T
he mobile trilled; it was Tuk asking where I was.
Stuck in b loody Bangkok I replied and in desperate
need of bad co mpany and a good wo man who can drink
whisky over ice. Sounds like you need some fresh air, a
change of scenery and attitude was her response. Get your
butt down here for a few days and the genie with the lamp
will sort your outrageous demands especially as Chang has
broken his foot and I need someone to drive the wagon.
Hence the call but Tuk and I go back years and what right did
I, a mere mo rtal man, have to refuse a beautiful lady especially after the many extraord inary episodes which somehow
always seem to occur if you leave the pair of us, unescorted,
in each others company! So the dye was cast.
The midd le of the follo wing afternoon after an arduous
bus trip with many changes, our 50 year old Mercedes
chugged, groaned and wheezed its way into the small town of
Ta Phraya the last strip of tarmac before the small village
where Tuk has her little business. Alighting, Tuk was wait ing
along with her crew of Nou and Luk and the two dogs Dam and
Bic. It was a boisterous reunion and after a quick couple of
rounds of Chang we all piled into the wagon and I fought the
rack and pinion fo r ten kilo met res until we reached our dusty
destination of Ban Khok Sung. The
village wh ich has about 100 families is hard against a disputed
and basically closed border area of Cambodia. The main occupation here is smuggling, mainly hard booze, prescription drugs,
girls, cigarettes and whatever else may turn a few dollars, but
failing that the village is also renowned for making Tan
(charcoal).
First stop Pan’s Tuk yells over the roar of our perforated
exhaust; I called ahead and she’s got food on the go especially
since we’ve got nothing at home apart fro m whisky. Th is announcement is greeted by whoops of approval by the boys
whose low-level alarms were obviously groaning. Pan’s can
hardly qualify as a restaurant but more a shack which purveys
grub; that apart it’s Thai food at its simp le finest as she is an
accomplished chef and always busy. Co mbine that with a large
military presence, her parents small basic guest house and a
select group of local female friends she has created a lucrative
business model!
As usual the food is superb and the table groans with Chang,
ice, whisky, water and soft drin ks. In short order our little group
expands to about a dozen and it’s obviously going to be a long
session. More food keeps appearing and in short time Capt. Sok
the local head cop joins us. Radio on table shift change is completed Mekong style and I am greeted warmly with a few sly digs
at Tuk causing much laughter and a vicious under the table high
heeled kick which, fortunately, for our official d ispenser of justice
was off target. Amidst the general frivolity he quietly advised me
that, even known as I was, to keep that pair of reprobates, nodding
in the d irection of Nou and Luk in close pro ximity. The border he
said was getting hot and a farang travelling alone might just be a
prime target. Enough said and I nodded my acquiescence. So the
rest of the afternoon turned into a boisterous and happy twilight
before satiated we all p iled onto the truck to negotiate the last few
hundred metres on the solo dipped working headlight with the
tribulations of Bangkok already another universe away. On the
way out I went to pay Pan who gave me only the food bill. Our
local policeman had picked up the tab for the drinks!
Life in Ban Klong Peng is raw and probably as close as you
will get to the realities of true Thailand. Th is hamlet is definitely
not for your average traveller but an eye opener of ep ic vistas of
the lives and struggles of others. Most of the villagers were illegals and paperless.
For any interested traveller my accommodation is an open
sided thatched hut with a mud floor but does have an electric
light kn icked fro m a neighbour’s line. My bed is the low
communal table with a lu mpy sleeping ro ll, sheet and a s mall
rock hard pillow. A mazingly I sleep like a log whilst my
minders and shadows Luk and Nou snore contentedly beside
me in hammocks. As for a toilet we have a shovel and there
is a stand pipe and bucket for those who feel the urge to
sluice down. However it’s accepted practice that the whole
village normally wash in one of the three reservoirs. Since
you shower at least twice a day ablutions sort of turn into a
community affair. Many a day Tuk and I ended up scrubbing
and shampooing the little ones generally because they didn’t
even possess such basic commod ities.
Long happy exhausting days of fun, whisky and companionship driving the recalcitrant wreck of a truck, logging and
making charcoal; fishing with throwing or sweep nets, frog
and water snake hunting at night by head worn lights, eeling
with traps and long lines, hand grubbing or free diving for clams,
mussels, snails and digging for land crabs. Add to that a bewieldering variety of fungai, plants, fruits, roots and nuts all gathered under very close supervision. All sounds rather picturesque
but the brutal reality for the average member o f this impoverished
community it is about survival because everything is eaten or
traded. Although their diet is all the above the staple is fish, rice
and fruit. Meat is generally not a priority though anything
caught (and I mean anything) will end up on the charcoals. The
four of us feed well for literally pennies a day most of which is
for wh isky which is consumed morning, noon and night. As for
cooking the normal kitchen is a charcoal fire pot, wok and
maybe a saucepan.
Their culinary tastes are certainly varied and wide. One day
in the forest I came across a hole in the ground about three
inches in diameter with its sides latticed in white web. Curious I
pointed it out to the boys who immediately started digging with
careful gusto. The results of their labours emerged about a foot
down in the form o f a very pissed off, very hairy tarantula about
the size of a small dinner plate which was cautiously captured in
a clear plastic bag. It was a slower drive home than normal that
afternoon as our new companion swung in its cage from a knob
on the dashboard with me eyeing it mo re than the track especially over the rough bits with the bag oscillating like a pendulu m brushing my left leg!
It was only later that
night idling by the fire I suggested they could probably
get good money for our
hairy giant fro m a pet shop
in Bangkok. They inspected
me as if I’d gro wn a second
head whilst exp lain ing some
basic Keynesian economics.
The spider had been traded
for the whisky we were
drinking and our neighbours
who were the other party to
this transaction had eaten it!
At least I slept content in
the knowledge that a marauding hairy beast would
not enter my nocturnal
dreams and awoke relaxed
the following morn ing. Grabbing a towel I stole out leaving Nou
and Lu k to their slu mbers heading for a refreshing morn ing dip.
My attention was immediately caught by a small crowd clustered around the corrals of the village herdsman. The point of
interest was one very large and enraged cow lassoed by the
horns intent of breaking free of the trio of men on the other end
of its halter. The more they pulled the more she backed and
bucked shaking her head and bello wing. It was definitely a
Mexican Standoff and the three guys decided safety first and put
the corral fence between them and ambit ion. Atop the bars a
small bespectacled man wearing a rubber apron was issuing
instructions waving in his right hand, like a conductor’s baton,
a very large syringe attached to an equally impressive needle. It
was only then the penny dropped. This was the local vet going
about his trade and displaying situational experience and orchestrated by his directions the irate and frightened beast is
roped by front left and rear right legs. With one man on each leg
rope and another on the horn rope, the poor cow is warped, like
a liner, slo wly to her p ier against the corral fence. The vet is
now standing firmly, legs apart, on the middle bar of the fence
with his torso across the top bar and the right arm extended
clutching the awesome hypodermic fisted downwards. His target is the small gap in the top vertebrae of the tail; not a simple
task and the crowd goes quiet in anticipation. Three events happen in the flash of an eye. The vet jabs and misses his target,
simu ltaneously the man holding the head halter lets go and the
cow with a bello w of pain thrusts her hugely powerful head upward with her horns locking under the central corral bar.
It is a vision forever ingrained in my mind of the vet sailing
through the air, still clutching his syringe, in a perfect backward
Swallo w Dive to land with an audible splat in the middle of the
newly vacated cattle pen. I’m no judge of such matters but such
gymnastic prowess would surely have been awarded an 8.5 or
even a 9 by any Oly mpian standards. The expectant onlookers are
convulsed at this display of Thai co medy at its finest. Fortuitously
our little vet is, aside fro m bruised dignity, unhurt though probably wishing he had put his apron on backwards that morn ing! The
rest of the incident is an anticlimax. Pro fessionalism triu mphs and
the cow, which is being attended for blood poisoning after a particularly difficult calv ing, is at the second attempt successfully
treated with the needle finding its mark. The impro mptu party
now over everyone disperses and I continue to my originally
planned destination to float serenely in the warm and relaxing lake
waters. I reflected, chuckling inward ly, on the events of a still
young morn ing though at
the same time thinking it
was a rare costly event for
these people to call out a
vet. The poor animal must
have been very, very ill.
