Focus Area 1
Promoting resilience
Focus Area 1
Promoting
resilience
Focus area 1
Promoting resilience
Overview of the Promoting resilience focus area
This section provides an overview of the units included in the Promoting resilience focus
area and the content related to developing resilience-based skills in middle childhood
students.
The following units are included in the Promoting resilience focus
area:
Unit 1:1 Managing me
This unit focuses on naming emotions, being able to identify reasons for emotions and
practising calming and coping strategies. The key skills and attitudes that foster resilience
are addressed: helpful and positive thinking, planning ahead, reading emotions, seeking
help and courage.
Unit 1:2 Managing relationships and friends
This unit focuses on developing empathy and understanding another’s point of view and
managing the challenges of friendships. The key skills that are addressed are social
competence, assertive conflict resolution, group decision making and help seeking.
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
19
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
OVERVIEW OF CONTENT: PROMOTING RESILIENCE FOCUS AREA
This describes the content addressed in this focus area that will contribute to the achievement of the
Curriculum Framework Health and Physical Education Learning Outcomes in the context of drug education.
The content has been listed under the organisers from the Middle Childhood phase of the Curriculum
Framework Curriculum Guide – Health and Physical Education. The content for Attitudes and Values is
incorporated in the outcomes (shown in italics).
LINKS TO THE CURRICULUM FRAMEWORK CURRICULUM GUIDE – HEALTH AND PHYSICAL EDUCATION
Students should be taught:
PROMOTING
RESILIENCE
FOCUS AREA
KNOWLEDGE AND
UNDERSTANDINGS
SELF-MANAGEMENT SKILLS
INTERPERSONAL SKILLS
Unit 1:1
Managing me
PROMOTING WELLBEING
The meaning and dimensions of
health
Unit 2:1
Managing
relationships
and friends
• attitudes and behaviour of healthy
people
SELF UNDERSTANDING
Understanding emotions
• considering different ways of
expressing and managing emotions
• language to use to describe a range
and intensity of feelings
• using body cues and feedback from
peers and adults to recognise
intensity of feelings
• reading and taking into
consideration the feelings of others
• thought impacts on feelings,
attitudes and behaviours
RELATIONSHIP SKILLS
Communicating
• ways to establish communication in
groups e.g. use humour, introduce
people, engage others
• attitudes and actions that affect
health positively and negatively
Growth and development
• stress and feeling ‘out of control’
influences healthy growth and
development
• strategies to cope with difficult
emotions
Social-emotional wellbeing
• ways to support social-emotional
wellbeing such as helpful and
positive thinking, recognising and
managing difficult emotions in self
and others and developing courage
• a range of strategies that can
promote relationships e.g. resolving
conflict, making decisions, problem
solving, setting group goals
• relationships have aspects that vary
over time
Ways to keep healthier and safer
• ‘courageous’ behaviours and
situations that are potentially risky
or harmful
• ways to respond to conflict
situations with friends
• features of social environments that
enhance or pose threats to health
(e.g. caring classrooms, conflict
situations with friends)
Resources and consumer skills
• seeking help and opinions from
people they trust when dealing with
problems
Managing emotions
• modifying actions in response to
stressful or unsafe situations
• using both reactive and proactive
strategies to cope with intense
emotions (delete comma) e.g.
positive self talk, being resourceful,
goal setting, decision making,
seeking help
• how to recognise signs of intense
emotion or stress
DECISION-MAKING
Reviewing the situation
• ways to deal with a problem or
conflict with a friend
• how to identify positive and negative
consequences of different solutions
to a problem
• how to learn from mistakes
Planning before deciding
• elements to use when planning a
decision e.g. own and others’
attitudes, assessing how thoughts
and feelings are affecting planning
Deciding and acting
• strategies to monitor positive and
negative peer influences on
attitudes and behaviours, such as
self talk, seeking help, being
assertive
• some actions require persistence
Monitoring and evaluating
• being responsible for actions and
consequences of decisions
• being patient for rewards that may
not be immediate
20
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
• expressing needs, wants and
feelings appropriately
• practising ways to initiate and
maintain interactions
Building and nurturing relationships
• ways to show care and concern for
others and build friendships
• what to consider when being honest
and sincere with others
• the positive characteristics of a
friendship
• practising developing empathy
Preventing and managing conflict
• practising mediation strategies e.g.
suggest a compromise or
alternative
• ways to deal with the anger of other
people or resolve conflict between
friends
• ways to respond to teasing
WORKING WITH OTHERS
Cooperating and collaborating in
groups
• ways to contribute to group
cohesiveness and effectiveness
• what to consider when
communicating feelings of being left
out
• how to accept personal
responsibility for feelings and
actions in a group
Leading, initiating and facilitating
• ways to help others when they are
being harassed or are faced with
difficult situations
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
BACKGROUND INFORMATION
FOR THIS PROMOTING
RESILIENCE FOCUS AREA
➤ Resilience is the ability to ‘bounce back from
adversity’ in order to lead a healthy and fulfilling
life. The strengthening of social competencies,
emotional intelligence and resilience in young
people is associated with the prevention of
substance abuse, bullying, violence and suicide.
➤ Personal skills and attitudes that empower
young people to act resiliently are:
• helpful and positive thinking skills and attitudes
– e.g. normalising instead of personalising
stressful events, not catastrophising, using
positive self talk.
• resourcefulness – e.g. persistence, decision
making, problem solving and organisation skills.
• emotional intelligence – e.g. skills to recognise
and manage own emotions, skills for reading
and responding empathetically to others’
emotions.
• social skills – e.g. group, friendship, conflict
management and help-seeking skills.
• self-knowledge – e.g. skills of self-reflection,
skills for delaying gratification and managing
impulses, skills for developing confidence and
overcoming fears. 1
Throughout this resource, these skills and
attitudes are referred to as the ‘Five tools of
resilience’.
➤ Environments that promote resilience are those
that promote:
• school connectedness - achieved through
meaningful participation and contribution; high
but achievable expectations
• peer connectedness – achieved through
classroom cohesion, cooperative learning
strategies and peer support structures
• teacher connectedness – achieved through
classrooms that celebrate differences and set
clear boundaries, a cooperative classroom
culture, teachers who know and connect with
students in a personal way
• family connectedness – achieved through
expression of affection and support, good
communication, shared family values and
activities
➤ Further risk and protective factors for substance
use are outlined in the following tables.2 By
providing programs within the classroom and
school that can help students to identify, develop
and access the protective factors, the more likely it
is that students will become resilient.
