Summer 2008
South Africa, March 2008
What do all these numbers mean?!
By Patrick Barrasso, MSW, LCSW
Let’s start with 100%. This is the
percentage of parents of our graduates
who would recommend our program to
another family.
On March 12, 2008, fourteen students and two
staff left for South Africa on a twenty-two day
excursion. This trip turned out to be nothing
short of amazing and is now an indefinite part
of In Balance Ranch Academy. We will offer
this trip every March in hopes that every
student that comes through In Balance will
have the opportunity to participate in this
phenomenal experience.
This trip included: Table Mountain, Cape of
Good Hope, Robben Island, The Gardens, the
world's highest bungee jump at Bloukran's
Bridge, Khwa Tuu,
Khayelitsha, and a
safari in the
Imfolozi Animal
Park.
All of our
experiences were great and added to the
intensity of the trip, but above all Khayelitsha
stands out as the most profound moment of
the trip. For seven days the boys stayed and
worked in the Town of Khayelitsha.
Khayelitsha has a population of 1-2 million,
living on an average of one dollar per day and
has a 60% HIV infection rate.
The students were split into pairs and each
placed with a different family to live within the
community. Each morning the students would
volunteer at either an orphanage, soup kitchen,
youth center or community garden. Then they
would return to their families where they were
treated like one of their own.
cont. page 5
In a program that is family owned and
operated, I know we have to do our very
best to attend to our students’ needs and to
our families’ needs. I oversee this
program and our staff provides a standard
of care as if it were our own child and
family going through this difficult journey.
39 is the number of follow-up surveys that our data analyst, Dave Reazin, used to provide the
following results. This is formerly what he did for programs throughout the Maryland area, that
provide substance abuse and mental health treatment. If you would like the entirety of this
outcome study please email us and we will be glad to send you the entire report.
97% of our families who had their sons complete the program report that the improvements
made in the program are continuing; in some cases almost three years since graduation. You
start with a vision, dedicate your life to pulling together the best research, experience and
training and then you actualize it and it works. This number reflects the hard work and daily
commitment of our staff, students and families.
3, This number represents our alumni who were recently inducted into our legacy wall of fame.
They have dedicated themselves to their school, sobriety, family and future, but most
importantly have been instrumental in helping other youth find the road to recovery! We are so
proud of all of our alumni, but these guys have really gone above and beyond. (see page 4)
95%-96%, In the calendar year 2006-2007, this number represents the percentage of students
who came to In Balance Ranch Academy to finish their high school diploma and actually
reached that goal. This was the expected vision/goal during their time with us. Of the young
men who finished high school at In Balance Ranch Academy, 90% have gone onto college. The
following represents the list of colleges they have gone on to: Arizona State, Berkley,
University of Utah, James Madison, C.W. Post, Pacific Lutheran, Pepperdine, St. Johns
University, University of Arizona, Penn State, West Virginia University, Marymount, George
Mason, Colorado State University, Evergreen College, Northern Illinois University, Hofstra
University, Southern Oregon University, University of Mary Washington, University of
Tennessee, University of Iowa, Linfield College, Marlboro College, Randolph Macon College,
and many other institutes of higher learning.
4, This marks the years since the Ranch has opened.
18, Represent
the years since I first articulated the model for what would later become In
Balance Ranch Academy.
cont. page 4
In Balance Academics
By Lynda Hendricks, M Ed.
In Balance Ranch Academy has a lot of exciting news from the Academic Department.
The new school building is well underway and will be completed by December. The
design is beautiful and functional with a large, open meeting room to allow for all
students and parents to attend concerts, workshops and other programs. Flowing
from this central gathering space are four classrooms, a science
lab, a library, and offices for academic staff. As we move into our
fifth year as an academy, this addition to the campus will allow us
to provide a more enriched, creative and challenging curriculum
for our students.
Equally as exciting for the ranch is the recent accreditation of our academic program. The CITA/North Central Association
team visited In Balance Ranch last week to recommend accreditation to the board. The full board will meet to approve the
team’s recommendation in the next month or two. Following that official notification, In Balance will add several new
courses to the college prep diploma program offered to current students. Courses in sociology, lab science, world literature,
philosophy, advanced composition, and several more foreign language courses will be part of the planned curriculum.
We would also like to welcome a new staff member to our team. Julian Greene
comes to In Balance with a broad teaching and career background. She earned a Master’s Degree
in English with a minor in Spanish. Julian has taught middle school through college and other
adult programs including a rehabilitation center in Oakland, California. She has worked in many
alternative education settings from a one-room school house to a completely computer facilitated
classroom.