I remember the rest of
that day being long, hot and
dusty and consuming vast
quantities of iced water as
Tuk and the boys toiled in
the forest while I battled
with the recalcitrant truck.
Spiderless we returned tired
and content and with some
four tons of good lumber
aboard my shoulder wrenching rack and pin ion had
been magically changed into
a form of power steering.
Back ho me having successfully negotiated a road block
(fortunately military who weren’t prepared to chance anything
with two quiet but teeth-bared large canines); Luck was surely on
our side in spite of the boys openly and very vocally drin king illicit hooch fro m a large Co la bottle. The first necessity was a
scrub-down in the lake and a checking and resetting of the night
lines. The boys score big with a fine catfish of about five kilos.
Cleansed and relaxed with the t raded fish providing all our necessities we drink wh isky with Coke and ice against a sinking orange/red sun. The antics of Nou and Luk with a catapult trying to
bring in a very streetwise young but unwanted cockerel provides a
side splitting cabaret for all of us especially our neighbours who
are also enjoying the liquid benefits of the day’s catch. We in turn
are invited to jo in them for dinner.
Eventually we adjourn, armed with yet more supplies of
whisky, Co ke and ice to the already crowded adjacent house. Kids
everywhere, an empty but still g lowing fire p it, the air redolent
with the wonderful aro mas of roasted meats, Lotus rice, spices
and the heady perfume of jas mine. A full moon provides a magic
amb ience comb ined with the laughter of the children, the music
and the spontaneous displays of Thai grace in classical song and
dance. Scenes of happiness and camaraderie which I have neither
the talent to capture in words or put on canvas.
Such are my indelible memo ries of the night we ate the stillborn calf.
Lee Charles 2013
A
fter finishing my article about local beers in
the June issue of Bayon I realized there was
lots more beer tasting to do since I hadn’t
touched on the dark beers and stouts. And
since I made such a point of the superior quality of bottles
over cans, I also thought I ought to see if I could taste the
difference.
One thing I realized in the process of writing the last
beer article was that downing a brew is different than
drinking for the purpose of critiquing it. While some beers
will impress you right off, whether positively or negatively, in most cases you don’t have clear thoughts about
what you’re drinking unless you’re concentrating on
thinking about describing it.
Further, I thought I should try to be a little more scientific about the tasting and rating by
setting up a blind taste experiment.
Three of us participated, two blind
tasting, the third did the pouring so
knew what he was drinking. The blind
tasting is important because we all
have prejudices which affect our
choices. That is similar to how people
in medical experiments who receive
placebos think they’re getting better.
The first experiment was with five
stouts; ABC, Black Panther, City
Black, Guinness and Angkor Extra
Stout. The last two were in bottles, the
rest in cans. Black Panther and City
are cheap beers in the $.50 retail category, the other three cost over twice
that amount. All are 8% beers except
for Guinness which is 6.5%. There are
actually quite a few varieties of Guinness circulating in both cans and bottles - awhile back I came across a can
that was only 4.5% alcohol which
seemed very strange to me. At any
rate, I only saw the 6.5% bottle when I
went out buying so that’s what we
tasted.
As it turns out, somewhat to my surprise, all three of us were in substantial agreement with only minor differences. We all placed ABC and City in
the top two spots with ABC rated
highest by two of us and City by the
third. I wrote ‘bright and bubbly’ for
ABC, my pick for first, ‘good but
lighter than (ABC) for City my second choice. The other blind taster
wrote ‘nutty, alcohol taste, full body,
hoppy, lingering after taste’ for ABC.
For City he wrote, ‘not impressed,
caramel notes, sour, sweetish; but in
the end after tasting all five he picked
City as his first choice. All three of us
placed Guinness at number 4, practically a shock considering its worldwide popularity. I wrote, ‘not great, a
little bitter’. The other blind taster
sniffed all five glasses before tasting
any and correctly picked out Guinness by its smell. He wrote, ‘nutty,
semi-heavy, fruity, not much aftertaste’. Myself and the pourer placed Angkor at number 3
and Black Panther at number 5. My fellow blind taster
placed them just opposite. For Angkor (which I imagined I
would choose as number 1 before the tasting began) I
wrote ‘thin but good taste’, the other blind taster put
‘soapy, light, bitter, not much after taste’. For BP I wrote
subtle, thin, not much to it. The other wrote ‘sour, light
body, (thin).
After touting City lager in the last beer article, it was quite
gratifying to see City Black rate so highly in the blind test.
I had my doubts, considering how cheap and obscure City
beer is and how quite a few people have trashed it, but at
least in this case my taste buds came through. They are
two different beers so one doesn’t necessarily carry over to
the other, but still…
As for non-stout dark beers there are only two that are produced regionally: Kingdom Dark and Lao Dark. Both are
lagers, Kingdom is 5%, Lao is 6.5%. The tasting came af-
ter drinking the five stouts, which meant I was already
climbing way up the tipsy scale. The pourer had shorted
himself on quantity – not sure why – so the remaining two
of us drank about two mugs worth of stout – equivalent in
alcohol content to three average beers – in a relatively short
time. That might have been a mistake. The drunker you get
the less discerning your palette – at a certain point you
wouldn’t be able to tell the difference between the worst
beer and the best.
First to come up was Kingdom, which I correctly identified, though of course I didn’t know that till later. It’s got
that expensive-ingredient craft-beer taste, which I like, besides I’m very familiar with it. I wrote ‘bright, light, sweet’.
My fellow blind taster wrote ‘sweet bubble gum, light
weight body, slight caramel, bright in mouth’. For Lao he
wrote, ‘first (choice) at first sip, light, heavier body than
(Kingdom)’, (after further tasting) he wrote ‘still number 1’.
I wrote ‘thicker’. The other two guys chose Lao over Kingdom, I preferred the later. In hindsight, just for comparison’s
sake, I should’ve picked
up a bottle of an expensive imported dark like
Leffe. I’ve drunk Leffe a
few times and it never
impressed me as worth
several times the cost of
a cheap beer, but, as remarked above, you don’t
really know a beer until
you drink it for the purpose of describing and
rating it.
My greatest disappointment regarding
beers in Cambo is the
dearth of dark beers and
the total absence of ales,
not to mention bitters,
porters and other oddball varieties. I’m not sure why it’s so
easy to produce stouts and seemingly insurmountable to
brew ales, but I can’t wait for the day that some brave local
brewmaster takes on that task.
The next day I set up an experiment involving three sets of
bottles/cans to see if we could discern the difference. That
involved Angkor, Heineken and Cambodia. First up was
Angkor, which I thought sure was Heineken. I also got the
bottle/can thing wrong. My fellow blind taster got the bottle/
can difference correctly and described Angkor bottle as ‘full
body, smooth, balanced, and the can as tinny, bright, sour.
As for Heineken, which I thought was Angkor, I couldn’t
even guess regarding the bottle/can difference. Once again
the other blind taster got it correctly. For the can he wrote,
‘tingly tongue, sweetish, heavy for a lager’. For the bottle he
wrote, ‘skunky, non-descript’. He was right on about the
skunky smell, though I doubt if I would’ve noticed without
him mentioning it. Still, anyone who’s ever been within a
mile of a skunk that’s let loose knows that smell intimately.
If you happen to be in close proximity when it does its
thing, you have to throw your clothes away because there’s
nothing you can do to get the stink out.
The third set was Cambodia, or was supposed to be.
Somehow between the time I dropped off the beers to be
sampled the day before at the friend’s place and tasting time
the next day the Cambo can had mysteriously disappeared.
Well not so mysteriously, it obviously had been mistakenly
imbibed. So what was the poor pourer to do after searching in
the fridge high and low? He decided on double blind testing us
by pouring a Ganzberg in place of the Cambo can. By then I’d
gotten everything wrong – though of course I didn’t know it
yet – and continued my losing streak by mistaking the Cambo
bottle for a can. The other taster got the bottle thing wrong, his
first mistake. Neither of us caught the Ganzberg substitution.
