• Range = A-D
“AFMP” Microtheme Notes:
• Overall - effectively addressed the prompt - labeled and analyzed the TYPE of diction
(e.g. colloquial, subjective, caustic, etc. - YOU MUST LABEL/IDENTIFY DICTION!) and
persuasive appeals – logos, pathos, &/or ethos) in thesis AND state Royko’s purpose!
• What is wrong with this thesis?
Royko uses diction and the three appeals to convey his purpose. 
• What about these sample theses?
Royko employs intense diction along with pathos and logos to convey the
inefficiency of bureaucracy. Thanks, Tara
In “A Faceless Man’s Plea” author Mike Royko’s loaded diction and effective use of
persuasive appeals successfully expose the unethical practices of the Veteran’s
Administration. Thanks, Mariah M.!
In Mike Royko’s article “A Faceless Man’s Plea” his hostile diction in alliance with his
pathos-dominated appeals, unveils the VA’s failure to a veteran with the intention to
mend a broken system. Thanks, Nina!
• Remember, if it is in your thesis, you MUST discuss it! E.g. if you note the three
appeals in your thesis, and discuss pathos and logos only, you are not supporting your
claim/thesis. YOUR THESIS MUST BE SPECIFIC LIKE STUDENT SAMPLES!
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“Short works” – enclose in quotation marks (long works italicized).
Present tense in literary analysis! Remember this for next time!
Use power verbs! Avoid “shows” “uses” “states” – see list!
Proofread out loud for clarity/flow; read your paper to someone else.
Avoid summary – remember audience!
In “A Faceless Man’s Plea”, author Mike Royko’s loaded diction and effective use of persuasive appeals successfully expose the
unethical practices of the Veteran’s Administration. He conveys this message by telling the story of young Leroy Bailey, whose face was
severely mutilated during his tour in Vietnam, and his struggle with the VA to pay for procedures that might allow him to be able to once
again chew solid foods. Starting the article by describing Leroy’s accident uses pathos to exploit the readers’ emotions to lure them into the
rest of the article while simultaneously getting them to side with Leroy; the symbol of good. Ethos is seen when the officials that Royko met
with are all established by name and occupation (i.e. “Vern Rodgers, a bigger VA public relations man” and “Alton Pruitt, director of the West
Side VA Hospital”) so that Royko can then show how these high ranked officials balk under the pressure and aren’t able to come to direct
conclusions (Royko 2). The author applied logos to state that Leroy “could have received a 100-per cent disability rating” after his accident to
prove the hypocrisy of the VA since they only would pay for a “service-connected disability” (Royko 1). Royko’s sarcastic and angry diction
emphasizes the incongruities of the VA, as is the case in the quote “after one jolt of unfavorable publicity…within one-eight hour workday”
where he calls out the VA for only finally responding after nearly a year of waiting on Leroy’s part (Royko 2). From an emotional standpoint,
the diction fluctuates from angry and resentful to astonished and almost sympathetic, which affects how the readers perceive the VA and the
argument as a whole. Cases where the author expresses his disbelief, such as “I can’t even begin to comprehend” or “It is astonishing”, are
able to be easily reciprocated by the audience thus the message is transferred as well (Royko 1). However, the author might be conveying an
underlying message as he ropes the reader, himself and the VA in the “we” category in the quote “If we can afford…we can do…this man’s
face” (Royko 1). Now, the reader is a part of the problem and rather than offering up a solution, the ending, “there must be a lot more Leroy
Baileys out there”, leaves the reader with an empty and almost guilty feeling (Royko 3). The emotions that the author brings about in the
reader through his diction and other persuasive techniques are meant to provoke people to stand against the corrupt Veteran’s Administration
and help support the Leroy Baileys of the world who are still struggling.
Thanks, Mariah M.!
Royko employs intense diction along with pathos and logos to convey the inefficiency of bureaucracy. Throughout the
article the short and choppy syntax contributes to the mood of the author towards the subject. He begins the article with the
moment Bailey lost his face, thrusting the reader into Leroy’s life: “He was one of seven kids from a broken family in Maine.
[…] Then the rocket tore through the roof of his tent while he was sleeping and exploded in his face” (Royko 1). The violent
diction in the statement demonstrates this turning point in the soldier’s life. The account also includes a great amount of
pathos, not dissimilar to the rest of the article: “Because of his terrible wound, most of the goals and pleasures of men his age
will always be denied him” (Royko 1). By creating sympathy for Bailey Royko further strengthens his argument when he
later exposes the atrocities of the VA. Oftentimes the author employs anaphora “…he had teeth. Now he has none. He had
eyes. Now he has none. He had a nose. Now he has none (Royko 1), as well as governmental jargon to replicate Bailey’s
unfair experience for the reader: “for a condition other than that of your service-connected disability” (Royko 1). Finally, the
author sways even a neutral audience by utilizing strategically placed logos including, “He could have received a 100 per
cent disability rating for any of four separate reasons” (Royko 1) and “If we can afford $5 million to make the San Clemente
property prettier, we can do whatever is humanly possible for this man’s face” (Royko 1). Ultimately, by developing pathos
and logos through intense diction Royko achieves “an interesting study of a governmental bureaucracy in action” (Royko 2).
Thanks, Tara!
A’s & B+’s =
Tara, Brandon R., Nick, Ethan, Mariah M., Tien, Mariah W., Ann, Kendra B., Brandon C.,
Nina, Bradley, Amarom, Jon, & Kendra H.
See comments in paper (lots!), and compose a reflection. Note: my comments are in blue;
purple are other grammatical errors turnitin.com addresses (sometimes these are inaccurate –
ask for clarity).
I am concerned providing guidance for future writing (hence the amount of comments), so
please ask me if there is not a positive comment (what didn’t have a comment is positive). 
Also, come in to discuss/conference during Aca Prep or before or after school.
Receive a stamp when you have completed your reflection. Please see me for any clarification
of comments. 