WW1 and its aftermath - resource
package A
A-level English Literature A (7712)
For teaching from September 2015
We have developed a range of resources to help you plan your teaching and to create practice
exam questions for each component of A-level English Literature A. In this package, you will find a
variety of resources related to WW1 and its aftermath, including:
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creating your own questions guidance document, which gives you the power to create your
own practice exam questions
sample assessment materials, which include question papers and mark schemes
specimen question commentaries, which explain how a question taken from the sample
assessment materials addresses the assessment objectives, and which give some suggestions
of how the task might be approached
exemplar student responses with marking commentary, including two responses of different
mark bands are given to a specific question from the sample assessment materials.
Resources in this package
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Creating your own questions - Paper 2A, Section B - Unseen text
Creating your own questions - Paper 2A, Section B - Comparative texts
Exemplar student response - Paper 2A, Section B - Unseen text - band 3 - Fly Away Peter
Exemplar student response - Paper 2A, Section B - Unseen text - band 5 - Fly Away Peter
Specimen question commentary - Paper 2A, Section B, Unseen text - Fly Away Peter
Exemplar student response - Paper 2A, Section B - Comparative texts - band 2 - My Boy
Jack, All Quiet on the Western Front
Exemplar student response - Paper 2A, Section B - Comparative texts - band 5 - My Boy
Jack, All Quiet on the Western Front
Specimen question commentary - Paper 2A, Section B, Comparative texts - My Boy Jack,
All Quiet on the Western Front
How to use these resources
These documents are clearly an excellent starting point when planning your teaching. If you
haven’t yet decided on which texts or text combinations to teach, the specimen mark scheme give
you details about some of the aspects of WW1 and its aftermath the texts cover, which can help
you decide. Don’t forget to consult the specification for a list of possible aspects. Once you have
decided, these documents will help you to focus your teaching on those aspects and to work
towards the relevant exam question in the specimen assessment materials. The exemplar student
responses with marking commentary act as models for the students and help you to assess their
work.
Version 0.2
First published 12/05/2015. Last updated 12/05/2015.
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England and Wales (number 3644723). Our registered address is AQA, Devas Street, Manchester M15 6EX.
Creating your own questions
A-level English Literature A (7712)
WW1 and its aftermath – resource package A
For teaching from September 2015
Introduction
Below you will find instructions on how to use the accompanying resources to create your own
exam practice questions. This example shows you how to use the WW1 and its aftermath resource
package A to set questions for Paper 2A, Section B.
Paper 2A, Section B, unseen text
If you have used the relevant questions from the specimen assessment materials or want to set a
question on a different unseen extract, you can use these documents in the following way:
1. Look at how the relevant questions from the specimen assessment materials are constructed,
for example:
Explore the significance of suffering in this extract. Remember to include in your answer relevant
detailed analysis of the ways that Malouf shapes meanings.
When setting a different extract, the question wording can remain unchanged with the exception of
the area to be explored in the extract (here ‘suffering’) and the extract writer’s name (here
‘Malouf’).
2. Look for an extract which includes a key area of WW1 and its aftermath; ideas for areas to
explore can be found in the specification. This is important if you want students to go on to
compare the significance of this area in two other texts as practice for the second question in
Section B. Possible sources include:
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extracts from any of texts on the WW1 and its aftermath set text list
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extracts from other texts which explore this period
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remember to set extracts from literary prose as the unseen text in the examination will
always be in this form.
This resource is part of the WW1 and its aftermath resource package A.
Version 0.2. First published 06/02/2015. Last updated 12/05/2015.
AQA Education (AQA) is a registered charity (number 1073334) and a company limited by guarantee registered in
England and Wales (number 3644723). Our registered address is AQA, Devas Street, Manchester M15 6EX.
Creating your own questions
A-level English Literature A (7712)
WW1 and its aftermath – resource package A
For teaching from September 2015
Introduction
Below you will find instructions on how to use the accompanying resources to create your own
exam practice questions. This example shows you how to use the WW1 and its aftermath resource
package A to set questions for Paper 2A, Section B.
Paper 2A, Section B, comparative texts
If you have used the relevant questions from the specimen assessment materials or want to set a
question on a different text combination or a different aspect of WW1 and its aftermath, you can
use these documents in the following way:
1. Look at how the relevant questions from the specimen assessment materials are constructed,
for example:
‘Suffering in war comes in many different forms.’
Compare the significance of suffering in two other texts you have studied. Remember to include in
your answer reference to how meanings are shaped in the texts you are comparing.
The question wording (Compare the significance of…you are comparing) can remain unchanged
with the exception of the area to be explored (here ‘suffering’). You will need, however, to
construct a different ‘view’ depending upon the aspect of WW1 and its aftermath you want the
students to explore.
2. Read the specimen question commentaries to help you construct a different ‘view’ to debate.
Other sources can be used to construct a view, for example:
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look for aspects of WW1 and its aftermath which occur in the texts but don’t forget that the
absence of aspects in a text is equally valid for debate.
•
look at the list of areas to explore for WW1 and its aftermath in the specification and make
up a critical view around one of these
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research critical views on this text around which to structure a debate
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England and Wales (number 3644723). Our registered address is AQA, Devas Street, Manchester M15 6EX.
•
research critical views on another text about ‘WW1 and its aftermath’ (non-set texts
included) and adapt the quote in a more general sense so that students can consider how
far this can be said to be true of the two texts they have studied.
This resource is part of the WW1 and its aftermath resource package A.
Version 0.2. First published 06/02/2015. Last updated 12/05/2015.
AQA Education (AQA) is a registered charity (number 1073334) and a company limited by guarantee registered in
England and Wales (number 3644723). Our registered address is AQA, Devas Street, Manchester M15 6EX.
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Exemplar student response and
examiner commentary
A-level English Literature A (7712)
WW1 and its aftermath – resource package A
For teaching from September 2015
Introduction
Below you will find an exemplar student response to a Section B question in the specimen
assessment materials, followed by an examiner commentary on the response.