Most surprisingly, both the other guys chose Angkor first for
taste and Ganzberg second. I was totally flustered by then and
couldn’t even choose which beer I liked best.
Compared to the first day when everything, or almost everything, was consistent and clear and we were in substantial
agreement, the second tasting day was largely confused and out
of sorts, although I’m obviously saying that because I simply
was useless at telling the bottle/can difference. The other blind
taster got everything right except for the double blind substitution, which nobody could be expected to get. If there actually
had been a choice between Cambo bottle and can he might
have also gotten that right.
There’s a good reason
why good quality beers
are always put in bottles,
not cans, in spite of the
extra cost, but I sure
couldn’t tell by tasting.
Aluminum reacts with
food compared to glass
which doesn’t so there
must be a subtle difference. In fact I should buy
bottles instead of cans out
of principle because, regarding food, I never cook
out of aluminum pots and
am very reluctant to eat
cheap, down-home local
fare because the food sits
in aluminum pots all day. My aversion is helped by the knowledge that they use massive amounts of salt, sugar and MSG,
though, except for that, it usually doesn’t taste all that bad.
The blind tasting was edifying and fun and I’ll have to do it
again sometime, meanwhile a couple of comments on Kingdom, still my favorite local beer. Whatever financial problems
they might’ve been experiencing (if any) have been mitigated
somewhat by Brunty ciders leasing one of their bottling lines.
For at least a year they’ve got an extra income stream. If
Brunty’s is successful, they’ll set up their own plant. So far,
they say they’re doing well. I tried a strawberry; it was good
but had an unpleasant aftertaste.
One complaint/suggestion I have for Kingdom has to do with
the graphic arts on the bottle. The artwork, the animal drawings, are very nicely done but so indistinct I can’t tell what
animal it is without my glasses on, and then still not easily.
Considering most beers are consumed at night and many of
those in dimly lit venues, that’s surely a deficiency. Sharp and
clear is what is what all marketing and product design needs to
be. Ditto for the writing on the back. The font is so small I
can’t possibly read it without glasses even in bright light,
though I can read a newspaper under those conditions.
On another topic: Regarding my article in the July issue of
Bayon Pearnik, entitled ‘Race to the Bottom: Bangladesh Versus Cambodia’ I was negligent in not including the following
paragraph because it really brings home the large subsidies
afforded industry in poor countries.
In Cambodia, race to the bottom involves granting tax holidays of 5 or 7 years, depending on differing situations, to new
factories. Recently a minister mused that Cambodia should
end those generous tax benefits since the country really needs
to increase revenue. He went on to speculate that many businesses close up and move when the tax holiday ends, with
some merely changing their names and starting over with new
tax breaks. The news article then pointed out that all the
neighboring countries do the same, so it might be difficult to
implement such a change. Public subsidies for private businesses is just as evil in a developed country like the US as it is
in Cambodia, but at least workers in the US pay income taxes
to make up part of the shortfall in revenue. In Cambo workers are too poor to pay taxes so all the additional costs resulting from providing infrastructure to the new factories or education for worker’s children, etc., is born by the people as a
whole. Bangladesh also provides tax holidays of 5 years to
new businesses. Countries get jobs for their people, a good
thing for sure, but not the money to provide social services to
improve their lives.
Poor countries like Cambodia and Bangladesh are subsidizing rich corporations and providing cheap clothes for rich
people, surely a warped way to run a world.
Fast and Furious 6
A funny thing happened at the megaplexes last summer.
That was when Fast Five debuted, and unexpectedly crystallized the formula of what had to that point been a very
formulaic franchise. The restraints came off, any last remaining vestiges of logic were shed, and a ragtag group of
action heroes were assembled with Avengers-esque grandeur for one of the dopiest, most entertainingly absurd Bmovie spectacles ever filmed.
Believe it or not, Fast and Furious 6 manages to one-up the
previous installment; not by raising the stakes of the formula but by refining it. Fear not, die-hard fans: The mostly
vehicular mayhem and freewheeling hijinks are still there,
but the overall volume is no longer cranked to 11.
One reason why the series has managed to so much mileage is by re-inventing itself with nearly every installment,
from “Point Break with cars” cop drama to high school
melodrama to Ocean’s Eleven-style caper dramedy. This
time, it veers into Mission: Impossible secret agent territory, complete with megalomaniacal über-villain, exotic
locales, and a race to save the world.
This latest chapter in the ongoing saga of street racersturned criminals-turned Robin Hood heroes finds Dominic
Toretto (Vin Diesel), Brian O’Conner (Paul Walker), and
the all-star multi-national crew (Tyrese Gibson, Sung
Kang, Chris “Ludacris” Bridges, and Gal Gadot) mined
from previous installments living large on the proceeds
after stealing $100 million in cartel money in part five.
Agent Hobbs (Dwayne Johnson in number four of the five
movies he’s appearing in this year), who so relentlessly
pursued the team in Brazil, comes to them with an offer:
Help him take down mercenary Owen Shaw (Luke Evans),
who’s one component away from assembling a superweapon worth billions to the highest bidder, and he’ll get
them pardoned for their past crimes. He makes the offer
even more enticing for Dom by showing him evidence that
his late gear-head lover Letty (Michelle Rodriguez) is alive
and working for the opposition thanks to a bout of amnesia.
No, seriously.
Like the Magnificent Seven with hot rods instead of horses,
they ride into action to fight, shoot, race, do battle with a
tank on the Spanish highways, and take down a cargo
plane on what must be the world’s longest runway.
The action is cartoony (with at least a half-dozen deathdefying leaps to and from moving vehicles), and the dialogue is mostly one-liners and exposition. And, dammit, it
reminds us that over-the-top action movies can, and
should, be fun. The highlight: An epic throwdown between
Letty and Agent Riley (MMA fighter turned actress Gina
Carano, Haywire) that may just be the best girl-fight ever
filmed.
Justin Lin’s direction is more matured and confident now
than it has ever been, relying less on action beats and visual flourishes and taking some time with the characters and
story. Courtesy of returning screenwriter Chris Morgan,
there actually is an unexpected investment in characterization.
Granted it’s all melodrama, with Dom hellbent on redeeming Letty, and Brian is constantly looking over shoulder
out of fear that he won’t be able to protect his wife
(Jordana Brewster) and baby, but Lin and Morgan are
aware of the material’s limitations. More importantly, this
installment drops the self-serious tone that has dogged
pretty much the entire series, and the cast has more of an
ensemble feel. As large as it is, everyone has his or her
moment.
With its alchemical mix of stylized car chases, hand-tohand smackdowns, sense of honor, emphasis on its ad hoc
family unit, comic book-style continuity, and narrative
fearlessness, what by all rights should have been a throwaway series of half-assed action movies has instead generated a unique oddball mythology. It’s the Le Morte d’Arthur of cheap thrills cinema.
Lin is stepping away from the franchise after directing the
previous four, so who knows what to expect from the next
one (already in production), though a pre-credits teaser
provides a hint of when and where it will be set, as well as
a surprise cameo from the F&F team’s next nemesis. Even
a casual viewer may find him- or herself anticipating Fast
& Furious 7.
Its over
By the time you read this the
election results will probably
be out.
In a recent poll we asked five
long term bar owners what the
result would be and all said
about the same as last time.
Recently released data showed
nearly all of Phnom Penh’s
communes have voter registration rates in excess of 100 per
cent with one over 200 percent!
The same is true in some of the
provinces.
The highest rates of overregistration coincide with two
things: the provinces that are
worth the highest number of
seats at the election and the
provinces in wh ich the opposi-
tion are considered to have the
greatest chance of making inroads. In safe CPP rural provinces, the over-registration rate
is far lower.
Oh, what a surprise!
Sam Rainsy was pardoned and
was warmly greeted back with
nearly 100,000 people turning
out.
Funnily enough this was not
covered at all on TV or in the
mainstream Kh mer press.
