Lower Key Stage 2
West Sussex
Teacher Assessment
Exemplification:
End of Lower Key
Stage 2
(Non-statutory)
English writing
Working at expected standard
Annotated version
Autumn 2016
© West Sussex County Council 2016
Page 1
Lower Key Stage 2
Key principles
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The non-statutory West Sussex interim framework is to be
used only to make a teacher assessment judgement at the
end of lower key stage 2, following the completion of the year
3/4 curriculum. It is not intended to be used to track progress
throughout the key stage. The West Sussex interim framework does not include full
coverage of the content of the national curriculum and focuses
on key aspects for assessment. Pupils achieving the different
standards within this interim framework will be able to
demonstrate a broader range of skills than those being
assessed. The West Sussex interim framework is not intended to guide
individual programmes of study, classroom practice or
methodology. Teachers must base their teacher assessment judgement on a
broad range of evidence from across the curriculum for each
pupil. Individual pieces of work should be assessed according to a
school’s assessment policy and not against this interim
framework. Some of the statements contain qualifiers (‘some’, ‘most’) to
indicate that pupils will not always consistently demonstrate the
skill required. However, where they have been used, they have
consistent meaning with ‘most’ indicating that the statement is
generally met with only occasional errors and ‘some’ indicating that
the skill/knowledge is starting to be acquired, and is demonstrated
correctly on occasion, but is not consistent or frequent.
Teachers should refer to the National Curriculum programmes of
study for spellings and other items marked with *. The collection is annotated in a similar layout to national materials.
Refer to the 2016 teacher assessment exemplification: end of KS 1
and KS 2.
© West Sussex County Council 2016
Page 2
West Sussex non-statutory interim teacher assessment framework at the end of
Lower Key Stage 2 (Year 4)
Working towards the expected standard (WTS)
The pupil can write for different purposes:
 use the full range of punctuation taught at key stage 1 mostly correctly
 use expanded noun phrases to describe and specify characters and plots
 use some paragraph/sections to organise ideas
 use sentences of different forms including some sentence structures with more than one clause
 use past and present tense correctly and consistently
 use some cohesive devices * e.g. co-ordinating and subordinating conjunctions, adverbs and
prepositions (to express time and cause) and nouns and pronouns (for clarity and to avoid
repetition)
 use co-ordination (e.g. or/and/but) and subordination (e.g. when /if /that /because)
 using direct speech with some punctuation
 spelling most contracted forms correctly *
 adding suffixes to spell most words correctly e.g. –ment,-less, -ness, -ful, -ly *
 spelling most words correctly (year 1 and 2) *
 spelling some words correctly (year 3 and 4)*
 use diagonal and horizontal strokes needed to join letters in most of their writing
Working at expected standard (EXS)
The pupil can write for an increasing range of audiences and purposes:
 use paragraphs to organise ideas mostly correctly and consistently
 create/describe settings, characters and plots
 use an increasing range of cohesive devices * within and across sentences and paragraphs
including co-ordinating and subordinating conjunctions, adverbs and prepositions (to express
time and cause) and nouns and pronouns (for clarity and to avoid repetition)
 use different verb forms (progressive/present/present perfect/past tense)
 use some varied sentence structures with more than one clause including a wider range of
conjunctions (co-ordinating and subordinating conjunctions)
 use fronted adverbials
 use commas for clarity after fronted adverbials
 use inverted commas in direct speech
 use capital letters, full stops, question marks, exclamation marks, commas for lists and
apostrophes for contraction/possessive apostrophe with plural nouns mostly correctly
 spelling most words correctly (year 1 and 2) -see list *
 spelling most words correctly ( year 3 and 4) including further prefixes, suffixes and homophonessee list *
 produce legible joined handwriting
Working at greater depth within the expected standard (GDS)
The pupil can write for a wide range of audience and purposes:
 increase the consistency and quality of their handwriting
 select vocabulary (nouns and pronouns) appropriately for clarity and cohesion and to avoid
repetition
 spell year 1 to year 4 words accurately and apply rules and patterns proficiently *
© West Sussex County Council 2016
Page 3
Working at the expected standard: Year 4 collection
This collection demonstrates evidence that the pupil is able to produce writing that just
meets all the statements for the “working at the expected standard” of the West Sussex
Interim end of lower key stage 2 framework across a range of tasks. Each of which is
adapted for purpose and audience.
