Susan Manitowabi
March 2010
Feedback, Crucial Conversations
and Conflict Resolution
“Peace comes not from the absence of conflict,
but from the ability to deal with it”.
A native American elder once described his inner
conflict in this manner: “Inside me there are two dogs.
One of the dogs is mean and evil. The other dog is good.
The mean dog fights the good dog all the time.”
When someone asked him which dog usually wins, he
reflected for a moment and replied, “the one I feed the
most”
(Author Unknown)
Feedback, Crucial
Conversations & Conflict Resolution"
 Goals:
• To gain knowledge of conversation types, interpersonal
relationships, perceptions and values.
• Assertiveness in communication - Understand the
connectivity between thoughts, words, actions and
behaviour
• The Seven Grandfather Teachings bond traditional and
contemporary lessons of life.
Feedback
 Transmitting information about the results of an
action to the individual who performed the action.
 This permits a more objective evaluation of the action’s
effectiveness
 It also permits modification in the ongoing action to
increase the likelihood of success
Seeking Feedback
 Checking whether information has been actively
understood
 Identify areas that are unclear, share thoughts, introduce a
new topic, express disagreement, asks for clarification
 Seeking feedback sends a message about a mutual and
reciprocal process
 what questions or comments do you have?
 What do you think about that?
 How does that sound to you?
 Providing an opportunity for clarification also creates an
opportunity to provide education and awareness.
Exercise
 Think about a situation that you have encountered
recently where it would have been good to get
feedback from an individual or agency or group.
 Describe that situation to your partner and then role
play it. Using your sample situation ask for feedback
from your partner and see how the response may have
been different. Alternately, you may just discuss
appropriate ways to elicit feedback.
Crucial Conversations
 Crucial – meaning necessary
 Standing up for your rights
 Advocacy
 Territorialism
 Ownership
 Opposing and incompatible positions on issues
Power of Communication: Difficult
Conversations
 "A difficult conversation is anything you find it hard to
talk about.“ (Dr. Cora Voyageur – University of Calgary)
Conflict
 Conflict – the striving by 2 or more parties
to achieve opposing or mutually exclusive
goals.
 Conflict is inevitable
 Positive functions:
 identifying important problems
 providing an impetus for change
Positive and Negative Outcomes
Constructive
Destructive









New ideas
Changed perspectives
Innovative practices
Clarification of positions
Identification of shared
interests
 Strengthened relationships
 Identification of obstacles
 Blending of different
opinions




Damaged relationships
Missed opportunities
Lost time and energy
Regression t o previous
patterns
Resentment and confusion
Choice of least preferred
option
Suppression of differences
Loss of trust
Where does conflict occur?
 Differences of opinion
 Home, work, school, community, relationships
Environments that support
constructive conflict?
 Support equality
 Value diversity
 Rules for expression
 Shared values
 Communication methods
 History of constructive conflict
 No fear or intimidation
Conflict Management
 the ongoing constructive process of dealing with
conflict between members of an organization
 It involves 4 basic steps:
1. recognizing the conflict or potential conflict
2. Assessing the conflict situation
3. Selecting appropriate strategies
4. intervening
Conflict resolution
 Process- eliminating or minimizing the problems that
result when different parties or groups compete with
one another for the same limited objectives.
 Processes:
 Facilitating compromises
 Achieving accommodation (or total surrender of one
group to another)
 Involves: clarification, education, mediation, proposal
of compromises or alternative solutions
Medicine Wheel Framework
North
Wisdom
Caring
Movement
Mental
West
Adult
Respect
Reason
Water
Spiritual
East
Physical
Birth
Food
Vision
Good feelings
South
Time
Relationships
Adolescents
Emotional
7 Grandfather Teachings
Nbwaakaawin - To cherish knowledge is to know WISDOM
Zaagidwin – To know LOVE is to know peace.
Mnaadendiwin – To honour all of the Creation is to have RESPECT.
Aakde’win – BRAVERY is to face the foe with integrity.
Gwekwaadziwin – HONESTY in facing a situation is to be brave.
Dbadendizwin – HUMILITY is to know yourself as a sacred part of the
Creation.
Debwewin – TRUTH is to know all of these things.
Final thoughts
 It is important to keep a calm, balance style when
working to resolve conflicts. The medicine wheel
framework and the seven grandfather teachings are
tools that have been used for generation to restore
balance and harmony and ensure people live lives in a
good way.
 There are many lessons to be learned from these
teachings, not only for people that follow traditional
ways but for all people to live in balance and harmony.
Miigwech
 References:
 Laurentian University, School of Native Human Services
(2009). Honours Bachelor of Social Work: Nishnaabe
Kinoomadwin Naadmaadwin, Field Education Manual,
Nesk 36095/NSWK 4605
 Northeast Mental Health centre, Mental Health
Development Initiative (1999), Conflict management,
Mediation & Problem Solving: A Training and
Reference Guide for Management