Wonder why?
This large turnout may have
come as a bit of a surprise to
the CPP but their p robable
strategy will still continue.
By pardoning Rainsy the government looks good internationally. But the pardon came
too late for Rainsy to run as a
candidate. This leaves Kem
Sokha as the defacto leader of
the opposition in the National
Assembly.
History shows that Rainsy and
Sokha don’t get along and this
political un ion is a marriage of
convenience. So a power struggle will probably ensue during
the next six months leading to a
possible disintegration of their
A THAI LUNCH
So here I am once again in NongKhai after a trip to the Lao capital Vientiane to renew my Thai visa and although I’ve used four
different border renewal points I’ve always enjoyed this run most
simp ly because NK is a neat and friendly city and I have quite a
few friends who have made it their permanent home. Although
the Thai visa system has to qualify h igh in the ranks of bureaucratic lunacy for some, now long forgotten reason, they were at
that time free of charge. Such largesse is not a natural Thai trait;
so not one to look a gift horse in the face I had the cheek to apply
for a double entry and for some obscure reason it was granted.
Somet imes small miracles do occur! Once back across the Mekong it was decided that a good celebratory Thai lunch was the
order of the day so we adjourned to this little hole in the wall
restaurant down an obscure back street which grubwise it's a well
kept local secret and without doubt certainly not a Farang haunt.
Three hundred Bhat a head and you’re into banquet status!! (that
includes the booze). It d isplays no signage and only once you
have crossed the threshold would you recognise you are in a spacious and artfully bamboo decorated restaurant. There is no menu
the plates changing daily according to the whim of who is cooking. Without doubt it offers the best food in town. After half an
hour in a great mixed company the table is groaning under the
weight of local bottles of beer and wh isky and buckets of ice.
The starters of various very spicy salads and seafoods are starting
to appear and the restaurant team of mother father and daughter
are running and smiling....no wonder in one swoop they're going
to clear in one afternoon two or three days trading....It's one of
those lunches you know is going to be long with a lot of laughter
or so I guess everyone thought. I was particularly looking for-
party.
Playing right into the hands of
you know who.
Yes this is not a perfect election but slowly the election
process is moving in the right
direction.
The NEC needs reforming
with mo re balances and checks
but the CPP have probably
realized the opposition is gaining strength and will have to
compro mise more in the future
to stop the “I am voting for the
opposition, not because I fully
support them just because it’s
against you” syndrome.
On the other side Rainsy
should stop his racial incitement against the Vietnamese.
Imagine the National Front in
the UK being the darling of
the international press!
Strange world we live in.
Caffeine madness
Just when you thought it
couldn’t get any worse South
Ko rea-based co ffee ch ain
Caffé Bene plans to open in
BKK1.
In an area that already sports
three coffee shops on the corners of one crossroads and
tons mo re around the area it
really is looking like overkill.
Perhaps a niche market might
work?
Coffee enemas anyone!
Finally i t’s going to end!
A statement by the Trial Chamber of the Ext raordinary Chambers in the Courts of Cambodia
said closing statements in Case
002/01 will begin Oct. 9 and run
until Oct. 22.
Then of course there is always
the appeals process!
Will they remember?
After the elections how many
people will still be riding around
helmet less and going the wrong
way down streets.
In the last week of campaigning
Phnom Penh was like a free fo r
all (well Phno m Penh 15 years
ago just with more traffic).
Strange how an election can
make you hope for the return of
the obnoxious traffic cops.
Media overkill
Apparently a lady in the UK
gave birth to a boy named
George.
News channels in the UK and
int ernat ion ally th ought th is
trumped any other news for at
least two days.
ward to my mains having suffered the traumas of yet another
border crossing without sustenance my stomach was groaning.
Lao food does not hold any culinary attractions for my palate.
Oh the plans of mice and men....
Suddenly above the happy din emanating fro m our table a
strange roaring noise commences and second by second is obviously coming closer. Conversation starts to falter and is totally
muted by the appearance of what appears to be a spaceman in
the doorway pointing what I thought was a grenade launcher.
My brain is telling me to hit the deck when with a deafen ing
whoosh the thing discharges a pressurised spray of blue/white
fog into the roo m. After a five second burst the nozzle is retracted and our spaceman retreats fro m the doorway. Inside absolute chaos as everybody puts napkins, shirts or whatever over
mouth and noses. Eyes running we evacuate outside to fresh air
whilst the family crew frantically bring out fans to try and clear
the smog and we watch the local council pesticide crew move
further down the street to assault other premises. After a ten
minute delay some fo rm of normality has been restored and we
retrench to continue our lunch. A few minutes more with a co mplete change of food, glasses and cutlery the event is history and
steaming bowls are starting to appear magically fro m a regenerated kitchen fro m whence the swearing has stopped to be replaced with laughter.
I guess it never entered anyones’ thoughts as to how potent the
smoke pro jected pesticide could be. In a twinkling of a eye it
started to rain cockroaches fro m the ceiling, through the windows and walls. An impossible situation. We paid up and all
retired still hungry to Tesco where we d ined on KFC.
Lee Charles 2013
Amazingly, another slow month. Two in a ro w – now I may
have had a few all n ight benders on 51 st – I may even have gone
off to far away and foreign lands to experience further bacchanalian delights – but here in PP, it has been somewhat quiet.
Actually doing the rounds, most of the hostess bars I have been
to were fairly quiet, at least in terms of nu mbers of patrons.
Seems like a pretty quiet month. A lthough some of the dance
clubs are still insanely busy on weekends at least.
Despite the lack o f customers, I was very surprised at some of the
bars I strolled into, 136 st was the worst example – in three bars
that I walked into one night, I was either the only or one of the
only customers. Ho wever other than the lo w person on the totem
being forced to struggle over to get my drink, most of the staff
seemed content to watch tv or play on their phones. I am not
saying that I would have bought all or even any of them drinks
but it was surprising that none even tried.
I wandered around alone mostly this month so
the Publisher was not surprised when, unsupervised, I was late getting the Pub Page in
this month – oops…. I got the hint now can
you please make the Hunchback stop telling
everyone who sits next to me at Sorya to hit
me.
On the Larry watch – construction has started
– the new bar is expected to open in a couple
of months if I understood correctly. Looks
like the Japanese costume bar – Moepara has
kicked the bucket – miss the concept if only it
had been implemented a bit better (deep sigh)
(and no I am not sure why thinking of Larry
made me lin k to a Japanese costume bar).
Dropped by the Shanghai BBQ this month –
it was my first one without a western manager
there – sorry but the change is noticeable.
You still get value for your $10, but it really is
not at the same quality level as before. Maybe
previous management just set expectations too
high.
Anyway – on to the bars – I hit a few new ones, dropped by a
few o ldies and even went to a couple of live music venues – what
a month.
VVIP Bar is a relatively new bar on 136 st is across fro m Singer
where Moonlight used to be. I was told that the old owner sold
to a friend who made a few changes – the place has a bit of a 70’s
vibe in terms of décor but was pretty comfo rtable. There is a
pool table upstairs – music was at very pleasant levels on both
my visits and the staff was friendly and a lot of fun without being
annoying. Actually have been meaning to go back this week –
guess I know where I am going tonight.
An even newer bar is Loco on 130 st beside 136 Bar. Th is place
opened just in time to get written in the month, it took over a hair
salon if I understood correctly and opened only a week before it
has to stop selling booze for the election. Really liked the place.
Looks good with a decent sized wood bar – a bit bright in neon
red, but co mfortable. Music was good. Staff is pretty new but
making an effort. I suspect things will be running pretty
smoothly in a few weeks as more experienced staff is expected
(including a few more that speak English).
Dropped by the FCC (yes that PP land mark is still there at 178
st and Sisowath) a few times this month – don’t really get there
very often anymore unless there are people co ming into town.
Could not remember why until I paid 2.25 for my b lack coffee.
Still has some nice views and is a comfortable place to see the
world go by without having to go up too many stories to do it.