The collection is presented in chronological order and demonstrates the progress and
embedding of skills. The collection includes:
A. Science Non-Chronological Report: How The Heart Works
B. Reading Journal Reviews: Harry Potter and The Midnight Folk
C. Diary Entry: Developing Characterisation
D. Persuasive Advert: Seaman For Antarctica Voyage
E. Ship’s Log: Antarctic Journey
F. Narrative: Grendel’s Attack
G. Opening to First World War Narrative
Writing comes from a range of curriculum experiences including science, class reading
and research, role play/drama and exploration of different text types. Most pieces have
been discussed with the class teacher and peers, planned, drafted, proofread and edited
over several sessions. Some edits have been made through the writing process and
include peer discussions and self-assessment to improve clarity and impact on reader
with different vocabulary choices. All writing is independent.
Purposeful tasks enable the pupil to develop and demonstrate an increasing awareness
of audience. There is a clear development in the use of paragraphing to build coherence
and cohesion within tasks. The increased use of reference chains/vocabulary themes and
pronouns support cohesion. The use of varied sentence structures demonstrates use of
different conjunctions/subordination and sentences with more than one clause. Fronted
adverbials further support cohesion and demonstrate variation in sentence forms;
commas for clarity are evident.
Across the collection, the writing demonstrates growing consistency of all the statements
within ‘ working at the expected standard’ and all of the statements in the preceding
standard.
The narrative tasks reflect the use of more challenging texts and confidence within the
writer to experiment and reinforce taught skills.
Vocabulary choices support the development of creating settings and characters, e.g.
The Ship’s Log (the water bubbled and splashed like a waterfall.) and the Grendel
narrative (the loathsome creature could do nothing but.). Punctuation is mostly correct
with evidence of apostrophes for contraction/possessives apostrophes and commas for
clarity.
Despite some occasional errors and inconsistences, spelling is mostly correct utilising
rules from year 2, 3/ 4 programmes of study. The Able Seaman advert, albeit a brief
task, was included to demonstrate independent application of many year 3/4 spelling
patterns. Handwriting is generally legible and joined.
This collection meets the requirements for ‘working at the
expected standard’ using the West Sussex lower Key Stage 2
interim statements.
© West Sussex County Council 2016
Page 4
Piece A: Non-chronological report.
As part of a project on human life, pupils were asked to research and create a
fact sheet of body organ of their choice (list created by class) The pupils were
able to take notes from information books. The class discussed how they had
created information texts in year 3 to reinforce use of textual features and
support purpose. The information was accompanied with a labelled diagram
C = Composition
This concise nonchronological report was
created to be part of a
class information book on
the body and how the
organs work.
Independent research was
undertaken; following
taking notes, pupils had to
explain to learn
partners/small groups the
functions of their selected
organ using a
diagram/drawing to
support them.
Pupils used their notes to
produce full sentences.
This fact sheet is organised
into three sections with
details that are appropriate
to the defined headings.
Pronouns support cohesion
and avoid repetition
(some/others/them/it)
(C)
Use of that creates a
relative clause
referring back to the
preceding noun- the
heart (Year 5/6) (GP)
GP = Grammar and Punctuation
T = Transcription
Relevant to non-
How Your Heart Works
Our Blood Cells
= Deoxygenated A red blood cell picks up oxygen
and delivers it to the lungs. White
blood
get rid of germs by swallowing
= Oxygenated
them. A drop of blood contains
blood
7,000 white blood cells. Some
patrol the body like soldiers.
Others produce chemicals that
stick to germs and make them
easier to kill. 44% Parts of 100 are
red blood cells, 1% is white blood
cells, and 55% are plasma.
The Heart
Blood is pumped
around your body by
your heart. The heart
is a powerful muscular
pump that never stops
beating. The right side
sends blood only to
the lungs to get
oxygen.
