SMART REVISION
GCSE English & English Language
Unit 1: Understanding and Producing
Non-fiction Texts
Foundation Tier
Unit 1
Student Revision Booklet
Unit 1 Exam
2nd June 2015 a.m.
(2 hours 15 min)
1
Contents
Overview of Unit 1 Examination
p3
Section A: Reading
General reading strategies
p4-5
Q1 (a): Select and retrieve & Q1 (b): Read and understand (Source 1) p 6 - 14
Q2: Read and understand (Source 2)
p 15 - 23
Q3: Language features (Source 3)
p 24 - 33
Q4: Comparison of presentational devices
p 34 - 42
Section B: Writing
Overview of writing skills
p 44 - 49
Q5: Shorter Writing task - Writing to explain, describe
p 50 - 61
Q6: Longer Writing Task - Writing to persuade, argue
p 62 - 72
Tricky Spellings and key Words
p 73 - 78
Top Tips: The Final Countdown
p 79 - 80
Examiner’s comments and answers
p 81 - 86
Recommended Websites
p 87
How to Use the Revision Guide
 This guide has been written to help you to develop and improve your examination skills.
 It has been divided into two main sections: Section A (Reading) and Section B (Writing).
 These sections are then broken down into each question containing top tips, example
questions and sample answers to help you to improve your own skills needed in the
exam.
 While there is a lot of information included in the booklet, the aim is for it to be a
practical revision aid.
 In a notebook, exercise book or folder, read the sections and have a go at planning and
answering the questions. Try to keep all your work in one place.
2
Unit 1: Understanding & producing non-fiction texts
Overview
External Exam
60% of the total GCSE marks
2 hours 15 minutes
Section A: Reading
30% of the total GCSE marks
1 hour 15 minutes (recommended)
Section B: Writing
30% of the total GCSE marks
1 hour (recommended)
80 marks
40 marks
40 marks
Section A: Reading
30% GCSE (40 marks)




You should spend 1 hour 15 minutes on this section.
Answer five compulsory questions based on three reading sources.
Read all the questions carefully.
Read the texts provided, annotating and underlining key ideas as you read.
+
Section B: Writing
30% GCSE (40 marks)




You should spend 1 hour on this section.
Answer both questions.
One shorter task: Writing to inform, explain or describe (16 marks – 25 minutes);
One longer task: Writing to argue or persuade (24 marks – 35 minutes)
Assessment Objectives
AO3 Studying Written Language
i.
Read and understand texts, selecting material appropriate to purpose, collating from
different sources and making comparisons and cross references as appropriate.
ii. Develop and sustain interpretations of writers’ ideas and perspectives.
iii. Explain and evaluate how writers use linguistic, grammatical, structural and
presentational features to achieve effects and engage and influence the reader.
AO4 Writing
i.
Write to communicate clearly, effectively and imaginatively, using and adapting forms
and selecting vocabulary appropriate to task and purpose in ways that engage the
reader.
ii. Organise information and ideas into structured and sequenced sentences, paragraphs
and whole texts, using a variety of linguistic and structural features to support cohesion
and overall coherence.
iii. Use a range of sentence structures for clarity, purpose and effect, with accurate
punctuation and spelling.
3
Section A: Reading
4
Section A: Reading
30% GCSE (40 marks)




You should spend 1 hour 15 minutes on this section.
Answer four compulsory questions based on three reading sources.
Read all the questions carefully.
Read the texts provided; annotating and underlining key ideas as you read.
Suggested Timings
Read the sources and questions - 10 minutes
Q1 (a) – 5 minutes (4 marks)
Q1 (b) – 5 minutes (4 marks)
Q2 – 10 minutes (8 marks)
Q3 – 20 minutes (12 marks)
Q4 – 20 minutes (12 marks)
Check answers - 5 minutes
Reading Strategies
Reading Strategies are ways in which you can understand even more
about a text by:
Predicting
You make informed guesses about the text
Skimming
You read quickly through the sentences getting a
gist of the understanding of the text
Scanning
Your eyes dart around a text searching for a
specific word/phrase/number
Close reading
You pay close attention to the sentences, taking
time to understand the meaning
Questioning
You ask questions about a text to clarify your ideas
Reading backwards and forwards
When you have to read back in a text or read
forward in order to make connections or clarify your
ideas
Inferring
When someone makes a point that isn’t obvious
and you have to read ‘between the lines’ to find the
meaning
5
Question 1(a):
Select and Retrieve
Question 1 (b):
Read and
understand
6
Question 1 (a) - Select and retrieve from Source 1.
1 (a) List four things you learn/understand…. (4 marks)
Band 3
(4 marks)
Give one mark to each of the following possible answers (or other
sensible and valid selections of information from the article) up to
a maximum of 4.
Top tips:
This is a very straight forward question and should help you to ease yourself into the
exam but ……..
KEEP CALM AND READ THE QUESTION
REMEMBER:

Don’t write down anything from the article – it will be asking you what we
learned about something specific.

Don’t over complicate it.

It is not asking for your opinion or to comment on the points you are making.

Use a list to make it clear to the examiner – perhaps using a format such as:
We learn:
–
–
Key reading strategies for this question
Scanning
Skimming
Close
reading
Your turn …

On the following page is the Source and question which appeared in the Unit 1
exam from June 2014. (You may well have completed this paper already)

Read Source 1, ‘Brother and sister swim 14 hours for their lives after fishing boat
sinks’ and have a go at answering the question.

Remember the top tips from above.

Once you have had a go, turn to p82 to see what the examiners wanted to read.
7
Question 1 (a) Past Question
The following source and question have been taken from the June 2014 Unit 1
examination.
Read Source 1, the online article ‘Brother and sister swim 14 hours for their lives after fishing
boat sinks’ and answer the questions below:
1 (a) List four things you learn about Dan and Kate Suski from the article
(4 marks)
8
Question 1(b) - Read and understand Source 1.
1 (b) Select information, quote, comment and make inferences. (4 marks)

Typical questions start with ‘What,’ ‘How,’ etc.
Band 3
(4 marks)




clear evidence that the text is understood
clear engagement with the text and makes inferences
offers relevant and appropriate quotation
makes developed references
Top tips:

The Principal Examiner recommends that you use the following structure to
answer this question:
Statement + Quotation + Inference (very similar to PEE or PEA)
For example:
statement ‘I learn that…’
+ supporting quotation ‘the text states’
+ inference (what is being hinted at) ‘this suggests’
Don’t:
•
•
•
•
•
•
Paraphrase
Copy out the text
Use quotations randomly
Write about language features
Write about themselves
Don’t go off the point
Do:
•
•
•
•
Use your own words
Use quotations properly
Making inferences (read between the lines)
Use the structure Point, Support, Infer (or PEA, PEA)
Question 1(b) Past Question

Now read the following question and sample answer for Q1(b) based on the
article ‘Brother and sister swim 14 hours for their lives after fishing boat
sinks’ on page 8 of the Revision Guide.

The examiner’s comments have been included.

Read these and then look at the mark scheme on the following page and
decide what mark you would have given the answer.

The answer is at the back of the revision booklet on p82.
9
1 (b) What do you understand about the difficulties the Suskis faced when their boat sank?
Remember to:
 show your understanding by using your own words
 support your ideas with the text.
(4 marks)
They spoke about the thing that might kill them during the long swim ‘considered
the possible ways we might die. Would we drown? Be eaten by a shark?
Hyperthermia?’ This could imply that they are coming to terms with the danger of
the situation and the fact that they might not both make it home alive. The text
also talks about the condition of the water in the phrase ‘at least eight miles from
the shore and being tossed by tall waves’. This shows just how difficult it would
have been to actually swim against the waves. This also implies that it would
have been easy to get lost by the distance between them and the shore or be
dragged further out to sea by the size and strength of the waves.
Remember:
Statement
Quotation
Infer
10
Mark Scheme
11
Here’s some for you to try …
Read Source 1, the online article ‘Koala mittens needed to help bushfire victims with burnt paws’ and
answer the questions below:
1 (a) List four things you learn about the koalas from the article.
(4 marks)
(b) What do you understand about the difficulties the koalas face in the aftermath of the bushfires?
Remember to:
 show your understanding by using your own words
 support your ideas with the text.
(4 marks)
Koala mittens needed to help bushfire victims with burnt paws
Animal welfare group provides sewing pattern for people to knit their own as it braces for flood of animals
injured in recent bushfires in Australia
Thursday 8 January 2015
Jeremy the koala receives treatment for burnt paws. Photograph: Amwrro.org.au
The International Fund for Animal Welfare (IFAW) is appealing for help for koalas injured in the South Australian and Victorian bushfires
– in the form of mittens.
Slow-moving koalas have been the sad victims of bushfires in South Australia, Victoria and New South Wales over the past week.
“We expect koalas may come into the care of wildlife groups as the fire grounds are opened up to rescuers searching for injured
animals,” the IFAW said. “Already koalas have come into care in Victoria and in South Australia firefighters and members of the public
are reported to have helped displaced and exhausted koalas by providing water and a respite from the heat.”
In NSW, most of an area of prime koala habitat (home to 35 of the area’s approximately 143 animals) was destroyed by fire at Pottsville
on the Tweed Coast. Four koalas were reported rescued from this area, IFAW said.
The International Fund for Animal Welfare says donating cotton mittens to help protect burnt koala paws is one way people have help in
the aftermath of bushfires in Australia.Photograph: John Paolini/International Fund for Animal Welfare
The organisation is asking people to make and donate simple cotton mittens to help injured
“Many koalas perish in bushfires, while the lucky ones that survive are often badly injured and need intensive treatment by vets and
dedicated wildlife carers,” IFAW said. “Injured koalas typically come into care with severe burns, especially on their paws, caused by
contact with burning trees or from fleeing across fire grounds.
“These injuries need treatment with burns cream and paws need to be protected with special cotton mittens.”
Josey Sharrad, an IFAW native wildlife campaigner, said a plentiful supply of these mittens was needed throughout the bushfire
season.
“Just like any burns victim, koalas’ dressings need changing daily, meaning a constant supply of mittens is needed by wildlife carers.
Some burned koalas can take up to a year to fully recover” she said.
Sharrad appealed to people to use clean, 100% cotton to create mittens.
“Maybe you have some old cotton sheets or tea towels – just check that the material is 100% cotton,” Sharrad said. “These mittens are
simple to make even if you’ve never sewn before.
12
Another …
Read Source 1, the ‘Twins forced to cancel trek after injury’ and answer the questions below:
1 (a) List four things you learn about Hugo and Ross Turner from the article.
(b) What do you understand about why the twins were forced to abandon the expedition?
(4 marks)
(4 marks)
Twins forced to cancel trek after injury
A dramatic helicopter rescue in the eye of a severe Arctic storm signalled the end to the hopes
and dreams of the Turner Twins’ polar expedition last night.
Hugo and Ross Turner, 25, from Christow in Devon, were crossing the Greenland ice cap to raise money for spinal research.
In addition to fundraising the Department of Twin Research at King's College London was using the expedition to study how
modern clothes, food and equipment protect the body.Hugo will have modern kit, equipment and food, while Ross will be kitted
out with clothes similar to those worn by Sir Ernest Shakleton 100 years ago. Ross will also have an early 20th Century polar
expedition diet.
A doctor treating Hugo Turner’s leg injury and back problems at the remote isolated DYE 2 former American ‘cold war’ radar
station in the middle of the polar ice cap had already confirmed it was impossible for him to continue. Hugo, who broke his neck
eight years ago was thought to be in peak fitness before the trek, but had been in excruciating pain for days.
The twins, with George Bullard their polar expert guide, spent an agonising 48 hours considering their options and whether just
two of them would go on with the trek in the light of worsening weather and minus 30 degrees blizzard conditions. The longer
they waited with Hugo the more they were depleting vital food rations too.
But finally a warning from the American military not to carry on with the expedition put paid to their dreams. Two other polar
adventurers had just been rescued from further ahead, one had lost both legs and the other had serious face injuries because of
extreme frostbite. The team reluctantly made the decision to call off the trek.
Abandoning the expedition left the twins feeling crushed and dejected after 18 months of planning and preparation for the
assault on the polar ice cap.
Close to tears after the evacuation, Hugo said: “We agonised over the decision to cut the expedition short. I clearly could not
walk so there was no option for me and I know the others wanted to go on but it just was not safe. There was little option but to
get out.”
“I have never been in such an extreme environment. Every decision you make is a life and death one. There is no room for error
and when things go wrong they go wrong very quickly.”
Ross added: “I just feel hollow and empty. It is devastating after all our work and all the support everyone has given us. I don’t
regret going. I have seen some of the most beautiful things I have ever seen up here. But it is also the most terrifying place any
of us has ever been to.”
“We want to pay tribute to the twins and to their polar guide, George, for their heroic effort on behalf of Spinal Research,” said
Jerry Doyle, Head of Communications at the charity. “It is heart-breaking for Hugo that he was hit by injury but after the warning
from the military and local experts not to continue it was best to cut the expedition short.”
The team are now safely back in Kangerlassauq in western Greenland and are sorting their cargo transport arrangements and
negotiating flights out to Copenhagen and then home to the UK. They are expected to undertake a series of talks and
engagements on returning.
13
And another …
Read Source 1, the online article ‘Daredevil Nik Wallenda completes two tightrope walks between Chicago
skyscrapers – including one with a blindfold’ and answer the following questions:
1 (a) List four things you learn about Nik Wallenda from the article.
(b) What do you understand about the dangers involved in the record attempt?
(4 marks)
(4 marks)
Daredevil Nik Wallenda completes two tightrope walks between Chicago
skyscrapers — including one with blindfold
BY NEW YORK DAILY NEWS, November 2, 2014
The 35-year-old high-wire artist — did two 600-foot-high walks over the Windy City on Sunday. Wallenda
set world records for the highest blindfolded tightrope walk ever negotiating the steepest incline for a
tightrope walk between two buildings.
It was such a death-defying thrill, tightrope-walking daredevil Nik Wallenda did it twice.
The 35-year-old great-grandson of Karl Wallenda, of the famous Flying Wallendas circus family, successfully walked on a wire Sunday
night between two Chicago skyscrapers before doing it again — blindfolded.
“Praise God, here I am,” Wallenda said after accomplishing the feat.
Without a net or harness, he walked a tightrope between the Marina City west tower to the top of the Leo Burnett Building on the other
side of the frigid Chicago River in 6 minutes and 51 seconds. The 19-degree slant of his tightrope upped the risk even more.
‘You guys watching think I’m crazy, but this is what I’m made for,” the married father of three said as he took his first steps on the wire.
As an estimated crowd of 50,000 spectators cheered more than 600 feet below, Wallenda said, “I love Chicago and Chicago definitely
loves me. What an amazing roar.”
The event was broadcast on The Discovery Channel — with a 10-second delay in case Wallenda fell from the ¾-inch-thick steel wire
stretched over two city blocks.
Wallenda set world records for the highest blindfolded tightrope walk ever, and negotiating the steepest incline for a tightrope walk
between two buildings.
He said the wind howling at the top of the 65-story Marina City tower was “extremely intimidating.”
After completing the first walk, he took an elevator down to the street and returned to the top of the west Marina City tower and walked
a cable blindfolded to the east Marina City tower.
Wallenda’s previous televised tightrope walks — over the brink of Niagara Falls in 2012 and across the Little Colorado River Gorge in
2013 — drew about 13 million viewers each.
The Marina City twin towers are iconic landmarks in Chicago that have appeared in Hollywood films, including “The Hunter,” in which
Steve McQueen chased a fugitive around the west tower’s corkscrew parking ramp. The skyscrapers also graced the cover of Wilco’s
2002 album “Yankee Hotel Foxtrot.”
Journalists covering Sunday’s event signed waivers relinquishing their right to claim emotional distress if they witnessed a catastrophe.
A year before Wallenda was born, his great-grandfather fell to his death during a tightrope stunt in Puerto Rico. He was 73.
“Life is on the wire,” Karl Wallenda once said. “Everything else is just waiting.”
14
Question 2:
Read and
understand
15
Question 2 - Read and understand Source 2.
Q2. Select information, quote, comment and make inferences. (8 marks)
Band 3
(6-8 marks)




