Edina
Parent
Toolkit
Chemical Health
for Adolescents
• Awareness
• Prevention
• Action
www.edinatoolkit.com
Table of Contents
Prevention Begins with YOU …………………………… 3
Risks of Developing a Drug or Alcohol Problem …… 4
What can reduce the risk
What can increase the risk
Why Adolescent Substance Use is So Dangerous….. 5
Effects on Brain Development
Alcohol/Drug-Related Teen Deaths
Sexual Outcomes
Increased Risk for Alcoholism and Drug Addiction
Is Your Child Using Alcohol or Drugs? ……………….. 7
What are the Physical Signs?
What are the Behavioral Signs?
Other Indicators
The Importance of Recognizing Depression/Anxiety
Red Flags that Indicate Need for Immediate Professional Help
Prevention and Safety …………………………………… 13
General Parenting Tips for Teens
Eight Great Ways to Keep Youth Safe
Staying Connected – Eat Dinner Together!
Connecting with Other Parents
Keeping Your Teenagers Safe When They Go Out
Dealing with Parties (Attending and Hosting)
Abstinence Contracts
If You Suspect Your Child is Using Alcohol or Drugs… 31
What are Your Options?
Confronting Your Child When They Have a Problem
School Policies and the Law ………………………….……. 36
Resources ……………………………………………..……….. 37
Community and Parenting Resources
Substance-Related Websites and National Resources
Edina High School Resources
Information and Referral Services
Crisis Numbers
Appendix A: Example of House Rules Document …….. 41
2
Prevention Begins
with YOU
Children report that PARENTS are a major reason they choose not to
alcohol/drugs.
When asked “Why do you choose not to use?,” teens give the following
types of responses:
“What stands between me and drugs is my parents and common sense.”
“I know that I’m making my parents proud.”
“My friends and family, they encourage me in sports, school, and
everything else. They teach me right from wrong, and doing drugs is
wrong!”
“My adoptive mother. Delivering me from an abusive past, helping the
wounds to mend, helping me to trust again, and for being there when I
needed her. I can never let her down! Thanks Mom!”
Source: www.freevibe.com
3
Risks of Developing a
Drug or Alcohol
Problem
What can REDUCE the Risk of an Adolescent Developing a Drug or
Alcohol Problem?
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Feeling connected with and valued by family and other significant adults
Parental supervision and involvement with child’s activities
High educational aspirations of parent and child
Academic success
Feeling connected with school and valuing academic achievement
Strong bonds with social institutions (school, church, community)
Personal disapproval of drug and alcohol use
Personal belief that drug and alcohol use is dangerous and harmful
Having parents who verbalize expectations about and consequences for using
alcohol and other drugs
What can INCREASE the Risk of an Adolescent Developing a Drug or
Alcohol Problem?
• Early age of first use
• Feeling unloved by family, low mutual attachment by parents, ineffective
parenting
• Chaotic home environment
• Poor social coping skills
• Perceived external approval of drug use (peers, family, community)
• Affiliation with deviant peers
• Working at a job or having above-average disposable income
• Past or current drug or alcohol problems within the family
• Past or current family emotional or physical abuse or neglect (especially
depression)
• Past or current sexual abuse
• Diagnosis of Attention Deficit /Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD,ADD)
KNOW YOUR FAMILY HISTORY of mental health issues. Depression,
anxiety, addictive and compulsive behavior can have genetic components.
4
Why Adolescent
Substance Use is
So Dangerous
While we may not have realized it 20 years ago, adolescent substance use is
associated with serious health consequences. According to recent research, teens
who choose to use illegal substances may face:
Effects on Brain Development
• The brain goes through dynamic change during adolescence, and
alcohol can seriously damage long- and short-term growth processes.
Frontal lobe development and the refinement of pathways and
connections continue through the late teens or early twenties.
Damage from alcohol at this time can be long-term and irreversible. In
addition, short-term or moderate drinking impairs learning and
memory far more in youth than adults.
(from the American Medical Association website)
• The feelings and impaired behavior that signal intoxication in the adult
brain are delayed in the adolescent brain. This can lead to over
consumption and even alcohol poisoning which is potentially fatal.
• An adolescent brain that is exposed to alcohol and other chemicals is
more susceptible to depression and other mental illnesses.
Alcohol/Drug-Related Teen Deaths
• Alcohol/drug use is associated with the leading causes of death among
young people, including car crashes, suicide, homicide, alcohol
poisoning and drug overdoses.
• A 16-year-old is more likely to die from an alcohol-related incident than
from any other cause.