Fun Fact!
Your heart only
stops when
you’re dead. It
carries on
pumping at
night.
Consistent use of
present tense
throughout (GP)
Commas used
correctly in a list
(GP)
Exclamation
mark used to add
interest.
(GP)
Use of subordinate
conjunction to
clarify a fact (GP)
Expanded noun
phrase used to
describe the
action of the
heart (GP)
Apostrophes for
contraction correct
(GP)
Spelling is mostly correct – (blood, soldiers,
muscular, produce, chemicals, heartincluding year 5/6 words)
Use of contracted forms (you’re) and the
addition of suffixes (powerful, beating,
swallowing, pumped) (T)
© West Sussex County Council 2016
chronological
report format.
Use of short
factual
sentences
factual (GP)
Page 5
Piece B: Reading Journal and Library Recommendation.
Pupils are continually questioned about book choices and encouraged to explore
more challenging texts. The children are provided with personal book journals to
note/write in as they progress through texts; some cue questions are provided
to broaden reflection. The school library is always in use and displays include
recommendations from pupils; these were discussed as children had seen them
in book shops and on websites.
C = Composition
GP = Grammar and Punctuation
T = Transcription
Use of brackets
to add extra
information
(GP)
Harry Potter And The Order Of The Phoenix by JK Rowling
I would like to meet Hermione Granger (Patrick asked me at
lunch today) because she’s clever (she reads lots of non-fiction
Commas used for
clarity and
structure.
Coordination
shown by the use
of but (GP)
books) and she’s always wanting to go with Harry somewhere
dangerous. I would ask her to bring Crookshanks to my house
These two pieces of
writing are linked to
texts independently
read by the pupil.
The first response is
part of an on-going
book journal
encouraging selfreflection on texts
and empathy with
characters.
and see if he and my cats played together and if so, we would
play with them, but if not then we would just talk and try to keep
them away from each other.
All sentences are
demarcated
correctly with
capital letters and
full stops. (GP)
This book is based on fifteen year olds going to a school of
witchcraft and wizardry called Hogwarts, for the fifth year. I’m
still reading it, I’m only on Chapter six out of thirty-eight and
Uses of subordinating
and coordinating
conjunctions (because,
and, so, but) support
cohesion across the text
(GP)
twelve per cent/12% into the book.
The second response
was written to be
part of a library
display to encourage
others to try books
recommended by
pupils.
I recommend this book to people who like witchcraft and
Both pieces are
organised into
paragraphs/sections
albeit a couple of
them are brief. Ideas
are generally
organised into
themes; this is
reinforced with
relevant vocabulary
choices
(guardian/tutor/maid
/
household)
Pronoun usage avoids
repetition
(she/them/it/we)
(C)
The story is full of action, adventure and magic. Kay is the main
wizardry.
I’m reading this on my kindle.
character in the story and his great grandfather’s treasure was
Apostrophes used
to show
possession (GP)
stolen and hidden. Abner Brown and the witches- the villansagainst Kay and the midnight folk are both trying to find the
stolen treasure.
Attempt to use semicolon (5/6) to
introduce a list- but
not correct (GP)
Kay’s parents are dead so he has a guardian instead but visits
every now and then. He lives in his great grandfathers house
with ; Ellen (the maid/housekeeper), the (evil) governess (the
Experimenting with
punctuation and audience
(by making asides to the
reader) (GP)
tutor for Kay), Nibbins
the household cat on the good side), Grey Maulkin (the
household cat on the witches’ side) and Blackmalkin (another
Spelling is mostly
correct – (because,
people, treasure,
taught, dangerous)
use of contracted
forms (I’m, she’s) and
the addition of suffixes
(rightfully)
(T)
Commas used
correctly in a list
(GP)
The Midnight Folk by John Masefield.
household cat on the witches side).
Kay is lonely because he doesn’t go to school, he gets taught by
his governess at home. He has no human friends.
He is also honest because if he finds the treasure he will return it
to where it rightfully belongs- the Santa Barbara priests.