A draft beer is going to set you back $2-3 and a cocktail is going
to be $5-6 but there are two happy hours a day with house spirits
and mixers going for only $1.75 fro m 10-12 (yes cheaper than
my coffee) and cocktails, house spirits and draft beers 50% off
fro m 5-7. There are regular live music g igs that keep a chunk of
the neighbourhood up and there is usually some form of art exhibit going.
Also ended up at Kandal House on Sisowath near 144 st on a
few occasions this month – it has been an eclectic month of bar
hopping for me – while I usually go there for the food – there is a
lot to be said for the 75 cent happy hour beers watching while the
world walk by on the riverfront. There is free wi-fi – friendly
and helpful staff – great food and the best
show on earth – if only the motodops would
get out of the way.
Lastly on the odd place for me to drink in
this month is Blue Tongue on 174 st just off
of 51 st (beside the Walkabout) – oddly they
will never know they are being reviewed
since they don’t carry this magazine any
more. Ho wever I have been spending some
time in the hotel’s restaurant lately. Drinks
and food are reasonable priced. What impressed me was how n ice the p lace looked
compared to its black sheep sister bar –
come on have you been inside the Walkabout lately? It is a comfortable and very
quiet place to meet people, grab a few drinks
and some grub and have an actual conversation – no v iew and you almost feel secluded.
It may be noisier in busy season but right
now, I am enjoying the quiet.
Dropped by a few o ld haunts recently –
Candy B ar on 136 st really has a bi-polar
thing going on – there are some friendly and fun staff that work
there but there are times that I walk in and wish I had never heard
of the place – it is still one of the only all day hostess bars but
when the cleaning lady starts grabbing customers and asking for
a lady drin k, word of advice – you are open one hour to many.
Have not been to Smile Bar on 104 st in quite a while – it is a
loud in your face good time if that is what you are looking for. It
feels like a s mall bar but that could be the LOUD music blaring
distorting your sense of perception – there is a pool table on the
ground floor and a mez area for some p rivacy. The staff can be a
lot of fun and seem to have a lot of energy when the mood suits.
I have no idea why but after my experience watching my friend
drool over the fish tank at Cavalry, I actually noticed the really
tiny fish tank. Perhaps I was just staring at it to avoid the eyes of
the staff member who kept doing fake cheers with me fro m a few
seats over as some odd attempt to hypnotize me into buying her a
drink.
Last but not least for the month, Starlight on 110 st – still a
gloomy yet friendly place – I know odd combo – with staff that
really do seem to smile a lot. I am certain ly not a regular but I
can see why one would be. If you are bored, the staff will do
their best to force you to have some fun – they don’t want you
bringing the mood down.
The Real Purpose of the Drug War
A heart in love will decipher every squiggle in a letter as a kiss. In
the final days of the 2008 campaign and in the opening ones of his
administration, Obama and his top legal aides seemed to the eager
ears of marijuana legalizers on the West Coast to be opening the
door to a new, sensible era.
Here was the basic line as dispensed by Attorney General Eric
Holder on March 18, 2009:
“The policy is to go after those people who violate both federal
and state law. To the extent that people do that and try to use
med ical marijuana laws [such as Californ ia’s Prop 215] as a
shield for activ ity that is not designed to co mport with what the
intention was of the state law, those are the organizations, the
people, that we will target. And that is consistent with what the
president said during the campaign.”
The next day drug activists exulted in a b ig win. “Today’s comments clearly represent a change in policy out of Washington,”
Ethan Nadelmann of the Drug Policy A lliance told the LA Times.
Holder, Nadelmann added in the New York Times, had sent a
clear message to the DEA that the feds now recognize state medical marijuana laws as “kosher.”
Striking a d ifferent sort of exultant note, the US Attorney’s
spokesman in Los Angeles, Thom Mro zek, told the LA Times:
“In every single case we have prosecuted, the defendants violated
state as well as federal law.” On January 22 (two days after
Obama’s inauguration) DEA agents conducted a raid on a South
Lake Tahoe cannabis dispensary run by a wheelchair-bound entrepreneur named Ken Estes. They seized about five pounds of
herbal medicine and a few thousand dollars. No arrests were
made. “It was a typical rip-and-run,” Estes said. On February 3,
the DEA raided four cannabis dispensaries in the LA area. Eight
days later DEA agents busted the MendoHealing Co-operative
farm in Fort Bragg, California.
The love-flushed Obamians had forgotten how to read political
declarations with a close and realistic eye, and to bear in mind the
eternal power struggles between federal prosecutors and enforcers—e.g., the DEA and equivalent state bodies. The feds wanted
to make it co mpletely clear that, whatever Obama might h int at,
they weren’t going to be hog-tied by wussy state laws. Bust a guy
in a wheelchair, bust a dispensary, make your point: I’m the man.
Back in the early 1990s the price to g rower per pound was around
$5,000. A couple of years ago, the average had dropped to about
$2,000, more for really skilled gro wers, who “black bo x” their
greenhouses, darkening them earlier each day to trick the plants
into putting out an early crop. Right now, it’s down to maybe
$1,000 a pound in the fall, dropping to $600 in the Christmas
rush. Do these prices bear any relation to the prices in the fancy
dispensaries in southern Californ ia? Guess.
Bruce Anderson, editor of the Boonville-based Anderson Valley
Advertiser, describes the realit ies:
“Do a Google Earth on your Mendo neighborhood. Now knowing
what to expect, we d id one on Boonville. As the satellite camera
zeroes in, the grows look like lemon groves, neatly arrayed in the
backyards on both sides of Highway 128 fro m one end of Boonville to the other. In an imploding economy does anyone seriously
expect an enterprise that pays lots of off-the-books, tax-free cash
can be stopped short of full-on legalization? In just the last week,
raids were conducted on two homes, one in Eu reka, one in Redwood Valley, where better than $400,000 cash was confiscated by
the forces of law and order. Every time the cops make big cash
hauls more people are convinced that they, too, should get into
the pot business. A smaller number of people, of course, are convinced to try to find dope houses to rip off, hence X-number of
home invasions, most of them unreported. .
But legalizat ion is not a realistic prospect and so the status of the
herb will inevitably remain cloudy. For its part the DEA is announcing big impending raids in Mendocino county, some targeting the vast stretches of the (federally) controlled Mendocino
National Fo rest, and the growers drawing on the waters of the
middle Eel. There are serious environmental and criminal issues
here. Obama said at the start of his ad ministration, “I can’t ask
the Justice Department to ignore comp letely a federal law that’s
on the books. What I can say is, “Use your prosecutorial discretion and properly prio rit ize your resources to go after th ings that
are really doing fo lks damage.”
As Mark Scaramela, also of the AVA, ticks off the list, “there
are growers, many of them v iolent, using public lands. Who
wants to go hiking and run into a criminal operation? These
same growers are responsible for associated illegal water diversions and serious environmental degradation. In one recent raid
they took a mile of b lack plastic irrigation pipe out of the National Forest.”
Fine for the Feds to go into action here. What’s not fine is a farreaching national campaign against medical gro wers right across
the US. A ll the usual arsenal of harassments have been brought
into play by mu ltiple agencies, starting with the IRS, bankrupting dispensaries by simply denying elementary business expenses.
Has the drug war – as a war on the poor – slowed down? In 2010
some 850,000 A mericans were arrested for marijuana related
offenses of which the vast majority was for possession. That
means since Obama took office it is likely well over 2.5 million
Americans have been arrested for marijuana. This under the aegis of a President who cosily d iscloses his marijuana habit as a
young man. One bust, Mr Obama, and you’d be still on the
South Side. But then, your sense of self-righteousness is too
distended to be deflated by any sense of hypocrisy.
Take a look at New Yo rk City.
In the Bloo mberg years in New Yo rk City “stop and frisks” have
gone through the roof. In 2002, when Bloo mberg had only just
stepped into the Mayor’s office, 97,296 New Yorkers were
stopped by the police under Stop and Frisk. 80,176 were totally
innocent (82 percent).
By 2009, 581,168 New Yorkers were stopped by the police.
510,742 were totally innocent (88 percent).
310,611 were black
(55 percent).
180,055 were Latino (32 percent).