5
Why Adolescent Substance Use is So Harmful
Increased Risk for Sexual Violence, Sexually-Transmitted Diseases
and Unintended Pregnancy
• Alcohol/drug use (by perpetrator, victim or both) is heavily implicated
in cases of date rape and sexual assault among teens and college
students.
• Adolescents (ages 15 and older) who consume alcohol are seven times
more likely to have sexual intercourse and twice as likely to have four
or more sexual partners than non-drinking peers. Research shows they
are also more likely to have unprotected sex, risking sexuallytransmitted diseases and pregnancy.
Increased Risk for Alcoholism and Drug Addiction
• A study by the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism
offers scientific validation that young people who began drinking before
age 15 are four times more likely to develop alcoholism than those who
began drinking at age 21 or later.
• Current research explains that areas of an adolescent’s brain that
control impulsive behavior are not fully developed, yet circuits that
reinforce the effect of chemical use are already operating in high gear.
This puts young people who experiment even briefly with alcohol, drugs
and tobacco at greater risk of becoming addicted.
Every day that teenagers choose not to use illegal substances improves
their chances of avoiding alcohol, drug or tobacco addiction and helps
to prevent many irreversible consequences of using chemical
substances.
6
Is Your Child Using
Alcohol or Drugs?
Parents often wonder what is “normal” for teen behavior?”
Try evaluating your teen on a daily basis from a health perspective just
like you did when they were younger. For example, if you notice a change
in energy level with your teen, you’d go through a mental checklist, with
items like this:
•
•
•
•
How many late nights and early risings?
Have they been missing meals?
Have they got a fever or earache?
Are they complaining of any pain?
After reviewing this list, if you are not satisfied with a reasonable
explanation, you’d want to investigate further.
What are the signs?
The following outlines:
• Physical Signs
• Behavioral Signs
• Other Indicators
• The Importance of Recognizing Depression/Anxiety
• Red Flags that Indicate Need for Immediate Professional Help
Trust Your Instincts!
If you have suspicion or evidence that something is wrong, it probably is.
You don’t need “proof” to take action. See the section If You Suspect Your
Child is Using Alcohol or Drugs to take action.
7
Physical Signs of
Substance Use
• Smell of alcohol, marijuana or tobacco
• Slurred speech, impaired coordination, disorientation
• Red, glassy eyes or dilated pupils
• Vomiting or shakes
• Extremely difficult to awaken
• Respiratory or digestive problems
• Physical injuries
• Marked change in weight and/or appetite
• Excessive yawning and sleepiness, change in sleep
patterns
• Memory lapses and/or concentration difficulties
8
Behavioral Signs of
Substance Use
•
Curfew violations and/or constant defiance of rules
• Excessive or last-minute requests to sleep at a friend’s
house
• Frequent use of eye drops or breath mints
• Withdrawal from family and/or friends
• Pronounced mood swings; increase irritability and/or
hostile outbursts
• Changes in friends and/or extracurricular activities
• Tardiness, truancy at school
• Decreased academic performance
• Changes in personal appearance (i.e. dress, hygiene,
grooming)
• Overly preoccupied with privacy or secrecy, lying
• Suspected of vandalism and/or stealing
• Talks positively about alcohol or drug use
• Repeated requests for money
9
Other Indicators of
Substance Use
• Alcohol, medications, money or valuables missing
• Alcohol or drug paraphernalia stashed in pockets,
drawers, etc. (i.e. a medicine bottle prescribed to another
person; empty alcohol containers/baggies/light
bulbs/aerosol cans; tweezers, matches and lighters)
• Over-the-counter medications in adolescent’s possession
(i.e. Robitussin, Nyquil, etc.)
10
The Importance of
Recognizing Depression &
Anxiety in Teens
It is estimated that 65-75 % of teens who abuse substances
have coexisting depression, anxiety disorders or other mental
illnesses.
Although it is common for teens to experience frequent mood swings,
your teen may be experiencing a form of depression if clusters of the
following thoughts, feelings, and behaviors persist for two weeks or
longer. Prompt identification and treatment of depression can reduce its
durations and severity.
Signs That May Be Associated With Depression in Adolescents
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Sadness that won’t go away
Sullen, silent, withdrawn behavior
Persistent “boredom”
Frequent vague, non-specific physical complaints such as
headaches, muscle aches, stomachaches or tiredness
Frequent absences from school or poor performance in school
Outbursts of shouting, complaining or crying
Unexplained irritability, anger, hostility; reckless or rebellious
behavior
Alcohol or substance abuse
Extreme sensitivity to rejection or failure
Feelings of hopelessness/worthlessness
Changes in eating or sleeping habits
Lack of interest in hanging out with friends; loss of interest in
activities
Social isolation, poor communication, difficulty with relationships
Recurring thoughts of death or suicide
(Adapted from U.S. Department of Health and Human Services publication)
KNOW YOUR FAMILY HISTORY of mental health issues. Depression,
anxiety, addictive and compulsive behavior can have genetic components.