clear evidence that the text is understood
clear engagement with the text and makes inferences
offers relevant and appropriate quotation
makes developed references
Top tips:

This question is very similar to 1(b) so you need to use the same skills:
statement + quotation + inference

You must show that you can understand and infer.
Can you read between the lines?
What is the implied meaning in the following?
1. “Of course I don’t mind if you sit and do absolutely nothing during my lesson.”
2. “The Minister said that ‘he had done nothing at all wrong’ by claiming
£175,000 on his expenses for a new lawnmower.”
3. Her boyfriend said, “Are you really going out dressed like that?”
4. I know Santa is coming tonight, but you aren't getting anything for Christmas."
5. 'I'm glad it's Saturday tomorrow,' she thought, staggering under the weight of
her school bag.
6. The boss said, “You will be lucky if you can get him to work for you,” when
asked to provide a reference for an old employee.
7. With a smile on her face, Laura told her mum that school had been cancelled
because of snow.
8. Giving a good look around first, Henry cautiously lit his cigarette.
Remember:

Don’t just find the key reasons and copy them out, use them as supporting
quotations.

Find the focus of the question e.g. the lifeboat, then find the relevant material to
go with it. Then you can show your understanding using support and inference.

Don’t just copy out the text
16
Question 2 Past Question
Read Source 2 and the question from the June 2014 examination.
Now read Source 2, ‘To The Lifeboats’, an extract from a book for children about the famous ship
the Titanic which sank on its maiden voyage in 1912.
2. What do you understand about the final moments before the sinking of the Titanic from the text?
Remember to:
 show your understanding by explaining in your own words
 support your ideas with the text.
(8 marks)
17
Now read the sample answer and the examiner’s comments:
Now read Source 2, ‘To The Lifeboats’, an extract from a book for children about the famous ship
the Titanic which sank on its maiden voyage in 1912.
2. What do you understand about the final moments before the sinking of the Titanic from the text?
Remember to:
 show your understanding by explaining in your own words
 support your ideas with the text.
(8 marks)
Candidate 1
statement
+
quotation
simple
reference
In the final moments before the Titanic sank there was fear, panic and confusen. Women
and children were loaded onto the lifeboats first this was a big problem as not many women
statement
+
wanted to leave their husbands behind ‘some lifeboats were lowered half empty’ this shows
quotation
hardly any women were prepared to leave there husbands. There hadn’t been any lifeboat
drill so not many people knew what to do when it became clear that the boat was sinking all
the third class passengers tried rushing to get a place on the lifeboats but when they finally
reached the top the lifeboats had gone. ‘There weren’t enough boats to take half the people
and the chances of the other half in that icy cold water were absolutely nil.’ Passengers knew
they wouldn’t survive if they didn’t make it so there lives were at risk and they were
statement
panicking, screaming and running trying to save their lives.
+
quotation
inference
Candidate 2
I understand that the final moments before Titanic sank were frightening. ‘As it became clear
the Titanic was really sinking, there was a scramble for places in the lifeboats.’ This quote
shows that although people were not aware of the severity of the situation at first, once it
became clear people were worried for their lifes. This is shown in the word ‘scramble’ which
is put there to show the fear of the passengers and how it was displayed in their actions.
quotation
supports
inference
statement
+
quotation
I also understand that the Titanic was not expected to sink. ‘There had been no lifeboat drill,
so many of the passengers and crew didn’t know what to do.’ The fact that nobody really
knew what to do is a clear indication that no preparation was put in place for a situation like
this, as it was not anticipated that a ship like the Titanic would sink. This would of conveyed a
feeling of confusion throughout the ship in the passengers and the crew.
I understand that this was a distressing time for the families. ‘… with women saying goodbye to the men, who stood back.’ This quote shows that because women and children were
priority. Some families were parted to never be reunited again. This would have been an
exceptionally emotional time for the passengers. This is shown in the word ‘goodbye’ as it
really shows the severity of the situation and shows that partners knew they may never see
one another ever again.
Using the mark scheme:





Read the sample answers above.
Look at the mark scheme for this question on the following page.
Which one is better?
What band/mark would you give to these candidates? Why?
Once you have made up your mind, turn to p82 for the answers.
18
statement
+
quotation
Inference
x1
statement
Inference
x3
Checkpoint:
When is an inference not an inference?
Consider these examples:
Candidate A:
From the text we learn that Amy liked performing, ‘Just about the only thing she
seemed to enjoy about school was performance.’ This suggests to us that in school
Amy really enjoyed performance and it was the only thing she really liked.
 What problems can you identify with this response?
 Although this candidate is using the SQI method, they are paraphrasing the
quotation in both the statement and the inference. This perhaps only shows a
simple engagement with the text.
Candidate B:
•
One thing we learn about Amy’s schooldays is that she loved singing and being
in the school shows, ‘Just about the only thing she seemed to enjoy about
school was performance’. This tells us that Amy was only really interested in
the subject she enjoyed and was good at - performing arts.



What strengths can you identify with this response?
In this example, we can see a clear statement, supported by a quotation.
The inference is not a paraphrase of either the statement or quotation. It shows
something has been deduced by the candidate, thereby demonstrating their
understanding of the text.
19
Mark Scheme
20
Your Turn …
Now read Source 2, an extract from James Cracknell’s autobiography ‘Touching Disrtance’ which
describes his attempt to cross America under his own steam which ended when he was knocked off
his bike.
2. Explain what you learn about Cracknell’s feelings about his family and his working life..
Remember to:

show your understanding by explaining in your own words

support your ideas using the text.
(8 marks)
Touching Distance
By Beverley and James Cracknell
The wheels turn, my feet circling, trying to apply continuous pressure, shoes clipped on to the pedals
so that the bike and I are one. At times, it’s hard to sense where my body ends and the carbon frame
begins. This is what cycling feels like at its best, the perfect symbiotic relationship without me, the bike
is nothing; without it, I’d be plodding significantly slower down Route 66 than the twenty miles per hour
I’m averaging.
It feels great to be out of Death Valley, off my feet and back on the open road. The broken metatarsal
that crippled me on foot offers barely a twinge in the comfort of a rigid carbon-soled cycling shoe. The
sun is slowly rising but it’s already hot, touching twenty-one degrees. It warms my lungs and the back
of my throat but the crew have kept me hydrated. I don’t even have to worry about the fluid as long as I
drink at the required rate and my urine passes their osmolality analysis. And it’s an absolute joy – urine
testing aside – like being a professional athlete again. All I have to do is get to Lake Erie. I smile,
thinking how much fun it will be to row across it with old mate Matt Pinsent.
Then I’ll get back on the bike to New York until I finish my journey across the United States with a swim
to the Statue of Liberty. What date is it? July twentieth. We’re making good progress. I’d dearly love to
be the first man to go coast-to-coast on this unique route across this beautiful country in less than
twenty days under his own steam.
I remember Bev kissing me and saying that I’m the only athlete in the world who has the skills to do
that, although admittedly the rowing part excludes most people. And I am pretty sure she was just
flattering me. Whatever – I feel like the luckiest man in the world. It’s been six years since I retired from
full-time rowing. Six years of trying to find out who I am and what I want to do with my life.
I’ve finally reached a stage where I can see over the horizon and into my future without panicking. The
film of this trip should – touch wood – be a success for the Discovery Channel. I’ll finally get a good
contract that will make my hobby a job. Bev and I have been talking about trying for a third baby. That’s
something to look forward too! I miss the kids: Croyde with his boundless energy and Kiki with her
endless cuddles. I push the pedals a little faster. The quicker I get home, the quicker I can see them.
A car passes, one of the very few I’ve seen at this hour, but the road is wide, two lanes in each
direction, and I’m keeping inside the line of the hard shoulder. I feel particularly safe.
I lift up and stretch my back, which gives the added benefit of allowing my saddle-sore bum some
relief. I assess my body for any aches and pains that my physiotherapist Mark will get to work on later,
but aside from those associated with sitting on a bike for over fifteen hours a day, there aren’t any. I sit
back in the saddle; take a deep breath. I’ve never felt so alive.
And then … there was nothing …
21
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Another …
Now read Source 2, an article on the Teenage Cancer Trust about Stephen Sutton who died in 2014.
2. What do you understand about Stephen Sutton’s attitude towards cancer from the text?
(8 marks)
STEPHEN SUTTON
Stephen Sutton was an exceptional young man who made a huge impact as a Teenage Cancer Trust
ambassador and fundraiser.
Age: 19
Cancer type: BOWEL CANCER
Despite a terminal diagnosis, Stephen remained positive and determined to make a difference up until his death in May 2014. To date
Stephen’s Story has raised over £5 million for young people facing cancer.
Stephen was first diagnosed with colorectal cancer at the age of 15. He was supported throughout his cancer experience by Teenage
Cancer Trust and received his treatment in our three units in Birmingham.
“Teenage Cancer Trust have helped me hugely throughout my own cancer battle ... they offer hope and a
sense of community to young people with cancer like myself.”
Stephen also attended many of peer to peer support events, including our flagship weekend conference Find Your Sense of Tumour,
an event that brings together 300 young people with cancer to learn, make friends, share experiences, build confidence and have fun.
He said that attending the event in 2011 played a very important role in how he viewed his cancer.
In 2013 he decided to make a bucket-list of things he wanted to achieve via his Facebook page, with a goal of raising £10,000 for
Teenage Cancer Trust at number one on his list. He later increased this to £500,000 and then updated it to £1 million.
“I don’t see the point in measuring life in terms of time any more. I’d rather measure life in terms of
making a difference.”
After several rounds of treatment, Stephen was told his cancer was terminal. Sadly he died on 14 May 2014, but he left behind an
incredible legacy for the 7 young people diagnosed with cancer every day who need our help.
Stephen’s fundraising total is the most an individual has ever raised for Teenage Cancer Trust, and he’ll be remembered in the UK and
beyond for his positivity, determination and courage.
Stephen’s “thumbs up” moment
“I don’t think about my future and feel sorry
for myself. In fact, I feel the opposite. My
cancer has given me the opportunity to do
something truly remarkable - and educate
people about cancer.”
Stephen’s Story went viral when he posted what he thought was his last “thumbs up” photo from his hospital bed, on 22 April this year.
Already an ambassador and major fundraiser for Teenage Cancer Trust, Stephen captured the public's imagination in an
overwhelming way in the following weeks.
Comedian and long-term Teenage Cancer Trust supporter, Jason Manford, who had met Stephen at the charity’s Royal Albert Hall
concert series in March, created the Thumbs Up for Stephen campaign on social media and vowed to take the fundraising to £1
million. Stephen was featured in an amazing array of news outlets both local and global, and supported by a host of celebrities
including Stephen Fry, Russell Brand, Piers Morgan, Clare Balding, Gary Lineker, Steve Coogan, Carol Vorderman, Caitlin Moran and
even the Prime Minister.
Over 180,000 donations have been made online to Stephen’s Justgiving page and over 150,000 by text. He continues to inspire a
huge number of legacy fundraising events.
22
And finally …
Now read Source 2, a page from the charity Centrepoint called ‘James’s Story.’
2. Explain what you learn about what has happened to James.
Remember to:

show your understanding by explaining in your own words

support your ideas using the text.
(8 marks)
James's Story
As a child, James lived with his parents and seven siblings in a London council house. His
mother was a heavy drinker and drug user and abused her son regularly. "Once she
smashed my head against the toilet seat and split it open" he recalls. "She didn't know what
she was doing".
Kicked out
James tried to get away from the abuse by moving in with his sister. But her sister's
boyfriend turned against him too, and James was subjected to unending verbal abuse.
Finally he was kicked out of his sister's home at the age of 13.
Losing trust
James was homeless for the first time, and bounced from hostel to hostel throughout the
rest of his teenage years. He was alone and demoralised, reduced to begging for change to
afford clothes and food. Soon he dropped out of school too. "I'd lost my trust in people and
life" he recalls.
Alone and scared
When he turned 18, it became more difficult to get a place to sleep in hostels. For the first
time in his life, he had to sleep rough. "If I had a sleeping bag I slept in doorways, otherwise
I just had to find a blanket and lie someplace. I got chest infections, colds and chronic
diarrhoea" he says. He would go without food and was robbed and attacked often.
Safety at last
James found out about Centrepoint when another hostel referred him here. Staff quickly
recognised that he was experiencing mental health issues and was showing signs of
depression, anxiety and schizophrenia. But with careful guidance, James has begun to learn
how to manage his conditions.
Future plans
James is much happier now, making good progress in his key worker sessions and making
friends for the first time. He has taken up sport - even starring in Centrepoint's football
league - and dreams of having a steady job and place of his own.
23
Question 3:
Language Features
24
Question 3 - Comment on features of language and their
effects in Source 3.
Q3 How does the writer use language to achieve purpose? (12 marks)
Band 3
(9-12 marks)




clear evidence that the texts are understood in relation
to language features
shows clear analysis of the effect of words and phrases
shows a clear focus on language
offers relevant and appropriate quotations/ examples to
support ideas
Structure for writing about language:

For Q3 you need to use the following structure:
In source 2, we learn that …
Then ….this develops/ changes/reinforces our opinion …
Later on in the article…this it makes the reader think that…
At the end of the source… /From this I assume that…/ it also suggests that …
Writing about Language
Step 1
Find a language
feature that is being
used in the source
Step 2
Find an example of it
Step 3
How does this feature make
you respond/behave/think/
feel/imagine?
(Choose one)
Can you link this idea to
purpose?
For example:
The writer employs a direct address to the reader in the leaflet when he says, ‘You
might meet X…' This makes the reader feel as if the text is speaking to them
personally, like a personal invitation. This is more friendly and makes you feel
included and welcome, which is more likely to persuade you to make a visit.
Top tips:
Do remember:
 Comment on language NOT content
 Language = words and phrases
 That words and phrases have special
names and do specific jobs
 Some of them do special jobs and create
special effects and are called Linguistic
Features
 Use the ‘Toolkit’ on p26 to help you
 Highlight or underline features which you
will want to comment on in your answer
 Remember: always explain the effect on a
reader.
Don’t:
 Write out lengthy quotations and then
tell the examiner what they mean
 Write your opinions about the content
of the text
 Occasionally mention purpose words
like ‘inform’ and ‘persuade’ but without
linking them to anything
 Using vague and generalised phrases
such as ‘to make the reader read on,’
‘to keep the reader hooked’
25
Language Features Toolkit
The following toolkits will help you when revising and answering Question
3. Remember, this is not a feature spotting exercise. You must consider
the effect and impact on the reader.
LANGUAGE FEATURES
PURPOSE AND/OR EFFECT
adjectives/adverbs
Builds up a very full picture of the object/animal/person or the
activity so that it becomes very clear in the reader’s mind – the
reader feels s/he can picture it or see it happening very precisely.
(vivid language)
alliteration
Makes the text catchy – quick to read – grabs attention.
anecdote
A short tale or narrative that is used to illustrate a point. It can be
fiction or non-fiction.
antithesis
Contrary ideas expressed in a balanced sentence. The
juxtaposition emphasizes the contrasting ideas and gives the
effect of balance.
connectives
direct speech
emotive language
euphemism
first person pronoun
hyperbole
imagery – similes,
metaphors
Connectives help create textual cohesion. They may be used to
sequence ideas or an argument, link ideas/points or show
comparison, show a change in subject matter or tone.
Makes the character come alive. We can “hear” the way s/he
speaks – the actual vocab, grammar and tones.
The attitude and emotions of the author are transferred or made
clear to the reader.
Use of a less objectionable or harsh expression to avoid upsetting
or offending people e.g. The firm was restructuring (sacking
workers). Creates amusement in the reader, or reveals the
character of the person using it (kindhearted or sarcastic or
squeamish, for example)
1st person singular = I, me, my, mine, plural = We, us, our, ours.
Gives immediacy to the text – the author or character makes a
direct connection with the reader / audience. “We” in a speech
involves the audience with the speaker (“We all know that
violence is wrong”).
Deliberate exaggeration which is used for emphasis. Also
illustrates something of the mood of the speaker/writer.
All imagery gives the person/animal/thing being described the
characteristics of something else. It therefore enlivens
descriptions by helping us to see these people/animals/things in a
new light – in a way we may have never seen them or thought
about them before.
Metaphors are more compact and tighter in their comparative
description than similes.
26
irony
Saying the opposite of what you mean transfers the attitude and
emotions of the author to the reader.
onomatopoeia
This helps us hear the actual sound being named and therefore
we understand it properly or it transports us to the place of the
sound.
parallel construction
Parallel construction provides rhythm while it expands the detail of
the description and creates balance.
pun
Word play involving the use of a word with two different meanings
or two words that sound the same but mean different things.
Often used in advertising. Provokes amusement and therefore a
tendency for the reader to feel good about the company / product
and possibly to buy the product.
quotation
The direct use of another’s words (spoken or written) add some of
the authority of the original author to the current speaker/writer.
repetition
Repeating the same or nearly the same words for effect. This is
used to emphasise whatever is being said or written.
rhetorical questions
To get the readers’ / audience’s attention and make them think
about the answer before giving it.
rule of three
Provides rhythm as well as closure or finality along with that
sense of balance.
sarcasm
Unkind humour directed against what the writer / speaker doesn’t
like which highlights the attitude and emotions of the author.
second person pronoun
2nd person singular and plural = You, your, yours. Used in
speeches and adverts, this direct address to the listeners/viewers
involves them and may challenge them to respond, even if only
mentally. In narrative, the use shows interaction between
characters.
sentences
Varied sentence length and type (simple, compound, complex)
adds interest and fluency to a text as well as creating particular
effects. Simple sentences are often used as topic sentences to
introduce an idea or point. Compound sentences link two main
ideas. Complex sentences expand ideas or add information. Short
sentences add tension or drive home a point.
slang
statistics
technical words or jargon
Grounds the text in informality as well as a certain social group
and period of time.
A specific number or statistic gives the impression that the
speaker/writer is authoritative and knowledgeable
Sometimes, more unusual words provide more specific meaning
than common ones. Specialised or technical words make it seem
like the writer/speaker really knows the topic.
27
Question 3 Past Question
Now read Source 3, an extract from ‘Scary Monsters and Super Creeps’, where travel
writer Dom Joly is sailing on a Canadian lake.
3. How does the writer use language features in the extract?
Remember to:
 give some examples of language features
 explain the effects.
(12 marks)
28
Now read the sample answer and the examiner’s
comments:
Now read Source 3, an extract from ‘Scary Monsters and Super Creeps’, where travel
writer Dom Joly is sailing on a Canadian lake.
3. How does the writer use language features in the extract?
Remember to:
 give some examples of language features
 explain the effects.
(12 marks)
Source 3 is a narrative text, its purpose is to inform the reader about the writer’s experience
when looking for a thirty foot snake-like creature called Ogopogo. It is also trying to entertain
the reader and make him understand the writer’s feelings.
The writer uses adverbs, such as ‘violently.’ This describes the action of the verb and makes
the reader understand about the way the writer’s boat was shaking. It also suggests that
there is something bad that is going to happen, because violent is related with the action of
something bad.
Another language device used by the reader is the repetition of powerful adjectives such as
‘rough – very rough.’ This implies that the lake did not seem peaceful and that it seemed as if
there was lots of strange creatures. It also shows that the water of the lake was not as clean
and purse as it is normally. It helps the reader imagine the situation.
The writer also uses rhetorical questions such as ‘was this wise thing to be doing.’ This
makes the reader think that he is regretting what he is doing and that he now feels unsecure.
It suggests that he does not think that being alone in that lake is going to have a good end.
Another device used by the writer is metaphors such as ‘I gunned the engine.’ This is a
violent action and expresses that the writer is in a hurry and needs to escape from the
dangerous situation. The verb ‘gunned’ also makes the reader think that it has been a quick
and instant decision. ‘Walls of enemy waves’ also shows that the writer is being attacked by
strong waves and that the waves are very hard to defeat.
The writer also uses non-finite verbs, such as ‘howling – evil howling’ to show that the sound
was very scary and did not stop frightening him. He was threatened by something bad.
Repetition of the word ‘I’, shows that he was alone. He had no help and so he had to fight
alone against the monster.
Using the mark scheme:





Read the sample answer above. This time there are no annotations to help you.
Look at the mark scheme for this question on the following page.
What band/mark would you give to this candidate?
Why?
What targets would you give this candidate to help improve their answer? (Use the
marks scheme to help you.)
 Once you have made up your mind, turn to p83 to find out what the examiner gave
it and why.
29
Mark Scheme
30
R
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a
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Your Turn …
Now read Source 3, a page from an online travel company ‘Balck Tomato.’
3. How does the writer use language features in the extract?
Remember to:

give some examples of language features

explain the effects.
q
u
o
t
a
t
i
o
n
(12 marks)
31
R
e
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v
a
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t
And another …
Now read Source 3, from the website for ‘Go Ape.’
3. How does the writer use language features in the extract?
Remember to:

give some examples of language features

explain the effects.
q
u
o
t
a
t
i
o
n
(12 marks)
32
Now read Source 3, an extract from the website for the ‘Tough Mudder’ obstacle race.
3. How does the writer use language features in the extract?
Remember to:

give some examples of language features

explain the effects.
(12 marks)
And finally …
33
Question 4:
Presentational
Devices Comparison
34
Question 4 - Comment on and compare presentational
features in two texts of your choice.
4.
Comment on and compare structure and images and focus on
connotations in relation to the text. (12 marks)
Band 3
(9-12 marks)




clear evidence that the texts are understood in relation to presentational
features
clear analysis of the effect of the presentational features in both texts
relevant and appropriate examples to support ideas
clear comparison and/or cross reference showing how presentation differs
between the two texts
Top Tips:
Do:





Describe precisely what they see. Imagine the examiner can’t see the text you
are looking at – then what would you say? (Bullet point 1 of each band).
Consider what it makes you think of/feel/imagine? (Bullet point 2 of each band).
Comparing means more than making simple links – it involves discussing what is
similar between the sources and what is contrasting. Use linking words to both
compare and contrast.
Carefully select about three of the most important features. No more! (Bullet point
3 of each band). Then write a lot about a little, rather than a little about a lot!
Thinking clearly about the effect of images will have a big impact on your
responses.
Don’t:




Write a whole paragraph (or even a page) discussing genre, audience and
purpose before mentioning presentation.
Write a little about a lot.
Make vague statements like an article ‘has a photo’ or ‘has a headline’. Most of
them do!!
All presentational features are designed to stand out – so what else can you say?
Follow these stages to help you find enough to write about:
Picture
 Look at the first picture/image. Jot down what it shows. What does the picture/image
make you feel/think/imagine?
 What mood is it? How would you describe the atmosphere?
 Who might it appeal to?
Lettering
 Now look at the lettering.
 What is it used for?
 What does it say?
 How would you describe the style or fonts?
 Is there any part of it that makes you think/feel/respond in a particular way?
35
Remember:
1. Avoid making general comments e.g. ‘it stands out.’
2. Remember to use quotations.
3. Make simple comparisons and cross references.
Structuring a comparison:
1. Make general comparative statement.
2. Write in detail about the language/presentational devices in Source 3.
3. Write about either Source 1 or 2, making close comparisons to Source 3.
Discourse markers for comparison:
For ‘similarities’
For ‘differences’
Similarly
In contrast
Both
Whereas
Just as
On the other hand
Likewise
But
Also
However
In the same way
Instead of
36
Presentational Features
Toolkit
PRESENTATIONAL
FEATURE
bullet points
captions
PURPOSE AND EFFECT ON THE READER
Good way to organise a text – easier to identify different
pieces of information
Can help readers understand a picture
colour
There are lots of connections and links – colours reinforce
messages – blue= crisp/ cold/ clean. Red= passionate/ sex/
love/ dangerous/ blood
columns
A way of organising text – they help to make the text clearer
to the reader
fonts
graphs/diagrams
headings
Classic/ formal/ old-fashioned/ modern etc – fonts are
chosen to impact on different audiences - and to grab
attention
Help make difficult information easier to grasp
Important as a way of organising the text
Italics
These emphasise information – alert the reader to its
importance
logos
Symbols of a company – represent things
maps
Helpful in giving people information – finding or showing a
place
paragraphs
Organising text – comment if they are small – short/ easier to
read or longer and more detailed – this makes a difference to
a text and to the reader – connects with AUDIENCE
pictures/ images
Bring the text to life and grab attention – they can also break
up the text, which is useful and makes it more accessible to
read. They often illustrate the point of the text.
subheadings
underlining
Provides more information, develops what is suggested in
the heading
Emphasises or highlights points made
37
Useful phrases for writing about non fiction
The writer’s intention is seen in these words………..
The writer includes ………… to show…….
This argument is supported by the words…..
This image is made clear by the words……
This is demonstrated by …………
………………. shows this point clearly
The words ………….. are effective and suggest to me…….
This description ……… highlights the writer’s ……….
In my opinion this shows that …………..
This reveals that ……….
The writer uses this simile to show…..
The verbs used here help me to imagine………..
These words imply …………
The idea is introduced by ………..
This line makes it clear……….…
The image created by the writer is made clearer by……….
It is interesting that the writer uses…………….
The writer includes ……………. to show………..
38
Question 4 Sample Answer
4
Now look again at Source 1 and Source 3. Compare the way that they each use
presentational features for effect.



Remember to:
write about the way the sources are presented
explain the effect of the presentational features
compare the way they look.
(12 marks)
Both authors use various presentation devices, to convey the seriousness and attitudes of both
sources.
Firstly, source 1 displays a picture of the two siblings after the ordeal. The brother and sister are
both smiling for the camera meaning they are happy that they survived a 14 hour swim. They also
look very privaliged and surprised they have survived making them look as if they appreciate, life
more from there terrible experience. This conveys to the reader that they are very strong
characters and are somewhat role models for there efforts to survive.
Whereas, in source 2 the writer uses a picture of a man and women, preferably man and wife
displaying there eternal love for each others. I can infer this as the image shows a man blowing a
kiss, this conveys that the man cares about this women and is prepared to part from her so she
can be brought to safety. The reader automatically gains a sense of sorrow a nd sympathy
towards the man as he is sacrificing himself for the love of his wife.
Going back to source 1 the writer also uses colour connotations such as the use of the colours
grey black and white, Symbolising the tragedy of that time and displaying the mood swings that
the siblings must have faced when attacking this huge challenge. This makes the reader feel as if
they should feel sympathy towards the two survivors as they could have been horrific
repercussions to this trip.
Similarly the lifeboat source also uses colour connotations as the borders of source are golden
and very intrecatly designed, meaning that this source could possibly be evidence from the
shipwreck itself. It also uses black and white suggesting the source is very old and almost an
antique. This displays a huge feeling of importance to the reader as they begin to feel as if many
people on the ships moods were extremely dull and grey as they are aware of the disaster that
faces them.
Tracking back to source 1 the bold title suggest that it is what is supposed to stand out the most
engaging the reader. ‘Brother and sister swim 14 hours for their lives after fishing boat sinks.’ This
highlights the extreme severaty of the ordeal in which the siblings have faced. This engages the
reader resulting in them reading the whole story because of the shocking reality of the title.
On the other hand source 2 has various titles which look very delicate and intricate. To be precise
the title ‘To the lifeboats’ has various patterns on it meaning in some way it could be representing
the darkness and seriousness of what is happening on the ship. This results in making the reader
feel extremely understanding of the the depprasive mood in wich the author is trying is
demonstrate.
Using the mark scheme:




Read the sample answer above.
Look at the mark scheme for this question on the following pages.
What band/mark would you give to this candidate? Why?
Once you have made up your mind, turn to p83-4 to find out what the examiner
gave it and why.
39
Mark Scheme
40
41
R
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Your Turn …
4. Choose two of the three sources and compare the way that both texts
use presentational features for effect.
q
u
o
t
a
t
i
o
n
I have chosen source …… and …...
Remember to:
 write about the way the sources are presented
 explain the effect of the presentational features
 compare the way they look.
(12 marks)
Remember:
 What are the form, audience and purpose of each text and how does this
influence the way that it has been presented?
 Quickly identify the presentational features that are in each text (Remember
to use the Presentational Features Toolkit on p42).
 What is the impact/effect of these devices? The examiner does not want you
to feature spot.
 What are the similarities?
 What are the differences?
 Prioritise - Which are your best points?
 Gather your evidence (brief and most suitable quotations).
 Write a brief plan, outlining your main points.
 Remember to use connectives to help you write the comparison.
42
Section B:
Writing
43
Section B - Writing:
30% GCSE (40 marks)





You should spend 1 hour on this section.
Answer both questions.
One shorter task: Writing to inform, explain or describe (16 marks – 25
minutes);
One longer task: Writing to argue or persuade (24 marks – 35 minutes)
Answer Q6 before Q5.
Assessment Objectives
AO4 Writing
i.
Write to communicate clearly, effectively and imaginatively, using and adapting forms
and selecting vocabulary appropriate to task and purpose in ways that engage the
reader.
ii. Organise information and ideas into structured and sequenced sentences, paragraphs
and whole texts, using a variety of linguistic and structural features to support cohesion
and overall coherence.
iii. Use a range of sentence structures for clarity, purpose and effect, with accurate
punctuation and spelling.
Remember:
You may use any ideas
or information you have
read about in Section
A, in your writing.
44
Writing: Who, What, Why and Hows
Form
In Section B you will be asked to write in a variety of forms. It
be a:
may
 Letter
 Newspaper/magazine article
 Speech
 Leaflet
 Website entry/article
 Blog
 Script
In order to write in any of these forms you will need to
alter your writing taking into account the following:
Audience
Who are you writing for?
Your school?
The general public?
Headteacher?
Who else could you be writing for?
How will you alter your writing for each of these different
audiences?
45
Purpose
Writing to:
Inform,
explain
or describe
Argue or
persuade
What features would you use for these types of writing?
Language
Informal



Conversational
Addressing your
friends
No txt spk!
Formal

OR



Addressing someone
you don’t know or who
you respect:
Teacher/headteacher
Editor
No slang
Make sure you know which style of language is required.
46
Improving Your Writing Skills
Before you begin to answer, make sure that
you get your thinking cap on and
PLAN
How do I make my writing interesting, accurate and
appropriate?
Spend 5 minutes planning …
Have a go at:

Read the question carefully, underlining the key words.

Create a mind map of your key ideas or list them as a series of bullet points.

Expand your ideas, add notes about the content of each section and the
techniques you will use.

Think about how you could start your writing – it should be strong and grab your
reader’s attention.

Decide on your concluding point – again it needs to be powerful and not tail off.

Put your remaining ideas into a logical order to give your work a solid structure –
each point/topic will form a new paragraph.

Think about your sentence structure – use a variety of sentence types and
lengths as well as a range of punctuation (see the following pages).
What the Chief Examiner says:

“One planned and effective side of writing, shaped,
structured and paragraphed is going to do candidates
more favours than three rushed sides.”

“Candidates who attempted to use a variety of punctuation
marks and vary their sentence structures not only scored
more firmly on AO3iii/AO4iii but, again, elevated the way
their piece was matched to purpose and engaged the
reader.”
So remember to plan and check!
47
Sentence Types
Sentence Type
Simple Sentence
Compound Sentence
Complex Sentence
Minor Sentence
How can it be identified
Simple sentence = subject + verb
 It communicates one piece of
information.
 It is a complete thought.
 It contains no conjunctions.
Compound sentence = main clause + coordinating conjunction + main clause
 Co-ordinating conjunctions
(FANBOYS)
For
And
Nor
But
Or
Yet
So
Complex sentence = main clause +
subordinate clause
Contains subordinating conjunction such as
the following:
After/Although/As/ As soon as/As long as
Because/Before
Even if/Even though
If /In order that
Since/Though
Unless/Until
When/Whenever/Where/Wherever/While
It is not a complete sentence. It may be a
single word or a short phrase that can
still be understood.
Examples
1. The small, skinny boy
walked a large ferocious
dog.
2. The plane soared
through the sky.
1. The dog growled and the
cat hissed.


Function
Makes a piece of information
clear.
A well placed simple sentence
can really stand out and highlight
a point.

Links multiple pieces of
information together.

Can sound boring and repetitive
if used too often but good for
getting across factual
information.
1. He ate a Snickers
although he was allergic
to nuts.

A way of linking ideas and
showing a relationship between
them.
2. Although he was allergic
to nuts, he ate a
Snickers.

Makes writing flow nicely.

There is variation within complex
sentences so they can make our
writing sound interesting and
therefore more engaging
1.
2.
3.
4.

Can make a thought or feeling
really stand out and have a
strong impact.