PEER AND SCHOOL RISK AND PROTECTIVE
FACTORS FOR SUBSTANCE USE:
Risk
Protective
Academic failure
Opportunities and
rewards for positive
social involvement
Low commitment to
school
Realistic expectations by
teachers
Friends use of drugs
• community connectedness – achieved through
awareness of and access to support services,
involvement in clubs and teams, community
service, community pride and condoning of
antisocial behaviour. 1
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
21
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
FAMILY RISK AND PROTECTIVE FACTORS
FOR SUBSTANCE USE:
Risk
Protective
Poor family management
Family attachment
Negative
communication patterns
Opportunities and
rewards for positive
social involvement
Parental attitudes
favourable to drug
use and antisocial
behaviour
High but realistic family
expectations
Harsh or inconsistent
discipline
Extended family support
INDIVIDUAL RISK AND PROTECTIVE
FACTORS FOR SUBSTANCE USE:
Risk
Protective
Rebelliousness
Social skills and
competence
Early initiation of
drug use
Conflict resolution and
negotiation skills
Impulsiveness
Capacity for humour and
empathy
Interactions with
antisocial peers
Having an interest/hobby
Sensation seeking
Positive attachments
KEY TEACHING CONCEPTS
➤ The key skills and attitudes that contribute to
resilience and are emphasised in this focus area
are:
• helpful and positive thinking skills and attitudes
– by providing students with opportunities to
normalise instead of personalise stressful
events; use humour, develop a sense of
purpose and practise positive self talk.
• resourcefulness – by providing students with
opportunities to practise persistence, decision
making; goal setting; problem predicting;
problem solving and organisation skills.
• emotional intelligence – by providing students
with opportunities to recognise and manage
their own emotions and develop skills for
reading and responding empathetically to
others’ emotions.
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Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
• social skills – by providing students with
opportunities to practise group social skills;
manage challenges with friendships, peers and
others; and practise help-seeking and selfdisclosure skills.
• self-knowledge – by providing students with
opportunities to self-reflect, delay gratification
and manage impulses, develop confidence and
overcome fear of failing.
➤ These understandings and skills need to relate
to the students’ personal experiences and
students need many opportunities to rehearse
these skills (the scenarios provided in the learning
experiences may not be relevant to your
students). A reflection journal is a useful tool to
use after learning experiences as it allows
students to personalise their learning.
➤ When developing scenarios, be mindful that the
most common everyday stressors for middle
childhood students are:
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
peer relationships and teasing
competition with peers
homework
conflict with teacher
disappointment connected with sport and other
extra curricular activities
worry about tests and class presentations
balancing homework with home or extra
curricular demands
transition to high school
child/parent conflicts.1
➤ It is important to create a safe environment,
where students feel connected to both the teacher
and other students before conducting many of the
learning experiences in this focus area.
Remember to:
• avoid giving tasks that require students to
expose too much of their personal life or
feelings
• have a strongly enforced ‘no put down’ rule
• be aware that boys are less practised at self
disclosure than girls
• ‘protectively interrupt’ when necessary
• debrief all activities especially role-plays
• be aware of cultural differences.
➤ Involve parents in resilience education and give
families strategies to develop family
connectedness. The At-Home Activity Sheets aim
to increase parents’ understanding of resilience
and the protective factors that can create
resilience. Poor family management and family
conflict along with harsh or inconsistent discipline
are identified risk factors for substance use.
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
➤ It is suggested that learning experiences from
this focus area are undertaken with students
first as the social and emotional competencies
developed here are built upon in subsequent
focus areas in the resource.
If students have had no resilience education, it may
be appropriate to firstly use some of the experiences
from the Promoting resilience focus area in
Challenges and Choices: early childhood resource
for resilience, drug and road safety education (School
Drug Education and Road Aware, 2006) – this
resource was sent to all WA primary schools.
The following texts were used to prepare this information:
1
McGrath, H. and T. Noble, Bounce Back! A classroom
resiliency program: teacher’s handbook, Pearson Longman,
2003
2
Training Frontline workers: Young people, alcohol and other
drugs Young people at risk learners workbook, 2004,
Department of Health and Ageing, Canberra
Several of the learning experiences in the following two units were
adapted from:
McGrath, H. and T. Noble, Bounce Back!: teacher’s resource book:
level two middle primary, Pearson Longman, 2003
Fuller, A., B. Bellhouse, G. Johnston, The Heart Masters: middle to
senior primary, G & E Ridgeway, 2001
These resources may also complement the range of learning
experiences you provide your students.
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
23
Managing me
Unit 1:1 Managing me
For students:
Key understandings
➤
Resilience is the ability to ‘bounce back’ from harmful or adverse life events.
➤
There are five key skills that contribute towards the development of resilience
(helpful and positive thinking, planning ahead, reading emotions, seeking help and
courage).
➤
There are a range of reasons why we feel certain emotions and there are external
and internal body signals that tell us how we and others are feeling.
➤
Different people have different feelings and responses to a given situation.
➤
How we think about a situation determines how we feel and how we behave in this
situation.
Key skills
➤
Practise talking about and naming emotions with others.
➤
Practise identifying emotions in others.
➤
Practise using the ‘Five tools of resilience’.
TUNING IN
SHARED READING
➤ Oh the places you’ll go
Read ‘Oh the places you’ll go’ by Dr Seuss (Harper
Collins, 1957). This picture book provides an
excellent introduction into the notion that, while life is
full of joy and fun, it also involves overcoming
problems and obstacles. It is also suitable for older
students.
Discuss:
What pictures in the story show the ups and downs
of life?
What’s the book telling us about life?
What are some of the main problems/obstacles the
main character faces? (bad weather, scary things,
enemies, tiredness)
Does he/she give up or keep going?
What are some of the streets about which you might
say ‘I don’t choose to go there? (unkind acts, unsafe
activities, bullying, antisocial behaviour, taking drugs)
BEFORE AND AFTER
➤ Helpful and positive thinking skills
Photocopy Resource Sheet 1: Bouncing back and
distribute one to each student. This ‘before and after’
24
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
quiz will determine the extent to which students
already use helpful and positive thinking skills and will
highlight areas that need addressing with further
learning experiences.
Students complete the ‘before’ column now and the
‘after’ column at the completion of the focus area.