11
Red Flags
Seek Professional Help Immediately if Your Child:
• Steals
• Runs away from home
• Shows violent behavior
• Threatens or attempts suicide
The following crisis resources are available:
• Emergency:
• Crisis Connection
• Suicide/Psychiatric Hotline
Dial 911
612-379-6363
612-873-2222
12
Prevention and Safety
We have to stay connected with our kids. Whether
or not they ever get involved with alcohol or drugs,
adolescents need to know that their parents know
about and care about what goes on in their lives.”
-David Walsh, Ph.D.
You can help prevent alcohol and drug use by staying connected with
your teen, communicating clear expectations, and using discipline and
consequences.
Parents must provide teens with clear and consistent expectations, limits
and consequences. Prevention includes communication with your teen,
with other parents and setting ground rules for behavior.
Use the following pages as resources for :
• General Parenting Tips to Promote Connection and
Communication
• Staying Connected – Eat Dinner Together!
• Connect with Other Parents
• 8 Great Ways to Keep Youth Safe
• Keeping Your Teen Safe When They Go Out
• Dealing with Parties
• Should You Create an Abstinence Contract?
• What to Do if You Suspect There is a Problem
13
Prevention – Prevention Through Parenting
Parenting Tips that Really Work
with Teens
• Discuss your family’s values, rules and
expectations for behavior. Be clear about your
value system, and remind your teen often.
• Don’t be afraid to set limits. Be consistent and predictable. Teens do
better when they know what the limits are for their behavior, despite
what they may tell you!
• Promote health and safety. Monitor your teen’s whereabouts, be aware
of driving arrangements, and call other parents to check out activities,
chaperoning etc. ahead of time.
• Know your teen’s friends.
• Encourage communication Listen when they are speaking to you, and
give positive reinforcement for coming to you by sayings things like,
“That’s a great question.” or I’m really glad you told me about this.”
• Provide discipline when necessary Be clear from the outset what the
consequences will be for breaking a family, rule, then stick to it. Not
following through on appropriate discipline teaches kids that parents
can’t be trusted to provide boundaries. Remember that discipline is a
part of teaching teens how to behave in successful ways.
• Support appropriate rules and consequences at school and in the
community. Teens respond best when expectations and consequences
are consistent. It seems confusing and hypocritical to kids if unhealthy
behaviors are accepted at home but not at school, for example.
• Give as much positive reinforcement as possible When teens do well,
tell them! It really does matter to them what the adults in their lives
think!
14
Prevention – Prevention Through Parenting
Staying Connected – Eat
Dinner Together!
Dinner time provides CONNECTION.
“Mealtime is often the only time in the whole day when everybody’s in the
same room having a conversation”, says William Doherty, Ph.D., author of The
Intentional Family (Addison Wesley Longman, 1997).
How do you make the most of dinner time together?
• Think of it as the way to “check in” and note how everyone is doing.
• Keep problem solving for another time and place. If you note that someone
needs some extra attention to an issue, have a private conversation after
dinner.
• Ask a non-threatening question that everyone gets to respond to. Find some
great questions on the Tri City Partners website at www.tricitypartners.org..
• Listen
o
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Teens “process” their life through the “telling”. They literally have
to talk about where they are at, so they can move to the next stage
of development. Be patient, and allow them to talk.
By simply listening, you are helping them grow and develop.
If teens see that we don’t listen to them, they will stop talking.
Force yourself to listen. If necessary, count to 100 before
responding and avoid giving unwanted advice or lecturing
• Tell everyone at the table how much you love them, adore them, admire
them....etc!
• Have a joke night, where everyone is encouraged to share a joke.
• Have everyone help with preparation and cleanup. It’s important for all
children to have meaningful roles and responsibilities in the family. These
tasks prepare teens for independent living as young adults, and give them a
sense of accomplishment.
• Rituals and cultural traditions can be shared over dinner.
15
Prevention – Prevention Through Parenting
Connecting with Other Parents
Getting to know other parents in the community is key in keeping in
touch with your teen. Here are some ways you can facilitate open lines of
communication with other parents.
• Get to know the parents of your teenager's friends.
• Let them know your expectations and guidelines with respect to
supervision (at parties and otherwise)
• Check in with parents when they are hosting a party
• Step up and do your part by helping to chaperone, providing food and
beverages, or helping with clean up
• Thank parents who host "safe home" events
• Attend parenting forums and classes. Edina PCN and Edina Family
Center offer parent education for parents of teens.