© West Sussex County Council 2016
Subordination (introduced
by the subordinating
conjunction because)
provides the reason for
the writer’s opinions
(GP)
Uses a variety of
sentence types and
structures with more
than one clause (GP)
Page 6
Piece C : Diary.
Following a class English unit on the books of Roald Dahl, pupils were hot-seated
in role to become a character of their choice and questioned about a key event
they had been involved in.
Following this activity, pupils were asked to produce a short diary excerpt to
recount events and emotions. There was a class discussion about why people
keep diaries and possible key features of the text.
C = Composition
GP = Grammar and Punctuation
T = Transcription
Transition from present perfect to past
tense supports a well-managed shift to
recalling events GP
This concise diary
excerpt was written
from the perspective
of Mr Fox from
Fantastic Mr Fox.
Dear diary,
Even though today has been quite dreadful, I and my family and Badger
The first person
personal comments
provide some
elements of
dug up through the wooden floorboards of Bunce’s basement of his duck
Use of fronted
adverbials to
encourage reader
to find out why
the day was
dreadful and
might improve GP
and goose farm. I was gobsmacked by how many ducks and geese he
characterisation
towards various
Use of commas to
separate items in
a list GP
had.
events.
Cohesion has been
demonstrated through
the use of some
We took a dozen of ducks, geese, ham and babbling bacon. // When we
adverbials (even
though, when)
got back down the hole, I heard footsteps on the steps to the basement.
Some thematic
vocabulary adds detail
Using more than
one clause
developing
movement in time
and intrigue into
the basement GP
I looked up and saw Bunce’s wife. “Get down the hole!” I whispered.
to paragraphs.
Some minor edits
have been made at
Then we made a massive underground room and left all the food on the
the point of writing to
improve grammatical
table and went on the search for Bean’s farm. All the food smelled
accuracy. (I and my
family, my family and
Use of inverted
commas in direct
speech for
characterisation
and developing the
scene GP
mouthwatering including Boggis’ chickens.
I)
(C)
Cohesive devices
across sentences
(Preposition) GP
We swiftly ran across our hole until we got to the end and dug up land.
Use of
subordinating
conjunctions to
define
conclusion in
movement
(running) GP
We got to Bean’s turkey and apple farm.
Spellings are mostly correct
Through- common exception word
Use of adverb provides
Suffixes
used correctly
// indicates
neware
paragraph
emphasis to the verb GP
Handwriting maintains legibility and fluency
with letters appropriately joined. (T)
© West Sussex County Council 2016
All sentences are correctly
demarcated with capital
letters and full stops.
Apostrophes are correctly
used to show singular
possession (Bunce’s
basement).
Page 7
Piece D : Advert
This task was part of the class unit on Shackleton’s visit to Antarctica. The children
were asked to create a newspaper advertisement/poster for the recruiting of
seamen. Children were encouraged to be persuasive and broaden vocabulary
choices.
C = Composition
GP = Grammar and Punctuation
T = Transcription
This short
piece of text
demonstrates
the use of
boxed
statements to
attract
attention and
persuade the
reader
succinctly;
however there
is some loss of
control in the
statement ”
You may not
come back
alive”
Use of
pronouns for
clarity and
cohesion and
to avoid
repetition
Able Seaman Needed For The Endurance
Picture
Picture
(Endurance)
(“We need
SKILLS
You will go on a
dangerous
up is the 15th of
Bravery,
September 1796. So
navigation, good
hurry! 1913 I put in a
eyesight,
random year.
adventure.
You may not
come back alive
strength, stanima,
This expedition is
motivation and
about walking across
inventiveness. We
Antarctica
will be leaving at
FOR THE FIRST TIME
Plymouth on the
FOR THE FIRST TIME
You need to be 20
This adventure
may go down in
the history books.
You will get to see
polar animals.
31st January
1915. It will be
+ to sign up
Subordination
is evident
through the
use of because
GP
The deadline for signing
because it’s going
Mostly correct
range of
punctuation is
used
including;
capital letters,
full stops,
question
marks,
exclamation
marks,
commas for
lists and
apostrophes
for
contraction.