Discuss changes in thinking that may result.
GRAFFITI
➤ Different situations cause similar feelings
Prepare graffiti sheets labelled with the following
emotions: ‘worried’, ‘angry’, ‘jealous’, ‘scared’,
‘embarrassed’ and distribute one to each group.
(Students may need these emotions explained to
them if they have had no previous resilience
education).
Students answer the following three questions at their
graffiti sheet then circulate through the other sheets
and add additional comments: (Remind students not
to use real names or situations).
• What are some of the things that cause people
your age to feel like this?
• What are some of the signs a person’s body
feels or shows if they feel like this?
• What are some of the things a person your age
can do if they feel like this?
Unit 1:1 Managing me
Discuss:
Are these feelings unpleasant or pleasant feelings?
(unpleasant)
Discuss:
What did you notice about the results of the quiz?
(Most people have experienced unpleasant feelings
or problems).
Why do we have feelings? (They let us know when
things feel good or bad; they tell us when we need
to protect ourselves; they tell us when we need to
ask for help; they tell us when we need to solve
problems or make decisions).
Why might some people think they are the only
ones who have these feelings? (If people don’t
share how they feel with others, they may think they
are the only ones who feel like this).
Why is it important to be in control or be ‘boss’ of
our feelings? (So we don’t hurt others and their
feelings, so we don’t hurt ourselves).
Do these feelings or problems ever last for ever?
(Mostly we bounce back from these unhappy
feelings and if we can’t, we should always talk to
someone about how we are feeling).
Can we sometimes get feelings confused? (Yes,
sometimes our bodies feel very similar when we
are ‘scared’ to when we are ‘angry’ - discuss body
symptoms of these two emotions and other
emotions that may be confused e.g. ‘excited’ and
‘nervous’, ‘lonely’ and ‘sad’, ‘jealous’ and ‘hurt’).
Students write down the strategies they would most
likely use to stay ‘boss’ of these feelings in their
journal.
QUIZ
➤ Everyone has problems quiz
Using ‘yes’, ‘no’ and ‘maybe’ flash cards, students
answer the following questions using the card they
feel most appropriately answers the question. Allow
time between questions for students to give
examples.
Have you ever felt embarrassed by something
someone said or did at school?
Have you ever felt disappointed when something
you were looking forward to was cancelled?
Have you ever felt hurt when a friend has said
something mean to you?
Have you ever felt nervous when you’ve started
something new and not known anyone?
Have you ever felt angry when you’ve been
blamed for something that was not your fault?
Have you ever felt frustrated when you’ve tried
really hard to do something but not been able to
do it?
Have you ever felt lonely when everyone seems
to have someone else to play with and you have
no one?
Who could you talk to if any of these feelings didn’t
go away? (e.g. parents, grandparents, teacher,
friends, siblings).
VALUES VOTING
➤ Different people feel differently about the
same situation
Using a ‘fist of five’ voting system where five fingers
means ‘very’ and a fist means ‘not at all’, students
vote how they would feel in the following scenarios
using the appropriate number of fingers to
communicate their response.
For some students, the emotions may need to be
explained first. After each question, ask different
students for their reasons.
• If you forgot it was ‘free dress day’ and came to
school in uniform, how embarrassed would you
feel?
• If you were expecting to go on a camping trip
and it got cancelled because of bad weather,
how disappointed would you feel?
• If you had to make a speech at assembly, how
nervous would you feel?
• If your Mum didn’t arrive to pick you up from
school when she said she would, how worried
would you feel?
• If you had lots of homework and knew you
wouldn’t get home from sports training until
really late, how stressed would you feel?
• If your best friend told you he/she wanted to
play with some other kids today, how sad would
you feel?
• If a classmate accidentally broke a new game
or toy you’d brought to school, how angry
would you feel?
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
25
Unit 1:1 Managing me
Stress that different people can feel differently about
the same situation and discuss the reasons for this.
Students can create their own situations to continue
the voting further.
FINDING OUT
Note: it is useful to conduct the following learning
experiences in the order that they appear as they
logically introduce the ‘Five tools of resilience’.
POW WOW
➤ Talking about resilience
Conduct a pow wow using the following questions
(see Tuning In in the Teaching and Learning
Strategies p 273):
Introduce the ‘Five tools of resilience’ and explain
each skill. (Use large photocopied sheet of Resource
Sheet 2: Five tools of resilience):
• Helpful and positive thinking
• Planning ahead
• Reading emotions
• Seeking help
• Courage
Photocopy Resource Sheet 3: I understand resilience
and distribute one sheet to each student. Students
think of a person they know who displays each of
these skills and explain why in the box provided. They
then fill out their resilience goals. Follow up this goal
on a one-to-one basis throughout the focus area.
HEAD TALK
➤ Helpful and positive thinking
• When have you had to wait and wait for
something you really wanted?
• When have you done something that you were
really scared about doing but you did it
anyway?
• When have you had to keep trying to get better
at something?
• How do YOU know when YOU are worried/
scared/angry?
• Who is the person you are most likely to talk to if
you are worried/scared/angry?
• What is one good way for someone to stop
themselves from thinking bad or sad things?
• Tell about someone who has bounced back from
something bad or sad. (no names)
Explain that all these situations had something to do
with ‘resilience’ and ask students to guess what
resilience might be about.
Explain to students that they are focussing on the first
resilience skill, ‘helpful and unhelpful thinking skills’
and that how we think about a situation affects how
we feel and how we act. The key to coping with
problems or difficult situations is sometimes just in the
way we think about them.
Read out the following situations and show an
enlarged photocopy of Resource Sheet 4: Helpful
and unhelpful thinking:
I forgot to bring my bathers for school swimming
lessons.
I read an announcement at assembly and made a
few mistakes with my reading.
I didn’t get into the sports team/music group.
I didn’t get invited to one of my classmate’s party
and lots of other people in my class did.
Explain that ‘resilience’ is the ability to bounce back
from problems or harmful events and that just like
learning to read and write, we can learn to be resilient
by practising some simple skills. These skills need to
be practised every day even when we are adults.
Explain that ‘helpful’ thinking is thinking that helps us
feel better, calmer and more hopeful about things and
is usually based on real facts. ‘Unhelpful’ thinking
makes us feel more upset and hopeless and is based
on guessing, panicking and exaggerating.
