Qualification
Accredited
GCSE (9–1)
Exemplar Candidate Work
ENGLISH
LITERATURE
J352
For first teaching in 2015
Merchant of Venice
– Shakespeare
Version 1
www.ocr.org.uk/english
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Contents
Script A – Level 4
4
Script B – Level 1
7
Script C – Levels 59
Script D – Level 413
Script E – Level 2
17
Script F – Level 3
20
2
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Extract-based questions
In the specimen paper this extract from the first scene
shows that the friendship of Antonio and Bassanio
is the mainspring of the plot. Antonio asks Bassanio
about Portia and about a ‘secret pilgrimage’ of love.
Bassanio instead replies by talking about money, and
he combines both love and money when explaining
all he owes to Antonio. From the beginning of the
play, different kinds of love and money have become
entangled, and Antonio’s promise to unlock his ‘purse’
and his ‘person’ to aid Bassanio’s adventures leads
directly to the bond, and its near-fatal consequences.
It is important when answering these questions
to maintain a balance between the Assessment
Objectives. These are:
AO1: Read, understand and respond to texts: maintain
a critical style; develop an informed personal
response; use textual references, including quotations,
to support and illustrate interpretations.
AO2: Analyse the language, form and structure used
by a writer to create meanings and effects, using
relevant terminology where appropriate.
Discursive essay questions
AO3: Show understanding of the relationships
between texts and the contexts in which they were
written.
This type of question gives candidates an opportunity
to explore a key character, relationship or theme by
exploring at least two moments in the play in detail.
As the Assessments Objectives are the same as for
the extract-based question, it is also important to
explore contextual influences and to look closely at
Shakespeare’s language and dramatic techniques.
Effective quotation is important to show knowledge
and understanding.
AO4: Use a range of vocabulary and sentence
structures for clarity, purpose and effect, with accurate
spelling and punctuation.
AOs 1 and 2 are dominant. This means that responses
need to be well-argued and carefully supported in
relation to the whole question. It is a good idea to
divide time equally between the extract, which allows
AO2 to be addressed through careful attention to
language and dramatic structure, and the rest of the
play, which allows candidates to construct a wholetext response based on reference and argument. It
helps to have a particular scene or couple of scenes
in mind for comparison/connection. AO3 will be
implicit in the question, and may be addressed by
exploring the differences between the expectations
of Shakespeare’s audience and the way modern-day
directors and audiences might respond.
This question is actually very specific, and not just
a global question on Shylock. It is important to be
aware of why money is so important to Shylock,
and to be aware of the restrictions on Jews in the
sixteenth century and why usury is the opportunity
for him to achieve security. Shylock's preoccupation
with his house, his jewels, his money and his
possessions reflect his existence on the margins of
Venetian society, as the laws expounded by Portia
make very clear. Good scenes to choose would have
been Shylock’s first appearance in 1.3, his response to
Jessica’s flight in 3.3 and/or the trial scene, 4.1.
3
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script A
Page 1 of 2
. . . continued
4
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script A
Page 2 of 2
5
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script A
Examiner commentary
Script A begins by identifying the ‘brotherly
companionship’ of Antonio and Bassanio, and
immediately references another key scene (Act 4
Scene 1, the ‘trial’ scene). AO1 is powerfully addressed
by highlighting the moment when Bassanio says he
would sacrifice his wife for his friendship. AO2 might
have been addressed too, if a quotation had been
used as an example of Bassanio’s characteristically
hyperbolic form of expression. This would also
have been a good moment to introduce AO3. The
‘sexuality of Antonio’ is brought into the debate, as an
explanation for a friendship which often seems onesided. However, it would be wise to explain that there
is a difference between the convention of sentimental
friendships between men in the Renaissance and the
way modern directors might treat the relationship
today.
Cross-reference to earlier moments in the scene lead
to further explorations of the ways in which Bassanio
might be exploiting Antonio’s love for him. There is
a very apt personal response to Antonio’s evasive
response in the lines of the play. The evidence of
Antonio’s love for Bassanio is evaluated critically, as is
the way Bassanio demonstrates his love for Antonio
by responding to his letter and being prepared to
‘sacrifice everything’ in order to try to save his friend.
This point is well-made and supported (AO1), and
it would have been even stronger if it had been
emphasised that Portia hears what Bassanio says
to Antonio in the trial scene, and makes her own
comment.
The final comment shows the candidate has an open
mind on the dynamics of this friendship and how it
could be portrayed. The ‘difference between love and
friendship’ might have been explored more deeply
through a closer look at the language of money
which surrounds it in this scene and later (AO2) and
more reference to the ways in which the friendship
drives the ‘merry bond’ and ‘ring’ plots, having
intervened just after the ‘casket’ scene. The play can’t
close until Portia has once again ‘bound’ Antonio to
reassure herself of Bassanio’s loyalty.
