negative thoughts (page 33)
4. Connect with others – the more contact we have with
other people the happier we tend to be. Find ways to
spend time with other people.
5. Be active – we know you probably won’t feel like it, but do
it anyway. Physical activity releases brain chemicals which
lift your mood.
6. Keep learning – learning new skills will improve your selfconfidence and lift your mood.
7. Try volunteering – if you suffer from low mood and are
stuck in the house a lot, it will get you out and meeting
people.
8. Take notice – living in the present and taking time to
appreciate things around you can give a real boost.
9. See the Five Ways to Wellbeing on page 5.
If your low your low mood is affecting your life, speak to
your GP or refer yourself to the Healthy Minds Service or
Tameside Mind, page 51.
45
Feel good about yourself
Do you ever:
• Lack confidence.
• Not feel so good about yourself.
• Let little bits of self-doubt creep in.
• Measure yourself against others and feel you come up a bit short.
Most people feel negative about themselves sometimes. But when this goes
on over time, it can really begin to affect you and how you live your life.
The great thing about confidence is that you can build it up!
You can build yourself up to protect yourself against the times
when life ‘knocks’ you down.
Some tips on how to give your confidence a boost...
Be kind to yourself
Accept yourself, no one is perfect and we all have
good qualities. Use the thoughts diary in the ‘challenge unhelpful
thought’ section to help gain a more balanced view of yourself.
Recognise what you are good at
We are all good at something, whether it’s cooking, singing, doing puzzles
or being a friend. Write down everything you are good at, don’t discount
the small things. Keep your list and add to it, reading it often will help
boost your mood and self esteem.
I’m good at... listening
46
Build good relationships
If you find certain people tend to bring you down, try to
spend less time with them, or tell them how you feel about
what they say or do. Be with people who are positive and
who appreciate you.
Learn to say how you feel
It’s important that we are able to respect other people’s
opinions and needs, but also respect ourselves enough to
speak out so others know how we feel. See page 16.
Challenge Yourself
It’s normal to feel nervous or afraid to do things at times,
but people with a healthy self-esteem don’t let these
feelings stop them from trying new things or taking on new
challenges.
Start small but set yourself a goal, anything you like but
watch how achieving it will boost your self-esteem.
Be Active
Activity improves how confident you feel both in body and
mind.
What things do you think will help you to improve your confidence?
47
Things that mess you up
Sometimes we over indulge to cope with life. We may drink, comfort eat,
spend too much money or self-harm.
Soon these ways of coping can start to sneak up on us and become a
problem, having a bad effect on our life.
Rate yourself, are you green, amber or red when it comes to the habits
below?
Problem
Concern
No problem
Habit
Alcohol
Rating Could lead to:
• Weight gain
• Cancers and liver damage
• Relationship problems
Comfort eating
• Dependency
• Dips in energy levels
• Weight gain
• Guilt
• Eating disorder
Spending too much
• Debt
• Stress
Drugs (including over
use of prescribed
medication)
• Dependency
Hiding Away
• Isolation
• Relationship problems
• Health problems
• Lack of support from friends and
family
Getting angry
• Damage to relationships
• Work problems
• Possible trouble with the law
Self-harm
• Secrecy
• Guilt/shame
48
If you are making your life worse and not better with the things you do,
there are things you can do to help.
• Don’t beat yourself up.
• Break your problem down and work on one small bit at a time. See
problem solving on page 36.
• Make an action plan see page 41.
• Get some help from the professionals. For additional support see pages
51 – 57.
Just take things step by step.
Think about drink.
One unit of alcohol is:
Half pint of
regular beer,
lager or cider
1 small glass
of wine
1 single
measure of
spirits
1 small glass
of sherry
1 single
measure of
aperitifs
49
Keep a record over the next week
Day
What I drank
Units
Total:
50
Key Support Services for Wellbeing
Healthy Minds
Provide a range of treatment and support options for people struggling
to cope with low mood, stress, anxiety, depression, or any of the common
mental health problems. There are a range of services on offer to help,
from online self-help courses, to 1-2-1 therapy sessions or group workshops,
such as mindfulness courses.
Your GP or health professional can refer you or you can refer yourself using
the online form.
Tel: 0161 716 4242
Web: www.penninecare.nhs.uk/healthyminds
Tameside Health Improvement Service
Do you want FREE help, advice and support to lead a healthier lifestyle but
don’t know where to start?
Your local Health Improvement Service can help you to: lose weight, get
healthy eating advice, quit smoking, become more physically active, cut
down on drinking or be more alcohol aware, improve your mental health
and wellbeing and improve your sleep pattern.
Tel: 0161 716 2000
Web: www.penninecare.nhs.uk/tamesidehealthimprovement
Mind
Tameside, Oldham and Glossop Mind is an innovative organisation that
provides services promoting the well-being and improvement of the mental
health of our clients. They offer:
• Information and guidance
• Talking therapies
• Community café and allotment
• Courses in anger management, confidence, assertion and self-esteem,
mindfulness and stress, anxiety and worry
Tel: 0161 330 9223
Web: www.togmind.org
The Sanctuary
24 hour Mental Health Crisis Support for those experiencing anxiety, panic
attacks, depression and suicidal thoughts, and who are in crisis.