Explain that it may help to think of resilience as a
toolkit that we keep with us at all times. This toolkit
contains the important skills that help us to become
resilient. In different situations throughout our lives we
need to pull out different ‘tools’ or skills to help us get
through problems or difficult situations.
Younger children may prefer to refer to ‘unhelpful’
thinking as ‘shark’ thoughts and ‘helpful’ thinking as
‘dolphin’ thoughts. (See further explanation and
resource sheets on p 295, 302 and 303).
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Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
Ask students to give examples of both ‘helpful’ and
‘unhelpful’ thinking for each situation above using the
resource sheet for ideas. Ensure that students
understand all aspects of this resource sheet by
giving examples of these types of thoughts.
Unit 1:1 Managing me
Photocopy Resource Sheet 5: Thinking cards and
distribute one cut up set to each group. Conduct a
modified head talk where a number is called out and
the student with that number chooses a card and
responds with an example of either ‘helpful’ or
‘unhelpful’ thinking as stated on their card.
Conduct a ‘letterbox survey’ on ‘Positive ways to
manage the feeling of…..’ and assign a survey box to
each emotion. Once voting is completed, give one
survey box to each group to collate responses. It may
be necessary to give an example of how to manage
each emotion before commencing.
JIGSAW
Students collate their findings and record them on
graffiti sheets with their emotion clearly marked at the
top of the sheet. Students do a graffiti walk around
the classroom to see all findings.
➤ Planning ahead
Explain to students that they are focussing on the
second resilience skill, ‘planning ahead’ and that each
group will be looking at a specific aspect of this one
big skill. It may be necessary to explain the terms
‘goal setting’, ‘being resourceful’, ‘persistence’ and
‘self discipline’ on the jigsaw sheet before
commencing.
Photocopy and enlarge Resource Sheet 6: Planning
ahead jigsaw and distribute one to each group.
Assign a discussion topic to each group. Students
need to record their own findings so that when they
move to a jigsaw group they can share this
information.
Findings from the jigsaw group are recorded on the
large copy of Resource Sheet 6: Planning ahead
jigsaw.
SURVEY
➤ Reading emotions
Explain to students that they are focussing on the
third resilience skill, ‘reading emotions’ and that it is
important to understand our own emotions or feelings
and be able to name these feelings, but also
important to be able to read these emotions in other
people. Being able to read other people’s emotions
helps us get along with others better.
Brainstorm a situation where someone their age may
feel: (no names and be prepared to ‘protectively’
interrupt)
• embarrassed
• ashamed
• rejected
• angry
• disappointed
• bored
• nervous
• sad
• frightened
Discuss
What does… (use each emotion)… look like,
sound like and feel like?
Discuss :
Will these positive ways work in every situation?
(No, it depends on the circumstances but what
you say to yourself and do in these situations can
help you.)
What emotion do you think is the hardest to
manage or be ‘boss’ of? Why?
What emotion do you think is the hardest to read
in other people? Why?
CIRCLE TALK
➤ Seeking help
Explain to students that they are focussing on the
fourth resilience skill, ‘seeking help’. This skill involves
being able to go to someone to get a reality check
when you are worried or have a problem. There are
two parts to this skill:
• being able to find the right person to talk to about
the problem.
• being able to tell this person how you are feeling.
Conduct a circle talk using the following statements:
(stress that more than one person may be
appropriate for each situation).
If I was worried about getting my homework
finished on time I would probably talk to …..
In this situation I would say…..
If I was upset because a friend was being mean
to me, I would probably talk to….
In this situation I would say…..
If I was disappointed that I didn’t get picked for a
sporting side/school play, I would probably talk to…
In this situation I would say…..
If I was unhappy about things happening in my
family, I would probably talk to …
In this situation I would say…..
If I was nervous about speaking at a school
assembly, I would probably talk to …
In this situation I would say…..
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
27
Unit 1:1 Managing me
Discuss:
Why is it helpful to talk to people if you have a
problem or are feeling unhappy? (These people
can help us do a reality check on our problem –
are we exaggerating, panicking, mind reading?
We also feel supported, safer and cared for when
we share a problem).
Give some examples before students commence:
Think about the positives.
Take one step at a time.
Remember that lots of people have done it and
lived through it before you.
Have faith in your own abilities.
Remember that it’s OK to make mistakes.
Who are some of the people we could talk to if
we had a problem? (e.g. parents, grandparents,
teacher, friends, siblings).
Talk to people who have faith in you.
Do we talk to the same person for every
problem? (No, different problems often require
that we talk to different people).
Discuss:
EIGHT SQUARES
➤ Courage
Explain to students that they are focussing on the fifth
resilience skill, ‘courage’. Explain that everyone has
fears and that students (especially boys) should not
pretend that they are fearless and that nothing upsets
them.
Explain that courage is about overcoming fears and
doing something that we would rather not do because
it is too difficult, scary or painful. Stress that each
time we overcome a fear we get braver and more
confident. Having the skills to deal with a scary
situation usually makes it less scary.
What were some of the most common ‘how to be
brave’ suggestions in our class?
Do we all get frightened by the same things? (No,
we are all scared by different things and brave
about other things. We usually feel more scared
when we don’t have the skills to do something.)
Is foolhardiness or thrill seeking the same as
courage? (Being foolhardy is a dangerous form of
courage. The risk of harm is usually high and
skills and experience are usually lacking e.g.
taking some one else’s medicine, riding a
skateboard down a hill without a helmet.)
Why is it important to stop and think before you
decide to do something courageous? (We might
do something foolhardy, something we don’t have
the skills or experience to deal with e.g. rescuing
someone who is drowning, dealing with a house
fire.)
Brainstorm:
• Different kinds of courage (Consider courage to
be yourself or stand up for yourself, courage to
do things that scare you, courage to stand up
for someone or something you believe in,
courage to bounce back when things go wrong,
courage to do something you may fail at). How
does your body feel when you are
scared/nervous/frightened?
• Does it feel good to be able to manage or be
‘boss’ of these emotions?
• What things do people say to themselves or do
to make them feel more brave? (‘This isn’t
going to kill me’, ‘It doesn’t matter if I can’t do
this, At least I’m having a try’, ‘You can do it!’)
Students complete an eight squares sheet collecting
ideas on ‘how to be brave’. They must fill in eight
squares with eight different strategies. If someone
they talk to suggests something that is already on
their sheet, they need to put a tick or the person’s
initial next to that suggestion, so that common
strategies can be identified.