Do not use these too often as
the more you used them the less
effective they become.
2. Joe was nervous yet he
marched onto the stage.
3. He laughed loudly and
he did not understand
the joke.
Crash!
Coffee?
What?
Help!
48
Writing Skills Punctuation
Punctuation
Full stops
What is its job?
Examples
To separate sentences.
Colin thought long and hard.
He had a tough journey and needed to prepare.
Used to separate a list
To separate a phrase that adds extra information or detail.
He planned to pack a wash bag, his clothes, a
medical kit and his hunting knife.
After he packed his bag, he waved his parents
goodbye.
You’re = You are
That’s = That is
Greg’s shoes = shoes that belong to Greg
Alice’s feelings = feelings belonging to Alice
What fools people can be!
Help!
Crash!
.
Comma
,
Apostrophe
‘
Exclamation mark
!
Question mark
?
Speech marks
“ ”
Semi colon
;
Ellipsis
…
Colon
:
Brackets
( )
To show that something belongs to something else.
or
To indicate that there are letters missing in a word.
To show strong feeling; it goes at the end of a sentence or phrase.
Don’t overuse them!
To show that the sentence is a direct question.
How are you?
Is this the correct answer?
To indicate when somebody is talking.
 Punctuation at the end of speech is placed before the final
speech mark
 There should be only one speaker for each paragraph
“What are you doing?” Joe asked.
He replied, “Just dancing.”
To join two sentences that are closely related. Often used instead of a
subordinating conjunction (FANBOYS), particularly ‘and.’
I walked my dog; we went to the park.
I won the lottery; the drinks are on me.
When you are deliberately missing out information.
Used to create an idea that a situation will continue forever e.g. It seems
that tis cycle of bullying will continue forever… or to allow the reader to
decide what might fill the space
I slowly opened the door and suddenly …
To indicate that a list is going to follow.
Or to join a main clause with another clause in a similar way to a semi
colon but instead of replacing a word such as ‘and’ , it replaces a word
such as ‘because’ or ‘therefore.’ There must be a complex sentence
before the clause.
To interrupt a sentence with an aside comment.
We found lots of treasures in the attic: a gold watch,
shares in an oil company and old photographs.
Carl was jealous: Lenny knew all the answers.
Joe (rather rudely) barged into the room.
I love toast in the morning (wholemeal, crispy,
melted butter).
49
Question 5:
Writing to inform,
explain, describe
50
Question 5: Writing to inform, explain, describe
Overview

You must spend 25 minutes on this question

This question will always ask you to write to inform, explain or
describe

Sometimes it will ask you to use more than one purpose e.g. to explain
and describe

Your answer will be marked for two skills:
AO3 i and ii - communication and organisation of ideas (0 -10 marks)
AO3 iii - spelling, grammar and punctuation (0 – 6 marks)

You could be asked to write in a variety of forms e.g. an article, letter,
blog, script, etc.
Top Tips:

If you write about something with roots in reality or that you know about it makes
a much stronger impression. Writing which is completely ‘invented’ is much less
convincing.

Don’t write far too much – the exam board strongly recommend that you write
approximately 1 page (depending on hand writing). They want quality not
quantity.

Make sure you time yourself carefully – only spend 25 minutes on this question.

To make sure that you don’t get your timings wrong, you could start by answering
Q6 before Q5.

Make sure you read the question carefully – if it asks you to write to inform and
describe make sure you cover both text types. It does not have to be even
coverage, but you must cover both in order to access the higher marks.

Make sure you know what each of these text types looks like and the features
they include.

Plan your answer!
Q5
51
Writing to inform, explain, describe
Structure:


Types of text:






Travel website
articles
Newspaper/magazine
articles
Letters
Website entries
Autobiographical
/personal writing
Blog



Clear opening
General information &
more specific
information
Careful ordering of
points/paragraphs
leading logically
through the topic
Words/phrases to link
points
Conclusion (possibly
summarising)
Inform, explain
or describe
Language and Style
Inform or explain:









Present tense
First or third person
Connectives
Mostly facts (but there can be
opinion if it is personal)
Specific examples
Bullet points (if appropriate)
Detail
Technical language (if
appropriate, with short
explanation)
Logical organisation
Describe:





Use of modifiers such as
adjectives and adverbs
Use of colour/shape/size/
movement/texture
Use of senses: sight, touch
(e.g. texture), hearing, taste,
sound
Words to convey feelings and
atmosphere
Use of metaphor and simile,
perhaps use of personification
52
Top Tips for Success in Writing to Inform,
Explain, Describe

Start a sentence with a verb + ing e.g. Hurrying around the corner …

Start a sentence with a verb + ed e.g. Worried, the man hurried around the
corner …

Start a sentence with an adverb e.g. Slowly the cat stretched …

Use a range of appropriate connectives (see connectives page).

Use a combination of simple, compound and complex sentences.

Use a combination of long and short sentences e.g. You might think that long,
twisting sentences are always the best way of expressing yourself. They
aren’t.

Try not to use the words: ‘and,’ ‘then.’

Use clear paragraphs.

Try not to use pronouns (I, me, he, she, herself, you, it, that, they, each, few,
many, who, whoever, whose, someone, everybody, etc.); they confuse the
reader and make your writing vague.

Try to spell correctly, but use adventurous words even if you are not sure how
to spell them.

Use occasional interesting adjectives and adverbs e.g. he swept the vast floor
lovingly.

Use some similes and metaphors, e.g. His face was like a half-squeezed
orange. Or His face was a half-squeezed orange.

Write neatly and not too large.

Select vocabulary that is appropriate to the form, the purpose and the
audience.

Try to avoid nouns and verbs that sound very general or vague.

In a ‘describe’ question, don’t write a story!
53
Shorter Writing Task
5. Write a short piece of travel writing explaining how you coped with a challenging journey.
Remember to:
 write a short piece of travel writing
 use language to explain.
Try to write approximately one page.
(16 marks)
1. Read the first exemplar answer below including the examiner’s comments and marks.
2. Remember the examiner will give this answer two marks:
 Communication and organisation of ideas (AO3 i, ii) - 0- 10 marks
 Accuracy (AO3 iii) – 0 - 6 marks.
Candidate 1
idea
The most challenging journey I have done? Well, it would have to be when I went to india and
me, my father and sister had to go on a 8 hour car journey from Delhi to Mumbai and it was most
definetly the challenging journey I had done.
paragraphs used
vocab
lengthy
anecdote
explains
how he
couldn’t
cope
The journey started well. We were all relaxed sat in the taxi. Suddenly the air conditioning had
stopped working and it was 45 degrees outside! We all started to panic as we were roasting in the
car. I felt so dehydrated and sweat was dripping off my forehead. We had no choice but to
ultimately carry on our journey.
range of sentence demarcation
Two hours into the journey, apart from feeling really hot we were ok for a while, but then after
eating some hot samosas, my stomach had a funny feeling and this feeling kept getting worse
and worse by the minute. All of a sudden I asked my father to stop the car and as soon as he
stopped I ran into a field that was nearby and felt sick everywhere. It was the worst feeling that I
had felt in my whole life. I then started to get a bit home sick as after having that bad experience.
I wanted to go home and relax. I started to miss my mother and brother as they could sadly not
come with us to India.
punctuation
varies sentences
Eventually we got back on the road and after four hours of driving we decided to get something to
eat and drink. After having a relaxing break we decided to get to Mumbai as fast as we could. The
car we were driving in began to slowly slow down to the point we were stuck in the middle lane of
the motorway. We all said to ourselves ‘could this journey not get any worse.’ So many cars were
honking their horns at us and they started to get annoyed. Sadly there was nothing that we could
do.
paragraphs
Eventually we rang the breakdown service after moving the car from the middle lane of the
motorway to the side of the motorway and they got to us after waiting an hour for them. There
was a major problem with the car as the timing belt had come off the engine. My father reassured
me and my sister that we were going to be ok.
The breakdown service called a pickup truck to be taken to a garage nearby where we were
going in Mumbai. Thankfully the service also give us a lift to our destination.
That was by far the most challenging journey.
Examiner’s Comments:
AO3 I, ii:
This candidate met all the criteria for Band 1 and some of Band 2. Paragraphs are used throughout and showed an understanding of
structure. Vocabulary was sometimes chosen for deliberate effect and there were clear attempts to use the appropriate register.
However, the explanation was mainly via description and there was a lengthy anecdote so it was not as secure on purpose. 7 marks
out of 10 were awarded.
AO3 iii:
The candidate showed accurate use of sentence demarcation and punctuation. Spelling was generally accurate. 5 marks out of 6.
54
Next:





The second exemplar answer is better than the first one that you have read.
Read it through first and then try and work out how and why it is better than the first
one.
What two marks would you give it? (AO3 I, ii and AO3 iii)
What targets would you give this candidate in order to make it better?
Answers on p84-5.
Candidate 2
P
A
F
T
Explain
Anyone
Article
Formal
One of the most challenging journey’s I have ever been on is a hike to the tip of the Alps in
Europe. It took me and a group of extremely experienced hikers, two and three quarters days
to reach the summit of the tallest peak. We set out on our expedition on the 17th October
2013. It was an amazing journey that I will remember for a lifetime.
Along the way we came across many challenging situations. The first was the wild bears at
the very bottom of the steep slopes. We hadn’t been informed as to what the bears didn’t like
– we steared away, we avoided them like the Plague! Despite our ‘careful’ decisions they
caught up with us, the only thing to do was a suggestion made by our Team Leader – Martin.
He advised us to make no eye contact with the wild beasts, they are giants. Everyone
followed the rules set by our skilled leader. We had overcome our first problem.
Secondly we reached the midway point after 26 hours, the lack of oxygen was really starting
to get a hold of me, as if I was being strangled by the wind. To start with I already have
asthma, but this was possibly the worst I have ever felt with my breathing. Oxygen tanks had
been left at the base a third of the way down so we set up camp and enclosed as weary
selves in the flimsy red tents. Trying to restore our energy.
Finally after my body had seemed to have immunized to the lack of oxygen we had up in the
clouds, we were 1km off the summit. What a great feeling! I felt glorious, I knew this was a
great goal to achieve at my age. A huge avalanche started as strong winds picked up. We
needed shelter, fast. Trees were our only savior. Anxiously playing hide and seek with the
summit, we supposed ourselves. We had survived the avalanche … How did we possibly
survive?
55
Mark Schemes
Shorter Question – inform, explain, describe (16 marks)
A03 i, ii
Skills
Mark Band 3
Communication

writes in a way which shows clarity of thought and communicates with success

engages the reader with more detailed informative and descriptive ideas

clearly states the purpose and intention of writing the letter e.g. by articulating
ideas, schemes and plans, intentions

writes a formal letter, the tone of which is appropriately serious and which may
show subtlety, begins to employ e.g. emphasis, assertion, reason, emotive
language

uses devices as appropriate

uses words effectively including discursive / informative markers e.g.
‘furthermore…’, ‘another point to make…’
‘clarity’ ‘success’
7-10 marks
Organisation of Ideas

employs paragraphs effectively in a whole text

begins to use a variety of structural features e.g. different paragraph lengths,
dialogue, indented sections if appropriate

presents well thought-out ideas in sentences
Mark Band 2
‘some’ ‘attempts’
5 – 8 marks
Communication

communicates ideas with some success

engages the reader by presenting a point of view with some reasoning and
persuasive ideas -though links in arguments may be tenuous, e.g. makes
reference to the issue and its implications

shows awareness of the purpose and intention of writing the article e.g. by
stating a number of related ideas

register may vary between formal and colloquial or slang, the tone may be
unvaried

uses some devices but not always appropriately

uses limited vocabulary but includes argumentative /persuasive markers
Organisation of Ideas

uses paragraphs which may enhance meaning

some evidence of structural features, e.g. short paragraphs, dialogue if
appropriate
Mark Band 1
‘limited’
1 – 4 marks
Communication

communicates few ideas with limited success

engages the reader in a limited way by reference to one or two ideas, e.g.
makes brief reference to the topic which reiterates the question

shows limited awareness of the purpose and intention of writing the article

e.g. by stating simple ideas

register may vary between formal and colloquial or slang, sustaining neither

use of devices such may not be appropriate or effective;

limited vocabulary evident with arbitrary or little use of argumentative
/persuasive markers
Organisation of Ideas

shows evidence of erratic paragraph structure

show limited variety of structural features, e.g. one-sentence paragraphs,
some punctuated dialogue if appropriate
0 marks
nothing worthy of credit
56
AO3, iii English
AO4, iii English Language
Skills

uses complex grammatical structures and punctuation with success

organises writing using sentence demarcation accurately

employs a variety of sentence forms to good effect including short sentences

shows accuracy in the spelling of words from an ambitious vocabulary

uses standard English appropriately

writes with control of agreement, punctuation and sentence construction

organises writing using sentence demarcation which is mainly accurate

employs a variety of sentence forms

shows accuracy in the spelling of words in common use in an increasingly
developed vocabulary

uses standard English appropriately

writes with some control of agreement, punctuation and sentence construction
Mark Band 1

organises writing using sentence demarcation which is sometimes accurate
1-2 marks

writes simple and some complex sentences

shows accuracy in the spelling of words in common use

uses standard English
Mark Band 3
5-6 marks
Mark Band 2
3-4 marks
0 marks
nothing worthy of credit
57
Your turn:
On the following page there are a selection of typical shorter writing tasks. Some
of them may be familiar to you from past exam papers. Choose one, or more, of
the following questions and have a go at answering it.
Remember to:
and
Spend 5 minutes checking …

your spelling and vocabulary

punctuation – full stops and capital letters are the essential but also remember
speech marks, apostrophes, commas, colons and semi colons.