Julian’s wide-ranging career background involves program creation and direction for many
different non-profit groups. She also spent several years in publishing and in information
technology.
Julian’s own teaching and life philosophy recognizes the deep importance of spirituality, health,
and nature in creating a balanced life, and she is very excited to be a part of In Balance Ranch
Academy.
Equine Assisted Therapy
!By Shannon Dexter, LCSW, LISAC
Three times a year families will join us at the Ranch for a Family Weekend Workshop. For three and a half days they will work hard, play hard,
and experience many workshops at the Ranch which will help reframe, rebuild, and transform their relationships with their son, and often with
each other. One workshop is the Equine Therapy Experience. Part of the time is devoted to the students showing their parents and siblings the
skills and horsemanship they have learned while at the Ranch. The other part involves getting into the arena with the family and one or more
horses. The experiences unfold in often surprising ways and the processing of these can be very emotional. To help readers understand, I can
only offer to describe some of the most compelling examples of this past year. All of the names were changed to protect confidentiality.
These excerpts are from an activity I call blindfolded appendages. The student stands in the center of his family with his arms entwined with one
parent on each side. If there is a sibling, she/he is between the student and a parent. I explain that the student is the brain and the parents are the
appendages – the student cannot use his hands and the parents can only use their outside hands. The parents are then blindfolded, and as a group,
they go into the arena to catch and halter a horse. As the brain, the student has to communicate to and use only his parents’ arms.
The challenge brings out a great deal of emotion around how they see themselves, each other, the current state of their trust issues with their son,
their coping skills under stress, and the dynamics between all of the members of the family. By blindfolding the parents, the exercise also shifts
the usual dynamic of the power and control in the family. Horses are chosen that are interactive and appear to enjoy these types of activities
without becoming stressed. The horses are in a 50’X50’ arena and have the freedom to move away from any situation that is troubling to them.
This in itself creates realizations for the family.
Horses Mirror the Emotions of the Family
Horses are very sensitive to the emotions and intentions of those around them and their reactions and responses directly and immediately reflect
those back. This gives students and families the opportunity to see themselves and their interactions from a fresh perspective and re-create their
cont. page 6
pg. 2
A friend remembered…
By Close Family and Friends to Ada M.
In a twist of fate that no one could have predicted, on a faraway
continent that few travel to in their lifetime, in a meeting that could not
be scripted; fourteen young men from In Balance Ranch Academy,
shared a moment with a stranger that would become an untimely and
ironic reality for one of them.
While on a trip to South Africa in a remote village, the group attended
a meeting, focusing on the same issues that many of the young men
faced. With the meeting being translated to English for the group to
understand, a man spoke of how he lost his mother during his teenage
years. The speaker said that he made the decision the moment he lost
his mother, to cope with problems in a positive way, that he needed to
honor her memory and the sacrifices she made for him by living a full
and productive life. At that moment, the man started crying and all of
the women in the room stood and started singing over him, wishing
him peace and tranquility.
Three months later and more than 10,000 miles away from where that
meeting took place, more than 700 friends and family gathered to
mourn the death, celebrate the life and thank God they had the chance
to know Ada May M., the mother of In Balance resident Earl M. Ada
unexpectedly passed away at the young age of 47. Her passing left
many wondering why and how this could happen. The most perplexing
question is why would she be taken from her two young sons, Jackson
and Earl?
Slowly, her questions became answered. Committed to the process,
Ada participated fully in Earl's program. She talked to him as much as
she could, spent the holidays in Arizona and visited him often, taking
Jackson and her mom when possible. With each day that passed, with
each time she saw him, conversations she had with him and
conversations she shared with his counselors, she knew she was doing
the right thing. To friends and family, this was evident especially in the
final few months of her life when they would hear how good Earl was
doing - that he was smiling more, talking more, and seemed more
comfortable in his own skin. He even dared to say he was happy - and
that meant the world to her.
One of the toughest decisions in her life, most likely turned into being
one of the best gifts she could give both of her sons. To Jackson, she
gave a brother that could be strong enough to lean on during the
toughest of times. To Earl, she sacrificed her time to be with him so
that he could be in the environment to acquire the skills needed to be
the man, the friend, the brother, the grandson, the cousin, and the son
that could honor her in living a happy life.