Tel: 0161 637 0808
51
Self-Help Resources to Improve Mental Wellbeing
NHS self-help guides
Help with Anxiety / Depression and low mood / Sleeping Problems /
Depression / Panic / Stress / Controlling Anger / Shyness and Social Anxiety /
Obsessions and Compulsions / Bereavement.
Available to download in A4, A5, large print and easy read. You can also
listen to the guides, as well as download MP3 audio copies of the guides.
Web: www.ntw.nhs.uk/pic/selfhelp
Living Life to the Full
This online course is a life skills course based on Cognitive Behaviour
Therapy principles, the course covers: Understanding why we feel as we do/
Practical problem solving skills/Using Anxiety Control Training / Relaxation
/Overcoming reduced activity/Helpful and unhelpful behaviours / Using
medication effectively/Noticing unhelpful thoughts/ Changing unhelpful
thoughts/Healthy living – sleep, food, diet and exercise and staying well
Web: www.llttf.com
Moodjuice
The site is designed to offer information and advice to those experiencing
troublesome thoughts, feelings and actions. From the site you are able to
print off various self-help guides covering conditions such as depression,
anxiety, stress, panic and sleep problems.
Web: www.moodjuice.scot.nhs.uk
MoodGYM
A free, fun, interactive programme consisting of a number of different
modules. These are designed to be completed in order. The modules
explore issues such as:Why you feel the way you do/Changing the way you think/Changing
‘warped’/thoughts/Knowing what makes you upset/Assertiveness and
interpersonal skills training
Web: http://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome
Get self-help
Cognitive Behaviour Therapy Self Help Resources – Access to free
worksheets and handouts on various mental health problems, including
anxiety and depression. Also includes access to MP3 downloads such as
Guided Relaxation and Meditation
Web: www.getselfhelp.co.uk
52
The Mental Health Foundation
The Mental Health Foundation website – Information on a range of mental
health problems, how to spot common signs and symptoms and help
available. Plus access to free downloads and wellbeing podcasts such as
mindfulness exercises.
Web: www.mentalhealth.org.uk
Further support
Money
Welfare Rights Benefits
Free phone advice line
Tel: 08000 74 99 85, Monday, Tuesday and Thursday 9.30am – 12.30pm
The Money Advice service. Free and impartial money advice, set up by
the government.
Tel: 0300 500 5000
Web: www.moneyadviceservice.org.uk/en
MiNT Money management and debt advice
Web: www.mintameside.org.uk
New Charter Debt Advice Line. Free, independent, confidential and
impartial advice and support on dealing with debts.
Tel: 0161 331 2000 (available certain days and times)
Web: www.newcharterhomes.co.uk
Cash Box Credit Union
Tel: 0161 342 3266
Web: www.cashbox.org.uk
Tameside Citizens Advice Bureau. Information on a range of issues.
Tel: 0161 330 2156
Web: www.adviceguide.org.uk
Tameside Welfare Rights and Money Advice Service. Free telephone
welfare rights advice
Tel: 0800 074 9985
Web: www.tameside.gov.uk/benefits
53
National Debtline. Free telephone advice and online for fact sheets and
other information.
Tel: 0808 808 4000
Web: www.nationaldebtline.co.uk
Tax Aid. Help with a tax problem if you are on low income and HMRC can’t
sort it out.
Web: http://taxaid.org.uk/
Payplan Free debt advice.
Tel: 0800 917 7823
Web: www.payplan.com
Step Change Debt charity. Free debt advice.
Tel: 0800 138 1111
Web: www.stepchange.org
Shelter Housing advice helpline.
Tel: 0808 800 4444
Web: www.shelter.org.uk
Healthy Living
NHS choices – for information, advice and useful tools on healthy eating,
coping with stress, and getting more active.
Web: www.nhs.uk/Livewell/healthy-eating/Pages/Healthyeating.aspx
Tameside Health Improvement Service can support you to change
your lifestyle
Tel: 0161 716 2000
Getting Active
Tameside Health Improvement Service can support you to become
more active.
Tel: 0161 716 2000
Active Tameside – providers of facilities and activities in Tameside to help
you improve your health and fitness, develop your sporting goals or simply
enjoy your leisure time.
Web: www.activetameside.com
NHS Choices: lot’s of free tools, videos and ‘downloads’.
Web: www.nhs.uk/conditions/nhs-fitness-studio/pages/welcome-to-nhsfitness-studio.aspx
54
Mind: Allotment scheme, see page 50.
Walking groups in Tameside
Tel: George Cope on 07855 984 586
Web: www.walkingforhealth.org.uk/walkfinder/north-west/tamesidehealth-walks
Volunteering
Community and Voluntary Action Tameside (CVAT) promote volunteering
and support local voluntary and community organisations.