53,601 were
white (10 percent).
289,602 were aged 14-24 (50 percent). (For
reference, according to the Census Bureau, there were about
only 300,000 black men between the ages of 13 and 34 living in
the city that year.)
In 2011, 685,724 New Yorkers were stopped by the police.
605,328 were totally innocent (88 percent).
350,743 were black
(53 percent).
223,740 were Latino (34 percent).
61,805 were
white (9 percent).
341,581 were aged 14-24 (51 percent).
What happens after the initiation of Stop and Frisk when the
person “complies” with an NYPD officer’s directive to “empty
their pockets”? If up to 25 grams of marijuana stays out of view,
that constitutes only a violation. If the cop forces the weed into
public view we’re looking at a misdemeanor, with potentially
devastating career consequences for the target. Lo w level arrests
for possession of marijuana in New Yo rk have gone up fro m
about 2,000 in 1990 to 50,684 arrests in 2011 for possession of a
small amount of marijuana, mo re than for any other offense, according to an analysis of state data by Harry G. Levine, a sociologist at Queens College.
Fro m 2002 to 2011, New Yo rk City recorded 400,000 low-level
marijuana arrests, according to Levine’s analysis. That represented more arrests than under Bloo mberg’s three predecessors
put together — a period of 24 years. Most of those arrested have
been young black and Hispanic men, and most had no prio r
criminal convictions.
Don’t forget: Drug policy in the US is about social control.
That’s the name of the game.
Who’s Really ‘The Enemy’ In the Bradley
Manning Case?
We now have clarity fro m a full-b ird co lonel in judicial robes
that Bradley Manning is to be charged with “aid ing the enemy.”
OK, not much of a surprise here. Co lonel Den ise Lind’s ruling
seems pretty predictable.
Her ruling may make things simp le for all the right-lean ing podpeople who salute everything a field grade military officer says,
but for the rest of us, it raises a profound and rather perplexing
question: Exactly who is the “enemy” in this case?
The military and intelligence agency brass and their enablers will
tell you it’s some nefarious and nebulous network called al
Qaeda, wh ich we should all know by now is a substitute for our
old Co ld War enemies and fictional entit ies like Spectre in the
original Ian Fleming spy pulps. That is, al Qaeda has become The
Boogie Man.
American patriots on the right will get no argu ment fro m me that
there are, indeed, people and affiliat ions that mean real harm to
Americans (including me) and that we need to protect ourselves
fro m them. But that doesn’t address the question whether al
Qaeda and other “terrorist” groups are being exp loited as the
boogie man for the convenience of the Pentagon, the CIA, NSA
and demagogues like New York Congressman Peter King.
I fear a lot of “the hunt for al Qaeda” narrative is standard militarist fear-mongering employed to justify embarrassing and often
illegal secret behavior that would shrivel up if it were really exposed to the light of day. Boogie men like al Qaeda are also useful to advance the careers and interests of the usual gang of capitalists and oppressive wealthy dominators that made this nation
what it is today — the nation that Bill O’Reilly was wondering
the other night might be going down the tubes like Old Ro me.
To understand exactly who “the enemy” is in this case, it seems
logical to, first, ask who it was Bradley Manning intended to
benefit by leaking all that information to WikiLeaks. I’m not sure
whether Co lonel Lind asked young Manning this, but I doubt it.
Fro m his statements and from all that I can glean from follo wing
the case in the press — I and other journalists have not had the
opportunity to interview Manning — the key reason he leaked all
that information, including a damning video of US Apache helicopters gunning down a Reuters cameraman and another Reuters
emp loyee and embarrassing leaks of back-channel State Depart ment cables, was to share it with the A merican people.
If any credence is given to the accused man’s own admissions,
which seem absolutely plausible to me, it would seem logical
that, fro m the military’s point of v iew, the A merican people are
the enemy in this syllogis m.
I realize for anyone to conceive of this as a serious analysis as to
who the enemy is in this case, one has to be skeptical of our US
military and intelligence apparatus circa 2013. Those captivated
by the military and its mystique will obviously sputter and groan
and see such an analysis as the ravings of a lunatic left-wing
journalist. They will also imp ly, without, of course, openly saying it, that such an analysis is pointless because they — the military and intelligence complex — have young Manning by the
you-know-whats. If I’m allowed to put words in their mouth,
they might put it this way:
“Eat your hearts out, you left-wing, pin ko fags. We have him
totally under our control. And we’re gonna do with him as we
wish. And, right now, we wish to try him as if he was a raghead
in a cave in the tribal areas of Pakistan. So demonstrate all you
want. There’s nothing you can do about it.”
The US military/intelligence apparatus realizes in post-9/11 polit ical A merica they trump pretty much everything. They’re the
Big Dog. If it involves lethal weapons or snooping into your private life, it’s OK with them. You can’t be too safe when those al
Qaeda characters are out there and Sharia Law threatens our precious bodily fluids.
Thanks to all the revelations of Edward Snowden, who no doubt
Colonel Lind would rule was also aid ing al Qaeda, we now know
our military/intelligence apparatus was chumping the American
people. Just recall the NSA boss who stood up in Congress with
stars all over his epaulets and swore on a Bib le. I think this sums
up his testimony: “Spying on you? Us? Are you kidding? We
work for you.”
It was thanks to the devil-incarnate Snowden that the A merican
people and the world learned they’ve actually been recording and
storing the “meta-data” of our phone calls for some time — just
in case, so later when the racing technological capacity catches
up to their huge, unprecedented ocean of data on you and me
they will be able to analy ze and fiddle with all that data. Why
isn’t that very comforting?
As a journalist who writes opinion pieces like the one you are
now reading, all this is getting pretty worrisome. When you link
it with the fact a Fo x News co mmentator — Ralph Peters — is
actually pushing the idea that in the future journalists and reporters will have to be seen as “lethal co mbatants” in our wars, you
realize all this is no longer a fever d ream on the left and that
we’re really on a slippery slope. Unless someone can turn it
around, it could easily lead to a very unhealthy and dangerous
place of no return. The fever dream is now on the right, wh ich in
conjunction with a super-secret military and intelligence apparatus clearly has the power to run roughshod in the future.
To any reasonable journalist, Brad ley Manning is nothing mo re
than a whistleblo wer with an axe to grind willing to leak informat ion. This is how things evolve and change. In this view, the
widest possible sharing of informat ion is good. The idea that
Manning was “aiding the enemy” and, thus, was being subversive in a t reasonous and criminal fashion is a case of slipping
farther down that dangerous slippery slope.
In a world of super-secret military and intelligence capabilities,
on one hand, and a public pacified by marketing, public relat ions,
entertainment and special effects, on the other, the notion of democracy begins to seem a b it quaint and nostalgic.
It’s thanks to courageous people like Bradley Manning and Edward Snowden that we, the American people, know a little mo re
than we would if they had not done what they did. What they did
makes us all just a little better in formed in the arena of democracy. What they did has nothing to do with what Colonel Lind
was thinking when she charged Manning with “aiding the enemy” — ie. al Qaeda, Hezbollah or the Earth Liberat ion Front.
It’s clear who, in this case, the government, the military, the CIA
and the NSA see as “the enemy.”
It’s us.
A
Cambodian National Rescue party (CNRP). Fro m what we cam
see in Sihanoukville there seems to be only two parties
campaigning CPP & CNRP who held a few rallies thru town.
The CNRP has been ending their rallies at the Golden lions
roundabout in the early evening causing a massive blockage of
traffic at the Go lden Lions circle.
Of course the local constabulary have been instructed to take
notice of people driving with no helmets or blocking
roundabouts. In fact the police have not been sen on the streets
of Snooky at all.
No news as of yet about the serving of alcohol during the
election but we will let you know how it all went next month.
AUOS a guest house on Serendipity beach recently changed
hands but alas tragedy struck when one of the new
owners died.
He was mis-diagnosed in Snooky and taken to PP
where he unfortunately passed away. It was disclosed a
few days later in the Nat ional press that he was wanted
in Australia on charges on importing half a tonne of
cocaine with links to the Italian mafia…
On the Serendipity stretch of beach there have been
rumo rs that some of these beach business after
Aquarium will have to go. In fact what was Coasters,
Aquarium & Mango all the rooms are empty at the
mo ment any way.