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Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
SORTING OUT
ARTS IDEAS
➤ Fridge magnets, bag tags or posters
Students make a fridge magnet, a bag tag or a poster
using a computer publishing program that illustrates
one of the ‘Five tools of resilience’.
➤ Jigsaws
Each student draws or paints a picture depicting all or
one of the ‘Five tools of resilience’ on firm card.
Students mark and cut out jigsaw shapes on their
picture and share their puzzle with other students.
➤ Paper chains
Students spend time each day reflecting on the ‘Five
tools of resilience’ and, where appropriate, record
onto coloured strips of paper one example of where
they have used any of these skills in their daily life.
The strip is added to their own personal ‘Chain of
resilience’ paper chain. Every few days individual
students can share their achievements with the class
or a small group.
Unit 1:1 Managing me
➤ Puppets
Students make glove or stick puppets from
photocopies of images of people in magazines.
Students use the puppets to develop stories to
illustrate the ‘Five tools of resilience’. For example:
• Scenarios that depict the use of unhelpful thinking
and resulting behaviour could be compared with the
same scenario using helpful thinking and a more
positive resulting behaviour.
• Traditional children’s stories (Three little pigs,
Hansel and Gretel, Jack and the beanstalk) can be
retold with the narrator stressing where the
characters have set goals, shown persistence, been
resourceful.
• Scenarios can be developed to illustrate a character
managing a difficult emotion by using some of the
coping strategies developed in the ‘survey’ learning
experience on p 27.
• Puppets can depict characters from a favourite
television program finding the right person to talk to
about a problem and expressing how they feel to
that person.
• Scenarios that depict ‘everyday’ courage being
used to overcome fear can be narrated to explain
how the main character is thinking and feeling at
each stage of the scene.
Discuss:
How do we feel when we are angry?
Do you think it’s easy to think and act normally
when we have these feelings? (No, that is why we
need to cool down or control these feelings before
we do anything).
Can angry feelings be useful? (Sometimes they
warn us that something wrong or unfair has been
done to us).
Are there different types of angry? (Like many
emotions there are levels of intensity e.g. annoyed,
cross, angry, furious. Discuss situations that may
result in these different levels of intensity).
Why is it important to be ‘boss’ of our angry
feelings? (We could hurt or offend others, hurt
ourselves, feel bad about ourselves afterwards,
feel guilty afterwards, get into trouble or be
punished).
What does being ‘boss’ of anger looks like/sounds
like/feels like/ thinks like?
Students make a flow chart or similar information
sequence titled Being boss of my anger looks like,
sounds like, feels like and thinks like and record
examples under each of these four categories.
T AND Y CHARTS
PUZZLES AND GAMES
➤ Feelings ramble
Photocopy Resource Sheet 7: Emotions and cut up
and stick one emotion on each student’s back.
Students need to guess the emotion on their back by
asking other students questions that elicit only a ‘yes’
or ‘no’ answer.
Brainstorm some possible questions: ‘Is it a pleasant
emotion?’, ‘Would my mouth go dry?’, ’Would I feel it
at a scary movie?’ When each student has guessed
their emotion, they take the card off their back and
then help other students guess theirs.
Resource Sheet 7: Emotions can be used for a range
of different learning experiences.
SEQUENCING INFORMATION
➤ Managing anger sounds, looks, feels and
thinks like
Review some of the suggestions on ‘Positive ways to
manage anger’ suggested in the ‘survey’ on p 27.
➤ Dealing with difficult emotions
Give each group one of the difficult emotion cards
from Resource Sheet 7: Emotions. Photocopy and cut
up Resource Sheet 8: Dealing with difficult emotions
and give each group a set.
Using a T chart, students sort the cards into ‘Good’
and ‘Not so good’ ways to deal with the emotion on
their card.
Allow students to circulate between groups to see
that different emotions require different responses
and that some ways were repeatedly ‘Good’ and
some repeatedly ‘Not so good’ despite the different
emotions.
Students use consensus to determine the three best
ways to deal with their emotion. Report finding to
whole class and follow up with one of the written
tasks below.
Discuss:
Do you think you’d need practice at calming yourself down when you have these difficult emotions?
Which calming thoughts are you going to try to
practise?
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
29
Unit 1:1 Managing me
WRITTEN RESPONSES
➤ Lucky dip
Students choose two cards from a lucky dip box
consisting of the cut up emotions on Resource Sheet
7: Emotions. They discuss with a partner the
situations that may cause these emotions; how they
can be identified in the body; and how they can be
managed.
Students then write a story that involves both of these
emotions.
➤ Flip books
Students write and illustrate flip books for younger
students (or make several class books with each
student contributing several pages) that focus on one
of the ‘Five tools of resilience’. For example:
I know I’m angry when I feel…(then give bodily
response to this emotion) – substitute emotions
A good way to be ‘boss’ of angry feelings is to…
Persistent means….(students relate a short
incident)
Self-disciplined means…(students relate a short
incident)
Resourceful means… (students relate a short
incident)
When I feel…. because….I talk to…. and tell
them how I am feeling
The most scared/frightened/nervous I ever felt
was…(students relate a short incident)
A good way to be brave is to….
The second one needs to show the character using
unhelpful thinking (developed in ‘head talk’ on p 26
and show perhaps a not so positive ending.
Encourage students to consider both thoughts and
actions that their character can use. This could be
developed using Microsoft Photostory (free download)
or completed as a written task.
DEVELOPING VALUES
CHOOSE A CORNER
➤ Sharing attitudes about the ‘Five tools of
resilience’
Using the ‘choose a corner’ strategy, and the
discussion required to process this strategy, gives
students the opportunity to share their attitudes about
any of the ‘Five tools of resilience’. Students can
make up their own scenarios. The following scenarios
and statements have been included as examples to
develop discussion around the ‘Five tools of
resilience’.
Helpful and positive thinking
Tai had an argument at lunch time with his best
mate Ben. Ben has been ignoring him all
afternoon. The best helpful and positive thinking
idea for Tai in this situation would be:
1. Ben must just need a bit of cooling off time
2. Ben’s not talking to me so maybe I could go
and talk to these guys over here
3. friends always have disagreements.
Everything will be cool tomorrow
4. I think I need to talk to Ben about how I am
feeling.
➤ Research report
Planning ahead
Students research a person who has bounced back
from a disabling condition or stressful circumstances.