Tel: 0161 339 2345
Web: www.cvat.org.uk
Time Banking in Tameside
Tel: 0161 339 2345
Web: www.cvat.org.uk/time-banking
Tameside Citizen
Web: www.tameside.gov.uk/volunteering
Connecting with others/Loneliness
Silverline – 24 hour support line for anyone who is lonely.
Tel: 0800 4 60 70 80
Web: www.thesilverline.org.uk
Age UK
Tel: 0161 308 5000
Web: www.ageuk.org.uk/tameside/our-services/
Carers support
Tameside Carers Centre
Tel: 0161 342 3344
Domestic abuse
National 24 hour Free Phone Helpline
Tel: 0808 2000 247
Tameside Domestic Violence Support Service (Bridges) supports victims,
survivors and their children.
Tel: 0161 331 2552
Tameside Citizen for useful links and advice.
Web: www.tameside.gov.uk/domesticviolence
55
Women’s Aid National Domestic Violence Helpline
Tel: 0808 2000 247
Web: www.womensaid.org.uk
Men’s Aid National Domestic Violence Helpline
Tel: 0808 801 0327
Web: www.mensaid.co.uk
Broken Rainbow (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Victims)
Tel: 020 8539 9507
Web: www.brokenrainbow.org.uk
Learning
Tameside College, Beaufort Rd.
Whether you want to learn something for pleasure or to get a qualification
there are lots of courses to choose from. You can check them online or ring
for a prospectus.
Tel: 0161 908 6600
Web: www.tameside.ac.uk
Tameside Libaries
Tel: 0161 342 2029/2030
Tameside Citizen Useful online information for locations and opening times
for libraries in Tameside
Web: www.tameside.gov.uk/libraries/openingtimes
Low Mood
Healthy Minds Service, see page 50
Tameside and Oldham Mind, see page 50
The Samaritans
Tel: 08457 909090 – 24 hours each day, every day.
Anxiety UK
Tel: 08444 775 774
Depression Alliance
Tel: 0845 123 2320
Citizens Advice
Tel: 0161 330 2156 – Free advice for a variety of problems that people may
be facing.
56
Carers’ Centre
Tel: 0161 342 3344 – Information and help available for all carers.
Take Notice
Mindfulness
Web: www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/pages/mindfulness.
aspx
Web:www.getselfhelp.co.uk/mindfulness.htm
Sleep
NHS Choices: Information on sleeping better
Web: www.nhs.uk/LiveWell/sleep/Pages/sleep-home.aspx
Sleepio. Sleep assessment tool
Web: www.nhs.uk/Tools/Pages/Sleep-self-assessment.aspx
Relaxation
If you want to try some guided relaxation here are some free resources.
Don’t forget to check out your local library for cd’s to borrow.
Guided relaxations
The Mental Health Foundation Podcasts
Web: www.mentalhealth.org.uk/information/wellbeing-podcasts/
Meditation – 10 minute exercise.
Web: www.getsomeheadspace.com
Calm.com
Free mobile application to aid meditation, sleep and relaxation.
Web: www.calm.com
Alcohol/Smoking and Drugs
Tameside Drug and Alcohol Treatment and Recovery Service
Tel: 0161 672 9420
Drink Aware Website
Web: www.drinkaware.co.uk
NHS Choices
Web: www.nhs.uk/livewell/smoking/Pages/stopsmokingnewhome.aspx
57
Web: www.nhs.uk/Livewell/alcohol/Pages/Alcoholhome.aspx
Web: www.nhs.uk/livewell/drugs/Pages/Drugshome.aspx
Foodbanks
Tameside Foodbanks
Web: http://tamesidefoodbanks.madewithjam.org
Please note: Pennine Care NHS Foundation Trust is not responsible for the
content of external websites.
Patient Advice and Liaison Service
The Patient Advice and Liaison Service (PALS) acts on behalf of service users,
families and carers to negotiate prompt solutions and help bring about
changes in the way that services are developed. As well as providing a
confidential advice and support service, PALS will help guide you through
the different services available from the NHS.
Tel: 0161 716 3178
Comments and complaints
We want to learn from comments and complaints about our services. If you
have any, please speak with a member of staff. Every effort will be made to
resolve any concerns and complaining will not cause any difficulties in your
care with us.
You can also contact the Trust’s Complaints Department via post at Trust
Headquarters, 225 Old Street,
Ashton-under-Lyne, OL6 7SR.
Tel: 0161 716 3083
Email: [email protected]
Become a member of our Trust
You can be the voice of your community by electing or becoming a
governor, find out more about your local mental health and community
services, and receive updates, comment on our plans and get invitations to
health events.
Tel: 0161 716 3960
Email: [email protected]
Alternative formats
If you need help to understand this information, require it in another
format such as large print, spoken (on CD) or Braille, or require it in a
different language – speak to a member of staff.
58
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A special thanks to the Tameside residents who’s input and a support has been
invaluable – Rodney Cairns, Tracy Minshull, Paul Ward, Steven Arda, Simon Davidson,
Robert Hawley and Wayne Oldham.
59
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@HealthyTandG
HealthyTameside
Date of publication: August 2015 | Reference: 3385/Wellbeing Workbook | © Pennine Care NHS Foundation Trust
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