The one-sided nature of the friendship becomes a
good way for the candidate to explore language,
notably Antonio’s reference to ‘my purse, my person’.
Here AO2 is addressed, as are the consequences when
this is translated into the ‘bond’ (AO1). There is a direct
link to Antonio’s willingness to deal with Shylock and
there is a comparison between what Bassanio later
swears, and how much he really sacrifices for Antonio.
The next paragraph addresses sexuality in terms
that are historically appropriate and supported by
the language of the text, pointing out Bassanio’s
relative youth through an appropriate reference to
the language of his extended simile in the passage
(AO2). For more acknowledgement of AO3, it might
have been a good idea to pick up on the aristocratic
pursuits of the penniless ‘Lord’ Bassanio in contrast to
Antonio’s new money private enterprise.
All the requirements of Level 3 are covered by this
response. Indeed it edges into low Level 4: there is
some critical style and relevant textual references are
well-chosen to support the argument. More analytical
comment on poetic language and dramatic structure,
using the extract as a springboard to explore patterns
later in the play, and more use of subject terminology
and understanding of context would have given this
response the ‘credible critical style’ required for higher
Level 4.
6
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script B
Page 1 of 1
7
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Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script B
Examiner commentary
Script B is a more straightforward response
but nevertheless shows good knowledge and
understanding. The nature of the bond is understood,
and the ways in which it interweaves friendships,
love and money (AO1). Once again the trial scene is
referenced, although a quotation is lacking.
The major weakness of this response is that it does
not address AO2, which should have been possible
through some study of the language of the extract. A
secondary weakness is the lack of explicit contextual
comment (AO3). This could easily have been added
with reference to the social conventions of courtship,
which is the reason why Bassanio needs a loan, or the
Christian objection to usury, which is why Antonio is
reluctant to go to Shylock.
There is some exploration of the nature of the
debts owed by both Bassanio and Antonio, and
it would have been good to have linked those
financial debts to emotional debts. There seems
to be a bit of confusion about Antonio’s financial
affairs and it would have been better to have linked
these to the need to borrow from Shylock in order
to establish the importance of the friendship for
that element of the play.
This response meets all the criteria for Level 1, and
meets some Level 2 criteria for AO1, despite the
lack of quotation. However, it would be awarded a
mark at the top of Level 1 because of the lack of
any explicit comment on AO2 and AO3. Although
AO3 is weighted less heavily and does not need to
be explicitly referenced for Level 2, AO2 does, and
candidates must be advised to make good use of the
extract printed on the paper.
8
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script C
Page 1 of 3
. . . continued
9
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script C
Page 2 of 3
. . . continued
10
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script C
Page 3 of 3
11
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script C
Examiner commentary
The theme of the bond is developed in a paragraph
on the trial scene which tellingly suggests that
Antonio is now finally seen by Bassanio as a ‘dear
companion’ rather than a ‘personal bank account’.
His willingness to ‘lose all’ is now feelingly analysed,
although again its dramatic context, in front of the
disguised Portia, might have been acknowledged.
Script C is a well-written and very fluent response
which immediately addresses the question in a
discursive style. It presents a strongly personal, wellargued and carefully supported response showing
good all-round knowledge of the play. It is especially
effective as a character study of Bassanio, but its
penultimate paragraph also investigates the selfsacrificing nature of Antonio. Two elements might
strengthen the response further: a greater sense
of theatricality, with an appreciation of the ways
in which honour and friendship are expressed in
the play through extravagant language – which is
especially evident in this scene – and more awareness
of how audiences today and in Shakespeare’s day
might judge the friendship, bringing the opportunity
to address AO3 much more explicitly.
Exploration of Antonio’s language (AO2), especially
the imagery of ‘all of his heart’ is especially effective,
and leads to a judgement on Bassanio which is
severe on his initial motivation but generous to his
development as a character through his friendship
with Antonio and therefore identifies ways in which
the drama progresses.
This response certainly merits a mark at the top of
Level 5. With a wider range of references and more
focused use of subject terminology (AO2) to address
the theatrical context and hyperbolic expression of
the language of friendship, this would have achieved
Level 6.
This response immediately opens up the question to
ask whether Bassanio is ‘looking out for his own selfish
needs’. This confident approach to the wider issues
raised by the task (AO1) is exactly what is needed, but
should spring more directly from the language of the
extract, perhaps by making more direct reference
to how Bassanio admits to having ‘disabled mine
estate’. This would allow Bassanio’s aristocratic status
to be addressed (AO3). There is scope to contrast
with the more mercantile vocabulary of ‘a noble rate’,
‘warranty’ and ‘adventuring’ which suggest an appeal
to Antonio’s status as a venture capitalist rather than
as a friend.
