GENDER IDENTITY AND
We all have a gender identity, or an internal sense of being masculine, feminine, or other gendered,
which may or may not be visible to others, and a gender expression, or a way of representing and
expressing our gender identity to others. When an individual’s gender identity and expression conflicts
with societal expectations, they are often subject to harassment, abuse, and discrimination as they
challenge the idea of a strict gender binary.
An individual whose gender identity, expression or behavior is different from those typically associated
with their assigned sex at birth can identify as transgender, or “trans”, rather than being cisgender, or
someone whose gender identity, expression, or behavior matches those associated with their assigned
sex at birth. There are a range of other ways of identifying for non-cisgender individuals,
based on sex identity and sexual preference, too! (See the glossary on page 23.)
Over recent years, the transgender community has seen an increased spotlight through the visibility of
individuals like Laverne Cox and Janet Mock. However, the transgender community still faces challenges
and violations of their human rights, such as disproportionate homelessness, violence against
transgender women, and discrimination from public accommodations. With this in mind, it more important
than ever for allies of the LGBT community to have a basic understanding of what transgender and
gender nonconforming identities mean and how best to be an ally for the transgender community.
GENDER IS A SPECTRUM:
NOT A BINARY
Because gender is often presented as strictly
male or female, it’s easy to forget not all
people who identify as transgender identify
as “male-to-female” or “female-to-male”.
Other ways that people can identify include
genderqueer, agender, and bigender.
Additionally, many cultures have non-binary
gender identities, such as hijras in South Asia
or two-spirit for some Native Americans.
(Check out the Gender Unicorn on page 23.)
for a visual representation!
What Is A Pronoun?
Pronouns
Pronouns are parts of speech that replace other nouns. When we talk about gender pronouns, we’re talking
about personal pronouns, words that refer to a person. Pronouns include first person (I), second person (you),
or third person (he, she, they). Pronouns allow a person to accurately represent their identity in a way that is
safe and comfortable for them, and pronouns lets others know what pronouns to use when talking about or to
that person.
How to Use Pronouns:
Know Your Own Pronoun. How do you identify yourself? Introduce yourself with your own pronouns
“Hi, my name is Marie, I’m a human rights activist, and my pronouns are XX.” When introducing yourself, think
carefully about what you say. It is a privilege to not have to think about your own pronouns, or worry which
pronouns others will use based on your perceived gender.
Ask for Pronouns. When you meet someone new, don’t assume how they identify or what their pronouns
are. Try asking: “What are your pronouns?”, or “What pronouns do you like to hear?”
Respect Pronouns. Consistently use the pronouns someone has shared with you. Listen. Don’t assume
someone’s pronouns have changed based on their appearance or your perception of them. Respecting and
remembering pronouns is your responsibility.
If you forget someone’s pronoun. Respectfully ask for their pronouns, “Can you remind me what your
pronouns are?” Asking is always better than assuming or guessing and shows your respect for their gender
identity.
If you use the incorrect pronoun. When you use the incorrect pronoun for someone, they may feel
disrespected, invalidated, dismissed, or alienated. Apologize and correct yourself right away. “I’m sorry, I
should have said X.” Check in with the person in private later. “I believe I misused your pronoun earlier. Can
you remind me of your pronouns?”
ACTING AS AN ALLY
Intersectionality matters!
The transgender community is not a
monolithic entity: racial, economic, ability,
and other kinds of diversity exist, and each
individual transgender person’s experience
is colored by other aspects of their identity. It
is critical for allies to keep this in mind
when advocating for the community at large.
Listen to each transgender person with
whom you interact, respect their individual
experiences, and keep in mind how other
aspects of their identity affect their
experience.
• If you hear someone mis-gendering another person.
Gently correct the person who is using incorrect pronouns.
This can be as simple as saying “Oh, hey, Erin prefers the
pronoun xe.”
• If someone is consistently using the wrong pronouns
for someone. If possible, take this person aside for a quiet
conversation about respecting pronouns. “I’ve noticed
you’ve been using she for Lena, when Lena actually uses
the pronouns they. It’s important to be respectful towards a
person’s chosen gender pronouns. What can you do that
will help you remember to refer to Lena using her chosen
pronouns?”
• Making spaces inclusive of gender pronouns. Open
your activist spaces up to the conversation of pronouns.
Always introduce yourself using your pronouns, and be
respectfully vocal about using other’s pronouns. When in a
group, start by introducing yourself using the pronouns you
prefer, explain why we use pronouns, and then go through
group introductions.