Speaking Softly!
The Evolving Role
of Sikh Women in
Singapore
Harsimar Kaur
The roles of Sikh women in Singapore
have evolved substantially over time.
While there is significant room for
women to play a greater role within
the Sikh community and the wider
Singapore society, it is a useful
exercise of introspection to track the
areas in which Sikh women’s roles have
evolved. Taking the post-World War 2
arrivals who settled in Singapore as
the first generation, their progeny
now form the third generation that
has put down roots and formed ties
of community in Singapore.
social norms. These first generation
women were also not used to being in
positions of authority and desired to
maintain the status quo. The sociallyconstructed gender roles ensured that
the women remained the givers of
emotional care while their husbands
provided financial support. This has,
of course, now changed as Sikh
women of subsequent generations
in Singapore took on additional and,
in some cases, even leading, roles
of providing financially for their
families.
The first generation of Sikh women in
Singapore clung onto their previously
practiced lifestyle in India and tried to
establish familiar patterns in the face
of change. Maintaining traditional
gender roles for women was reinforced
by the need to maintain a distinct
ethnic identity. In adapting to the
Singapore society, the ‘transitional’
generation was torn between the
‘modernisation’
of
Singapore’s
society and the ‘traditional’, familiar
and expected behaviour.
In the area of marriage, the generational
differences are magnified. First
generation women had arranged
marriages, were accustomed to
extended family involvement in their
lives and remained attuned to these
groups for approval when their own
children were of marriageable age.
However, by the third generation,
women reclaimed the privilege of
choice in partner selection, paving the
way for what are commonly referred
to as “love marriages”, even crossing
regional and ethnic boundaries.
Compared to their mothers, second
generation women were exposed to
higher levels of education, increasing
affluence and a constantly changing
and increasingly diversified Singapore,
which broadened their horizons and
weakened the significance of regional
affiliations imported from India.
However, this generation of women
did not challenge the authority of
their parents and generally abided by
traditional customs such as having
arranged marriages and opting to
learn
household
responsibilities
before marriage instead of pursuing
and, sometimes, even giving up
career ambitions.
The third generation of Sikh women
places its Singaporean identity
at least on equal footing with its
Sikh one. These women participate
in religious and social activities
organised by gurdwaras and youth
wings but are also actively involved
in various other pursuits with friends
from different ethnic groups. These
youth are the recipients of more liberal
treatment from their parents who
were educated and had established
careers in Singapore. They feel at
home among the Singaporeans in the
public sphere but in the private sphere
also manifested a need to present
The immigrant Sikh community
exhibited several features directly
related to their cultural and emotional
links to India. They were marked
by a relatively closed social system
which was resistive of acculturative
pressures.
The
first
generation
women interacted mainly with other
women from the same gurdwaras
their families were associated with.
Having friends who underwent
the same struggles in adjusting to
a new environment provided the
reassurance and comfort of shared
experience, and a safety net that
would encourage cultural continuity,
including in attitudes to gender and
Khwaish 9
a particular, familiar and culturallycompliant side of themselves to their
grandparents and the wider Sikh
community. Living in these two Sikh
worlds is a form of adaptation by a
generation eager to define its live
using the vocabulary
and frameworks of
the
present
while
still seeing value in
retaining established
cultural nuances.
are outside of the Sikh community.
They do this for three main reasons.
Firstly, they are keen on maintaining
their ethnic image while coping with
conflicting demands. Secondly, they
make concessions their parents, not
The gurdwara played
a significant role in
bringing Sikh women
and
their
families
together in a collective
enterprise,
thus
strengthening the Sikh
community’s solidarity
a n d v i t a l i t y. T h e
gurdwara continues to
be a focal point that
h o l d s co n s i d e ra b l e
influence over the lives
of those who attend it,
not least because the
younger generation
quickly learns to
behave appropriately
in the presence of the
community.
Second
generation
women were gender
traditional, both at home and in
community interaction. This was
caused by the need for acceptance
within the Sikh community. In the
context of employment, family
ideology placed clear constraints.
These women were brought up to
adhere to their Sikh traditions and
maintain a distinct ethnic identity for
themselves. However, this generation
of women did not consider their
lifestyles as oppressive. Rather, they
deliberately chose to follow the
traditional norms in their own interest
and defined their roles according to
the cultural background of women in
their country of origin.
Third generation women behave
traditionally in their interactions with
their ethnic community but nontraditionally at home and when they
10 Khwaish
wanting to draw criticism for raising
their children to be ‘too westernised’.
Thirdly, there is also an element of
‘showing off’ and trying to outdo
each other to see who comes out 'on
top' and wins approval in the eyes of
the elders, ostensibly for fidelity to
the culture.
The differences in adapting between
the first and third generation women
may well be a product of the changing
socio-cultural scene in Singapore,
which is increasingly less restrictive
for women. The third generation
women are constantly re-evaluating
the traditional gender roles that
their mothers and grandmothers
followed while attempting to balance
them with taking advantage of the
increasing opportunities for women
today. They are trying to create their
own personal niche that incorporates
the values of their Sikh heritage and
mainstream Singapore.
Over time, important experiential
cleavages have been generated
among third generation
Sikh
women
in
Singapore. These, in
turn, have resulted in
ideological differences
and changes in the
women’s identity and
gender role attitudes.
While it is hasty to
proclaim that gender
egalitarianism prevails
in
interpersonal
relations among the
younger generation,
there is a significant
trend in that direction.
This ega litarianism
is indicated by the
emergence of a
more
egalitarian
household division
of labour and shared
decision-making.
With the diminution
of patriarchal gender
relations, women gain
power and autonomy
while men lose some
of
their
culturallyentrenched privileges.
Marriage and motherhood no longer
form the core of a Sikh woman’s
identity to the exclusion of all else.
Although this change may be viewed
regressively by many, it is nevertheless
an example of how the retention of
one’s ethnic heritage merges with
adapting to the changing social milieu
in a dynamic and complex multiethnic society. And as Singapore deals
with even more socio-economic and
demographic changes in the coming
years, expect the roles of Sikh women
here to evolve further.
The views presented in this article are those of
the author and do not necessarily represent those
of Young Sikh Association (Singapore). This is an
adaptation from the author’s Honours dissertation
which explores the subject in greater detail derived
from, among other primary research, in-depth
interviews with three generations of Sikh women in
Singapore.