• Form parent groups of your own to network with other families.
• Use "bleacher talk" to bring up situations you are aware of or have
questions about. These can range from spring break trips to Mexico to
parties to curfew.
16
Keeping Your Teen Safe
8 Great Ways to Keep Youth
Safe
1. Clearly tell your children (every time they go out!) your
expectations that they not use illegal substances. Statistics tell us
that the #1 reason kids choose to refrain from illegal substances is
because they don’t want to disappoint their parents.
2. Talk to your children in advance about situations that may arise
around alcohol, drugs and tobacco.
3. In order to remove themselves from uncomfortable situations, give
your children permission to use you as their “scapegoat” to their
peers.
4. Offer your children a safe ride home if they are ever in a situation
that threatens their safety. Assure them that no questions will be
asked until you can have a calm and caring discussion regarding
that situation.
5. Remove or keep alcohol in a locked area of your home to avoid
temptation for your children or your children’s friends.
6. Get to know your children’s friends and their parents. Kids have a
hotline of communication....develop a network among parents, as
well.
7. Establish clear “sleepover” rules or ban sleepovers altogether.
Teens will often spend the night away from home if they plan to
use illegal substances.
8. Tell your child you will be checking up on their plans, and then do
it. This is “truth through verification.”
17
Keeping Your Teen Safe
Keeping Your Teenager Safe When
They Go Out
• Know where they are.
• Use curfews. Set and consistently enforce curfew times.
• Be awake and interact with your children when they come home.
Edina Curfews (these are laws):
Age
Weekdays
Fridays and Saturday
Under 12
Home by 9:00 PM
Home by 10:00 PM
12-14
Home by 10:00 PM
Home by 10:00 PM
15-17
Home by 11:00 PM
Home by midnight
The curfew laws apply year around.
18
Keeping Your Teen Safe
Teen Parties
Are They Safe?
Attending and Hosting Teen Parties
Teens in Edina tell us that parties are the places where they are most
likely exposed to substance use. It is up to parents to provide safe, and
reliable places for teens to hang out together.
The following pages outline guidelines for letting your teen attend parties
and for hosting parties at your home.
19
Keeping Your Teen Safe
Should I Let My Teen Attend a
Party?
Follow your instincts as well as consider these guidelines:
• Ask your child if the parents are going to be home. Let them know you
will be calling the parents to insure they will be at chaperoning the
party
• Call the parent of the host/hostess
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Verify the occasion, location and that there will be
appropriate adult supervision
Verify that there will be no alcohol or other drugs permitted
Offer assistance with chaperoning
Offer to bring food or beverages (this is a great ice-breaker if
you don't know the other parents)
Verify start and end times of the party.
• Know where your teen will be and have them check in
ƒ When your teen checks in with a cell phone, ask to speak
with the parent who is in charge, OR make a call to the
“landline” to verify.
ƒ Know how your teen will get to and from the party
ƒ Assure that you (or a specified neighbor or friend) can be
called if he/she needs a ride home AND discuss with your
teen why and how that might occur
ƒ Provide any phone contact info to your teen, if you will not
be at home
ƒ Have a “code word” that your teen may use when he/she
calls you in order to discretely get out of a bad situation
ƒ Assure your teen that he/she can call you in ANY situation
of concern
ƒ Remind your child never to get in a car with a driver who has
been drinking
• Designate a firm time they have to be home
20
Keeping Your Teen Safe – Teens Attending Parties
• Be awake when they come home
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This can be a good way to check the time, as well as talk
about the evening
Talk to your teen “face to face” and “eye to eye”; this is a
good physical “checkup” for signs of illegal substance use
• Be prepared if there is an overnight. Many parents find tht overnights
are not worth the hassle. However, if your teen is going to stay
overnight for a party, make sure you check out things ahead of time:
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Call the parents of the friend hosting the overnight to verify
the plan, and that it is acceptable to them
Verify that the parents will be home and that you all agree to
curfew hours
Verify that the teens will be staying home once they arrive
there
Verify that the parent will be awake when the teens come
home to “check in”
• Review the first five Great Ways to Keep Youth Safe guidelines.
Thank parents who host "safe home" events!
21
Keeping Your Teen Safe
Hosting a Party for Teenagers
Teens love parties. If your teenager wants to have a
party at your house, how should you approach it? Be
ready! Teens are, by nature, spontaneous creatures,
so they may want to put something together quickly.
Whether you’re planning a party weeks in advance, or
just throwing something together, keep in the mind
the following guidelines for planning and having the party.
