Sam McGee Franchise - Sam McGee knows Bitter Cold

Sam McGee Comedy Franchise
Original Sam:
Denis Braun of Zug Switzerland
A Swiss-Canadian businessman
living in Asia
Territory:
12 countries available including
USA, Canada, Scandinavia, CH,
Germany, Austria, France,
Russia, Chile, New Zealand,
China, Japan, and Korea.
Elements:
Costume: Fur coat, hat, & boots.
Theme: Bitter Cold + 200 jokes
Biography of Robert Service
Cultural and moral hook
Audience participation. Interact.
CD’s. Slide Show. Sound.
Banknotes from the Yukon 1907
Sam McGee Fashion fur / apparel.
Comedy Skit:
Theme: “Sam McGee knows Bitter Cold”
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Everyone who lives above 35 degrees latitude (North or
South) knows Bitter Cold.
The Sam McGee character personifies cold and the
Robert Service short story published in 1907 is the heart
of the skit. It is a vibrant, colorful, humorous, and
intimate expression of the sensation of “Bitter Cold”.
Sam McGee is a spirit from a virtual metropolis called
Purgatory (population 26 Billion). Core comedy material.
Each Sam will have a local address in their host country.
Eg. Purgatory Alberta Canada; Purgatory Colorado USA;
Purgatory Hokkaido Prefecture Japan etc.
Sam McGee Costume that we supply
Fur Coat
Seal boots
Fur Hat
Fur Mitts
Robert Service Biography
A
colourful biography of Robert Service.
Immigrated to Canada from Britain in his early
twenties. Manager at the Canadian Bank of
Commerce in both Dawson and Whitehorse
Yukon. 1898-1906. Sam McGee was a real client.
 8 years observing trappers, prospectors, and
gold miners during the Klondike era.
 Published Sam McGee in 1907. World fame.
 Died wealthy and happy 1959 in Monte Carlo !!
1
minute max
1907 Robert Service Poem.
“Sam McGee beats Bitter Cold” aka
“The Cremation of Sam McGee:
 See
YouTube.com Search: Sam McGee Bitter Cold
 Good diction and speed is paramount. If the
audience is English speaking then the pace
can be quick.
 Audiences where English is not the first
language needs a much slower pace.
 About
6 - 8 minutes to recite the short storey.
Moral Hook
 We ask the audience to spot the two
lines that highlight the moral compass
of most Canadians (or Americans, Russians,
Germans, Chinese, Koreans, Japanese ….etc. etc.)
 “A man’s last need is a thing to heed”
 “A promise made is a debt unpaid”
 Prize to winner: Swiss watch or pair of
Sam McGee Fashion Fur mitts.
Cultural Hook
 All
Canadians know bitter cold. (the same for
Americans, Russians, Germans, Northern Chinese, Koreans,
and Japanese ….etc. ) No matter what their race, culture,
diet, color, or ethnic group:
 China: No matter if they are Han, Mongol, Tibetan,
Manchu, foreigners, or new Immigrants.
 Russia: No matter if they are Cossack, Uke, Aboriginal, or
new Immigrants.
 Germany: No matter if they are East, West, Hamburger,
Frankfurter, or new Immigrants.
 USA: No matter if they are Union, Confederate, Native,
Indian, Ski Bum, or new Immigrant.
Yukon Historical Artifacts
*
Slide show background of arctic scenes.
 * Sound effects of howling winds, snow storms,
and barking dog sled teams.
 Reproductions of Canadian Bank of Commerce
bank notes that Sam McGee and Robert Service
would have handled everyday. They are
counterfeit reproductions.
*
If the venue has power, overhead
projectors and a speaker system.
Audience Interaction
 Sam
asks if anyone has a story about
bitter cold? Where are you from ?
 Just how cold does it get in ………………
A
Stock of 200 humorous replies. All clean.
 We sometimes plant 5-6 replies in the
audience before the performance to kickstart the skit humour.
 Max 30 minutes. Total skit: 45 minutes.
The Klondike Gold Rush 1890-1910
Direct Booking Rates
 Short
program: Intro, poem, biography.
About 10-12 minutes. $200-500 plus
expenses.
 Long program: Audience interaction and
banter on Bitter Cold. Target about 45-60
minutes. $600 - $1500 + expenses.
© This is a Confidential Draft for
evaluation and booking purposes only
 Please
keep this draft Power Point presentation
confidential until our Trade Mark application is
complete around February 20, 2010
 Thanks:
Sam McGee Zug Switzerland
 Contact:
www.SamMcGee2010.com
 Bookings:
[email protected]
 Phone
Skype: Megazebo.
 China: 135 2478-7658. Canada 1 403 247-1615
 On Skype:
Megazebo
Sam McGee Winter Fashion
 Our
Label:
Sam McGee
knows
Bitter Cold.
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I design and contract manufacture a limited line of Bitter
Cold layered clothing under the Sam McGee label for
recreation and commercial, police, utility, mining, delivery
and union clients.
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Full Silk body stockings
2 piece Long Underwear
Turtle neck Uppers
Down Jackets, shells, and rain covers.
Down sleeping bags.
Full Down Body Suits. Tested to -500C
Caps, toques, and Nightcaps. (Revived from the Charles Dickens era.)
Loop shirts and blouses. Casual and very functional. New product.
Core body warmers. New highly efficient heating products.
Traditional fur coats, hats, boots, and mitts.
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Brand Support
 All
Sam McGee (local franchisee comedians) will
support stores and buyer organizations in their
territory who purchase or endorse our apparel.