if you have answered the question

if you have used all the appropriate features/techniques
Use the following checklist to help you.
58
Writing Tasks
Self Assessment Mark Scheme
The following self assessment student friendly mark scheme has been produced
by AQA to help you.
Organisation
1. Have I use paragraphs properly to mark the topic shifts in my writing or have
used the same layout features as a real text in this genre?
Content
2. Is my piece of writing clear to read from beginning to end?
3. Have I used some details to make my piece of writing interesting?
4. Am I really sure about the purpose and have I stuck to it all the way through?
5. Have I used the right kind of language for this purpose?
6. Have I remembered who I am writing it for and made it sound right for them?
7. Have I used really good vocabulary?
Accuracy
8. Have I written in Standard English?
9. Have I used lots of different types of sentence to make my writing more
interesting?
10. Have I remembered to punctuate my sentences?
11. Apostrophes checked?
12. Are all my basic spellings ok and my tricky words as good as I can get them?
59
Shorter Writing Tasks – Writing to Inform, explain,
describe
25 minutes
What the examiners say:






The task requires candidates to inform/describe and explain.
Your challenge is to do this with a piece of writing that is engaging and
original, but not very long.
Successful responses should be interesting as well as well-structured.
You also need to show you can a variety of writing devices.
Try to write approximately one page in your answer booklet.
Try not to write a story.
Have a go at one or more of the questions below.
When you have finished look at the self assessment checklist that follows
and ask yourself if you have done the best you can.
Then have a look at the mark scheme and ask yourself what mark/band you
would give yourself.
What could you do to improve your answer?
1. Imagine that you are going to do work experience in a Wildlife Park or another visitor
attraction.
Write a letter to the Personnel Manager introducing yourself and informing him or her
about what job you would like to do and why. (Sample Paper)
2. Write a letter to your headteacher explaining how to improve your school or college.
Remember to:
 write a letter
 explain the things that would make your school or college better
3. Write a letter to a shop to
 inform them about the present you bought from them
 explain what went wrong with it.
4. Your local council has asked for suggestions for a new leisure facility for teenagers in
your area. Write a letter suggesting an idea and why you think it would be good.
5. Is there an everyday activity which you hate doing? Write an article for a magazine
explaining what it is and why you dislike it so much.
6. Imagine you are going to work in a veterinary surgery for work experience.
Write a letter to the senior vet introducing yourself and informing him or her about
what job you would like to do in the surgery and why.
60
7. Imagine you are helping to organise an end of year party at your school or college. Write
to the manager of a local hotel explaining what type of party you want and asking for
information about their facilities and prices.
8. You have witnessed a car accident on your way to school caused by a dog running onto
the road. The dog was not hurt but the car hit a lamp post and was damaged. You have
been asked to write a statement about what you saw by the car owner, to send to the
insurance company.
9. A place can appear to be very different if you visit it at different times of year. Choose a
place that you know well and describe it at two different times of year for a travel
website. Remember to:
 write about a place
 write to describe.
10. A new TV series ‘Dream Jobs’ is giving people the chance to work in their dream job for
a day. Write a letter to the producers explaining what your dream job would be and why
you would love to try it. Remember to:
 write a letter
 use language to explain.
11. Your school or college has set up its own radio station. Write the script for a short radio
broadcast informing students about a good place to visit in your area. Remember to:
 write a script
 use language to inform.
12. Your local newspaper is running a weekly column called The Food I Couldn’t Live
Without. Write a short article for the column explaining which food is your personal
favourite and why. Remember to:
 write an article
 use language to explain.
13. A new website called Outdoor Exploring for Kids has just been set up.
Write a short article for the website describing a place you have explored and the
most interesting thing you found there. Remember to:
 write an article
 use language to describe
14. Write a short article, for your college magazine or blog, describing what you love or hate
about winter. Remember to:
 write an article
 use language to describe
15. Your local newspaper is running a weekly column called ‘The Food I couldn’t Live
Without.’ Write a short article for the column explaining which food is your personal
favourite and why. Remember to:
 write an article
 use language to explain
16. Write a short article for a nature magazine describing an aspect of the natural world
that you find beautiful. Remember to:
 write an article
 language to describe.
61
Question 6:
Writing to persuade
or argue
62
Question 6: Writing to persuade, argue
To ensure that you don’t miss out this
question, answer Q6 before Q5.
Overview




You must spend 35 minutes on this question
This question will always ask you to write to argue, persuade
Your answer will be marked for two skills:
AO3 i and ii - communication and organisation of ideas (0 -16 marks)
AO3 iii - spelling, grammar and punctuation (0 – 8 marks)
You could be asked to write in a variety of forms e.g. an article, letter, blog, script,
etc.
Top Tips:

As this question is worth more marks, your response should be longer –
approximately 2 pages (depending on handwriting).

BUT, remember not to woffle and write quantity rather than quality.

Make sure you time yourself carefully – only spend 35 minutes on this question.

Make sure you know what each of the forms in which they may ask you to write –
what is an article, a blog, a speech?

Think carefully about the appropriate tone – don’t be too informal. Even if it asks you
to write a letter to a friend or a blog, they are expecting you to write in Standard
English, using a variety of sentence types correctly punctuated and to use an
interesting vocabulary. It is not acceptable to use text speak or to write
ungrammatically.

Try and grab your reader with an engaging opening. If you are stuck about how to
start, leave a space and come back to it at the end. Try to open your writing with:
 A short piece of conversation
 An anecdote
 A description
Q6
 A rhetorical question

Include a mid – way ‘hook’ – something to keep your reader interested.
This could be a new angle on an argument or a bold statement.

Don’t fade out – your ending needs to be as strong as the opening. You could
address the reader directly or use imperatives to make them think. Your final
paragraph should always leave your reader with a clear impression of your ideas and
your point of view. It should link back to the introduction to round off your writing.

Try and have/maintain a clear and distinct point of view. To ensure this plan your
answer!

You can use checklist approaches using mnemonics like ‘DAFOREST’ or
PERFORM.’ However, be careful that you don’t concentrate on including stylistic
features at the expense of interesting and engaging content. You don’t need to
include every stylistic feature, but you do need to have something interesting to write
about.
63
Writing to persuade or argue
Types of text:





Structure:


Newspaper
Magazine article
Speech
Website entry
Leaflet


Persuade or
argue
Argue:


Persuade:











Present tense
First person
Logical connectives or linking words
(therefore, because)
Direct address to reader (If you don’t vote
to ban hunting then you will be sentencing
many more defenceless animals to a
protracted, painful death.)
Emotive language (defenceless, painful)
Identify with audience by using ‘we’
Apparent balance
Some short sentences for dramatic impact
Perhaps some attempt to shock reader into
agreement
Varied choice of adverbs and adjectives
Some ‘literary’ devices such as alliteration,
groups of three, repetition
Opening statement – stating opinion
Series of points +
evidence/elaboration
Series of paragraphs – argument
nd
then counter-argument (2
guessing)
Summary and conclusion – restating
opinion





+





Present tense
First person (I think that …) and impersonal
style (It could be argued that …)
Formal language
Balanced sentences
Specific examples of situations
Range and variety of points
Phrases to give own opinion (I believe/In my
opinion/I am convinced that)
Countering opposite points of view,
discrediting the other side’s views politely
Sequencing, cause and effect and
comparative connectives
Rhetorical questions (Is this the sort of
country we want?)
Similes and metaphors (Smoking makes
your breath smell like a car’s exhaust fumes.)
Exclamations! – make a point dramatic
PERFORM
Personal address to involve the reader
Emotive language and strong ending
Rhetorical questions and repetition
Facts and formal tone
Opening statement to grab audience
Rule of Three
Markers or connectives to shape writing
64
Persuasive Writing Toolkit
DAFOREST
Direct Address
Alliteration
Facts
Opinion
Repetition/rhetorical questions
Emotive language
Statistics
Triples (rule of three)
65
Persuasive Techniques
Match the technique to the example:
Technique
Example
Alliteration
A fox is a living creature
Fact
90% of animals
Opinion
The weak and defenceless fox
Rhetorical question
People should be more careful
Emotive language
So why don’t people stop
hunting?
Statistics
cold, tired and hungry
Triplets
I believe hunting is a good thing
Metaphor
The bright and blazing sun
Command/imperative
We don’t have to put up with it
Modal verb
Think about this idea
Personal pronouns
An army of hunting dogs
66
Longer Writing Task
Sample Answer
6. “Nearly half of British children can’t swim – and it’s their parents’ fault,” says Rebecca
Adlington, Olympic swimmer.
Write a magazine article persuading parents of the importance of teaching children to
swim.
Remember to:
 write a magazine article
 use language to persuade.
Try to write approximately two pages.
(24 marks)
Almost half of Britain’s children are unable to swim, is
it parents fault?
To all the parents out there who have children, can your child swim? This is a very
serious case. Studies have shown that a person is more likely to survive, if they come
into difficulty by being able to swim. Many parents out there don’t have all the time in the
world to be teaching their young to swim but it is extremely important. In the following
article there will be some reasons that your childs swimming is a MUST!
Many parents think that swimming is just a hobby, but they are wrong. It’s one of life’s
most important skills and people really need to realise that. A lot of disasters that are in
the news daily that involve children are most commonly to do with them drowning. If the
only know how to swim, things like that wouldn’t happen. In our local bourough we have
several swimming pools to teach your young in; Highshead, Jumping Jacks, Hickstead
and Lower Newton. These are some of the best, and they are all free …
Do you really think it’s down to you? A lot of parents are totally in diniall about this
subject. We asked an Olympic swimmer from team GB on her opinion, she stated
‘Nearly half of British children can’t swim – and it’s their parents’ fault.’ Clearly coming
from a professional swimmer she knows best. All you parents out there, get your children
splish splashing around, it’s fun and beneficial.
I hope this article has really helped you in thinking about teaching your child to swim. It’s
only practice, practice, practice, once they’ve got it they’ve got it forever. It’s extremely
important.
Editor and writer
Image of 5 year old children
being taught to swim.
Enjoying themselves.
67
You be the marker:
1. Using the longer writing task mark scheme (p69-70) mark and annotate
this answer trying to pick out what you think the examiner would be
looking for.
2. Begin by underlining all the interesting vocabulary you can find.
3. Then highlight the linguistic features used.
4. Look at the use of sentences – are they varied?
5. What mark or band would you give this answer? (Remember this will be
two marks) Answer on p85-6.
Your turn …
On the following page you will find a selection of longer writing tasks.
As with the shorter writing tasks, choose one or more and have a go.
Don’t forget to:
 Plan your answer
 Remember the techniques that you could use – A FOREST, PERFORM,
etc.
 Remember to use the correct form and tone
 Check your work
 Use the self assessment checklist and make improvements