Before Hosting a Party
• Set the tone with guidelines:
• Explain to your teen that you are legally responsible
for anything that happens to a minor who has been served drugs or
alcohol in your home.
• Go over the party plans and activities with your teen (and their friends).
Encourage them to plan organized activities or to have a theme.
• Let your teen know your expectations. Share your views on alcoholand drug-free parties.
• Make a clear rule that no duffels, bags, water bottles or coffee shop
cups will be allowed.
• Find out what food and beverages your teen wants to serve.
• Develop and prominently post family guidelines – make them clear and
succinct!
• Decide on the guest list (10-15 youth per adult chaperone).
• If you planning in advance, prepare party invitations, and avoid email
invites as these can be forwarded to others, possibly putting you and
your teen in a difficult situation with party crashers. (A creatively
designed hard copy can be used for “admittance” and make a special
memory for the evening.)
• Avoid open house parties. They are difficult to control.
22
Keeping Your Teen Safe: Hosting a Teen Party
At the Party
Adults should be present throughout the party.
• If you can, hold the party in the main part of the house- you can
be a presence more naturally.
• Bring out snacks, and non-alcoholic beverages throughout the
night.
• Designate other responsible adults to help chaperone.
• Keep the lights on
• Insure guests leave at curfew time
Alcohol or other drugs should not be served or allowed or available.
• Be alert to any alcohol or drug use.
• Uninvited guests or those bringing alcohol or drugs should be
asked to leave.
• Call appropriate law enforcement, if necessary. Do not allow
anyone under the influence of illegal substances to go home alone
or to drive.
• Be ready to notify parents if anyone needs a safe ride home.
• Anyone who leaves the party should not be allowed to return.
Of course you might hear “No one will want to come over here with all
these rules,” but once you get through one party together, you will both
trust each other to do more.
23
Abstinence Contracts
An abstinence contract can be a valuable tool for expressing values and
outlining expectations and consequences.
How does an Abstinence Contract work between teens & parents? What
are the advantages? How do you develop a contract? The following
pages answer these questions as well as provide a framework for
developing a contract.
• Reasons to Develop a Abstinence Contract
• Why Are Contracts Effective?
• General Guidelines about Abstinence Contracts
• Developing the Contract
• Guidelines for Follow-up
• Consequences for Breaking the Contract
• Two Sample Contracts
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Keeping Your Teen Safe - Abstinence Contracts
Reasons for Employing an Abstinence Contract
• It provides an incentive to avoid illegal substances
• It is helpful if your teen is in a new school
(This transition time can be difficult, so a contract provides a strong
foundation for your teen in this new situation
• Your child isn’t participating in school-sanctioned athletics or
extracurricular activities which mandate a signed abstinence contrac
• You need an opportunity to discuss your beliefs about illegal substance
use
• If trust has been broken by prior substance use, this contract can
provide a fresh step for you both.
Why Are Abstinence Contracts Effective?
• Teenagers believe that they have absolute power and control over their
world. When they work with you to develop a contract, they generally
sign it out of a sincere belief that they are in control of their chemical
use.
• A formal contract helps to clearly define your mutual expectations for
abstinence from illegal substances, and outlines consequences for
chemical use.
• Once the contract is initiated, any chemical use brings your child into
violation of the contract and into conflict with their choice to use an
illegal substance.
• If they are able to refrain from chemical use, the contract has worked.
• If they are unable to refrain from chemical use, then the contract works
by revealing their denial about chemical use.
The #1 reason kids choose to refrain from illegal substance use is ecause
they don’t want to disappoint their parents. Talk to your kids today.
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Keeping Your Teen Safe - Abstinence Contracts
General Guidelines about Abstinence
Contracts
• The abstinence contract will be most effective if
you write it together.
• Keep your contract simple. It only needs to
contain four elements:
• Date of agreement
• Clear expectation of the child abstaining from all illegal substances
• Clear consequences for violation of contract
• Signatures of all parties agreeing to contract
• Follow through with the consequences of the contract.
• Keep a business-like approach to the contracting process.
26
Keeping Your Teen Safe - Abstinence Contracts
Developing an Abstinence Contract
BEFORE beginning the contract process with your child:
• List all possible consequences if your child violates the contract.
• List all the reasons you would follow through with consequences.
• List the reasons your child would give for not wanting to agree to
abstain from illegal substance use or refusing to sign the
contract. Determine what you will you do if your child refuses to
sign a contract agreeing to be substance-free.
• Make an appointment to meet with your child in a place free
from distractions (i.e. TV, phone, friends, siblings, etc.) Allow one
hour.