Japanese Blue Ocean restaurants, three locations shit
loads of money spent and all for a school project!
There is one located on the lions roundabout one on
Beach Road and one on Occheuteal beach..........
Sihanoukville Square is staring to attract a few
customers. Roughly two thirds of the units are
occupied and trading mostly as bars with lots of
friendly girls inside. There are few eateries of which
two are open at the mo ment the Doner Kebab at the
front who now offers chicken kebabs along with the usual
option. Just behind is McGu iness Irish restaurant. Both seem
® popular and offer a decent feed at reasonable prices. Expect this
venue to be a hit in the coming high season when all units are
Adam Parker, Publisher and Editor-in-Chief
expected to be open .
A. Nonnymouse, Wordsmiths
Fishermens Den one of the longest running bars in Sihanoukville
Sharpless, Photos
has been sold, allegedly. Brian the owner who has been serving
beer and taking punters on fishing trips since 2001 has probably
Maxwell Perkins, Editor Postmortis D exter Coffin III,
Lawrence Connelly, Rich, Well-Connected Friends of Publisher
finally had enough and decided to hang up his rod.
Jeff Elson, Assoc iate Deputy Editor Dr. Safari, Health Editor
Love him or loathe him we have to say that running a bar in
Ian Velocipede, Editor-at-Large James Eckhart, Editor-at-Larger
Snooky for that length of time deserves a medal.
A. Fortiori, Dan Meat, Etta Moga, Assistant Associate Deputy Editors
Next month on the 24th August is the 6th annual poker run.
Cletus J. “Bubba” Huckabee, Jr., Movie Reviewer
Co mpeting bars are Coolabah, Beach Road ,Reef Resort, Big
Edward R. Murrow, Famous Journalist
Easy , Led Zephyr and one other which we can not mention for
Autmean Loy, Prakhai Thuich, Som Muiroi, Overworked Proles
fear of legal action!
Sdap Otbaan, Ta Madong Thiet, Translators It, Coffee
Dim Sambo, Sy stems Support Chubb, Reception
Power has been good recently a fair bit of rain but it is
brightening up nicely now.
The Bayon Pearnik is an independent magazine dedicated to raising beer
money as well as encouraging debate over standards of taste, humor and
Next to Go lden Sands the large build ing going up at the mo ment
journalistic ethics. Published every month or so in Phnom Penh. Not to be taken
is ru moured to be a proper Thai managed hospital a la Phnom
seriously or while driving or operating heavy machinery. Always consult your
Penh standard. About bloody time we had proper med ical
doctor first because we're not responsible for what happens to you.
facilit ies down here.
Adv ertising, Editorial, Inquiries and anything else :
Opposite Beach Resort the large single storey building is going
The Bayon Pearnik, P.O. Box 2279,
to be a new night market. Not a bad idea but looks like it will
Phnom Penh 3.
have the ambiance of a fish market.
Adv ertising, Editorial : 012-803- 968 (Adam),
Adv ertising: 012 887 699 Mol (KHMER/ENGLISH)
E-mail: [email protected] www.bayonpearnik.com
“We accept anybody’s ravings—we often print them!”
month of high rollers rocking into Sihanoukville.
The King and the Queen mother shortly followed by
Hun Sen. They were all here to attend a ceremony at
the container port and then go out to Otres and plant
some trees. But the Otres they went to was out at Stung Hau?
Where a dozen or so foreigners and hundreds of Khmers went
out on a very over cast morning to do the right thing. There are
very few trees in Sihanoukville (as they have cut so many down)
so it was about time some one put some back. Good bit of PR
work what with he election co ming up.
Talking of elections.
Sam Rainsy was back in Cambodia and one of his first stops was
sunny? Sihanoukville to spread the word o f h is party the
Bayon
Pearnik
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R
iver fish and other assorted forms of river life form
the basis of the Kh mer d iet, but foreigners and locals
alike know that the tastiest aquatic life d wells in the
oceans. In Phnom Penh the ocean may be 4 hours
drive away, but that doesn’t seem to prove any barrier, nor is
there a shortage of imported fish.
Arriv ing back in Phno m Penh I asked about the latest
restaurants, and one ubiquitous reply was Sushi Bar. Apparently
a chain fro m Vietnam, visions of Shabu Shabu flitter past, I
quash them and proceed with the booking. Yep. I’d been advised
to reserve a table. This was good and indeed essential advise as
they were turning people away as we arrived. We were fortunate
in that we had a table in the first section of the restaurant where
the tables follo w a wall that is
opposite the kitchen area so that
you can watch the toils of the
row of chefs as they create p late
upon plate of Japanese delights.
The majority of those
delights feature seafood, but meat
eaters and veggies are by no
means forgotten. The menu is
huge with as much choice as
anyone could need. We order a
large Bento set, a Sashimi set,
and a host of sushi dishes from
across the menu. It’s no smoking
so we move outside whilst our
order makes it through the whirlpool of activity in the kitchen.
The host on the door is in constant radio contact with staff in
the restaurant to keep track of
available tables and the staff order on small tablets. It takes a
short while before p lates start arriving, but they all arrive as ordered.
It was a meal with many highlights, the miso soup wasn’t quite one of them, but the rich flavorful b roth was tantalizing
none the less, and was quickly devoured in anticipation of the
dishes to come. The Bento bo x featured a fair selection of tempura, grilled meat and fish, Tuna sashimi, and sushi. The quality
of all is delectable, the tempura is golden and crisp and full of
fresh meat and veg, the sashimi delicate, the other assorted stuff I
couldn’t name was tasty and fresh, and the sushi fresh featuring
tender slivers of assorted fish and prawn on elongated balls of
rice. The Sashimi plate took the level up a notch with so me
thicker cut slabs of salmon, and tuna, and fresh roe with other
smaller more unusual cuts mixed in. Then the sushi began to arrive p late after plate. Fried oysters crunch and then burst with the
taste of the ocean. Rolls of varied seafood and fresh crisp veg in
soft seaweed wrappers get dunked in the obligatory wasabi soy
mix, and inexpensive Cambodia beer washes it all down. Then
there’s the tempura sushi, not traditional, but so good, it doesn’t
really matter if you’re a purist or not you’re catered for here.
So the search is over it would seem, but why not continue and see what else is out there. Naga World offer a Korean
Seafood Extravaganza every Friday in their Korean Grill restaurant. Thirty bucks with unlimited beer, twenty without. The casino is of course a grand place to arrive, but if you choose to do
so by tuc-tuc you are not deemed worthy to pull up to the doors
using their driveway. Nope, peasants walk to the door. Once in
the hunt for the restaurant begins. It’s upstairs through the Italian
restaurant, past some gaming tables, and a central platform for
singers and performers. In the end the Korean Grill v iews the
main atriu m fro m the back so you can watch the sexy dancing
girls whist getting your seafood fix.
The buffet looks like it’s been hit hard when we arrive,
a few sorry looking oysters remain on the ice, a couple of
prawns. We hesitate, but decide to proceed trusting they will
refill for us new customers. Thankfu lly they do, especially with a
few requests to the kitchen to refill the prime seafood delights
we’d co me for. The mussels return, the oysters are a little s mall,
but plenty are shucked and on
the ice, I t ry the snails and
they’re really quite good, there’s
squid and octopus. There’s then
a selection of Korean sushi, it’s
fresh tasty and well made, behind stands a chef ready to cook
you the noodle dish of your
choice, I skip that. The meat
counters next, my large friend
asks for all of it when asked how
much, we are only allo wed 2
slices of each though. Doesn’t
really matter I’m getting full
quick, and I haven’t even explored the serving trays of prepared dishes. I did of course
have some Kim Ch i and it was
spicy with plenty of tangy bite, a
must with anything Korean. Desserts were rich and tasty from
chocolate cake to cheesecake.