Paper 2A, Section B, unseen text, Fly Away Peter
Read the insert carefully. It is taken from the novel Fly Away Peter by David Malouf, published in
1982. In this scene Jim, the protagonist, visits his comrade Eric who has been badly wounded in a
recent battle. In the battle their mutual friend, Clancy, was killed. Eric wants to know who will care
for him after the war now that he is severely disabled.
[Specimen insert, beginning ‘What scared him now . .’]
Explore the significance of suffering in this extract. Remember to include in your answer relevant
detailed analysis of the ways that Malouf shapes meanings.
Band 3 response
This extract is very moving, mainly because a man who is presumably fit and able-bodied feels
awkward visiting a former army comrade who is suffering with injuries he got during the war. Jim
struggles with his feeling of guilt:-
‘He promised he would (come again) . . . but knew that he would not’
and has feelings of ‘hot panic’ that might increase Eric’s fear and worry about his future.
Malouf helps us to understand the two different kinds of suffering represented in the extract by
presenting the narrative from each man’s point-of-view in turn. The opening,
‘What scared him now . . over the dry lips.’
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is from Eric’s perspective, but by the end we are seeing things through Jim’s eyes,
‘As he walked away . . the harshness of his own words.’
This change of perspective not only links to Jim’s departure from the hospital it also explains how
Jim feels so distant from Eric. Jim feels he cannot help Eric who is beginning to repel him, like a
‘querulous old man’ whose ‘insistent’ questions he cannot cope with. In his heart of hearts Jim
knows that Eric is right. Eric’s body has been so badly damaged by his experiences that he will be
in a bed or chair for the rest of his life, but Jim cannot be cruel and openly agree with him, so he
says ‘No’ and talks about the care he should get from his nurses. Eric wants reassurance. ‘Wilya
come again, Jim?’ he asks, and then says ‘Wilya?’ twice more. But all Jim replies with is a vague
‘You’ll be alright’, repeated, and ‘Of course they will’ which is a repetition of ‘They’re bound to’
which he said earlier.
One of the interesting things about this extract is Clancy. Both Jim and Eric would like their former
comrade-in-arms Clancy being with them now as he was someone who has the courage of his
convictions and would not take no for an answer, unlike the two of them. It seems to suggest both
Eric and Jim are both probably just teenagers and therefore unworldly unlike Clancy, and this
leaves both of them feeling helpless and scared in their situation.
Malouf’s language use in this extract is straightforward. There are no flowery descriptions but
simple adjectives like ‘dry’, ‘thin’ and ‘startled’, although when it comes to feelings he uses complex
words like ‘aggrieved’, ‘querulous’ and ‘impersonal’. There is also slang e.g. ‘piss’ and words
written as they sound, like ‘Y’reckon’ and ‘Wilya’, all of which add to the drama of the scene with
realistic conversation. Malouf also uses a metaphor:‘Jim knew his own hot panic had invaded the room.’
‘Invaded’ is a brilliant way of showing how Jim feels he can’t control his emotions and ‘hot panic’
shows how uncontrollable they are. He wishes he could control himself because it is not helping
Eric at all. And you know about Eric’s panic from the ‘fine line of sweat’ on his upper lip which looks
like a moustache.
The novel ‘Fly Away Peter’ was written in 1982 and therefore is not like contemporary accounts of
the First World War by poets like Owen and Sassoon or Remarque in ‘All Quiet On The Western
Front’. But it seems convincing as a conversation that might take place between two soldiers who
fought together but are now having to live through the suffering that follows and somehow find
comfort. It mentions the people who are responsible for looking after wounded soldiers, ‘the sisters
who ran the ward’, and the men who were in charge when Eric and Jim were in uniform, ‘the
sergeant and the sergeant major’. These people plus the ‘matron at the orphanage’ represent
authority figures that a boy like Eric would look up to and rely on in a different way from how
Clancy could help, but they all add to the context of the novel.
In conclusion, this extract is about different forms of suffering. Eric suffers in his body; as
mentioned earlier he cannot stand up even. But he also suffers from a ‘problem’ in his mind,
namely fear:
‘What scared him was that people might walk off and forget him altogether.’
On the other hand, Jim is suffering from guilt and from feeling inadequate in this situation he finds
himself in where a friend wants to be comforted but he can’t do it. Jim’s suffering comes out at the
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end, after he has left the hospital, when he cries for the first time since he was a boy, because he
is ashamed of himself for being weak, and ‘harsh’ when he spoke to Eric.
Examiner commentary
AO1
‘Quality of argument’ does not apply here so much as it does with questions that require
candidates to engage in a debate about their reading of prescribed texts. Examiners are
nevertheless looking for evidence of the ability to shape a discussion informed by ideas that are
relevant and organised. This script has a fair amount of relevant material, but despite a promising
opening it is not particularly well organised and often awkwardly expressed. The vocabulary tends
to be simple and the punctuation inconsistent.
AO2
The candidate is certainly willing to analyse relevant meanings and the writer’s methods, as
required by the question. (S)he looks at narrative and aspects of dialogue, point-of-view, various
language features and setting. There is appreciation of the dynamic of the extract and of the
characters of Eric and Jim, and of the nature of their respective ‘suffering’ (see also AO5).
AO3
There is some straightforward awareness of the problems faced by those wounded in combat
which include physical disability and mental anguish, and of comradeship and mutual dependency
among serving men. More specifically, there is some awareness of the context of time.
AO4
An awareness of structure and point of view enable the candidate to see some connections within
the text. More importantly for AO4, a valid point is made about the difference between literature
written at the time of WW1 – or at least by those involved in it – and something written sixty years
after the event, although the point is not developed. By writing about war-related suffering,
however, the student has connected with the concept of suffering as it is presented more widely in
literature of the period.
AO5
Some progress is made towards an interpretation of the words and actions of the characters,
although in lieu of detailed analysis we are often given only straightforward description or
quotations without comment.