As you are creating the contract:
• Clearly out line your position on the use of illegal substances and
share your honest concerns with your child.
• Tell your child that you will always give them a safe, calm ride
home with no discussion or questions until the following day.
• Ask your children to name other caring adults in their life that
they believe would help them if asked.
• DISENGAGE! Don’t bring up other issues.
The goal of the contract is not to make them feel trapped, but rather to
let them make choices, knowing what the consequences will be if they
choose to use illegal substances.
Make one copy of the contract for you and one for your child. You must
sign both copies. Give your child one copy at the end of your meeting.
Once the contract has been signed, the meeting is over. Back off and let
the contract take effect.
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Keeping Your Teen Safe - Abstinence Contracts
Abstinence Contract Follow-up and Enforcement
• Do not lecture about the contract. Constant reference to the contract
will build anger and resentment in your child.
• Monitor your child’s behavior and activities
• If your intuition tells you something is wrong, it probably is. There is
no need to wait for proof. Trust your instincts. Act now!
• Enforce the contract. If your child violates the contract, enforce the
consequences immediately!
• Do not allow your child to renegotiate the terms after the contract has
been violated.
• Use escalating consequences. Start with one of the least-severe
consequences and increase severity as necessary.
• If the contract is violated and a consequence has been instituted, then
negotiate a new contract with a more severe consequence.
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Keeping Your Teen Safe - Abstinence Contracts
Consequences for "Breach of Contract"
There are different levels of consequences. Choose the
consequences that are meaningful to your child and are
in line with their actions.
Some sample consequences could include:
• Lose use of car, cell phone, TV, iPod, video games, computer, etc.
• Earlier curfew time
• Spend a weekend night with parents watching the DVD “Smashed”
• Grounding from going out with friends or having friends visit
• Participate in a drug education program
• Get chemical dependency evaluation
• Participate in chemical dependency treatment program
• Participate in random drug testing
• Resign from extra-curricular activities
• Lose driving privileges
• Parent turning child in to school or police
(meeting with school police liaison???)
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Keeping Your Teen Safe - Abstinence Contracts
Samples of Abstinence Contracts
Example #1:
Date:__________________________________________
By signing this contract, I ________________________________________________,
Child’s name
agree to remain alcohol, tobacco, and drug-free.
If I violate this contract, I agree to:
(insert consequences here)
_______________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________
______________________________________
Signature of Child
___________________________
Signature of Adult
=====================================================
Example #2:
Date:_______________________________
By signing this contract, I __________________________________________________,
agree to the following:
1. To remain alcohol, tobacco and drug-free.
2. To not attend parties or other gatherings where alcohol, tobacco and drugs are
being used or sold.
3. To call you, or another caring adult, for a ride home if I am ever in a situation
that threatens my safety. We will defer discussion about the situation until both
of us can have a calm and caring conversation.
4. Besides you, I feel comfortable calling the following person(s):
• ______________________________
• ______________________________
If I violate this contract, I agree to (insert consequences here)
_____________________________________
Signature of Teen
_______________________________
Signature of Parent
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If You Suspect Your Child
is Using Alcohol or
Other Drugs
See the Crisis numbers on the last page of this document
if you think your teen may need immediate help.
If you suspect your teen is using drugs or alcohol, it is time to
take action.
Here’s a “jump start” method
to facilitate quick action:
Make an appointment with your teen’s physician
OR
Contact the EHS Chemical/Mental Health Coordinator
Call the Edina Schools Chemical and Mental Health Coordinator
at 952-826-3028 to discuss options and get advice.
This is a confidential exchange. All information will remain private
between you and the Chemical Health Counselor.
Otherwise, consider your options:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
Do nothing
Ask your child to submit to a drug test
Get a chemical dependency evaluation for your child
Enroll your child in a drug/alcohol education program
Seek more information
Create or join a support group
The Edina Chemical Health Partners believes that ANY use of
alcohol or drugs by teens merits action.
For details on each option, see the following pages.
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If You Suspect Your Child is Using Alcohol/Other Drugs
“What Do I Do Now?
Option One:
Do nothing .
Do nothing....some parents believe that chemical use by an adolescent is only
experimentation and a normal part of the adolescent life stage, a phase they will
grow out of.
Other parents believe that if the adolescent gets into enough trouble, he or she will
stop using on his or her own.
The philosophy of the Edina Chemical Health Department is:
the use of mind-altering substances poses a great risk to the emotional, psychological,
spiritual, and intellectual development of a young person and that their use cannot be
tolerated for any reason.
For adolescents, addiction can occur in as little as six months. Doing nothing poses a
risk for addiction.