Ada & Earl
Her family and friends will ponder this question in the days, months
and years that lie ahead. But one question they are not left wondering
is if Ada had to do it all over again, would she send Earl to In Balance
Ranch Academy for the final ten months of her life if she knew this
stretch of time would be her last on earth?
Earl, 17, Ada's youngest son and the one who would be described over
and over again as just like her, became a resident at In Balance in
August 2007. It wasn't an easy decision for Ada to make. It wasn't like
taking Jackson to college - that was the next natural step in a young
man's life. She had to make the tough emotional decision to be
separated from her youngest son and separate him from the only life
he had known to this point. But Ada also knew she needed to give him
something that she couldn't give him at home in Portland, Oregonstructure, balance and a comprehensive program that would give him
the tools to cope with the challenges of life - in a positive way.
Ada, a pillar in many circles in her life, sought solace and serenity
from many places. In recent years, Ada joined the Catholic Church
becoming a member of St. Clare’s Parish. Living a spiritual life and
building her relationship with God complemented Ada’s quest to
always become a better person. She wanted to provide the same
avenue of assistance to her son.
So last August, Ada did one of the hardest things she would have to do
as a mother, and took Earl to Arizona. Ada would question her
decision daily. Was she doing the right thing? Was this going to help
Earl? Or was he just going to resent her? Could she afford it? How
could she not see him all the time?
If you wish to give a donation to this family, please feel
free to do so. Simply visit any Washington Mutual bank and
ask to donate to the "Ada May Memorial Fund” account
# 4010659021.
pg. 3
Numbers, continued from pg. 1
Alumni Updates
12, This marks the years that In Balance Counseling has been providing services to
youth and families with substance abuse and mental health disorders.
7 is the number of masters level therapists who are there to provide and serve the needs
of the youth and family served by In Balance.
67, The number of employees In Balance has to provide the quality of care in our
Intensive Outpatient Program, Transitional Living Program, and In Balance Ranch
Academy.
132, the number of combined years our clinical staff has been providing mental health
and substance abuse treatment.
3, the number of years our Transitional Living program has been in operation. Please see
www.inbalanceliving.com for more information on our In Balance Transitional Living
program.
100% represents the number of students who graduated from the Ranch and our
Transitional Living program who are sober today.
On a personal note, 3 represents the number of my children of which I am proud to say
all 3 work for In Balance and I cannot be more happy or more proud at how they carry
the same passion for the work that I have since I started in 1981.
On March of ‘08 In Balance Ranch Academy inducted
three of its alumni into its Legacy Wall. The Legacy
Wall is meant to celebrate those alumni that have
remained sober and committed to their recovery and
have become instrumental in helping others find a
similar process of recovery.
2 represents the number of grandchildren Betsy and I have now.
Peter D. is “living a life that I never dreamt possible.”
Peter graduated our Transitional Living Program and
is an incredibly gifted staff and student. Working for
both our Transitional Living Program and Ranch while
attending the University of Arizona.
We continue to be grateful for all who have supported the work of serving youth and
families. We are starting our second and even more comprehensive round of follow-up
studies and will keep you posted on what we find as the graduate pool becomes larger to
draw data from.
Jeff C. has since graduated our Transitional Living
Program and has become one of In Balance’s most
beloved staff, working at both the outpatient program
and the Ranch. He continues to have aspirations of
becoming a therapist.
If you have not seen us lately please come out and take a look. In Balance Ranch
Academy continues to provide clinically sophisticated evidence based treatment
for both mental health and substance abuse related issues for youth and families
and now now has the state of the art facilities to compliment our treatment and
our academic program. !
Rob S. has moved back to the east coast to be closer to
his family. He continues to be an advocate and a role
model within the AA community. He is now in his
third year of college and hopes to become a therapist
and continue to give back.
I can go on, but
numbers sometimes can be boring so I wanted to highlight the important ones.
Important Announcements:!
We are so pleased to announce the opening of our new In Balance Treatment Center at the Ranch. After six months of
construction, this building is the perfect space to provide the best in clinical treatment. The State of Arizona
Office of Behavioral Health agrees because they issued our license to operate. It truly came out amazing! We
wish to extend our deepest gratitude to John Kline of Kline Custom Homes for creating this top notch facility.!
Also, our new school building should be complete by December 2008. (See Lynda’s article) Yet, we have been
approved for our CITA North Central accreditation.!