GP
NO stoaways
Sentence
forms are
generally
simple present
tense with
some use of
modal verb
forms (year
5/6 ) to
express
possibility.
GP
very
dangerous.
to be dangerous.
This task although brief demonstrates a range of spelling rules and patterns and shows how spelling can
be assessed from a range of writing opportunities – not always extended.
Spelling is mostly correct. Stanima and stoaways are the only errors.
Correct spelling of common exception words. E.g. history, strength
Correct spelling of words ending in –ure, -tion. E.g., adventure and expedition
Use of further suffixes –tion, -ous, -ation (e.g. navigation, motivation, dangerous)
(T)
© West Sussex County Council 2016
Page 8
Piece E : Narrative recount
As part of a class topic on Shackleton’s trip to Antarctica and survival, the class
looked at BBC online resources and Meredith Hooper’s book Ice Trap: Shackleton’s
Incredible Expedition. Children were encouraged to note down key facts during the
unit and utilise the class working wall. The children were provided with the choice of
writing a journal or a series of letters to family to recount their adventures. This
task reinforced/further developed the diary writing from earlier win the term.
C = Composition
GP = Grammar and Punctuation
T = Transcription
Cohesion is achieved through the
use of adverbials contributing to
sense of anxiety. (GP)
This concise journal
extract utilises facts
from text, online
media and the class
working wall.
These details along
with the development
of characterisation
/description
(emotions/ vocabulary
choices) help to create
a sense of impending
drama.
The opening paragraph
sets the scene and
writer’s anxiety.
Cohesion is identified
through the use of
adverbials (when/ as
we/ after what…) and
develops the sequence
of events
Vocabulary choices
further support
cohesion within
paragraphs, especially
in the section about
Apostrophes
for
contraction
matching
formality of a
diary (GP)
I could definitley not believe what Shakleton had suggested. Surely
this was an act of recklessness? Were we really going to walk and sail
800,000 paces to South Georgia to try and get assistance? When
Shackleton told us his plan, he said I was picked, so I was surprised! I
Use a variety of
sentence types
and structures
with more than
one clause to
clarify
meaning. (GP)
was picked to go on the rescue mission!
We took the strongest boat, the James Caird, our most prized
belongings and enough food for six meals in our socks and set sail.
As we worked our way though the terrific waves, the water bubbled
and splashed like a waterfall gushing over the top of us. After what
seemed like months, an unexpected hurricaine blew out in front of us
out of nowhere and swept us off course. The boat tipped back and
fourth, and we were being thrown around like a paper plane caught in
a gale.
As we eventually got to shore, we weren’t anticipating as much
damage to the James Caird. It was destroyed, like an earthquake had
Use of fronted
adverbials with
commas for clarity for
transitions in time
(GP)
Use of
subordinating
conjunctions
to refer back in
time GP
struck a house.
Use of fronted
adverbials is
being
developed in
this paragraph
although the
piece would
benefit from
further editing
to avoid
overuse. (GP)
Use a
variety of
sentence
types and
structures
with more
than one
clause,
conveying
the
significance
of the
scene (GP)
When we turned to see what obsticle Mother Nature had set up for
us, because she was against us, we saw a mischivous mountain.
As we hiked up the mountain, we needed to find a flat piece of land
out of the mountain so we could sleep.
Spelling is almost entirely correct but with some errors with adventurous
vocabulary: Shackleton, hurricane, fourth, obstacle, mischivous
The suffix –ly (eventually) –ssion (mission).
Handwriting maintains legibility and fluency with letters appropriately joined. T
© West Sussex County Council 2016
Use of co-ordinating
conjunction to provide
explanation GP
Page 9
Piece F : Narrative
The class had focussed upon Beowulf by Kevin Crossley-Holland as a literacy unit. The key focus had
been to develop the use of quality vocabulary to help develop atmosphere and characterisation. This
writing unit was an opportunity for the children to demonstrate the various writing skills they had
been developing over previous tasks. Upon completion, the children were going to read their
excerpts to others developing appropriate intonation to create suspense. The writer undertook
proofreading and editing through the process; alone and with a learn partner.