Refer to the mark scheme
68
Mark Schemes
Longer question – persuade, argue (24 marks)
AO3, i, ii English
AO4, i, ii English
Language
Mark Band 3
‘clear’ ‘success’
11-16 marks
Skills
Communication

writes in a way which shows clarity of thought and communicates with success

engages the reader with more detailed argument and persuasive ideas, e.g. makes
reference to consequences, implications

clearly states the purpose and intention of writing the article e.g. by articulating

ideas, concerns, issues

writes a formal article, the tone of which is appropriately serious and which may show
subtlety, begins to employ e.g. emphasis, assertion, reason, emotive language

uses devices such as the rhetorical question, lists, hyperbole as appropriate

uses words effectively including argumentative/ persuasive markers e.g.
‘‘Furthermore’, ‘Alternatively’
Organisation of Ideas

employs paragraphs effectively in a whole text

uses a variety of structural features e.g. different paragraph lengths, dialogue,
indented sections if appropriate

presents well thought out ideas in sentences
Mark Band 2
‘some’
5-10 marks
Communication

communicates ideas with some success

engages the reader by presenting a point of view with some reasoning and
persuasive ideas -though links in arguments may be tenuous, e.g. makes reference to
the issue

and its implications

shows awareness of the purpose and intention of writing the article e.g. by stating a
number of related ideas

register may vary between formal and colloquial or slang, the tone may be unvaried

uses some devices such as the rhetorical question, lists, exaggeration but not always

appropriately

uses limited vocabulary but includes argumentative /persuasive markers
Organisation of Ideas

uses paragraphs which may enhance meaning

some evidence of structural features, e.g. short paragraphs, dialogue if appropriate
Mark Band 1
‘limited’
1-4 marks
Communication

communicates few ideas with limited success

engages the reader in a limited way by reference to one or two ideas, e.g. makes brief

reference to the topic which reiterates the question

shows limited awareness of the purpose and intention of writing the article e.g. by

stating simple ideas

register may vary between formal and colloquial or slang, sustaining neither

use of devices such as the rhetorical question and lists may not be appropriate or

effective;

limited vocabulary evident with arbitrary or little use of argumentative /persuasive
markers
Organisation of Ideas

shows evidence of erratic paragraph structure

show limited variety of structural features, e.g. one-sentence paragraphs, some
punctuated dialogue if appropriate
0 marks
nothing worthy of credit
69
AO3,iii English
AO4,iii English Language
Mark Band 3
6-8 marks
Skills







Mark Band 2

3-5 marks




Mark Band 1

0-2 marks



0 marks
uses complex grammatical structures and punctuation with success
organises writing using sentence demarcation accurately
employs a variety of sentence forms to good effect including short
sentences
shows accuracy in the spelling of words from an ambitious
vocabulary;
uses standard English appropriately
writes with control of agreement, punctuation and sentence
construction
organises writing using sentence demarcation which is mainly
accurate;
employs a variety of sentence forms
shows accuracy in the spelling of words in common use in an
increasingly developed vocabulary
uses standard English appropriately
writes with some control of agreement, punctuation and sentence
construction
organises writing using sentence demarcation which is sometimes
accurate
writes simple and some complex sentences
shows accuracy in the spelling of words in common use
uses standard English
nothing worthy of credit
70
Longer Writing Tasks
Writing to Persuade or argue
35 minutes
What the examiner says:
 Make sure you are answering the task. Read the wording of the
question carefully and plan your answer.
 Try to be confident in your views and develop your ideas clearly and
in detail.
 Make sure your answer is well structured.
 Make sure you complete it in the time available.
 Try to write approximately 2 pages.
1. You are going to write an article for your school newspaper persuading your readers
that we should help homeless people.
The article should be about
 where there are homeless people
 who they are and the situation they are in
 what we should do about it
2. Write the text for a leaflet to persuade young people in your area to take part in a
sponsored event for charity.
The leaflet should be about:
 the sponsored event of your choice
 which charity the event is for
 why young people should support the charity.
Remember to:
 write a leaflet
 use language and techniques to persuade.
3. Explain why you would or would not like your local town to be a car-free zone. Think
about:
 The advantages of getting rid of cars
 The disadvantages of getting rid of cars
 How you feel about cars in your local town
 The overall effect of the change on your lifestyle
4. Your Headteacher has asked for suggestions for someone you know to visit the school
and talk to your year group.
Write a letter to him or her suggesting someone and persuading the Head why this
person would be suitable.
5. A tourist magazine has a section called ‘Visit this beach.’ Write an article for it in which
you persuade readers to visit a beach you have chosen. You will need to describe the
beach and what makes it so great.
6. Explain why you would or would not enjoy having a dog. Consider:
71




the advantages of having a dog
the disadvantages of having one
how you feel about dogs
the effect of a dog on your lifestyle
7. Choose an activity or hobby that you are interested in. Write an article for your school or
college magazine persuading other students to try it. Remember to:
 write an article for students
 write to persuade.
8. ‘Sports stars are good role models for young people.’
Write an article for a magazine of your choice arguing for or against this view.
Remember to:
 write an article
 argue your point of view.
9. Write a letter to a well-known person persuading them to visit your school or college for
the benefit of the students.
Remember to:
 write a letter
 use language to persuade.
10. ‘Governments, doctors, and the media are right to tell us what to eat and what not to eat.’
Write a speech for a classroom debate arguing for or against this opinion.
Remember to:
 write a speech
 use language to argue.
11. Write the text for a leaflet to persuade students to help make your school or college
more environmentally friendly.
Remember to:
 write a leaflet
 use language to persuade.
12. A competition has been launched to find a team of brave young people to complete an
expedition to the North Pole. Write a letter to the organisers persuading them that you
should be on the team:
Remember to:
 write a letter
 use language to persuade
13. ‘Governments, doctors, and the media are right to tell us what to eat and what not to eat.’
Write a speech for a classroom debate arguing for or against this opinion.
Remember to:
 write a speech
 use language to argue
14. An area which you like and value in your local community is to be used for building a new
office block.
Write a letter to your local council arguing that the building project should not go
ahead.
Remember to:
 write a letter
 use language to argue.
72
Word Work
73
Tricky Words: The Dirty Thirty
The Dirty Thirty
Many people struggle with spelling these thirty words, and because they are so often
spelt wrong, it is likely that examiners will be watching out for them while marking
papers. After each word there are tips and tricks to help you remember how to spell
them.
1. accommodation
Imagine two people with the initials CC and MM sharing accommodation to help you
remember that this word is spelt with two Cs and two Ms.
2. beautiful
The first part of this word is the tricky part to spell. Try saying the following to
yourself: “Big Ears Aren’t Ugly - they’re beautiful”.
3. because
Big Elephants Can Always Understand Small Elephants.
4. beginning
Think of the beginning of Jesus’s life: Mary and Joseph had to beg to stay at the
inn, but, because there was no room, Jesus was born in a stable.
5. believe
“I before E except after C.” Try not to believe a lie.
6. business
Sometimes it’s useful to look for smaller words within a word. Think of someone who
has business on a BUS IN ESSex.
7. ceiling
“I before E except after C.”
Ceiling Entrance In Loft.
8. decide
Imagine buying Christmas presents to help you remember that this word is spelt with
a C and not an S: “In December you need to decide which presents to buy”.
9. definitely
Think of the words fin or fini at the end of a film – they show that it is definitely over.
‘Definitely’ has the word ‘finite’ in the middle of it.
10. disappear
Try splitting the word into ‘dis-’ and ‘appear’.
Don’t Idly Stroke A Prickly PEAR
Words in ‘disappear’:
disappear – sap
disappear – pear
disappear – app
74
11. disappoint
Try splitting the word into ‘dis-’ and ‘appoint’.
To remember that the word has two Ps, try saying to yourself: “Don’t disappoint your
proud papa.”
12. embarrass
Think of this embarrassed person to remember that you need to spell the word with
two Rs and two Ss: “I turn really red when my sister sings”.
13. extremely
‘Extremely’ is spelt with three Es. Three rhymes with E, which should help you to
remember the number you need.
14. friend
“I before E except after C”
‘Friend’ ends with the word ‘end’. Think to yourself: “I don’t want to end a
relationship with a good friend”.
15. immediately
‘Immediately’ has the word ‘media’ in the middle of it: I Manage MEDIA To Earn a
Living Yearly.
If you struggle to remember that the word is spelt with two Ms, try saying the
following to yourself: “My mother ate immediately.”
16. minute
‘Minute’ has the word ‘nut’ in the middle of it.
17. necessary
Try using one of these mnemonics to help you remember that ‘necessary’ is spelt
with one C and two Ss:
“I drink my tea in one cup with two sugars.”
“My shirt has one collar and two sleeves.”
18. neighbour
This word is spelt with the E before the I – remember that neighbours live next door
in grand houses.
19. nervous
That sneaky U in ‘nervous’ is easy to forget – think of someone who makes you feel
uncomfortable and imagine saying to them “Only yoU make me nervous”.
20. opportunity
Remember that ‘opportunity’ has the word ‘port’ in it. Break the word down in your
head as you write it to help you spell it correctly: OP PORT UNI TY.
21. persuade
Please Erase Records Showing Upsetting And Delicate Examples
22. queue/
23. queuing
Think of the two UEs queuing up after the Q.
If it helps, imagine or invent two people with the initials ‘UE’ who you wouldn’t want to
be stuck in a line with, e.g. Ugly Emma and Unbearable Eric.
24. quiet
Quiet: Understand It Ends Talking
75
To help you remember how the end of this word is spelt, imagine an embarrassed
person saying: “Please keep quiet about my diet.”
25. quite
Think of something you hate and then say to yourself: “It is Quite Unbelievably
Impossible To Enjoy ____.”
26. receive
“I before E except after C.”
The opposite of ‘give’ is ‘receive’.
27. separate
Look for smaller words in the middle of ‘separate’ to help you remember the order of
the letters:
separate - rat
separate – para
Alternatively, remember that the two As are separated with an R.
28. sincerely
Try working your way up from the word ‘sin’ to ‘sincerely’ by adding two letters at a
time to create a new word at each step:
SIN
SINCE
SINCERE
SINCERELY
29. surprise
Sarah Understands Rude People’s Rudeness Intensely Shocks Emma
30. until
To help you remember how the end of this word is spelt, say to yourself: “I will only
use one L until the spelling rule changes.”
This spelling list was created by Spellzone.
(http://www.spellzone.com/word_lists/list.cfm?wordlist=4200)
Go to their website to test yourself on these tricky words.
76
Spelling Strategies
 Break it into sounds (u-n-i-o-n)
 Break it into syllables (con-tin-ent)
 Break it into affixes (dis + satisfy)
 Use a mnemonic (Never Eat Chips Eat Salad Sandwiches And
Remain Young!)
 Refer to a word in the same family (chemical, chemist, chemistry)
 Over-articulate it (Wed-nes-day)
 Words within words (GUM in argument)
 Refer to word history (bi = two, cycle = wheels)
 Use analogy (through, rough, enough)
 Use a key word (I’m – to remember a apostrophe can replace a
missing letter)
 Apply spelling rules ( hopping = short vowel sound, hoping =
long vowel)
 Learn by sight (look-say-cover-write check)
 Visual memory (recall images, colour, font)
W.A.L.T.......
W.I.L.F........
77
Connectives
Adding
Cause and Effect
Sequencing
and
because
so
therefore
thus
consequently
next
then
finally
first,
second,
meanwhile
after
also
as well as
moreover
too
Qualifying
Emphasising
however
although
unless
except
if
yet
in particular
especially
significantly
indeed
notably
obviously
clearly
Illustrating
Comparing
for example
equally
similarly
in the same way
likewise
like
as with
such as
for instance
as revealed by
in the case of
Contrasting
whereas
alternatively
instead of
otherwise
unlike
on the other hand
78
Top Tips
79
Unit 1: The Final Countdown
Reading:
1. Read the questions first so that you know what the examiners are looking
for.
2. Read actively, highlighting interesting words and ideas in the text as you notice them.
3. Get your timing right – spend most time on the questions with most marks
4. Language question – mention:
 The words the writer uses: formal, informal, chatty, technical, scientific,
unusual, unfamiliar, complex?
 What effect this has on the reader (easy to read, mysterious, interesting?)
5. Layout question - describe what you see in:
 Use of pictures
 Colour-scheme
 Use of headings and sub-headings
 Mention other ways that the writer tries to attract our attention and make the
text look interesting
 Compare
Writing
1. Get your timing right – 25 minutes on the first task (writing to describe/explain) and
35 on the second task (writing to persuade)
2. Plan – have 5 paragraphs for each answer e.g. Persuade: 1 benefit 1, 2 benefit 2, 3
benefit 3, 4 arguments against, 5 your view
3. Making it interesting:
 Use a range of sentence types and lengths
 Reject the first word you think of (instead of ‘bad’ say: unpleasant, alarming,
horrific, appalling, inappropriate, menacing)
 Try to use phrases instead of single words: instead of saying ‘her face’ say
‘her memorable face’, ‘her wrinkled face’, ‘her unforgettable’, ‘her heavily
creased face’)
 Use the senses – sight, sound, smell, texture, taste Use questions (‘Where
was the noise coming from?’)
 Use dialogue (‘You know there’s another room next door?’ she said)
4. Check
 As you read, keep asking yourself whether you are explaining ‘why’ and ‘how’
 As you write, keep asking yourself whether you are (a) being accurate and (b)
being interesting
5. Accuracy:
 Use paragraphs (leave a space between each one)
 Use sentences (short and long)
 Be accurate
 Be interesting
 Be confident
80
Answers
81
Answers
Q1 (a) List four things you learn about Dan and Kate Suski from the article. (4 marks)
Give one mark to each of the following possible answers up to a maximum of 4:
 they are American.
 they are brother and sister.
 they swam for 14 hours to reach safety.
 Dan is 30.
 Dan is an IT professional.
 Dan is from San Francisco.
 Kate is 39.
 Kate is an architect.
 Dan and Kate talked to each other as they swam.
 Dan and Kate were treated in hospital later.
Q1 (b) What do you understand about the difficulties the Suskis faced when their boat
simple
reference
sank? (4 marks)
quotation
Inference
x1
They spoke about the thing that might kill them during the long swim ‘considered the possible
ways we might die. Would we drown? Be eaten by a shark? Hyperthermia?’ This could imply that
they are coming to terms with the danger of the situation and the fact that they might not both
statement
make it home alive. The text also talks about the condition of the water in the phrase ‘at least
quotation
eight miles from the shore and being tossed by tall waves’. This shows just how difficult it would
have been to actually swim against the waves. This also implies that it would have been easy to
get lost by the distance between them and the shore or be dragged further out to sea by the size
and strength of the waves.
statement
Examiner’s Comments:
 All Band 4.
 This answer was awarded full marks (4)
Q2 What do you understand about the final moments before the sinking of the Titanic
from the text? (8 marks)
Examiner’s comments:
Candidate 1:
 All band 2 criteria covered
 2 supported statements
 1 inference
 This was awarded 6 marks out of 8
Candidate 2:
 All Band 3 criteria covered
 3 examples of inference
 Use of supported statements
 This answer was awarded full marks – 8 marks.
82
Inference
x2
Q3 Now read Source 3, an extract from ‘Scary Monsters and Super Creeps,’ where
travel writer Dom Joly is sailing on a Canadian lake. How does the writer use
language features in the extract?(12 marks)
Source 3 is a narrative text, its purpose is to inform the reader about the writer’s experience when
looking for a thirty foot snake-like creature called Ogopogo. It is also trying to entertain the reader
and make him understand the writer’s feelings.
language
feature
+
quotation
language
feature
+
quotation
language
feature
+
quotation
The writer uses adverbs, such as ‘violently.’ This describes the action of the verb and makes the
reader understand about the way the writer’s boat was shaking. It also suggests that there is
something bad that is going to happen, because violent is related with the action of something
bad.
Band 2
effect
Another language device used by the reader is the repetition of powerful adjectives such as
‘rough – very rough.’ This implies that the lake did not seem peaceful and that it seemed as if
there was lots of strange creatures. It also shows that the water of the lake was not as clean and
purse as it is normally. It helps the reader imagine the situation.
language
feature
+
quotation
The writer also uses rhetorical questions such as ‘was this wise thing to be doing.’ This makes
the reader think that he is regretting what he is doing and that he now feels unsecure. It suggests
that he does not think that being alone in that lake is going to have a good end.
Another device used by the writer is metaphors such as ‘I gunned the engine.’ This is a violent
action and expresses that the writer is in a hurry and needs to escape from the dangerous
situation. The verb ‘gunned’ also makes the reader think that it has been a quick and instant
decision. ‘Walls of enemy waves’ also shows that the writer is being attacked by strong waves
and that the waves are very hard to defeat.
focus +
develops
comment
The writer also uses non-finite verbs, such as ‘howling – evil howling’ to show that the sound was
very scary and did not stop frightening him. He was threatened by something bad. Repetition of
the word ‘I’, shows that he was alone. He had no help and so he had to fight alone against the
monster.
Examiner’s comments:





Q4
All Band 2 criteria skills covered
Some Band 3 skills are beginning to be covered
Some development of comments
Good use of quotations
This answer was awarded 9 marks
Choose two of the three sources and compare the way that both texts use
presentational features for effect.
(12 marks)
presentation
feature
Both authors use various presentation devices, to convey the seriousness and attitudes of both
sources.
example
Firstly, source 1 displays a picture of the two siblings after the ordeal. The brother and sister are
both smiling for the camera meaning they are happy that they survived a 14 hour swim. They also
look very privaliged and surprised they have survived making them look as if they appreciate, life
more from there terrible experience. This conveys to the reader that they are very strong
develops into
characters and are somewhat role models for there efforts to survive.
Band 3 effect
Whereas, in source 2 the writer uses a picture of a man and women, preferably man and wife
displaying there eternal love for each others. I can infer this as the image shows a man blowing a
kiss, this conveys that the man cares about this women and is prepared to part from her so she
focus
83
can be brought to safety. The reader automatically gains a sense of sorrow and sympathy
towards the man as he is sacrificing himself for the love of his wife.
Band 3
develops
comment
example
Going back to source 1 the writer also uses colour connotations such as the use of the colours
grey black and white, Symbolising the tragedy of that time and displaying the mood swings that
the siblings must have faced when attacking this huge challenge. This makes the reader feel as if
they should feel sympathy towards the two survivors as they could have been horrific
attempts
repercussions to this trip.
comparison
Band 2
effect
Similarly the lifeboat source also uses colour connotations as the borders of source are golden
and very intrecatly designed, meaning that this source could possibly be evidence from the
shipwreck itself. It also uses black and white suggesting the source is very old and almost an
antique. This displays a huge feeling of importance to the reader as they begin to feel as if many
people on the ships moods were extremely dull and grey as they are aware of the disaster that
faces them.
presentational feature
clear
comparison
example
example
Tracking back to source 1 the bold title suggest that it is what is supposed to stand out the most
engaging the reader. ‘Brother and sister swim 14 hours for their lives after fishing boat sinks.’ This
highlights the extreme severaty of the ordeal in which the siblings have faced. This engages the
reader resulting in them reading the whole story because of the shocking reality of the title.
Band 2
effect
On the other hand source 2 has various titles which look very delicate and intricate. To be precise
the title ‘To the lifeboats’ has various patterns on its meaning in some way it could be
representing the darkness and seriousness of what is happening on the ship. This results in
making the reader feel extremely understanding of the depprasive mood in which the author is
trying is demonstrate.
comparing
throughout
Examiner’s Comments:
 Fulfills all Band 2 criteria plus some of the Band 3.
 Comments well on effects (Band 3)
 Compares clearly throughout.
 10 marks were awarded out of a possible 12.
Section B
Q5
Write a short piece of travel writing explaining how you coped with a
challenging journey.
Candidate 2
P
A
F
T
Explain
Anyone
Article
Formal
clear attempt to
plan
One of the most challenging journey’s I have ever been on is a hike to the tip of the Alps in
Europe. It took me and a group of extremely experienced hikers, two and three quarters days to
th
reach the summit of the tallest peak. We set out on our expedition on the 17 October 2013. It
was an amazing journey that I will remember for a lifetime.
accurate
sentence
demarcation
on task
Along the way we came across many challenging situations. The first was the wild bears at the
very bottom of the steep slopes. We hadn’t been informed as to what the bears didn’t like – we
steared away, we avoided them like the Plague! Despite our ‘careful’ decisions they caught up
with us, the only thing to do was a suggestion made by our Team Leader – Martin. He advised us
to make no eye contact with the wild beasts, they are giants. Everyone followed the rules set by
our skilled leader. We had overcome our first problem.
range of
paragraphs used
sentence variety
purpose
punctuation
84
clear
structure
vocabulary
Secondly we reached the midway point after 26 hours, the lack of oxygen was really starting to
get a hold of me, as if I was being strangled by the wind. To start with I already have asthma, but
this was possibly the worst I have ever felt with my breathing. Oxygen tanks had been left at the
base a third of the way down so we set up camp and enclosed as weary selves in the flimsy red
language
tents. Trying to restore our energy.
feature
feature
Finally after my body had seemed to have immunized to the lack of oxygen we had up in the
clouds, we were 1km off the summit. What a great feeling! I felt glorious, I knew this was a great
goal to achieve at my age. A huge avalanche started as strong winds picked up. We needed
shelter, fast. Trees were our only savior. Anxiously playing hide and seek with the summit, we
supposed ourselves. We had survived the avalanche … How did we possibly survive?
Examiner’s Comments:
AO3 I, iii:
 All Band 3 criteria covered.
 Clear sense of audience and purpose.
 Clear structure
 Attempts to engage the reader.
 Full marks awarded (10).
AO3 iii:
 All Band 3 criteria covered.
 6 marks out of 6.
Q6
structure
varies
structure
Write a magazine article persuading parents of the importance of teaching
children to swim.
Almost half of Britain’s children are unable to swim, is it parents fault?
feature
register
To all the parents out there who have children, can your child swim? This is a very serious case.
Studies have shown that a person is more likely to survive, if they come into difficulty by being
able to swim. Many parents out there don’t have all the time in the world to be teaching their
young to swim but it is extremely important. In the following article there will be some reasons that
your childs swimming is a MUST!
sentence demarcation
punctuation
purpose
register
Many parents think that swimming is just a hobby, but they are wrong. It’s one of life’s most
important skills and people really need to realise that. A lot of disasters that are in the news daily
that involve children are most commonly to do with them drowning. If the only know how to swim,
things like that wouldn’t happen. In our local bourough we have several swimming pools to teach
your young in; Highshead, Jumping Jacks, Hickstead and Lower Newton. These are some of the
best, and they are all free …
vocab
varied punctuation
feature
register
Do you really think it’s down to you? A lot of parents are totally in diniall about this subject. We
asked an Olympic swimmer from team GB on her opinion, she stated ‘Nearly half of British
children can’t swim – and it’s their parents’ fault.’ Clearly coming from a professional swimmer
she knows best. All you parents out there, get your children splish splashing around, it’s fun and
beneficial.
varied punctuation
I hope this article has really helped you in thinking about teaching your child to swim. It’s only
practice, practice, practice, once they’ve got it they’ve got it forever. It’s extremely important.
structure
Editor and writer
Image of 5 year old children
being taught to swim.
Enjoying themselves.
85
purpose
vocab
Examiner’s Comments:
AO3 i, ii:
 All Band 2 criteria covered
 Clear sense of purpose
 Clear and appropriate register
 Appropriate use of features for effect
 14 marks out of 16 were awarded for this response
AO3 iii:
 Band 2 response
 Appropriate use of Standard English
 Accurate sentence demarcation and a range of punctuation used
 7 marks were awarded
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Useful Websites
BBC Bitesize – www.bbc.co/bitesize
Sam Learning – www.samlearniong.com
I Am Learning – www.iamlearning.co.uk
Your school website
Geoff Barton (Headteacher and English teacher) – www.geoffbarton.co.uk
(Student resources)
Revision guide and youtube mini lessons - www.mrbruff.com and
www.youtube.com
Online newspapers or magazines – www.thegaurdian.co.uk,
www.thetimes.co.uk, www.theindependent.co.uk, www.bbcnews.co.uk
Examination Board website – www.aqa.co.uk (for information only)
Herts for Learning – www.hertsforlearning.co.uk/english
Spellzone - www.spellzone.com
Add your own and tell your teacher any recommendations.
If you follow these tips in your revision, you can reach
your target.
Good luck!
Produced by Herts for Learning English Team
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