 This support activity will include store
appearances, skit performances, autograph
sessions, and TV & media promotions.
 Sam supports cold beer, ice vodka, peace
activists, the seal hunt in Canada and abroad;
and fur farming throughout the World.
Face to a Label
 We
put a face, a personality, art, history, and
culture to our Sam McGee Bitter Cold brand for
the benefit of our clients.
 Sam McGee persona franchisees in 12 countries
will all be men 45-60 years of age; tall, friendly,
an extroverted personality; articulate, bi-lingual,
good diction and voice, smart, non smokers and
non drug users, reliable, fit, and with grey hair.
Retired police officers, RCMP, or ex military are
good candidates.
Thanks for your support
See you this year at the Olympics
Colorado Ski resorts
Banff Ski resorts
Swiss resorts and Davos Summit
Harbin Ice Festival
Chan Bei San resorts
Sapporo Ice festival
Appendix: Sam’s Short Story.
Robert Service 1907
“Sam McGee knows Bitter Cold”
1. There are strange things done in the midnight sun
By the men who toil for gold;
The Arctic trails have their secret tales
That would make your blood run cold;
The Northern Lights have seen queer sights,
But the queerest they ever did see
Was that night on the marge of Lac Lebarge
I cremated Sam McGee.
2. Now, Sam McGee was from Tennessee
Where the cotton blooms and blows.
Why he left his home in the south to roam
'Round the pole, God only knows.
He was always cold, but the land of gold
Seemed to hold him like a spell,
Though he'd often say, in his homely way,
That he'd rather live in hell.
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3. On a Christmas day we were mushing our way
Over the Dawson Trail.
Talk of your cold--through the parka's fold
It stabbed like a driven nail.
If our eyes we'd close, then the lashes froze
'Till sometimes we couldn't see.
It wasn't much fun, but the only one
To whimper was Sam McGee.
4. And that very night as we lay packed tight
In our robes beneath the snow,
And the dogs were fed, and the stars o'erhead
Were dancing heel and toe,
Sam turned to me, and "Cap", says he,
"I'll cash in this trip, I guess,
And if I do, I'm asking that you
Won't refuse my last request."
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5. Well, he seemed so low that I couldn't say no,
And he says with a sort of moan,
"It's that cursed cold, and it's got right hold
'Till I'm chilled clean through to the bone.
Yet not being dead, it's my awful dread
Of the icy grave that pains,
So I want you to swear that, foul or fair,
You'll cremate my last remains."
6. Well a pal's last need is a thing to heed,
And I swore that I would not fail.
So we started on at the streak of dawn,
But, God, he looked ghastly pale.
He crouched on the sleigh, and he raved all day
Of his home in Tennessee,
And before nightfall, a corpse was all
That was remained of Sam McGee.
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7. There wasn't a breath in that land of death
As I hurried, horror driven,
With a corpse half hid that I couldn't get rid
Because of a promise given.
It was lashed to the sleigh, and it seemed to say,
"You may tax your braun and your brains,
But you promised true, and it's up to you
To cremate these last remains."
8. Now, a promise made is a debt unpaid,
And the trail has its own stern code.
In the days to come, 'though my lips were dumb,
In my heart, how I cursed that load.
In the long, long night by the lone firelight
While the huskies 'round in a ring
Howled out their woes to the homeless snows
Oh, God, how I loathed that thing.
9. And every day that quiet clay
Seemed to heavier and heavier grow.
And on I went, though the dogs were spent
And the grub was getting low.
The trail was bad, and I felt half mad,
But I swore I would not give in,
And often I'd sing to the hateful thing,
And it hearkened with a grin.
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10. 'Till I came to the marge of Lac LaBarge,
And a derelict there lay.
It was jammed in the ice, and I saw in a trice
It was called the "Alice May".
And I looked at it, and I thought a bit,
And I looked at my frozen chum,
Then, "Here", said I, with a sudden cry,
"Here Is my crem-a-tor-ium."
11. Some planks I tore from the cabin floor
And lit the boiler fire.
Some coal I found that was lying around
And heaped the fuel higher.
The flames just soared, and the furnace roared,
Such a blaze you seldom see.
Then I burrowed a hole in the glowing coal
And I stuffed in Sam McGee.
12. Then I made a hike, for I didn't like
To hear him sizzle so.
And the heavens scowled, and the huskies howled,
And the winds began to blow.
It was bitter cold, but the hot sweat rolled
Down my cheek, and I don't know why,
And Sam’s greasy smoke in an inky cloak
Went streaking down the sky.
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13. I do not know how long in the snow
I wrestled with gristly fear.
But the stars came out, and they danced about
'Till again I ventured near.
I was sick with dread, but I bravely said,
"I'll just take a peek inside.
I guess he's cooked, and it's time I looked",
And the door I opened wide.
14. And there sat Sam, looking cool and calm
In the heart of the furnace roar.
He wore a smile you could see a mile,
And he said, "Please close that door.
You see it's fine in here, but I greatly fear
You'll let in the cold and the storm.
Since I left Plumtree down in Tennessee
It's the first time I've been warm."
There are strange things done in the morning sun
By the men who Hunt for Seal;
The Labrador trails have their secret tales
That would make your gonads squeal;
The Northern Lights have seen queer sights,
But the queerest they ever did see
Was that night at the Spa in Snowbird Utah
I defoliated Pamela Lee
Edited Version © Denis Braun CH 2009