13:12:15 Simplify 3 - time

13/12/15 Simplify 3 - Time
INTRO - Ephesians 5
We are continuing our Advent series on the theme of simplicity today. Two weeks ago we
looked at simplifying our spirituality, then last week on simplifying our speech and this
week - simplifying our time.
Can you answer 'yes' to any of these questions? Have you ever:
- moved from one queue to another because the one you were in wasn't moving fast
enough?
- spotted someone in the supermarket from a distance and ducked out of the way so they
don't see you?
- pressed the close door button in a lift like this?
- driven an entire journey exclusively in the overtaking lane?
- eaten lunch at your desk whilst also answering emails and talking on the phone?
- felt like God should have made an eighth day in the week so you could catch up with all
you need to do?
If so, you may suffer from 'hurry sickness' - defined as a feeling of anxiety and stress
because there isn't enough time to do all the things you need to do.
ILL: Ran into somebody and instead of asking "how are you?" I was asked "are you
keeping busy?"
The average worker in the UK gets 28 days holiday each year. This may seem generous
compared to the Americans who only get around 10 but not compared to the French who
get 47, the Germans who get 41, the Spaniards who get 46 and the Italians who get 44.
Even in the UK less than half of workers take all their holidays and on average work up to
8 weeks' worth of overtime each year.
Work related stress is a growing problem, costing employers millions of work hours each
year as employees feel undervalued, overworked, underpaid and unfulfilled.
In family life things are changing. There is a significant squeezed middle for people in their
late 50's and early 60's: they can't afford to retire so are still working, but because of
increased life expectancy often end up looking after their ageing parents. At the same time
often they look after their grandchildren in order to allow both parents (if there are two) of
their grandchildren to go to work to make ends meet and not have to pay extortionate
amounts of childcare.
With all that going on there is little time for fun, rest and recreation - the default mode is to
collapse in a heap on the sofa and vegetate for a few hours each night in front of I'm a
Celebrity in order to get up the next day and do it all over again. Regular church
attendance is now classed as only twice a month as people are so busy.
In the midst of all this Paul writes in Ephesians 5:15-16 says "Be very careful, then, how
you live - not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the
days are evil."
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Other translations of that verse say to "redeem the time". Buy back your time from it's
slavery and have freedom in how you use it. We have been given a finite amount of time
and God calls us as His people to steward it well.
Today I want to give us a tool for practically doing that. Slightly different from usual
sermon.
I want to show you this diagram here that illustrates the problem of hurry sickness and why
we all need to address it. Along the bottom it shows the level of pressure we can be under
at any given point. Up the side it shows our ability to function at that level.
Five stages:
1. Boredom: low pressure, low performance. Need some pressure.
2. Comfort: at this level we have a sustainable level of pressure and we do good work.
Keep going - this is the sweet spot.
3. Stretch: in this zone we are performing well but now at an unsustainable level. Often
feels good here because the adrenaline is flowing. But you can't live there. Need an exit
strategy.
4. Strain: at this point things are beginning to creak and we start to feel like things are
getting out of control. Need to stop NOW.
5. Burnout: a crash. Need help and time.
As we get into this today let me ask you - where are you right now? Pause and ask God
where you are on this graph. If you are taking notes write it down. Me, I've been going
solid since August without a break, so I am in stretch and if I don't stop at Christmas I am
going to go somewhere I don't want to go. Take note and we'll come back to it later.
How do we simplify our time? As I said I want to give you a tool, a process for you to take
away and work through prayerfully so you can live in that place of productivity for God's
glory. Lot's of info so I'll put the full notes online.
1. Define your God-given priorities
We have been created with purpose for a purpose - the first task is to find out what that is.
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Romans 12:1-2 "Offer your body as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God - this is
your true and proper worship"
Our first priority is worship - responding to God. We are to be living sacrifices, laying down
our lives for others as worship to God.
Ephesians 2:10 "We were created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared
in advance for us to do"
There are good works of service to others that God has made us to do: parenting your
children, cooking dinner, your work, sharing Jesus with someone - all kinds of things.
What are the particular 'good works' God has given you, where you are, right now?
Really helpful to think of this in terms of roles. We have all been given a certain sphere of
responsibility that is ours to manage and care for. These may change over time in different
periods of life, so we need to ask 'right now'.
What are the most important roles that you have? For most of us we would want to narrow
this down to four things, at very most five.
So mine are (just giving you an example):
(a) Human being. God has called me to belong to him through faith in Christ. That's my
most important role. What that means is I need to look after my spiritual health, my
physical health, mental health and emotional health. No one else will do this for me - it is
my responsibility.
(b) Husband to Janine. My primary relationship is with my wife. If you are married your
primary relationship on this earth is with your spouse. If you aren't married it will be some
other thing - maybe you feel being a friend is next, or your work could even be next, etc.