Overall: ‘This response seems to fit into Band 3’
This resource is part of the WW1 and its aftermath resource package A.
Version 0.2
First published 06/02/2015.
Last updated 12/05/2015.
AQA Education (AQA) is a registered charity (number 1073334) and a company limited by guarantee registered in
England and Wales (number 3644723). Our registered address is AQA, Devas Street, Manchester M15 6EX.
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Exemplar student response and
examiner commentary
A-level English Literature A (7712)
WW1 and its aftermath – resource package A
For teaching from September 2015
Introduction
Below you will find an exemplar student response to a Section B question in the specimen
assessment materials, followed by an examiner commentary on the response.
Paper 2A, Section B, unseen text, Fly Away Peter
Read the insert carefully. It is taken from the novel Fly Away Peter by David Malouf, published in
1982. In this scene Jim, the protagonist, visits his comrade Eric who has been badly wounded in a
recent battle. In the battle their mutual friend, Clancy, was killed. Eric wants to know who will care
for him after the war now that he is severely disabled.
[Specimen insert, beginning ‘What scared him now . .’]
Explore the significance of suffering in this extract. Remember to include in your answer relevant
detailed analysis of the ways that Malouf shapes meanings.
Band 5 response
If they were lucky enough to still be alive, combatants who had been injured on the battlefield
would eventually find themselves in hospital and later a convalescent home back in ‘Blighty’. Eric is
one such casualty of war, suggested by the fact that he ‘can’t even stand up to piss’. He has
probably lost the use of his legs. He is anxious and depressed, like the dashing young soldier in
Owen’s poem Disabled, who knows that he will ‘spend a few sick years in institutes’ and be
shamefully dependent on others to put him to bed. Despite a very economical style, with few
descriptive adjectives and minimal dialogue, we are able to understand the anguish and muted
desperation of men like Eric, ‘muted’ because little given away about the precise nature of his
suffering but it is undeniably there, in his nervousness about Jim not coming to visit him again, and
about his very uncertain future:
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England and Wales (number 3644723). Our registered address is AQA, Devas Street, Manchester M15 6EX.
‘Wilya come again, Jim?’
‘Now he wanted to know what lay beyond.
“Who?” he insisted.’
He expects someone to take care of him, just as an unbroken line of authority figures had done up
to now: the matron in the orphanage (where he passed his childhood and early adolescent years),
the NCOs in his regiment, the matron and her staff in the hospital where he is at present. These
professionals stand ‘in immediate relation to him’ although ironically they are not relations, i.e.
family. His dependency and neediness are palpable.
Paradoxically, Malouf is able to help us understand Eric’s suffering by presenting most of the
narrative from the point of view of his friend Jim. We are not only shown Jim’s actions (‘made a
gesture’, ‘stood preparing to leave’, ‘walked away’) and observations (‘The tip of his [Eric’s] tongue
appeared’, ‘it was at first the voice of a child’), we are also made painfully aware of his thoughts
and feelings (‘his own hot panic had invaded the room’, ‘he wished Clancy was here’, ‘startled . . by
the harshness of his own words’). Although Eric’s present predicament and suffering are what
superficially claim the reader’s attention, it is Jim who is the ‘protagonist’, literally the ‘first actor’,
and it is his emotions that are in the end the main topic. As the conversation between the two excomrades proceeds, we sense Jim’s growing unease, his difficulty in coping with Eric’s need for
reassurance that his friends will not desert him. But all Jim can offer is a ‘vague’ word of
encouragement that the hospital staff will look after him (‘They’re bound to’, ‘Of course they will’)
which is a poor substitute for a personal promise of friendship, loyalty and support, something he
privately acknowledges (‘he knew guiltily that he would not’). Jim’s particular form of ‘suffering’
here reaches a climax once he is outside in the hospital grounds. Here he begins to cry, his
emotional turmoil finding a physical response (‘pushing his fists hard into his eyes and trying to
control his breath’) which is beautifully translated into metaphor by Malouf in the words ‘it was as if
he had been taken over by some impersonal force that was weeping through him’, much as he
earlier explained Jim’s alarm in the words ‘his own hot panic had invaded the room’.
This is not to say that Malouf has not fleshed out Eric’s character sufficiently for us to ‘hear’ him
talk and ‘watch’ his behaviour. There are many examples of Eric’s words and actions, together with
narrative features, that help to dramatise the whole incident of this poignant reunion of two mates.
We know that he is ‘scared’, just as in Regeneration there are patients at Craiglockhart who admit
they are victims of their own fear, even if it means being branded ‘sissies’ and ‘weaklings’, as well
as men like Willard who are crippled and have to be assisted by an orderly. Eric’s need to be
reassured is obvious from the fact that he repeatedly asks Jim, ‘Wilya?’ in a voice which Jim
recognises as full of hurt and resentment (‘aggrieved’) and unwilling to be fobbed off (‘insistent’,
‘demanding his due’).
Other ways in which Malouf ‘shapes meanings’ include the use of slang (‘take a piss’) and
colloquial expressions (‘knocked about in the world’, ‘knew the ropes’) which together with the
ellipses (‘Y’reckon’, ‘alright’, ‘Wilya’) help to identify Eric and Jim as two men from ordinary
working-class backgrounds. There are one or two striking descriptions. ‘A fine line of sweat drops
on the boy’s upper lip gave him a phantom moustache’ underlines how frightened Eric is (‘sweat
drops’) and how young (‘boy’) he is, not long out of the orphanage perhaps, although the moisture
on his lip weirdly makes him look older. A little later Eric sounds like a ‘querulous old man’, which
reinforces the point that his experiences in battle have aged him dreadfully. The contrast with their
dead friend and comrade Clancy is very marked. Clancy was strong, assertive and worldly-wise,
able to stand up for himself, whereas Eric, like Jim, is pitifully inexperienced and lacking in courage
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England and Wales (number 3644723). Our registered address is AQA, Devas Street, Manchester M15 6EX.