Share the results of their research with another class
or in a library display.
A self-discipline goal that I would be most likely to
achieve would be:
1. going to bed an hour earlier and reading
2. eating two pieces of fruit a day
3. watching TV for an hour less each day
4. getting 30 minutes exercise a day.
➤ Helpful and positive thinking
and courage comic strips
Brainstorm situations where students may feel
nervous, anxious or frightened. Students choose one
of these situations or one of their own and draw two
story comic strips with four cells each.
The first one needs to show the character using
helpful and positive thinking skills (developed in ‘head
talk’ on p 26) or strategies ‘to be brave’ (developed in
‘eight square’ on p 28) and show a positive ending.
30
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
The most resourceful thing to do if Mum didn’t
arrive when she said she would to pick you up
from sports training, would be:
1. wait for a bit longer and hope she turns up
2. ask to use an adult’s mobile phone and call
her or another adult
3. ask a friend if you can get a lift with him/her
4. walk home by yourself.
Unit 1:1 Managing me
Reading emotions
Discuss:
Meg got angry when her older brother Callum
said she couldn’t change the channel to a TV
show she wanted to watch. The best way for her
to deal with her anger would be to:
Does our opinion of what is courageous change
as we get older? Why? (As we experience more
things and overcome more fears we become
more confident).
1. Count to ten slowly.
Can you think of any things you missed out on
doing when you were younger because you felt
scared that you might look silly or make a
mistake?
2. Go and play with her dog.
3. Talk to her Mum about why she wants to
watch the show.
4. Talk to Callum about why she wants to watch
the show.
Seeking help
Tessa was feeling sick at school and thought
something was wrong with her. If I was Tessa, the
person who I would go and tell how I was feeling
would be:
What are some of the things you would say to
yourself in some of these situations to overcome
your fear?
Are boys more or less likely than girls to do
foolhardy or risky things? (Boys may feel more
influenced by their friends to impress and show
off in front of them).
MAKING DECISIONS
1. My best friend.
2. My teacher.
BRAVE TALK
3. Someone in the front office.
➤ Practising helpful and positive thinking and
seeking help
4. The principal.
Courage
The thing that I would find the most scary would
be:
1. Singing by myself at assembly.
2. Going to a new school where I didn’t know
anyone.
3. Abseiling down a cliff.
4. Sticking up for someone who was being
picked on.
VALUES CONTINUUM
➤ Exploring courage further
Photocopy and cut up Resource Sheet 9: Foolhardy
or courageous? Distribute one card from the resource
sheet to each student and using a ‘foolhardy’ to ‘very
courageous’ continuum, and the processing questions
required to process this strategy well, conduct a
values continuum. The term ‘foolhardy’ may need to
be explained (something that has a high level of
danger and a low level of skills, safety procedures
and purpose).
Explain that courage is usually measured by the level
of risk and the quality of the purpose.
Photocopy and cut up Resource Sheet 10: Dealing
with problems and distribute one to each group.
Students answer the two questions on their card:
• What helpful or positive thought could make this
situation better?
• Who could you talk to about this if you needed
to?
Rotate the cards through several groups so that
students get to practise in a range of situations.
Students could role-play their helpful or positive
thoughts and their help-seeking behaviours.
ROLE-PLAY
➤ Practising using ‘Five tools
of resilience’
Students form pairs and develop a scenario where
someone their age may feel worried or scared.
Considering all the ‘Five tools of resilience’ they
develop a list of ‘tools’ or strategies from the
resilience toolkit that could help the person in their
scenario.
Students role-play their scenario using their chosen
strategies. They may have to develop several
versions of their role-play to practise using all the
strategies identified. Perform the role-play twice so
that each student has the opportunity to practise
using the strategies they have identified.
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
31
Unit 1:1 Managing me
Discuss:
How does practising these problem-solving
activities in the classroom help you deal with real
worries and problems in your life?
What have you practised today that might help
you make your own decisions when you are
worried or scared?
PLANNING
➤ Setting class or group goals
Brainstorm some goals students could achieve as a
class or in groups. Encourage goals that foster
interaction with other members of the school
community. Help students plan and evaluate the
progress towards achieving their goal and highlight
the need to resourcefully solve problems.
Possible ideas for group goal setting.
➤ Setting individual goals
• Cook and sell food and donate the money
raised to a charity or class reward.
Photocopy Resource Sheet 11: My short-term goal
and distribute one to each student.
• Run a mini fete at lunch time and donate money
to a charity or class reward.
• Paint a mural on a dull wall in the school.
Explain that it is useful to have goals to help us get
what we want, to feel successful and be confident
and to become more resourceful. Like all of the ‘tools
of resilience’, goal setting is a skill that needs to be
practised. They will be practising achieving a shortterm goal (within four to six weeks).
Discuss the need to be persistent and patient; the
need to break goals down into small chunks and the
importance of focussing on one’s strengths.
• Conduct a lunchtime Battle of the Bands.
• Make something for the pre-school (cubby,
doll’s house, road signs).
• Run a lunch time activities session (Scrabble,
cards, bocce).
• Develop new playground activities (paint four
square and hopscotch templates).
• Develop and promote a safer traffic
management program around the school.
Using a ‘think-pair-share’, students develop examples
of the following short-term goals:
• Independence goal: e.g. make own lunch
everyday
• Health goal: e.g. eat five vegetables each day
• Self-discipline goal: e.g. read a book a week
• Social goal: e.g. invite a classmate home
• Relationship goal: e.g. play with younger
brother/sister after school each day
SPEAKING OUT
MUSICAL PAIR SHARE
➤ Talking about the ‘Five tools of resilience’
This strategy can be used to promote discussion
before or after any of the Finding out and Sorting out
learning experiences above. Here are some
suggestions:
• Knowledge goal: e.g. improve spelling, learn
tables
Helpful and positive thinking
• Financial goal: e.g. save for a specific item
What’s one thing you can say to yourself when
you are scared?
Students choose a goal from this list that they would
like to achieve and then complete the resource sheet.
Revisit the goals each week to check progress.
Celebrate successes and encourage students to help
others who may be struggling to achieve their goals.
Students complete the reflection section of the
resource sheet when their goal has been achieved or
at the end of their stated time period.
32
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
What’s one thing you can think or do to be ‘boss’
of angry feelings?
What’s one thing you can say to yourself when
you make an embarrassing mistake?