Thank you all for your support with these projects. We prayed the projects would be complete within our first 10
years and thanks to all of you we are 6 years ahead of schedule. We continue to strive to provide the best
setting for our students and families. Special thanks goes out Leon & Kathy Pyle.!
pg. 4
South Africa, continued from pg. 1
Seven days does not seem like a long time but by the end of our time there our students already had
Kosa names (main language of this particular township), and tears in their eyes as they said
goodbye to their respective families and co-workers.
Letter by a friend from South Africa
Our students came to realize that although the people we experienced in this South African
township had a past filled will incredible pain and a present filled with absolute inequities, their
future can still be one of hope. A lesson that most of our students have since tried to implement
within their own lives.
Today we continue our relationship with Sinethemba through both planning of future trips and
current fund-raising efforts. As a result of such efforts Sinethemba plans on building a permanent
concrete addition to their youth center/orphanage, which is currently plywood and tin.
This South Africa trip will occur every March. We also plan on adding a similar service oriented
excursion to India later in 2009. With the two trips running annually every student that comes
through In Balance will have the opportunity to experience one.
“We showed up pitying them
and left respecting and
almost envying them.”- In
Balance Ranch Academy
Student
“Hey Dude!! Hope you are alright,
everyone has been talking about you guys
non stop since you left. Words can't explain
how much it sucks without you here I wish
I could talk to the guys more often but I
don't have a pc so it's kinda hard to keep in
touch. You guys absolutely have to come
back. I'm not good with words but I guess
what I’m tryin to say is I miss you guys and
wish you never left.
-David."
Change
By Dylan F., In Balance Alumni
This has been the most eye opening experience that has occurred in my life. I am so happy for the
opportunity that I was able to have to go visit South Africa. I chose to make my experience one of
learning, open mindedness, gratefulness, happiness, and every other emotion and feeling that I had
in South Africa. The trip taught me of the impact I can make in this world and how important I can
be. Before I went on the trip, I did not know why I was on this earth. After the trip I know exactly
why I am here. To make this planet a safe place, by doing my part and helping wherever I can so
that in some way I can have an impact on everyone around me. My help starts by writing this letter. My dream is a world where everyone is
treated equal, and where everyone lives in happiness and with content. This can't happen until change occurs. People are living in the most
gruesome conditions and do not have the basic necessities of life. My plan is to make it so that every person on this earth has at least the basic
necessities. Also, I did not know how the people living in these conditions could find happiness. I did not know until I walked in their shoes. I
was put in one of these extremely poverty ridden communities, and lived there for a week. I learned that happiness is not in money, or cars, or
anything, but true happiness is found internally. These people were happy because they were trying to make a difference in their lives' and the
people's lives surrounding them. Although they lived on a dollar a day, some of them were still able to run soup kitchens out of their houses and
support up to hundreds of kids. Why? Because they care. They care about their brothers and sisters and they are trying to help each other out.
One single tabloid of a celebrity can reach up to five million dollars. People should spend less time worrying about what Brittney Spears is doing
with her life and worry about the people who are dying of starvation and of deadly diseases. People need to learn that the change starts with
everyone starting to care more about the world they live in, instead of spending five dollars on bag of chips and a drink when you don't need
them, give it to charity. That five dollars could be used to save lives. To give kids a lunch or a dinner that they would not have normally had. The
solution is so simple but yet so hard. People need to open their eyes and realize what is happening in this world. So how do I plan to help the
community? I plan to preach the word. To be part of this solution. To spread the word of care, because change is going to happen when people
hear what the problem is, and how easy of a solution it is. If I tell twenty people about what I wrote in this letter maybe two will listen and
actually continue to spread the word. Then they each tell twenty and two more people will pick it up. So far, just by taking five minutes out of my
day to teach others, six more people know the severity of this problem. Also there are six more people who can preach the word and teach
another six. After a little bit of time a whole lot of people will know what is happening in this world and some will want to help. This is hopefully
when change will occur.
Equine, continued from pg. 2
lives and relationships differently. An example to illustrate this is as follows: Tanner’s father, Bob, a successful business man, is in charge in
most areas of his life. Bob was controlling of his home and family and Tanner had come to the Ranch with severe depressive and anxiety
symptoms, weak self-concept, and drug use. Tanner’s mom, Heidi, tended to be passive and disconnected when Bob became tense, she was also
fairly depressed. At the time of this exercise, Tanner was closing in on graduation. His mom and dad were outwardly expressing readiness,
while showing a great deal of anxiety about the transition.