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or ‘savvy’ which is why he feels so adrift, suffering with serious injuries in a hospital where no-one
knows or loves him, facing months or years even of just sitting in a chair (which he has had to be
helped into) gradually becoming overwhelmed by feelings of desolation.
‘Suffering’ is undeniably the theme of this passage. Even though it does not contain any graphic
description of the horrendous deaths and injuries endured on the battlefield by soldiers, such as
those in the poetry of Wilfred Owen who actually fought in the War and wrote from his own
observation, it is still powerful writing and able to give the reader an insight into the terrible
aftermath of war, as it applies to ordinary soldiers like Eric and Jim. Fly Away Peter is very unlikely
to be based on Malouf’s own experiences; however, it is a viable attempt to recreate the
atmosphere of the Great War from a modern standpoint. This and the economical way in which it is
written somehow make it all the more disturbing.
Examiner commentary
AO1
At all times the writing is assured and sophisticated, matching the student’s ability to think and
interpret at a sophisticated level. Although there is no debate as such here, (s)he shows us how
Malouf’s text can be read and fully evaluated for ‘significance’. Ideas are well organised, concepts
and terminology are introduced appropriately, and the technical accuracy is as good as flawless,
with judiciously chosen vocabulary and deftly managed punctuation of complex sentences.
AO2
Several aspects of narrative are perceptively discussed, with apposite illustration, as are aspects of
dialogue and language features generally. There is no shortage of detail in the presentation of
ideas about the way Malouf ‘shapes meanings’. There is a close reading of the text, using wellchosen quotations and skilful paraphrase to confirm a mature understanding of the ‘meaning’. This
applies to other aspects of the extract, e.g. Clancy, the hospital, Eric’s history. The student’s
engagement with detail, their awareness of structure and of point of view all enable the student to
see connections within the text.
AO3
The student has a clear understanding of the nature of comradeship or brotherhood between
soldiers, and very capably shows how the experience of fighting in a war impacts on its participants
even after the event. The exploration of the nature and consequence of suffering is intelligent and
imaginative.
AO4
Through the perceptive exploration of suffering in this extract the student is connecting with the
representation of a central issue of literature of WW1 and its Aftermath. Whilst not required, the
brief incidental references to other WW1 literature are valid and make connections with the wider
topic of WW1 and its aftermath and with the representation of suffering as it affects individuals
caught up in the hostilities, directly or otherwise.
AO5
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The men’s respective suffering, both physical and emotional, is described and analysed closely
ensuring that a cogent and informed interpretation of the text is explored.
Overall: This response appears to fit comfortably within band 5.
This resource is part of the WW1 and its aftermath resource package A.
Version 0.2
First published 06/02/2015.
Last updated 12/05/2015.
AQA Education (AQA) is a registered charity (number 1073334) and a company limited by guarantee registered in
England and Wales (number 3644723). Our registered address is AQA, Devas Street, Manchester M15 6EX.
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Specimen question commentary
A-level English Literature A (7712)
WW1 and its aftermath – resource package A
For teaching from September 2015
Introduction
This resource explains how a question taken from the specimen assessment material addresses
the assessment objectives, with some suggestions of how the task might be approached. This is
not intended to be an exhaustive list of every point that could be made but it gives teachers and
students some guidance that will support their work on this paper.
Paper 2A, Section B, comparative texts, Fly Away Peter
Sample question
Question 5: unseen extract
Read the insert carefully. It is taken from the novel Fly Away Peter by David Malouf, published in
1982. In this scene Jim, the protagonist, visits his comrade Eric who has been badly wounded in a
recent battle. In the battle their mutual friend, Clancy, was killed. Eric wants to know who will care
for him after the war now that he is severely disabled.
[Specimen insert, beginning ‘What scared him now . .’]
Explore the significance of suffering in this extract. Remember to include in your answer relevant
detailed analysis of the ways that Malouf shapes meanings.
How the question meets the Assessment Objectives
In this question, as throughout the paper, the assessment objectives are all assessed. As a result,
all the key words in the question should be addressed, indicating either focus (significance of
suffering, ways that Malouf shapes meanings) or direction (explore, relevant detailed analysis).
AO1 is tested through the way students organise their writing and express their ideas as they are
analysing the extract and exploring the significance of suffering. Value is placed on technical
accuracy, appropriate terminology and quality of discussion.
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England and Wales (number 3644723). Our registered address is AQA, Devas Street, Manchester M15 6EX.
AO2 is set up in the requirement to provide detailed analysis of the ways that Malouf shapes
meanings. Students are expected to illustrate their answers with as much textual detail as possible
– with quotations and other close reference – to support the points in their analysis.
‘Significance’ in AO3 is addressed when candidates demonstrate an understanding of the various
contexts of suffering, including the moral and the psychological. In exploring the nature of suffering
as presented in this passage, students will engage not only with the specific context of WW1 and
its aftermath, but also with the contexts of when texts were written and of reader response to the
representation of suffering.
To address AO4 students will connect with the representation of one of the central issues of the
literature of WW1 and its aftermath, i.e. physical, mental and emotional suffering as it affects
combatants and those who minister to them, other service personnel, family and friends. Their
answers should be implicitly informed by a wider awareness of the concept and the many forms its
representation can take, as seen in other reading around this period.
AO5 tests students’ skill in engaging with different ways in which significance can be found in this
extract and showing an understanding that meanings are not fixed.