What’s one thing you can say to yourself when
your friend ignores you or is mean to you?
Tell someone about a time when you’ve worried
about something and it never happened.
Unit 1:1 Managing me
Planning ahead
CHOOK HOUSE SPEECHES
One thing I found hard to do this week but I tried
and didn’t give up was…
➤ Making arguments that support one of the
‘Five tools of resilience’ (suitable for older
students)
One goal I have for next week is….
Three things I do if I’m bored at home are…
One thing I used will power for this week was…
One interesting mistake I have made this week
is…
Reading emotions
What does it feel like when you are angry?
What does it feel like when you are scared?
What does it feel like when you are
embarrassed?
What does it feel like when you are lonely?
Ask students to choose from one of the following
quotes and consider all the ‘tools of resilience’. Allow
them about 10 minutes to discuss their chosen quote
with their peers. Using the information they collect
from their peers, and any other information they have
gained from previous learning experiences, students
prepare a two minute talk to explain how this quote
refers to or supports the ‘tools or resilience’.
Practice chook house speeches and then choose
several names from a hat to ‘perform’ their final
speech.
Possible topics:
One situation where what I was thinking made me
feel angry was ….(use other emotions)
Few things are terminal. What looks like the end
of the road will usually turn out to be a bend.
How can you tell when someone else is feeling
angry/scared/embarrassed/lonely?
A fall in the ditch makes you wiser. (Chinese
proverb)
Seeking help
The ultimate measure of a person is not where
they stand at times of comfort and convenience
but where they stand at times of conflict and
controversy. (Martin Luther King Jnr.)
Someone I would talk to if I was worried at
school/home/at a friend’s place would be…
Being able to talk about your problems is good
because….
If we don’t ask for help or talk to someone else
when we are worried or upset we might….
Courage
The scariest thing I could ever be asked to do
would be…
Courage is not the absence of fear but the
judgement that something else is more important
than fear. (Ambrose Redmoon)
If you can stay calm in a moment of anger, you
will save yourself hours and days of sorrow.
(Chinese proverb)
Some things you can say to yourself or do to be
brave if you feel scared are…
Anyone can be angry. That is easy. But to be
angry with the right person, to the right degree, at
the right time, for the right purpose and in the
right way – that is not easy. (Aristotle)
Some relaxing thoughts you can have at night to
help you go to sleep if you are scared or worried
are…
Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine
percent perspiration. (Thomas Edison)
I think the bravest person I have ever heard of
is….
A setback is an opportunity to begin again more
intelligently. (Henry Ford)
He who risks and fails can be forgiven. He who
never risks and never fails is a failure in his whole
being. (Paul Tillich)
A dream is just a dream. A goal is a dream with a
plan and a deadline. (Harvey Mackay)
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
33
Unit 1:1 Managing me
REFLECTING
SIMULATED
JOURNALS
INTERACTIVE CD ROM AND WEBSITES
➤ Personal reflection on the ‘Five tools of
resilience’
➤ Playing with what we have learnt
Many of the learning experiences in this focus area
incorporate self reflection questions. Students can
record their reflections on the different learning
experiences in a journal. Also encourage them to
record examples of when they have bounced back
from small problems on a daily basis.
Some possible triggers are:
• An example of helpful thinking that I have used
this week is…
• The last time I coped well with a problem was….
• What helped me cope well was…
• The one tool of resilience that I could probably
work on is…because….
REAL-WORLD
PARENT INFORMATION AND AT-HOME
ACTIVITY
➤ Raising resilient kids
Photocopy the At-Home Activity Sheet 1: Raising
resilient kids and encourage students to share it with
their family or distribute it at an information evening.
This sheet provides a rationale for doing resilience
education in the classroom/school and gives parents
some tips on encouraging resilience in their children.
34
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
Students access www.headroom.net.au/cubby and
complete the interactive activities under ‘problem
solving’ and ‘feelings’.
REPLICATING THE REAL WORLD
➤ Reading emotions in others
Give students emotion cards from Resource Sheet 7:
Emotions and ask them to report back after lunch if
they have observed any of these emotions (no
names). Encourage students to discuss what they
saw and heard that lead them to believe that the
person concerned was feeling a particular emotion.
Unit 1:1
Resource Sheet
1
Bouncing back
Read each statement
and tick the box in
the ‘Agree’ or the
‘Disagree’ column to
show how you think.
Your teacher will tell
you whether to use
the ‘Before’ columns
or the ‘After’ columns.
Statement
Before
Agree
Disagree
Agree
After
Disagree
If you make a mistake it’s usually because
you are dumb or stupid.
When something bad has happened to
someone, it’s usually that person’s fault.
In most bad situations, if you think about
good things you often feel better.
Sometimes you can’t change things that
you don’t like.
Telling someone how you feel when you
have a problem is easy.
Some people never have any problems.
Getting angry with others when you don’t
get your own way is OK.
Asking someone you are having a problem
with how they really feel or think about it is
a waste of time.
Mistakes are necessary if you are learning
something new.
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
35
Unit 1:1
Resource Sheet
2
Five tools of resilience
Helpful and positive thinking –
using brave talk (dolphin thoughts),
using humour, thinking ‘what’s wrong
with this situation?’ not ‘what’s wrong
with me?’ or ‘why me?’
Seeking help – knowing who to
talk to when you have problems
or difficult emotions, knowing
how and when to tell someone
how you are feeling.
Courage – developing
the habit of overcoming
fear and of behaving
fairly and thoughtfully.
Reading emotions – being able
to control your feelings and your
behaviour, being able to read
other peoples’ feelings so you can
get along with them.
36
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
Planning ahead –
developing self-discipline,
setting goals, being
persistent, being
resourceful.
Unit 1:1
Resource Sheet
3
I understand resilience
We all know people who use the skills of resilience every day. Think of
each of the ‘Five tools of resilience’ and give an example of where you or
someone you know has shown a skill which utilises this tool.
• Helpful and positive thinking – using brave talk (dolphin
thoughts), using humour, thinking ‘what’s wrong with this
situation?’ not ‘what’s wrong with me?’ or ‘why me?’
• Planning ahead – developing self-discipline, setting
goals, being persistent, being resourceful.
• Reading emotions – being able to control your feelings
and your behaviour, being able to read other peoples’
feelings so you can get along with them.
• Seeking help – knowing who to talk to when you have
problems or difficult emotions, knowing how and when to
tell someone how you are feeling.