Option Two:
Ask your child to submit to a drug test.
This is a helpful tool to help a child gain back trust or to confirm the suspicions of a
parent. Also, it can be a positive tool for helping teens remain sober. Teens agreeing
to drug tests can use this fact as a reason to turn down drugs offered by friends to
avoid further trouble. Drug tests can be administered through your regular medical
clinic, or through Minnesota Monitoring for kits that are designed for home use 1888-875-3486 (www.mnmonitoring.com)
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If You Suspect Your Child is Using Alcohol/Other Drugs
Option Three:
Get a chemical dependency evaluation for your child.
If your child is using drugs or alcohol, he or she has a relationship with
chemicals. A chemical dependency evaluation conducted by a chemical
health specialist could give more information about the nature and
extent of the relationship.
If your child is experiencing family, legal, academic, or personal
problems, or is working far below his or her potential, chemical abuse
may be an underlying cause.
Option Four:
Enroll your child in a drug/alcohol education program.
Drug and alcohol education programs are designed to provide parents
and teens with information about drug/alcohol abuse and its harmful
consequences.
Using these programs, families can have informed discussions and make
informed decisions.
Option Five:
Seek more information.
As a parent, you have the right to seek more information about your
child and his/her chemical use.
• Check Ed-Line for information on your student's assignments, tests
and grades.
• Contact parents of his/her friends to learn more about his/her peer
group, their habits, and their hobbies. Other parents may have
concerns or information they could share with you to shed more light
on your child’s behavior and chemical use.
• Use the resources listed at the back of this document for more
specific information on drug abuse.
• Get yourself into counseling to assist in developing strategies for
dealing with this issue.
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If You Suspect Your Child is Using Alcohol/Other Drugs
Option Six: Create or join a support group.
Sharing your experiences with other parents will help to empower you
and break the sense of isolation that can surround this issue. Other
parents may have experiences or information that is helpful to you.
Evaluate the Options
Study the options listed above. Rate the options from 1 to 6 (with 1 being the option
you are most in favor of, and 6 being the option you are least in favor of).
Rating
Option
__________
Do Nothing
__________
Ask your child to submit to a drug test
__________
Get a chemical dependency evaluation for your child
__________
Enroll your child in a drug/alcohol education program
__________
Seek more information
__________
Create or join a support group
Below, list the reasons you are attracted to the option you selected as most favorable.
Below, list the reasons you were not attracted to the option you selected as least
favorable.
TAKE ACTION based on the above.
Source: Jenson, John “The Intervention Papers.” Fargo, N.D: Professional Resource Network Publishing, 1998
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If You Suspect Your Child is Using Alcohol/Other Drugs
Confronting Your Teen if You Think They
Have a Substance Problem
• Do not confront a person about his or her use when
the person is high or drunk. Wait until later when
the effects of the drug have completely worn off.
Expect the person to react defensively. A person with a substance abuse
problem will vehemently deny having one. The person may lash out at
you and try to convince you that only you have a problem.
• State your intentions: you are confronting the person out of care and
concern, no blame or judgment. You intend to be helpful and assist the
person in regaining control over his or her life.
State your motivation: you care about the person and what happens to
him/her. If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t bring it up.
• Be firm in your presentation. Persist in trying to make the person
realize that the situation is out of control. Come prepared with specific
examples of out-of-control behavior.
Present your observation of the person’s behavior.
Focus on what you see happening to the person
and the lives of those around him or her. Be very specific.
• Express how the person’s behavior makes you feel. Express your
feelings clearly.
State why you think the person needs help in stopping the addiction.
Many other people have recovered from addiction and gone on to lead
successful lives. Getting well and staying well often requires the help of
others.
• State what you will do next. This could include assisting the person in
getting help as well as involving other significant people in the person’s
life in an intervention.
Source: Falkowski, Carol. “Dangerous Drugs: An Easy-to-Use Reference for Parents and
Professionals.” Center City, MN: Hazelden, 2000
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School Policies and the Law
School and Legal Consequences of
Student Chemical Substance Use
EHS Policy for Student Chemical Substance Use
Edina Public Schools has policies and procedures regarding chemical
substance violations. Please refer to the Rights and Responsibilities for
Student Management document found on the Edina School District web
site at http://www.edina.k12.mn.us (click on PARENTS tab, then “Rights
and Responsibilities” on the drop down).
A direct link to the handbook is:
http://www.edina.k12.mn.us/parents/rightshandbook.pdf.
The following only outlines the general policy. See referenced links for
details.
EHS General Policy
All students in the Edina School District are strictly prohibited from possessing,
using, or distributing chemical substances and/or related paraphernalia,
including the misuse of prescription drugs, and non-prescription
medications/products.