Possible content
Students might choose to write about any of the following and thereby address AO2: aspects of
narrative form and/or genre, such as point-of-view which shifts between Eric and Jim; the overall
shape and direction of their conversation; the hospital setting and its impact on Eric and Jim
respectively; the use of direct speech in a conversation between the two men, containing elliptical
forms (‘Y’reckon’, ‘Wilya?’) and vulgar slang (‘take a piss’); colloquialisms (‘knocked about’, ‘knew
the ropes’); elements of back-story (the orphanage, the NCOs, Clancy); unspoken thoughts (‘The
problem in Eric’s mind . . helped into a chair’; ‘It was Eric’s questions he would be unable to face.’);
Jim’s non-committal words and actions (‘vague’) in response to Eric’s need for reassurance,
including repetitions (‘they’ll look after you alright’, ‘Wilya Jim?’) and what they indicate; figurative
language (‘his own hot panic had invaded the room’, ‘phantom moustache’, ‘force weeping through
him’); sparing use of descriptive adjectives (‘dry’, ‘hot’, ‘fine’, ‘thin and far away’, ‘aggrieved’,
‘insistent’, ‘querulous’, ‘impersonal’) which is characteristic of a generally economical style
throughout. Students should make it clear they are conscious that the text under analysis is
fictional, the work of a creative imagination.
To address AO3 students will need to explore ideas about: comradeship, friendship and loyalty
among male combatants (Jim visiting the disabled Eric in hospital; the ‘attraction’ of their mutual
army friend Clancy); the suffering of those seriously injured in the war and their difficulty in coming
to terms with a bleak and uncertain future; the incongruous evidence of premature ageing in young
men who have been through hell in the trenches; the support provided by the army, hospital staff
(‘the charity of their people’) and visitors like Jim.
AO4 will be addressed if and when candidates explore the nature of suffering, so connecting with
the representation of one of the central issues of WW1 and its aftermath. They may cite examples
of changing ideas about the nature of conflict and of the suffering experienced by those involved,
whether directly or indirectly. They should also be ready to make comparisons between the
attitudes of those who were alive at the time of The Great War and those in more recent times.
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Exploring different interpretations, the criteria of AO5 are met if students are able to show that they
have fully ‘explored the significance of suffering’ in the extract. They should be ready to write
about: Eric’s physical condition (‘I can’t even stand up to take a piss’, ‘All those mornings when he
would have to be helped into a chair’) and his emotional state, above all his neediness and fearful
anxiety about the future (betrayed by his ‘dry lips’ and ‘sweat drops’, and by the change in his voice
which Jim perceives as he walks away); Jim’s response to Eric’s predicament and questioning,
which is presented at first as vagueness, then ‘hot panic’, later in making promises which ‘he knew
guiltily’ he would not keep, and finally bursting into tears, ‘trying to control his breath’, being
‘startled’ by the ‘harshness of his own words’. They could also give some account of the characters
Malouf has placed in the background of the narrative, all of whom in their different ways were or
are there to look after him: the matron at the orphanage where presumably Eric grew up; the NCOs
he will have fought alongside; the ward sisters; Clancy whose worldliness and readiness to assert
‘his rights’ would have given Eric (and Jim) much-needed moral strength and courage.
This resource is part of the WW1 and its aftermath resource package A.
Version 0.2
First published 06/02/2015.
Last updated 12/05/2015.
AQA Education (AQA) is a registered charity (number 1073334) and a company limited by guarantee registered in
England and Wales (number 3644723). Our registered address is AQA, Devas Street, Manchester M15 6EX.
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Exemplar student response and
examiner commentary
A-level English Literature A (7712)
WW1 and its aftermath – resource package A
For teaching from September 2015
Introduction
Below you will find an exemplar student response to a Section B question in the specimen
assessment materials, followed by an examiner commentary on the response.
Paper 2A, Section B, comparative texts, My Boy Jack, All Quiet on
the Western Front
‘Suffering in war comes in many different forms.’
Compare the significance of suffering in two other texts you have studied. Remember to include in
your answer reference to how meanings are shaped in the texts you are comparing.
Band 2 response
There are two types of suffering in war. There is the suffering of soldiers fighting in the trenches
and the suffering of loved ones stuck at home wondering what is happening to them. In this essay I
will show how Remarque in All Quiet on the Western Front and Haig in My Boy Jack have written
about these types of suffering.
Remarque was a German and his time in the army gave him a lot of material which he could use in
his novel. He writes about several different kinds of suffering but the obvious one is about what the
men had to go through on the battlefield. One section is full of descriptions of trench warfare. He
doesn’t often say how he and his comrades suffered, you have to work it out: ‘Some of the
wounded have to lie there for a long time, and we listen to them dying.’ The story-teller does not
say how all this destruction and injury affected him, but you can guess what it felt like having to
hear such terrible suffering.
On and off through the book you are told what trench warfare was really like, for example the
pouring rain, standing up to your waist in water, the noise of bombardments, shells whizzing
overhead, hunger and exhaustion, being stressed out because you do not know when you are
going to die, and seeing your comrades shot to pieces round you. It all takes its toll and in the end
a soldier feels he has become a sort of animal.
The novel is not all doom and gloom. There is the section where Paul goes home and spends time
with his mother, and there is the occasion when he and his friends visit a brothel, swimming across
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a canal to get there. ‘It is good to be able to sit somewhere quietly under the chestnut trees next to
the skittle alley.’ He also says he likes being alone best which he can’t on the battlefield.
In My Boy Jack most of the scenes are at the Kipling family home where we see Jack’s father
Rudyard trying to cope with his son being reported missing in a telegram. At first he won’t open the
telegram, which is his way of coping, but in the end he does. After he does they cling on to the
hope that he hasn’t been killed, but in the end they find out from Bowe who was in Jack’s platoon
that he did in fact die. First Bowe describes Jack’s injury: ‘There’s nothin’ below his top lip, nothin’
at all. He’s cryin’ with the pain, sir.’ Then he admits that he did nothing to help because Jack
wouldn’t have wanted him to see him like that. So Rudyard has to accept that his son is dead. He
tells himself that ‘Jack led his men from the front, and was courageous in the face of considerable
enemy fire.’ He hasn’t had the letter yet from Jack’s CO, but he uses the sort of language that sort
of letter would contain. The reactions of the family show differences. Rudyard says Jack is ‘free
while we are trapped down here’, which is a religious idea, while Carrie says she feels more dead
than alive. She hates her husband because he is coming out with things like that and ‘It is a
common agony.’ She says, ‘I don’t care how many people it’s happened to.’ They are both
suffering but deal with the pain completely differently. But by the end of the play Rudyard has
written a poem called My Boy Jack which contains a line which suggests he hasn’t got over it after
all.