(c) Dad to my kids. More important than any role or job, at the minute my children are
young and need lots of care, so that's my God given priority right now.
(d) Pastor of this church. Church leader - what God has called me to be.
(e) Wider family, friends, community, etc
The first step in this process is to identify and define your 4/5 roles. Write them down. How
do we do this?
• Gifts: SHAPE. Spiritual gifts/heart/abilities/personality/experience
• Capacity
It might take some thought and some time to whittle them down to max 5. Four is even
better than five. Write them down!
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2. Design the shape of your life
That may be an unusual idea - surely that's not up to me to design my life is it? Might be a
bit uncomfortable with that idea, but listen to Proverbs 14:8 "The wisdom of the prudent is
to give thought to their ways...." It is wisdom to think about your life. It is not wise to just
drift along hoping it will all end up for the best.
ILL: Cheap electronics from eBay. Reverse engineering your life. Relationships, career,
relationship with God, physical health
Again, write it down. And dream big! We are so trained to think small! It won't happen just
because you wrote it down, but it's a start. VISION.
That's all this is about. Prayerfully considering our ways before God. "How do you see my
life?"
Two myths: (1) I have absolute control over my life (2) I have no control over my life. There
are always choices.
This step is about taking your roles and putting them into your calendar and getting
boundaries in the right places.
For me (again an example):
(a) Human being - I am refreshed by withdrawing, being alone or just being with a few
people. So I have to make sure that time gets put in my week, every week. If I go three or
four nights out in a row I just begin to hate life! Knowing how you work, taking stock of
energy levels. What refreshes you. Going to bed on time. Eating well. Exercising. Turning
my phone off.
(b) Husband - There are daily, weekly, monthly, annual rhythms in our marriage. So every
day we try to have a 15 minute conversation, most Saturday nights we cook a meal and
spend it together, monthly we try to go out (lunch/dinner/coffee). Annually we get a
weekend or a couple of overnighters away. We need it to avoid strain.
(c) Father - I limit nights out each week to three. One of those is Community Group. I am
home for dinner most nights to see the kids. I put them to bed when I'm home. I try to be
present when I am home. Saturday mornings the aim is one of the kids for coffee,
McDonald's etc.
(d) Pastor - Although my fourth priority, it is most of my immediate time, but I plan it. Time
for planning (meetings), people, prep and prayer. But because of other priorities the church
won't get 60 hours of my week!
3. Discover how to say no nicely
Romans 15:20 Paul talks about his priorities: "It has always been my ambition to preach
the gospel where Christ was not known" then verse 23 "Now that there is no more place
for me to work in these regions...I plan to go to Spain"
He was able to say NO because he had a strong YES. Once you have a clear idea of the
roles God has given you, you can say no to things with confidence.
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Need to be kind about how we communicate our 'no'. We should explain why to the other
person rather than being blunt.
WARNING: we are called to be servants. If the dishes need done it's not 'not my gifting'
'not my calling'.
4. Do it, by dying daily
This is the most difficult step and the one that separates this from a self help article you
might read on the internet.
Romans 6:11-12 "Count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus. Therefore
do not let sin reign in your bodies so that you obey it's evil desires."
Don't let sin linger
The ultimate reason we have hurry sickness is not to do with having a disorganised
schedule. The ultimate reason we find it hard to say no is because of sin. The ultimate
difficulty lies in our hearts. So if we want to walk in freedom with our time we need to put
some things to death by the Spirit's help, some things we may need to repent of and turn
away from.
[Explain each]
•
•
•
•
•
•
Perfectionism - fear of losing control
People pleasing - fear of rejection/upsetting people
Activism - fear of space
Saviour complex - fear of limitations
Striving - fear of being thought irresponsible
Good boy/girl syndrome - fear of vulnerability and risk
Notice these are all rooted in fear - but God's perfect love casts out fear. These are
strategies of self reliance because we believe the myths of control; that either we can
control everything or we can control nothing.
Which one of these things contributes most to your hurry sickness?
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Where are you on the graph? What series of choices helped you get there?
Circumstances may have been pressing you, but did you respond out of fear?
CONCLUDING
• Schedule out of control? No sense of purpose? Leave today, get a notebook and carve
out some time to work through these steps. Maybe get someone to help you process it.
Make some changes and put some things in place. A good time to do it at the end of the
year. Say no to some things.
• What habits of the heart do you need to confess before God? You can go and get prayer
this morning. You can get a coffee with someone to process them together
• Not a Christian here today? All we have talked about assumes you were born for
meaning and purpose. The only anchor for this is found when we come into a right
relationship with God and with others. Trusting in Jesus is the way we can find purpose surrender.
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