Self Talk

STOP THE NEGATIVE SELF TALK
Negative self-talk is often like a downward spiral on a sled upon a bed of ice with no brake. Negative
self-talk usually starts with a trigger, i.e. one little comment from a friend, a snafu of a business deal,
or perhaps getting on a scale to find you gained a pound. Damn you Nutella!
Whatever the trigger, it's usually followed by a structured discussion in your head that perpetuates
the initial negative thought. It can grow into a huge ugly monster if unstopped. The talk inside your
head begins softly, and then grows in frequency, intensity and volume with more fake facts, past
mishaps, and then arrives with a conclusion similar to “that's it, I will never do anything right, I am a
loser!” Once you create that label, whether it's new or reinforced, it holds weight in your mind and
spirit. Everything you do with this label freshly tattooed in your brain and heart will reinforce it. It
may take hours, or even days, to recover and bounce back to a healthy state of mind.
We are going to re-wire your brain so that you realize the trigger and can stop the decline into
negativity before it latches on and gains strength. This will take you at least 6 weeks to work on and
perfect. Please be patient and look back at this chapter when you feel a need to freshen up on the
lesson. The goal is to never allow negativity to take over your mind and to always hold yourself in a
positive light; not inflated, but positive and filled with self-love.
DEFINE YOUR SELF-TALK
This lesson will start to help you change the way you speak to yourself internally, mirroring the way
you speak with the reality of the life you desire. The way we speak to ourselves, our internal
dialogue, sets the course for the future we create. Your internal conversation illustrates itself in life.
What is 1 negative thought that you have had on an on-going basis over the last 12 months?
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What are some other negative thoughts you have about yourself that you think about often?
[Limit to 3 for this exercise]
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Let's begin with your first noted negative thought above. Within 3 seconds [the 3 second rule still
applies like last week]: note a typical negative thought conversation you have on a regular basis.
Please also add how the internal conversation grows in your head:
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What is the trigger of this negative thought? Is it a situation or comment from someone? What is
the center of this thought process? [If you don't know the answer, pretend that you did know the
answer. What is your gut telling you? Only you will know this answer and it's crucial to get it on the
paper]
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Do the same for other negative talks you have often [you may need to use the back of this
paper]
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ACTION TIME:
Now that you have defined the negative label you have given yourself, the internal conversation
that takes place to give you false evidence of this label, and the trigger of the conversation, what are
the words that counter the falseness of the self-imposed label? What are some truths based on the
facts of your life, and based on reality, that discredit the fallacy mentioned above? Do all three and
you will need extra paper.
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st
Take the 1 internal conversation and re-write the story here, yes right here! Re-write what your
new internal conversation will be the next time you receive a trigger and the negative self-talk
begins:
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Now do the same with the following 2 internal conversations you have and re-write the way you will
tell yourself the story here…and now!
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How will you feel after acting on the above items? In 6 weeks you will have achieved the removal of
these past negative conversations and myths that have previously defined who you are. How will
you feel? What will you accomplish?
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RECAP:
1. Think of 3 self-talk examples that are rooted in your personal beliefs.
2. What does the conversation look like from start to finish? Note how it grows in intensity.
3. Take each negative self-talk and re-write the story positively based on your greatness. Don't
allow the negative talk to peep in.
4. Re-read your new found positive story.
5. Own your new twist on past thoughts. This is your new story of truth : a wonderful YOU!
6. These are the steps to take in the future when a negative self-talk series begins.
RESOURCES
http://www.inc.com/welcome.html?destination=http://www.inc.com/jeff-haden/the-one-crucial-traitall-incredibly-successful-people-possess.html?cid=sf01002
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/04/06/negative-self-talk-think-positive_n_3009832.html
http://www.webmd.com/balance/express-yourself-13/negative-self-talk
NOW MAKE YOUR 6 WEEK PLAN:
*You can do this!! This is a critical part of your future, prosperous life and work! Keep this handy
and refer to it as often as possible and needed. You tell the stories you want to hear, and from
here forward, you are telling yourself only the good stories. So good-bye to the myths and hello
to your rockin' self!
You are amazing!!
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