Suffering is also portrayed in the battlefield scenes, where Bowe can’t stop shaking and can’t fix
his bayonet [because] his fingers won’t work properly. Even Jack admits to being frightened, and
when they go over the top McHugh and Doyle let out a ‘long, piercing primal scream to defy their
fear.’
It can be seen that suffering takes many different forms in these two books.
Examiner commentary
AO1
There is a simple sense of contrast in each half of the answer – tumult of the battlefield vs
tranquillity behind the lines (in Remarque), Rudyard and Carrie’s irreconcilable views (in Haig) –
but overall the organisation of ideas is haphazard. Appropriate concepts and terminology are
scarce; expressions like ‘on and off’, ‘stressed out’, ‘not all doom and gloom’ and ‘he hasn’t got
over it’ tend to trivialise the observation. Although spelling and (most) punctuation are correct, the
syntax is flawed and the style frequently clumsy.
AO2
For the most part the answer is made up of generalised descriptions of events but some attention
is paid to characters’ feelings which are documented from the text by means of a limited number of
quotations or close reference. The examiner continually has to tease out ‘significance’ and
‘meanings’.
AO3
Examples are given of forms of suffering on the part of combatants and their families, but there is
little analysis of the true nature of that suffering or of its consequences beyond the immediate.
There is simple awareness of contexts, but it is rudimentary. It would have been helpful if
potentially relevant material had been developed, e.g. ‘a sort of animal’ and ‘a religious idea’.
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AO4
Connections of similarity and difference are made in a straightforward manner.
AO5
As required, the candidate has written about examples of two genres, but no overt or meaningful
comparisons are made between them, and in this respect the question has not been properly
answered.
Overall: This response seems to fit the descriptors in band 2.
This resource is part of the WW1 and its aftermath resource package A.
Version 0.2
First published 06/02/2015.
Last updated 12/05/2015.
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England and Wales (number 3644723). Our registered address is AQA, Devas Street, Manchester M15 6EX.
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Exemplar student response and
examiner commentary
A-level English Literature A (7712)
WW1 and its aftermath – resource package A
For teaching from September 2015
Introduction
Below you will find an exemplar student response to a Section B question in the specimen
assessment materials, followed by an examiner commentary on the response.
Paper 2A, Section B, comparative texts, My Boy Jack, All Quiet on
the Western Front
‘Suffering in war comes in many different forms.’
Compare the significance of suffering in two other texts you have studied. Remember to include in
your answer reference to how meanings are shaped in the texts you are comparing.
Band 5 response
In his famous Soldier’s Declaration of 1917, Siegfried Sassoon said that he had seen ‘the suffering
of the troops’ and no longer wished to be ‘a party to prolong that suffering’. He was, of course,
writing about the horror of fighting on the Western Front, as so many others did, including Wilfred
Owen. Others have written about them long afterwards, relying on contemporary accounts, like
Sebastian Faulks and the tunnellers in Birdsong. Day after day, night after night, men were
subjected to a constant barrage of gunfire and gas attacks which had them living on a knife’s edge
of anxiety and pure terror. Even when there were spells of relative quiet they had to withstand cold,
never-ending rain, rats, bad food and water leading to dysentery, trench foot, and a multitude of
other dehumanising sources of torment. If they were not crippled by physical wounds they were
likely to become ‘crippled’ in their minds, from shell-shock. Both would leave them with a legacy of
suffering that would last until their deaths years later; for some of them the Aftermath was infinitely
worse than the quick death on the battlefield that Rudyard prays for, for his son in My Boy Jack.
Sassoon was a British soldier who obviously wrote from the Tommy’s point-of-view and put his
experience of the war into his poetry. Erich Maria Remarque was a German soldier but his fictional
account of the war, presented by his young ‘hero’ Paul Bäumer, could so easily have been written
by someone with Sassoon’s experience from the British side. There are some long passages in All
Quiet on the Western Front which are almost unbearable to read, especially when describing the
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obscene conditions in which Paul and his comrades have to live and fight, which never seem to let
up. An example would be the closing sections of Chapter 6 where Paul conveys the nightmare of
constant bombardment, presented as a list to make it seem all the more intense and unremitting:
‘Continuous fire, defensive fire, curtain fire, trench mortars, gas, tanks, machine-guns,
handgrenades — words, words, but they embrace all the horrors of the world.’
The writing is so dense with graphic description of those ‘horrors’ it is hard to know which quotation
will best illustrate them, but I was particularly moved by the similes and metaphors used to
describe young recruits being ‘mown down because they are listening in terror to the howl of the
great coal-box shells’. They huddle together ‘like sheep’, ‘even the wounded are picked off like
rabbits.’ ‘The pale turnip faces, the pitifully clenched hands.’ The account goes on: ‘they just
whimper softly for their mothers as they lie there with their chests and guts and arms and legs torn
to pieces.’ Raw unimaginable suffering, the result of mankind’s barbarity towards his fellow man.
And the suffering is not confined to the Front. When he is recovering in the military hospital he
writes, ‘’How pointless all human thoughts, words and deeds must be, if things like this are
possible! . . if thousands of years of civilisation weren’t even able to prevent this river of blood.’
Sassoon would have agreed.
Paul and his comrades Tjaden, Müller, Kat and the others suffer in other ways, right from when
they undergo initial training and are subjected to bullying and physical hardship by Corporal
Himmelstoss. Even when he goes home to visit his mother, Paul is not free from a kind of
suffering: ‘Suddenly a feeling of isolation wells up inside me. I can’t get back, I’m locked out. . I sit
there as wretched as a condemned man.’ But these kinds of misery and anguish are nothing
beside what has to be endured in the living hell of the battlefield.