The second paragraph acknowledges that he is a
‘prodigal spender’ and makes a sharp comment
on the way Bassanio prioritises ‘money’ when he
enumerates what he owes Bassanio (AO2). The
comparison to his first description of Portia is an
apt one. The next paragraph neatly contrasts the
‘unwavering’ nature of Antonio’s love for Bassanio.
Offering his ‘person’ is certainly interesting, and
suggests the strength of his feelings. This is also
sensitively linked to his words at the opening of the
play. It might have been linked explicitly to the ‘pound
of flesh’ and Antonio’s willingness to put himself at
the mercy of Shylock.
12
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script D
Page 1 of 3
. . . continued
13
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script D
Page 2 of 3
. . . continued
14
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script D
Page 3 of 3
15
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script D
Examiner commentary
The sharp contrast with the lighter, bantering mood
of Act 1 Scene 1 is noted, and used to explore the
extract further and analyse what it reveals about the
nature of their friendship. The ‘dramatic change of
mood’ in the trial scene is aptly noted, along with
the increase in intensity of language (AO2). The
unequal nature of the friendship up to this point is
certainly noted, but it changes at this moment, and
the implications for Bassanio’s marriage to Portia and
consequently for the ending of the play might have
been pursued further. Otherwise the centrality of the
friendship to the plot, and its complex nature is well
understood.
Script D begins by identifying Act 4 Scene 1 for
comparison, and while the discursive approach shown
by Script C is the best, selection of an individual scene
and perhaps a particular speech or exchange is a
good way to move out from the printed extract. The
two scenes are singled out for the way in which they
present friendship and sacrifice.
There is detailed analysis of a single phrase ‘I
owe the most in money and in love’, with some
very effective word-level analysis (AO2). Here too,
language might have been more explicitly linked
to the language of financial transaction. There is
some exploration of what Bassanio might mean by
‘love’ but this needs more awareness of context.
The same applies to the analysis of what Antonio
is prepared to sacrifice in the trial scene, where the
religious references are significant (AO3). However,
quotation supports an individual argument very
effectively indeed here (AO1).
This is a mid Level 4 response with a credible critical
style, showing a detailed personal response to both
text and task, although both analysis and clarity of
understanding of context could be improved.
16
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script E
Page 1 of 2
. . . continued
17
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script E
Page 2 of 2
18
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script E
Examiner commentary
Script E shows some explicit understanding of
context and appreciation of the topic of usury (AO3).
The second paragraph points out that Shylock’s
wealth is essential to his self-respect. Like many
modern directors, the student locates Shylock’s
growing obsession with revenge on Antonio in 3.3,
and links it to his grief at Jessica’s desertion (with
some of his money) (AO1). This is a good start and
should have been followed up by some explicit
consideration of Shylock’s language and its effect
on the audience (AO2). The exchange with Tubal is
especially revealing here.
This is the beginning of a response, lacking
development and detail. However, there is enough
understanding of not only the plot but key (and
complex) issues for the top of Level 2. Relevant
textual references and quotations are essential for
Level 3.
The next paragraph alludes to the trial scene and
Shylock’s refusal of Portia’s offer. The obsession
with Antonio is evident here, and the point might
have been made that in this instance the money is
actually less important to Shylock than justice, or he
would not have insisted on the bond (AO1). There
is an understanding that the ‘legal and emotional’
battle with Antonio is about more than money,
and here too an explanation of the importance of
settling scores, and justifying usury might have led to
reference back to 1.3.
19
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script F
Page 1 of 2
. . . continued
20
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script F
Page 2 of 2
21
GCSE (9–1) English Literature
Merchant of Venice – Shakespeare – Exemplar Candidate Work
Script F
Examiner commentary
A forceful and individual argument emerges with
textual support (AO1), and there is an appropriate
contrast with attitudes to racism today. Shakespeare’s
portrayal of Shylock is a little more complex than is
presented here, but his obsession with money at the
expense of personal relationships is certainly at odds
with the comic conventions within which the play
must operate.
Script F presents an argument based around the
racial stereotypes common in Shakespeare’s day
(AO3). There is a brief and supported overview of 3.3
in order to provide specific examples. Reference back
to 1.3 is also effective, with an explanation of ‘usance’.
Quotation supports the argument (AO1) but there is a
need for more analysis of details of the writing (AO2),
or of dramatic form. For example, the alternative
interpretations of scripture might have been explored
to give evidence of Shylock’s delight in seeing money
‘breed’.
This is a Level 3 response, as it is reasonably
developed, relevantly supported and informed by
context.
The candidate then returns to 3.3, and the structure
of this response might have been more considered.
There is appreciation of Shylock’s rhetoric in 3.3
and of his claim that he is defending his nation. A
contrast with Tubal’s attitude might have balanced
this. While it is true that Shakespeare supports certain
stereotypes of the time, he also challenges them,
not least in the portrayal of Tubal and Jessica, whose
attitude towards money seems less tight fisted and
who consequently have a better sense of humour.
22
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