Being Concise / Reducing Repetition
Grammar Skill Presentation
11/19
Shine
Reducing Repetition
Reducing Repetition
Definition of Repetition An instance of using a word, phrase, or clause more than once in a short passage.
Pros & Cons
Needless or unintentional repetition (a tautology or pleonasm) is a kind of clutter that may distract or bore a reader.
Used deliberately, repetition can be an effective rhetorical strategy for achieving emphasis.
"To exist is to change, to change is to mature, to mature is to go on creating oneself endlessly."
‐Henri Bergson
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Can_you_list_10_examples_of_repetition
http://grammar.about.com/od/rs/a/repetitionterm.htm
Reducing Repetition
Repetition
Words & Phrases
Sentence Structures
Ideas or Arguments
Reducing Repetition
Words & Phrases
EX. Marji tried to commit suicide but Marji did not success.
Prescription
> Re‐phrase the concept in your own words.
> Use a proper pronoun to replace original word.
> Use a dictionary – either a book, or the one in your word‐processor.
Marji tried to commit suicide but Marji failed to do so.
Marji tried to commit suicide but she did not success.
Marji attempted suicide but she did not make it.
http://www.mantex.co.uk/2009/08/24/writing‐essays‐repetition/
Reducing Repetition
Sentence Structures
EX. I like to eat vegetables. Tom likes to eat vegetables too.
Prescription
> Use conjunction to reorganize the sentences.
> Use proper adverbs and rearrange the sentence construction.
> Change the order of clauses to join sentences.
Tom and I both like to eat vegetables.
I like to eat vegetables, and so does Tom.
Tom likes to eat vegetables, which is also what I like to eat.
Reducing Repetition
Ideas or Arguments
EX. Smoking is bad for your health.
Smoking is subject to heart diseases.
Smoking is easy to get older.
Prescription
Generate more ideas at the planning stage. A well‐constructed plan will help you to avoid duplicating your arguments.
EX. Smoking is bad for your health.
Smoking wastes your money.
Smoking is bad for your family and surrounding people.
Reducing Repetition
International Business
Health
Economy
Unnecessary
expense
Poor
metabolism
Heart Diseases
Tax
Aging
Smoking
Air Pollution
Environment
Ethics
Fire accident
Education
Family & Children
Public Places
Fire accident
Being Concise
Being Concise
Definition of Concise “A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences, for the same reason that a drawing should have no unnecessary lines and a machine no unnecessary parts."
‐William Strunk
Concise
Words & Phrases
Sentence Structures
Ideas or Arguments
Being Concise
Words & Phrases
1. Replace Vague Words: Replace vague words with more powerful and specific words.
Wordy: Suzie believed but could not confirm that Billy had feelings of affection for her.
Revised: Suzie assumed that Billy adored her.
2. Reduce Phrases : Likewise, try to reduce phrases to single words:
Wordy: The clown at the end of the line tried to sweep up the spotlight.
Revised: The last clown tried to sweep up the spotlight.
3. Don't Overwork Modifiers : Do not overwork very, really, totally, and other modifiers that add little or nothing to the meaning of a sentence.
Wordy: By the time she got home, Merdine was very tired.
Revised: By the time she got home, Merdine was exhausted.
http://grammar.about.com/od/words/tp/clutter_tips.htm
Being Concise
Sentence Structures
1. Reduce Long Clauses: When editing, try to reduce long clauses to shorter phrases:
Wordy: The clown who was in the center ring was riding a tricycle.
Revised: The clown in the center ring was riding a tricycle.
2. Avoid Empty Openers: Avoid There is, There are, and There were as sentence openers when There adds nothing to the meaning of a sentence:
Wordy: There is a prize in every box of Quacko cereal.
Revised: A prize is in every box of Quacko cereal.
3. Question Every Word in a sentence: Check every word to make sure that it is providing something important and unique to a sentence.
Wordy: The teacher showed some of the various ways for cutting words from my essay that I written for class.
Revised: The teacher showed methods for cutting words from my essay.
http://grammar.about.com/od/words/tp/clutter_tips.htm
Being Concise
Ideas or Arguments
Sandwich Structure: As a rule, begin each paragraph with a topic sentence, supporting ideas and examples , and conclusion in conformity with the beginning.
Each paragraph only has one main idea.
Topic sentence
Supporting ideas and Examples Conclusion
http://grammar.about.com/od/words/tp/clutter_tips.htm
Being Concise
International Business
Health
Economy
Unnecessary
expense
Poor
metabolism
Heart Diseases
Tax
Aging
Smoking
Air Pollution
Environment
Ethics
Fire accident
Education
Family & Children
Public Places
Fire accident