The battlefield is present in David Haig’s play My Boy Jack, in scenes 6, 7 and 8 of Act One, and
indirectly in Act Two scene 3 as Bowe relives John Kipling’s last hours. The same causes of
suffering that we saw in the All Quiet are represented here: the filthy conditions in the trenches, the
incessant rain, the sound of the shells, a ‘huge explosion’, Bowe’s shaking and shivering, Doyle
unable to urinate, McHugh’s lurid description of a serious stomach wound. Jack behaves in an
exemplary way towards the men in his care, appearing calm and collected as he ministers to
Bowe’s wrecked feet, but in a quiet moment, before he and his men go ‘over the top’, he admits his
own private suffering: ‘I’m so frightened. . . Will I be brave? Will I fail? . . Please God let me live.’
His father would have been proud to know he said that.
But the majority of the action takes place in England, at the Kiplings’ house, which provides a
massive contrast to the places that Paul Bäumer writes about. Although from there the sound of
the artillery across the Channel can be faintly heard, Batemans seems to be a haven of tranquillity,
yet the family are in a state of permanent agitation which later develops into unqualified suffering
and grief. At the beginning Jack can’t wait to escape from his ‘suffocating’ life at home, but that is
nothing compared to what he has to endure once he is fighting on the Western Front. The tension
is heightened after Rudyard receives a telegram. Right from the first stage direction you can tell he
is undergoing some kind of torment: ‘He is very still. He stares at the telegram. Silence.’ When she
enters Carrie sees the telegram and thinking the worst, is ‘very alarmed’. It transpires that Jack is
missing, not necessarily dead, but it provokes a disbelieving response in his father: ‘No. No. No.
No. No. No.’ But matters only get worse because in the end, thanks to Bowe’s faltering account of
how he saw Jack with half his face shot away ‘cryin’ with the pain’ and then lost sight of him when
a shell exploded nearby, Rudyard has to accept that his boy has been killed in action. Immediately
he moves into ‘stiff upper lip’ mode and convinces himself that Jack died courageously. ‘He had his
heart’s desire. . . It was a short life, but in a sense complete.’ Carrie is horrified and bitterly
sarcastic: ‘I am sincerely relieved that you are at ease with it all.’ In their different ways they are
trying to manage their grief. She says, ‘I can’t bear to think . . the pain he must have been in’. But
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her husband is not as much at ease as she thinks, because he later says, ‘Do you want me to own
up . . that I murdered my son?’ because he supported the war effort and encouraged Jack to ‘join
up’.
Remarque in prose fiction and Haig in drama have represented ideas about the brutal reality of
The Great War. One of them lived through the war himself and speaks with an authentic voice; the
other was born forty years after the event and had to read historical documents to discover the
facts surrounding the true story of John Kipling. All Quiet must have many thousands of words in it
while My Boy Jack is short and sparing with words. Both in their different ways give us an insight
into the many different forms that suffering took during that war.
Examiner commentary
AO1
Considering this answer was written under exam conditions – albeit with the texts to hand – the
technical accuracy is impressive, as are the quality of argument, the organisation of ideas, and the
use of appropriate concepts and terminology. Fluent, stylish, assured, it makes for a compelling
read.
AO2
The student’s analysis and discussion throughout have been supported by close reference to the
text, mostly in the form of quotations, one or two of which are perhaps a little long. Perhaps
analysis could be more developed in places. Readers’ responses to the novel and the play are
influenced by the authors’ use of narrative, depiction of setting, incident, character, dialogue, pointof-view, etc. The student is aware of all these and other ways (e.g. stage directions, figurative
language) in which ‘meanings are shaped’ and talks about them with a perceptive personal ‘voice’.
Intelligence and sincerity of interest are well documented here.
AO3
The topic of suffering is thoroughly explored, in both texts. Different forms of suffering are
discussed and illustrated in well-chosen examples. The home front and the Western Front are
dealt with proportionately; physical and mental/emotional suffering are described and commented
on with mature discrimination.
AO4
Perhaps the reference to Sassoon at the outset is a distraction, but together with the later brief
references to Owen and Faulks, it does at least show the student is aware of contexts and of the
literature of WW1 whether contemporary or post facto. Distractions aside, the question asked for
comparison, and that is what we have been given here. Valid links of similarity and contrast are
made between the two main texts under discussion.
AO5
By means of a disciplined and appositely illustrated discussion the student has shown that (s)he
has engaged intelligently with the texts so as to explore coherent and informed interpretations. The
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student has taken due account of the respective genres of the two texts and the extent to which
each affects the ways in which they present suffering.
Overall: This response seems to fit into band 5.
This resource is part of the WW1 and its aftermath resource package A.
Version 0.2
First published 06/02/2015.
Last updated 12/05/2015.
AQA Education (AQA) is a registered charity (number 1073334) and a company limited by guarantee registered in
England and Wales (number 3644723). Our registered address is AQA, Devas Street, Manchester M15 6EX.
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Specimen question commentary
A-level English Literature A (7712)
WW1 and its aftermath – resource package A
For teaching from September 2015
Introduction
This resource explains how a question taken from the specimen assessment material addresses
the assessment objectives, with some suggestions of how the task might be approached. This is
not intended to be an exhaustive list of every point that could be made but it gives teachers and
students some guidance that will support their work on this paper.
Paper 2A, Section B, comparative texts, My Boy Jack, All Quiet on the
Western Front
Sample question
Question 6: Drama and prose contextual linking (option 1)
‘Suffering in war comes in many different forms.’
Compare the significance of suffering in two other texts you have studied. Remember to include in
your answer reference to how meanings are shaped in the texts you are comparing.
You must use one drama text and one prose text in your response, at least one of which must be
a text written post-2000.