There’s a generous four hours to eat your meal and drink the free
flow beer. It’s less than two though before we’re co mp letely
stuffed. We could stay and drink longer, but with plans to carry
on and party that evening we pay the bill, with a hell o f a lot of
difficulty as they made mistakes with the credit card pay ment,
and leave trying not to let that dampen the mood of the evening.
Still a second seafood hit, for the most part. Search over? Nah,
let’s go to Kep.
The quiet coastal resort is famous for its crab market that features a row of restaurants built over the rocky shore.
The entire market has undergone quite a facelift, many of these
neatly lit and furnished places were simple shacks just a few
years ago. Now there are bars, and other tourist businesses
springing up in between the newly renovated restaurants. We
found Serey Pov Restaurant in the center of the strip, and again
hit gold. We were served plates of prawn and crab by the kilo.
The prawn in a simp le yet addict ively tasty garlic and chilli
sauce, and the crab with Kampot pepper. A whole fish in sweet
and sour sauce, squid and stingray comp leted the meal. The atmosphere unbeatable as the waves crash a meter belo w us, the
sea breeze cools us and the lapping and crashing of the waves
replaces any need for music, though the beats from the bar next
door are somewhat audible against the ocean’s roar.
So there you have it, if you’re in Phno m Penh you
don’t have to search hard, but if you want the best experience
you just can’t overlook the coast.
I
was thinking about how to get rid of an infestation of
Christians at a school I’m involved with ( I know there’s no
point in calling the Ro mans) and evangelicals generally and
that got me wondering about how they sell that Christian
story anyway because, if you step back a b it, you’ve got to ad mit
it’s a little weird. If you’re born into it and everybody around you
believes it then it doesn’t really matter if so me b its seem odd
because you presume somebody must have a handle on it
but if you’re t rying to convince
rational adults who never
heard it before, well it can’t be
that easy to sell.
Imagine Paddy trying to p itch
it to his friend M ick in the
Irish Film Board.
“Listen Mick, I have this great
idea for a film”
“Go ahead Paddy, I’m all
ears”.
“Right. Well you have this
kinda Superhero guy and he
knows everything because he
has a big computer chip in his
head and he’s called God”
“God”, I like that Paddy, it’s
kinda punchy”
“Yeah, and he’s got this big
garden called Eden. Now he
doesn’t live there h imself, he
has another gaff called
Heaven, right?
“With you so far Paddy”
“Okay, well one day he’s
messing about with clay and
he makes a man”
“A clay man?”
“No, no a real man. Like I said
he has these super powers. So let’s say he’s called...oh, I dunno,
let’s say Adam, yeah Adam. So God says to Adam, “Here’s a big
garden for you and I want you to look after it for me while I’m
away”.
“Grand you’re Godship, no bother”.
“But there’s one thing” says God, “D’ya see them apples over
there? Well you’re not to eat any of them, right?
“No probs” says Adam, “I’m mo re of an orange man meself” (yes, that’s where it started)
“Then” says Paddy, “God heads off back to heaven and Adam is
left pottering around in the garden”
“Ok, but why’s he not to eat the apples”.
“Well, it’s just forbidden, right?”
“I don’t really get that, Paddy, but go ahead”
“So years later God co mes back to the Garden”.
“Yo Adam” he calls, “how are they hangin?”
“Ah God, is it yourself that’s in it. Sure everything is grand.
How’s yourself?”
. “Ach, no point in complain ing, sure nobody would listen to ye.
But listen I have this great idea, I’m going to take one of your
ribs and make a wo man”.
“Eh, back up a minute there God, did you say you’re going to
take one of my ribs and make a wo man?”
“I did”
“Well Bejaysus, that’s a brilliant idea alright but could you co me
back in a couple of thousand years, I’m kinda busy at the minute”
“Ach don’t be an ould worrywart” says God, sure don’t I know
everything, it’ll all be grand”
“So then” says Paddy, “God zaps Adam, pulls out a rib and
makes a wo man”.
“He makes a wo man out of a
rib? That’s a bit far-fetched
Paddy”.
“No, stay with me here M ick.
So then God says to Adam,
Here’s a beautifu l wo man I
made to keep you company
and her name is Eve and y iz
can wander about to your
heart’s content but remember
what I said about them ap ples. Oh and yiz have to wear
a fig -leaf”.
“Adam and Eve, I like it, it
has a familiar kinda ring to it .
But why do they have to
wear a fig-leaf”
“Well, he’s not very up on
nudity; it’s just the way he is.
So Adam and Eve are having
a grand time until one day a
snake comes into the garden.
Now this lad’s name is Satan
and himself and God used to
share a gaff but God got
pissed off with him because
he was always having late
night parties and playing
Heavy Metal and taking
drugs and all that and God
liked choirs and lads playing harps and that so he threw Satan
out. And Satan had to live in a basement called Hell and it was so
damp he had to keep the fire going all the time and Satan had
sworn he’d get back at God.
So Satan goes up to Eve and tells her not to be minding God and
she should get Adam to eat the apples.
And you know yourself Mick, you can’t turn your back on a
wo man for a minute or she’ll be up to all kinds of divilment. So
she gets Adam to eat the apple”
“Yeah, but hang on, how does she get Adam to eat the apple
Paddy? You’ll have to fill that out. I mean, he’s not going to eat
it just ‘cos she says”
“You’re right there M ick, I hadn’t thought of that. M m…I know:
she accidentally on purpose drops her fig-leaf and she says,
“D’ye see this Adam? Well that’s what you’ll get if you eat an
apple”
“Oh, that would do it alright. There’s not many lads would say
no to that proposition”
“Well, God is really p issed off when he finds out and he goes
back and throws open the gates of the garden and says to Adam,
“Get out the both of yiz and your souls will burn in the fires of
hell and so will the souls of all your childer for years to come”.
“Eh, hold on a sec there Paddy, you can’t expect people to be-
lieve that, I mean; you’re saying thousands of souls have to burn
in Hell because some lad ate an apple? You’re kinda stretching
things here”
“Well, this God lad is a bit like the Incredib le Hulk, y”know,
when he’s pissed he’s really pissed. But hold
on, there’s more”.
“Ok Paddy but I have to tell you, this is getting a bit off the wall”
“Just bear with me. So after say a couple of thousand years God
starts thinking, “I’m sending all those souls down to your man
Satan and he’s just using them to keep h is fires going”
“Ha”, M ick interrupts, “I suppose you could say the fires are soular powered, d’ya get it? S O U L, soular powered.
“Ah Begob Mick, that’s a good one, you’re a gas man altogether”
“So God says to himself, “I know, I have a son lying around
somewhere doing nothing, I’ll send him off to get crucified and
everything in the garden will be rosy again”.
“Whoa Paddy, you’ll have to stop there. You expect people to
believe that God has a son that he’s going to send off to be crucified and then it’ll be ok that Adam ate an apple? That doesn’t
make any bloody sense. Well maybe it does if you’re psycho.
Tell me Paddy, are you off the tablets again”.
So you have to admit, it is a weird story. Also, I have my doubts
about the apple bit so what exactly did Adam eat? He ate what
fro m the tree of knowledge? Why was God so pissed off?
Timothy Leary suggests, somewhat jo kingly, that it was some
kind of psychotropic substance that made him smarter than God
and as soon as God knew Adam necked whatever it was you hear
the; Beee Bob, Beee Bob of police sirens; the first drugs bust in
history.
And then, how did God know anyway? I mean, if he had 24 hour
surveillance he’d have known the snake was in the garden in the
first place. Did somebody rat on Adam? Were his pupils dilated?
Did he have to give regular urine samp les? So many questions.
Being an Irishman I can tell you this tho’; that bit about throwing
open the gates and banishing Adam and Eve? That’s just a coverup. Here’s the real lowdown.
It’s universally acknowledged that Ireland was the Garden of
Eden. Proof positive being that Ireland is the only country that
the snake was driven out of. Well, when he threw open the gates
it wasn’t to banish Adam and Eve it was to let the bloody
neighbours in!
And, as many of you know, having the Eng lish move in makes
banishment look like a stroll in the garden.
Jim Kelly. July 2013