Abdicake—to relinquish the last piece of cake to someone else (often to a forlorn-looking individual on
the outskirts of the circle of employees at an office party)
Burl—the curl and/or dimple on a freshly opened tub of butter
Carplunk—to keep pulling on the car door handle while someone is trying to unlock it
Chown—the broken, stranded, drowning chip in the dip that causes the dipper to awkwardly attempt to
rescue it by whatever means necessary (part of another chip, a fork, a straw, the three finger
claw)
Churko—a mysteriously hard unchewable piece of material found in a chicken nugget
Crastey—the crusty blob of harden toothpaste that forms on the opening of the toothpaste tube, which
sometimes collects hair, cotton ball fuzz, maybe the odd toenail—crastey usually causes a white
crusty shield to form at the end of the toothpaste tube where only a small blob of fresh
toothpaste can penetrate
Dating—a method used by women to subjugate men
Denavalate—to remove lint from one’s belly button
Emptilla—the excess tortilla left at the ends of a burrito
Facebook—a tool of procrastination and creeping
Fannards—the dust that accumulates on the edges of ceiling fan blades
Garloniocinnablech—the remnants of all of the bagel toppings that accumulate at the bottom of the
bagel transport box—the accompanying disappointment of biting into savory cinnamon bagel
only to unexpectedly find that it has been contaminated by garlic and onion shrapnel
Glaper—the piece of glued-down toilet paper that complicates the act of going to the bathroom
Grust—the gunk that accumulates at the bottom of a car cup holder
Gurble—the crumbs and popcorn remnants of old snacks found under sofa cushions when looking for
the remote
Hoodlgig—when the end of the plug becomes bent just enough that it no longer easily connects to the
outlet
Hydrundulate—the pages of dry wavy paper left after a liquid is spilled on a book
Micrustle—the crusty substance that flakes off the top of the milk jug
Namenesia—to remember everything about a person but their name
Pagage—the last pages of a novel that students can never seem to finish
Pantumph—to dance, wiggle, or adjust in order to squeeze into leggings or tight pants
Rejory—the moment you realize that as you are telling a story no one is listening, so you gradually just
fade out
Scripling—a writing utensil found on the floor at a fortuitous time (ex. a stubby, slightly-chewed pencil
right before a scantron test)
Slepf—the time between when you lay down in bed and actually fall asleep
Spinempre—the bad wheel on a shopping cart
Spozo—a sudden violent twitch that happens while sleeping during class
Starlazion—to be hungry but to be too lazy to procure food
Stice—the last, impossible to remove pieces of ice stuck to the driveway after shoveling the snow
Strash—the random stuff that accumulates at the bottom of a backpack (paperclips, the serrated edges
of spiral notebook paper, long lost note from friend, a couple coins)
Toop—the useless state of tape once it has folded upon itself
Trumble—to trip but to catch oneself before actually falling
Vexitate—to annoy by relentlessly sending unsolicited texts to someone—see also vexitation and
vexitator—see also related entries: Facebook Creeper, Call-And-Hang-Up-Guy, Awkward-GuyWho-Makes-Fun-Of-Himself-In-Front-Of-Cute-Girl-To-Win-Her-Over
Wogging—the semi-walk/semi-jog of old ladies in white tennis shoes
Yakyak—the stain and smell left on carpet from old cat barf (typically found in the musty basements of
elderly single ladies)
Zark—the mark left on one’s face from the fabric of one’s shirt after falling asleep in class