In the equine arena, Bob was feeling very anxious about being blindfolded around the horses. His usual way of coping with this was to become
irritable and demanding. He began to act this out and Heidi began to disconnect and shut down. It looked as if the old dynamic might play out
again. Tanner stayed very calm, strong, and centered. He communicated well and did not shut down or quit when his father was irritable. He
engaged both of his parents, stayed focused on solving the problem, while challenging them to push through their emotions to function as a
family.
In processing, Tanner talked about how, in the past his father would start to become irritable and then “go off.” Tanner said he used to shut down
and disconnect, like his mom. Bob said he was frustrated in the exercise but Tanner reassured him, encouraged him, and he remembered from
last family weekend that he could calm himself instead of escalating. This time, Bob stopped, breathed and calmed himself, and focused back on
the activity. Heidi felt good that she did not react to Bob’s initial tension; she was able to stay present, and keep listening and functioning to
work with Tanner on the solution.
These experiences can be used to discuss recovery, coping skills for anxiety, effective communication, and Tanner’s transition home. The skills
the family had used in the exercise were skills they can use in their relationship, rather than reacting and micromanaging. The parents were
amazed that Tanner stayed so calm, strong, and centered; they continue to see and experience Tanner differently and this gives them the sense of
confidence and trust they need in order to handle his transition.
Horses Highlight the Way the Family Functions Under Stress
During another session, one family realized how they function under stress. A student, Jack, was quickly overwhelmed by his parents’ arguing,
and struggled to communicate at all. As he felt more and more hopeless and could not direct the activity, the parents’ cycle escalated. They
became frustrated that he was frozen and unable to function, not realizing their part in it. Because they had listened to other family’s experiences,
Jack’s parents realized they caused their son’s shutting down and that they need to change their interactions in order to help their son move
forward in his life. This was a profound realization and has guided a great deal of change for the family since this experience.
The Family Recreates Their Roles and Rules in the Arena
After some struggles another student, Luke announced, “this is impossible.” His mom began to coach and tried to take over even though she
couldn’t see what to do. His step-father looked frustrated and irritable, though he chose to shut down and withdraw as mom began to overfunction. Luke pushed through his frustration and hopelessness and felt great when they completed the task.
In processing, mom said Luke has quit “everything in his life” and she always feels hopeless, panicked and then she begins to over-function.
She also noticed that she could not understand what he was trying to say to her. I reflected that when she’s in that over-functioning, panicky
mode, it is hard for her to hear. She became tearful and shared how that has defined her life. I asked what the step-father felt when Luke
expressed hopelessness. He said, “anger” and admitted that their physical fights always stemmed from those times. We discussed how in the
midst of helplessness, we often act out by trying to regain power. Luke had learned this about himself in our Trauma Recovery Group and he
could relate that his step-father’s anger and controlling behavior stemmed from the same place as his own. This was an important moment for
them to begin to understand how similar their feelings and reactions truly are. This realization has been the foundation for a very important
healing in their relationship. The step-father also talked about feeling he had to set boundaries because mom would be caretaking and rescuing
and Luke was not learning to be responsible. As we concluded the processing, I asked them to notice how they felt when Luke stayed with the
activity and didn’t stop until it was completed. They realized they felt a great sense of relief and hope.
The Horses Help Families See and Celebrate Their Transformations
Mark was very calm, focused, and communicative with his parents and very caring towards his horse as well. They functioned well and in
processing, mom said that being blindfolded was a great experience of “surrender” which was her goal for the day. She said letting go and
trusting Mark rather than controlling and micromanaging him, felt very good. Dad said he felt himself wanting to take over and rescue, but
couldn’t, so he too had to trust and relax. He said he felt great when they were able to do so well as a family.
In summary, the horses provide a unique perspective on our internal emotional processes and our interactions within the family. They mirror our
individual emotions as well as the overall emotional tenor of the family. They play out the roles and rules we have often effectively hidden from
ourselves for many years. They open us up to the possibilities of being more genuine and close with those we care about the most. They also
help show us ways of being together that are healthier, more productive, and more harmonious. With our horses as co-therapists and the arena as
our office, our students and their families have the opportunity to experience profound realizations and dramatic therapeutic growth and change.
The Ranch Hand is published semi-annually by In Balance Ranch Academy. Please visit our website at www.inbalranch.com for the
latest information about our services. Admissions questions may be directed to Betsy Barrasso at (520) 722-9631.
pg. 6