Chemical substances include:
Tobacco, alcohol, illegal drugs, prescription drugs without a physician’s order or
used incorrectly, and all over-the-counter drugs or household products that are
misused in order to cause mind-altering effects. Minors are in violation of the
law if any of the above substances are used, distributed, or are in their
possession.
Athletics Policy for Student Chemical Substance Use
Visit EHS Athletic Department website at
http://www.edina.k12.mn.us/athletics. Select the “Students Activity
Handbook” to read the document that contains the chemical use policy.
Legal Consequences for Student Chemical Substance Use
Contact the Edina High School Police Liaison ((phone 952-848-3809) or
the Edina Police Department for clarification on law enforcement
policy/procedures.
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Resources
Community & Parenting Resources
Edina Resource Center
The “one-stop” resource info center in Edina
www.edinaresourcecenter.com/
Edina Parent Communication Network
Informative parent forums on a variety of topics offered throughout the school
year www.edinapcn.com/
Tri City Partners
Work to promote health, reduce risks, and build assets in our youth,
in the communities of Bloomington, Edina, and Richfield
www.tricitypartners.org
Shoulder To Shoulder
Parent resource information, some unique info on teens today
www.shouldertoshoulderminnesota.org
Search Institute
An independent non-profit organization whose mission is to provide leadership,
knowledge, and resources to promote healthy children, youth and communities
www.search-institute.org
Putting Family First
Grassroots, community-wide organization, raising awareness about finding
balance in our over-scheduled lives.
www.puttingfamilyfirst.org
Time IN for Family
Southwest Minneapolis organization with the mission of changing the culture
of over-scheduled and under-connected families by breaking down barriers to
putting family time first.
www.timeinforfamily.org
Positive Parenting Program
Through U of M Extension Service
www.extension.umn.edu/projects/positiveparenting/index.html
U of M Center for Adolescent Health and Development
www.allaboutkids.umn.edu
Minnesota Alliance with Youth
www.mnyouth.org
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Resources - continued
Substance-Related Sites and
National Resources
The Anti-Drug
Drug prevention information and parent education center
www.theantidrug.com
Drugs.com
Contains a pill identifier that can you help identify suspect drugs.
www.drugs.com
National Institute on Drug Abuse
Parent Resource
www.nida.nih.gov
National Institute on Drug Abuse for Teens
www.teens.drugabuse.gov
National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA).
The young teen’s place for information on alcohol and resisting peer pressure
www.thecoolspot.gov
Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration
Agency of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services
www.samhsa.gov
Talking with kids about tough issues
www.talkingwithkids.org
Harvard School of Public Health
Center for Healthy Communication Parenting Project
www.hsph.harvard.edu/chc/parenting/raising.html
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Resources - continued
Edina High School Resources
For Teens and Families
Edina High School Career Resource Center
www.edina.k12.mn.us/edinahigh/counseling/index.htm
Edina High Social Worker
www.edina.k12.mn.us/edinahigh/departments/socialworker/index.htm
Edina High School
Main Office ..................................................................... 952-848-3800
Chemical/Mental Health Coordinator for Edina Schools.....952-848-3028
Guidance Office ................................................................ 952-848-3131
Police Liaison Officer ....................................................... 952-848-3809
School Nurse ....................................................................952-848-3075
Social Worker .................................................................. 952-848-3139
District website: www.edina.k12.mn.us
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Resources - continued
Information and Referral Services
Acute Psychiatric Services ......................... ................ ..... 612-873-3161
(Hennepin County Medical Center)
First Call For Help ................ .......................................... Dial 211
Edina Resource Center .......................... ......................... 952-848-3936
National Drug/Alcohol Help Line ........ ...........................1-800-821-4357
Minnesota Monitoring (drug testing) ................ . ........ 1-888-875-3486
Crisis Help
Emergency ................ ................ ..... ..................... ..... Dial 911
Crisis Connection................ ............... ........... ........... 612-379-6363
Suicide/Psychiatric Hotline..................... .................
612-873-2222
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APPENDIX A: Example of House Rules Document
Welcome to Our Home
We’re glad you are here!
Please be aware of the rules in our
home:
1. No alcohol use
2. No chemical use
3. No tobacco use
4.
No open containers – coffee cups,
water bottles, etc.
We will provide the beverages.
5. If anything gets broken, please tell us.
6.
The gathering is inside only.
Once you leave the house, you are gone for the
evening.
7.
Our doors close at: ________________
Please arrange for your ride to be here by then.
Have fun, and if you need
anything, just ask!
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