C = Composition
GP = Grammar and Punctuation
T = Transcription
The class explored
excerpts from the
text looking at how
the author used
vocabulary to
enhance mood and
description.
The children
produced their
versions of a scene
over a period of four
sessions working
with response
partners to discuss
language choices and
impact of their
writing upon a
reader.
Different sentence
forms are used to
support narrative
style (direct address
to the audience) and
demonstrate
structures with more
than one clause.
The development of
themed paragraphs
with detailed
vocabulary guides
the reader through
events.
Various forms of
adverbials are used
to express location,
time and action.
Apostrophes
used to show
possession
(GP)
Grendel’s Attack on The Great Hall
A blackening mist gathered around his legs as the vile creature, Grendel, rose
out of his cave to get revenge on the people inside of the Great Hall of Heorot
because of all of the happiness and laughter. At midnight, darkness struck.
Grendel wanted revenge! The loathsome creature could hear nothing but the
hateful sound of laughter and happiness and the occasional sound of snoring
mostly, that edged him closer to murdering everyone inside of the Great Hall.
He arrived.
With his bedrock-like fists, he smashed open the diamond-studded doors and
off.
Why tell you all of this when I haven’t told you what Grendel looked like?
Anyway, his hair was long, dark, knotty, bloodstained and dirty, as if he hadn’t
had it washed. His eyes were yellow, vast and hypnotizing. The skin of his
Punctuation
used correctly
throughout
including
apostrophe for
contractions
and commas in
a list. (GP)
kind was wrinkled, tar-like and boney. His claws were five centimeters long
and had blood pouring off of them.
Inside of his cave, Grendel saw one Geatish Sentry, screaming, Handscio he
was called, and plucked off of the ground. Grendel simply tore Handscio
apart, bolting his flesh in great handfuls, gnawing and gnashing on his bones,
was left of the poor, helpless Handscio. Not a hand on his arm, not a foot on
his legs, not even a nail on his feet or hands. Everyone gasped. The same
happened to the other fifty-nine people like an infection that was started by
Handscio. Then there was a loud snore as Grendel slept.
The following night, the same happened, Grendel took sixty more sentrys and
ripped them to pieces in his cave. Popping their eyes out like a jack-in-thePronouns used
for clarity and to
avoid repetition
(GP)
Using varied
sentence
structure; short
sentences used
for impact
alongside
complex
sentences that
give detail (GP)
snatched up sixty men in each arm and, before anyone could harm him, he ran
stripping the meat off of him, sucking his veins out like spaghetti, until nothing
Fronted
adverbials
used with the
correct use of
the comma,
to give clarity
move the plot
forward (GP)
Commas
used for
clarity and
structure
box, sucking out their veins like pot-noodles and crunching their bones like
eating a cookie. And that carried on for twelve whole years!
Spelling is mostly correct. Occasional – common exception word.
Correct spellings of homophones selected (mist/missed here/hear knot/not)
Adding suffixes beginning with vowel letters to words of more than one syllable (hypnotizing)
The suffix –ly is used correctly (simply)
Words spelt correctly using ei, eigh, ey (vein)
Endings spelt-tion used accurately (infection)
© West Sussex County Council 2016
Page 10
A range of
subordinating
conjunctions is
evident
including; as,
because, before
and until,
building
cohesion
between events
(GP)
A range of
prepositions
have been
used to aid
description
and identify
position and
time e.g.
Inside/off
of/for GP)
Piece G: Opening of a narrative
This is the final piece of work produced at the end of year 4. The pupil was
fascinated by a discussion about the centenary events of World War 1 and following
personal research and reading of War Game by Michael Foreman asked if he could
write his own narrative based about the recruitment of a soldier. The excerpt below is
the opening of the tale and shows how the learner is developing their use of
characterisation through dialogue and building up the scene through thematic
vocabulary. The pupil typed the work. No spell or grammar check was used.
C = Composition
GP = Grammar and Punctuation
T = Transcription
The opening sentence
immediately sets the
scene and develops
characterisation to
move the plot
forward.
The dialogue is
appropriately
organised with new
lines for new
speakers and the use
of capital letters
conveys the officer’s
character.
