Dynamix Duo-Part One: The Art of Questioning
By Dr. Jenny Hooie and Dr. Tom Fry
Questioning is one of the most powerful tools in a facilitator’s toolbox. When used effectively, it
can immediately shift a conversation from a debate in which group members are on opposing
sides to a dialogue of deeper understanding.
Appropriate questions enable a group to shift the focus from arguing what is ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ to
engaging in a more collaborative effort that will increase the shared understanding of the entire
group.
When using questioning with a group, it is imperative to consider two things thoughtfully: the
tone of the question and the type of question.
Tone
The tone of a question can determine if the question will be a positive or negative influence on
the group work. A question posed in frustration, as noted by body language and voice, can
completely derail the group conversation. While a question posed in a calm, inquisitive manner
can have the complete opposite effect.
Let’s look at a few examples of questions in both negative and positive tones. This will help you
better understand the difference between the two.
Negative Tone
Positive Tone
Why are we even talking about this?
Where are we on the agenda? I think I
might be off topic.
What do you know about this topic?
Who has had direct experiences with this
topic?
Why don’t we vote and get this over with?
What process are we using for decisionmaking?
Why did you even bring that up?
How can we learn from that to help us
better understand the topic?
People respond specifically to tone and wording. If presented with a question that comes across
as accusatory, people will likely take a defensive stance. Once the walls of defense have gone
up, it is difficult for any communication to take place.
Consider this story:
Richard was working as a lead for a group project designed to improve acquisitions. At the time
it seemed that conversations were going well, but the meeting was lasting longer than Richard
had planned. He was getting frustrated and instead of continuing the conversation, he turned to
one coworker who was explaining her theory on streamlining acquisitions and he said, “Why did
you bring that up? We already decided what we would do.”
Immediately, there was a shift in the tone of the room. Not only was the coworker embarrassed
but other coworkers felt too uncomfortable to say anything else. While the meeting was
concluded, the actual paths of streamlining acquisitions was not fleshed out and very little
changed within the company.
Simply changing the tone of a question can be the difference between keeping communications
flowing and having everything fall apart. If Richard had asked the coworker to explain more
about her theory, the new method for acquisitions of the business could have improved.
Type
Paired with the tone of a question is the actual wording and content of the question. In order to
support collaborative dialogue, it is ideal to avoid dichotomous (yes or no) questions that only
require a single word response; and instead search for richer, more probing questions.
Asking dichotomous questions is likely to lead to a dead end in the conversation. When people
are presented with a question that they can answer with one word, they will not feel inclined to
elaborate on their reasons for the answer.
So, let’s look at some examples of dichotomous questions compared to those that probe deeper
and inspire continued communication.
Dichotomous Questions
Probing Questions
What would be one reason you would
support this decision?
Are you in favor of this?
What would be one reason why you would
oppose this decision?
Tell me what this concept means to you?
Do you understand this concept?
What do you mean by the word ____?
Are we done with this decision?
Who or what else do we need to consider
as we make this decision?
Do you have anything to add?
What is your perspective on this topic?
Let’s examine an example of this idea in action:
Sandra was asked to lead a conference on how to use the new computer system
implanted in her office because she was the head of the IT department and she was the
most experienced with that system.
After she completed her presentation, she moved on to the question and answer portion
of the conference. At first no one asked any questions, so Sandra understood that she
needed to prompt more conversation and began to ask questions herself.
The problem is that she didn’t know what kinds of questions to ask in order to prompt
communication. She asked:
•
“Do you understand how this system works?
There was an uncomfortable silence. It only lasted a few seconds, but it worried
Sandra so she quickly added
•
“Are you ready to start the system?”
Seconds later, even more nervous, she asked
•
Does anyone have any questions?
The participants were thoroughly confused, not knowing which of the three
questions to answer.
Both the dichotomous nature of the questions and rapid rate with which they were fired
left the participants confused on what to answer. The result was numerous mistakes
that were costly to the business.
As a general rule, you cannot expect a conversation to carry itself. Dialogue will die out once
people are asked something they can answer with a simple yes or a no.
In order to keep the lines of communication open, you need to focus on probing to elicit
opinions, thoughts and beliefs. If you do not keep the conversation open, people may not
thoroughly understand or they may not have felt they had the opportunity to ask and clarify.
Dynamix Duo- Part Two: Paraphrasing
Paraphrasing often gets a bad rap. This is probably because we have all been subjected to the
‘parroting’ type of paraphrasing in which someone says, “I hear you saying…” and then recites
exactly what you said. This feels false and can even be annoying.