[The exemplar scripts here use David Haig, My Boy Jack (post-2000) as the drama text and Erich
Maria Remarque, All Quiet on the Western Front as the prose text, in the prescribed translation by
Prof. Brian Murdoch, 1994. The specific guidance below gives examples only from those two
texts.]
How the question meets the Assessment Objectives
In this question, as throughout the paper, the assessment objectives are all assessed. As a result,
all the key words in the question should be addressed, indicating either focus (suffering in war,
many different forms, how meanings are shaped) or direction (compare, drama, prose, two texts of
which one must be post-2000).
AO1 is tested through the way the students organise their writing and express their ideas as they
analyse the significance of suffering. Value is placed on technical accuracy, appropriate
terminology and the quality of the discussion.
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England and Wales (number 3644723). Our registered address is AQA, Devas Street, Manchester M15 6EX.
AO2 is set up in the requirement to include reference to the ways that meanings are shaped.
Students should illustrate their answers with relevant textual detail wherever possible – with
quotations and other close reference – to support the points in their comparison and discussion.
Picking up from their study of the unseen, AO3 is addressed when candidates demonstrate an
understanding of the various contexts of suffering, including the moral and the psychological. In
exploring the nature of suffering as presented in their two texts, students will engage not only with
the specific context of WW1 and its aftermath, but also with the contexts of when texts were written
and of reader response to the representation of suffering.
To address AO4 students will make comparisons between their two chosen texts, as directed in
the question, and will connect to a wider awareness of the significance of suffering and the many
forms its representation can take in literature of WW1 and its aftermath. Different forms of suffering
should be considered, i.e. physical and mental suffering as it affects the combatants, their families
and friends, those who minister to them, other service personnel and the public at large.
AO5 tests students’ skill in engaging with different ways in which significance can be found in their
chosen texts and in showing an understanding that through comparison different meanings can be
opened up.
Possible content
Students will address AO2 if they focus on any of the following, according to which genre their
chosen texts belong to. This is an Open Book examination, therefore candidates are expected to
quote appropriately and accurately from those texts.
If a prose text has been chosen, then attention could be paid, for example, to narrative structure;
the delineation and presentation of character (most notably of Paul Bäumer, but also of other key
figures like Kemmerich, ‘Kat’ Katczinsky, Kropp, Himmelstoss, Müller and Tjaden); point-of-view
and narrator’s ‘voice’, his thoughts on the wider context of the war, its futility and inhumanity, the
suffering of all combatants (irrespective of nationality); the use of dialogue and of indirect speech;
the sequence or chronology of events; the description of settings (graphic scenes on the battlefield
contrasted with scenes set in the relative peacefulness of a nearby town or back home, or with
those set the hospital); ways of influencing the reader’s response to character and incident, which
may include ellipsis, use of the historic present tense, metaphor and other figurative language.
If a drama text is chosen, then candidates could, for example, write about aspects of overall
structure and the placing of scenes in time and place (twelve scenes spread across eleven years,
from before the war begins to a significant moment for the Kipling family in the Aftermath; scenes
set at Batemans contrasted with those set on the Western Front in France; the counterpoint of
scenes involving the Kiplings and those involving Jack’s men); the importance of stage directions;
direct and indirect ways of communicating ideas and ‘messages’ (the consequences for England of
a German invasion; the imperatives of patriotism, honour and service; the differing expectations of
members of the same family; religious belief in the context of the ultimate sacrifice); ways of
presenting character and the interaction between characters (the Kiplings at home, before and
after the news of Jack’s being declared missing, and then after the certainty of his death; Jack with
his men on the battlefield; the physical suffering of Bowe and the others contrasted with the
emotional suffering of Rudyard, Carrie and Elsie); the titles of the two works (Haig’s taken from
Kipling’s very personal poem about the loss of his only son in the war; the irony of Remarque’s).
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To address AO3 students will need to explore: the nature of suffering as it affects those on the
home front (Rudyard Kipling, Carrie and Elsie; Bäumer’s mother) as well as those drawn directly
into combat (Jack, Bowe, all those in Paul’s band of comrades, and other soldiers); the nature and
impact of physical suffering on the one hand, and of psychological and emotional suffering on the
other; how the presentation of suffering is connected to other themes and subjects in the literature
of WW1 and its aftermath (the Kipling family in 1924; examples passim in Remarque). Students
need to take account of the fact that, although first published ten years after the end of the War, All
Quiet is the work of someone who actually fought in the War and was able to draw on his own
experiences when writing his novel. By contrast, the play My Boy Jack is the work of one of our
living playwrights which therefore has a very different genesis and perspective on a story involving
characters who represent historically authentic figures.
AO4 will be addressed when candidates explore the ‘significance’ of suffering in their two texts,
thereby connecting with the representation of one of the central issues of the literature of WW1 and
the aftermath. They could cite examples of changing ideas about the nature of conflict and of the
suffering experienced by those involved, whether directly or indirectly. They should, however,
concentrate on the differences and similarities noted between their two chosen texts and attempt to
make valid comparisons at all significant stages of their answers, as directed in the question.
Incorporating different interpretations, the criteria of AO5 are met if students are able to show that
they have fully ‘explored the significance of suffering’ in their chosen texts. They should be ready to
initiate and manage a debate around the nature and possible forms of suffering as expressed in
those texts (the savage brutality, misery and degradation experienced by soldiers in the trenches;
the physical legacy of injuries sustained in the fighting or during gas attacks; the pain of loss and
separation and of not knowing experienced by those left at home) and to evaluate the extent to
which the contrasting genres – here prose and drama – affect the ways in which suffering in
particular is presented and meanings generally are understood by the reader.
This resource is part of the WW1 and its aftermath resource package A.
Version 0.2
First published 06/02/2015.
Last updated 12/05/2015.
AQA Education (AQA) is a registered charity (number 1073334) and a company limited by guarantee registered in
England and Wales (number 3644723). Our registered address is AQA, Devas Street, Manchester M15 6EX.
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