The move in time
from recruitment to
army camp is shown
by a line break/new
paragraph.
Pronouns are used to
avoid repetition
(they/ it/he/him)
Vocabulary chains
support the textual
cohesion e.g. Rifle,
bayonet, platoon
provide military
information. (C)
The Battle Of The Somme
Fronted
adverbial is
used to
introduce the
text and set the
scene.
Recruitment
As he looked towards the Recruitment Officer, Percy nervously dragged his
limbs towards the desk. The Officer shouted "NAME?" Percy didn't know
what he was talking about, so he said "Pardon? I don't know what you
mean."
Inverted
commas are
used correctly
with question
marks and
exclamation
marks (GP)
"I mean WHAT'S YOUR NAME!" His voice boomed back.
"Oh, Bill Starling." Replied Percy.
"AGE!" shouted the Officer. He thought about what to say. Percy knew the
age restriction was around 18 years old but was unsure. He was fiddling with
the pencil that was in his pocket. "I-I-I'm 18 years old." He lied.
Contractions are
used
appropriately
(GP)
"HOW TALL ARE YOU? YOU LOOK A BIT SHORT." shouted the Recruitment
Officer.” I HAVEN’T SEEN SUCH A SMALL RECRUIT!”
"I'm 6' sir" he had obviously lied but the Officer still let Percy through.
"YOU'RE THROUGH! WELL DONE PRIVATE PERCY STARLING, HERE'S THE
KING'S SHILLING! TRAINING BEGINS ON THE 30TH OF JUNE."
It was the 28th of June 1916.
Prepositions (that
was in his pocket
/ on to his rifle)
and adverbs
(obviously) add
further detail and
interest to the
plot. (GP)
Private Percy Starling was in basic training at his army camp. It was the first
Tenses are varied
and consistent with
evidence of past /
present perfect
/present/progressive
(finished
practicing/Here’s the
King’s
Shillings/haven’t
seen) and GP)
and last time he would receive any training before he went off to France and
it was nearly finished. He grabbed his rifle and his bayonet, because his
platoon was practicing how to put it on. But Percy’s bayonet just wouldn't fit
on to his rifle. It was either because he wasn't pushing hard enough, or
because his bayonet was too small. He didn't know, so he shouted in panic
There is a
predominance
of subject+verb
sentence
starts; missed
opportunities to
vary clause
structures
(GP)
"My bayonet doesn't fit on to my rifle!" But no one could hear him, because
they were all too engrossed in attaching their own bayonets. Before he knew
it , it was the end of training. They were heading to France.
Spelling is correct although word choices are less ambitious than the previous
task
Suffixes ly –evidently /nervously/obviously; tion-restriction
Through- year 3/4 common exception word Receive- year 5/6 common
exception word
© West Sussex County Council 2016
Fronted
adverbial is
used in the final
section to
conclude the
final part of the
narrative (GP)
Page 11
End of Lower Key Stage 2 – Working at the expected standard
Name:
The pupil can write for an
increasing range of purposes and
audiences:
A
B
C
D
E
F
G
NonChronological
report
Reading
Journals
Diary
Advert
Narrative
recount
Narrative
Story
Opening
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Organise writing into paragraphs
around a theme
Suit style to purpose- e.g. create /
describe characters and settings in
stories
Use a variety of sentence types and
structures with more than one clause
Use a wider range of
Co-ordinating
conjunctions
Subordinating
Use an increasing
range of cohesive
devices * within and
across sentences and
paragraphs
Adverbs
Maintain accuracy of
tense using different
verb forms
Progressive
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Prepositions
Nouns
Pronouns
Present
Present perfect
Past tense
Use fronted adverbials
Use all KS 1 punctuation accurately,
including capital letters, full stops,
question marks, exclamation marks,
commas for lists
Use mostly correctly
Inverted
commas
Apostrophes
for possession
Commas after
fronted
adverbials
Spell most year 3/4 words accurately,
including further prefixes, suffixes and
homophones, as well as most spellings
from key stage 1 *
Write in a legible joined hand
© West Sussex County Council 2016
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