Unfortunately, this is the most common type of paraphrasing used since people don’t fully
understand how to use it correctly to deepen the conversation. In contrast, a quality paraphrase
is a restatement of the speaker using different words. When possible, you will want the
paraphrase to be a concise summary of the speaker.
A quality paraphrase represents a synthesis of the content of the speaker in as simplistic a form
as possible. For our purposes, paraphrasing is a tool used to develop a deeper understanding.
When someone restates your point and misses an essential element, or gets it incorrect, most
likely you will correct the person, often providing more information. As this process goes back
and forth, the understanding of the group deepens. This is the power of the paraphrase.
Unfortunately, it is an underutilized skill.
How to paraphrase without being a parrot
The most important tools for developing your paraphrasing skills are listening and practice. First,
if the goal of your dialogue is to develop a deeper understanding of the topic, your listening
transforms.
You move from planning what you are going to say next to fully attending to the person who is
speaking. If you know you are going to paraphrase, your listening automatically deepens. Once
you have adjusted your listening, the only way to become more natural at paraphrasing is to
practice.
This means taking risks because it will not be comfortable at first and you may stumble over
your words. The good part of this is that the speaker will probably not notice.
People are so rarely listened to, that they appreciate even an attempt at paraphrasing because
it gives them a chance to hear their thoughts reflected and then continue the dialogue.
Let’s look at some examples of paraphrasing:
•
Original statement – “I don’t think this new method of managing accounts
payable will be very useful. It’s going to leave too many loopholes and we have
already seen how it has
let some bills slip through the cracks. We lost money last month on late payments to
three vendors and our system completely lost one vendors account. We didn’t know how
to contact them, where to order from, or what we owed. They charged us a $75 late fee.
Another company’s bills were just lost in the system. Our accounts payable clerk didn’t
even know a bill existed. These kinds of problems will keep adding up. Don’t you think it
would be a good idea to do something different?”
•
Parrot Paraphrase – “So, I see what you are saying. This new method of
accounts payable leaves too many loopholes and it has already happened
because we let some bills slip through the cracks. We lost money in a month
because we had late payments to vendors.”
•
Proper Paraphrase – “Ok, you have a valid point. If I understand you correctly,
you feel that we should explore other options because you have seen some
issues with the new system. You think that the errors it could cause are too costly
for us not to look into something else, right?”
As you can see, paraphrasing the proper way is for clarification purposes, not to just repeat
what someone else said.
Paraphrase Starters
It is essential that you listen and then give yourself a moment to develop your paraphrase. The
pause gives you an opportunity to organize your thinking and prepare your paraphrase.
Give yourself the gift of time to properly construct your paraphrase. The speaker will not mind
the pause, as they will be able to tell that you are processing what they have just said. Taking
your time will prevent you from simply repeating the speaker in a one-on-one dialogue or a
meeting and improve the quality of your paraphrase.
Taking this pause indicates that you are listening and naturally slows the dialogue. That is a
good thing because the other person will feel appreciated for what they have said.
The pause can even become contagious and encourage others to take time to think before
speaking. Here are some paraphrase starters that you could use in your own dialogues:
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You think that…
You feel that…
You are concerned about…
It sounds like…
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You would like…
A goal we have is…
Our group focus is…
It seems our main issue is…
If I understand you correctly…
Paraphrasing is a critical aspect of communicating, but is rarely taught. It will take some time
and authentic practice to increase your comfort using paraphrasing. However, those who use
paraphrasing effectively will find their communications much improved.
References:
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Garmston, R. J. (2008). Raise the level of conversation by using paraphrasing as
a listening tool. National Staff Development Council. Retrieved from:
http://www.michiganedusource.org/Conferences/mw10/MASAMWParaphrasingG
armston.doc
Leonard, I. (n.d.). The art of effective questioning: Asking the right question for
the desired result. Retrieved from:
http://www.coachingforchange.com/pub10.html
Purdue University. (n.d.). Paraphrase: Write it in your own words. Retrieved from:
https://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/owlprint/619/
Treadwell, D. (2013). Introducing Communication Research: Paths of Inquiry.
Sage Publications, CA: Los Angeles.
Watson, Stephanie. (2014). 10 Tips for effective workplace communication.
Retrieved from: http://money.howstuffworks.com/business/starting-a-job/10-tipsfor-effective-workplace-communication.htm
Dr. Jenny Hooie: [email protected] Dr. Tom Fry: [email protected]