• Courage – developing the habit of overcoming fear and of
behaving fairly and thoughtfully.
• A resilience skill I would like to improve is:
• The things I could do to practise this skill are:
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
37
Unit 1:1
Resource Sheet
4
Helpful and unhelpful thinking
Helpful thinking
Accepts that
everyone makes
mistakes – it’s
normal.
Everybody
makes
mistakes
2+2=5
Concentrates on
the funny or
good bits in a
problem.
Accepts that unhappy or
bad things happen to
everyone – not just you
(i.e. normalises things).
Accepts the things
you can’t change in a
problem.
Focuses on future
abilities to solve the
problem.
Understands if
something bad happens
once, it might not ever
happen again.
Does a reality check to
work out the likelihood
of something really
happening.
Accepts that you
sometimes need to talk
to others to get the facts
about a situation.
38
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
Unhelpful thinking
Believes mistakes
and failures mean
you are dumb or
stupid.
Just focuses on
the bad bits in a
problem.
Believes that bad things
happen to just you
because you are you (i.e.
personalises things).
Does not accept the
things you can’t
change.
Tries to go back and
undo something that
has already happened.
Thinks that if something
bad has happened
once, it will happen
again and again.
Exaggerates the problem
and thinks about the worst
thing that could happen and
assumes it will happen.
Focuses on ‘mind reading’
how people are feeling
and thinking in a situation
instead of asking them.
Unit 1:1
Resource Sheet
5
Thinking cards
✁
You don’t understand
what you are meant to
do for homework and
it’s due in tomorrow.
You overhear two
of your classmates
whispering about
you.
What unhelpful
thinking might make
you feel worse?
What helpful
thinking might make
you feel better?
✁
You are not picked to
go to the interschool
swimming carnival
although you thought
you would.
Your teacher
shouted at you
when he was angry.
What unhelpful
thinking might make
you feel worse?
What helpful thinking
might make you feel better?
What unhelpful thinking
might make you feel worse?
You are moving to a
new school and
don’t know anyone.
What unhelpful
thinking might make
you feel worse?
Dad said you couldn’t go
to a sleepover that all
your friends are going
to because you had to
go to a family BBQ.
What helpful thinking might
make you feel better?
✁
You have had so much
homework this week that
you haven’t done the
music practice your
teacher expects
you to do.
What helpful
thinking might make
you feel better?
✁
What
unhelpful
thinking might
make you feel
worse?
You have to make a
speech in front of the
whole school and
you are nervous.
✁
Your classmate beat you in a maths
test and you usually always beat him.
You are moving to
high school next
year and feel
nervous about it.
What helpful
thinking might make
you feel better?
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
39
Unit 1:1
Resource Sheet
6
Planning ahead jigsaw
1. Goal setting
2. Being resourceful
•
•
•
•
• What does ‘being resourceful’ mean?
• What do you need to do when plans or
goals don’t work out as you thought they
would?
• Give some examples of how you could be
resourceful if you:
- missed the bus to school
- became lost in the bush
- became lost in a shopping centre
- became bored at home and couldn’t
watch TV or play computer games.
What is a goal?
How is it different from a wish or a dream?
Why is it useful to have goals?
Give two examples of:
- a sporting goal
- a family goal
- a health goal
- an independence goal.
• How can other people help you try to achieve
your goal?
3. Persistence
4. Self discipline
• What does persistence mean?
• How do you feel if you give up on
something that was important to you?
• Does persistence always pay off?
• Give some examples of how persistence
could help you:
- learn to play an instrument
- make new friends
- complete a big project.
• What is self-discipline or will power?
• Why is it sometimes hard to use selfdiscipline?
• Give some examples of how self-discipline
could help you:
- become a better athlete
- eat healthy food
- wait for
something
you really want.
40
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
Unit 1:1
Resource Sheet
7
Emotions
✁
DETERMINED
DISAPPOINTED
EMBARRASSED
EXCITED
FRIGHTENED
FRUSTRATED
GUILTY
GRUMPY
HURT
HAPPY
IMPATIENT
IRRITATED
JEALOUS
LONELY
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
41
✁
CONFIDENT
✁
CALM
✁
BRAVE
✁
BORED
✁
ANGRY
✁
✁
✁
AFRAID
Unit 1:1
Resource Sheet
cont.
Emotions
✁
✁
✁
✁
7
LEFT OUT
MISUNDERSTOOD
MISERABLE
OPTIMISTIC
PANICKY
PROUD
RELIEVED
REJECTED
SATISFIED
SCARED
TIMID
TEARFUL
UNHAPPY
USED
UNEASY
WORRIED
✁
✁
✁
✁
42
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
Unit 1:1
Resource Sheet
8
Dealing with difficult emotions
Calmly tell the person
that caused me to feel
this way how I feel.
Make a joke.
Cuddle a toy or pet.
Make a plan of what I
could do.
Yell and shout.
Kick
something.
Walk away and be alone
for a while.
Remind myself not to do
anything that may wreck
a friendship.
Pretend I don’t really feel
like this.
Breathe
deeply.
Count to 10 slowly.
Try hard to see the other
person’s point of view if
this feeling involves
someone else.
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
43
Unit 1:1
Resource Sheet
Dealing with difficult emotions
cont.
Hit someone.
Cry a lot.
Listen to
music.
Talk to someone else
about how I feel.
Say rotten things to myself.
Talk to no-one.
Throw
something.
Think
about my
good
points.
Tell myself
that I feel
like this
because
I’m stupid.
Get a reality
check from
someone
else not
involved
in the
situation.
Tell myself
that no-one
else ever
feels like
this.
Wait for a while
so I can think
about what I
could do.
44
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
8
Unit 1:1
Resource Sheet
9
Foolhardy or courageous?
✁
✁
✁
Stealing for a
dare.
Smoking a cigarette
for a dare.
Riding a skateboard
without a helmet.
Performing in front
of the whole school.
Admitting you
have made a
mistake.
Speaking up for
someone who is
being bullied.
Getting a radical
haircut.
Travelling by yourself
on a plane for the
first time.
Wearing an
embarrassing fancy
dress outfit.
Working with others
you don’t know in a
group activity.
Going on a roller
coaster.
Asking someone
for direction if you
are lost.
Continuing a long
running event
after you have fallen
over.
Having a sleepover
for the first time at
someone’s house.
Saying ‘no’ to
something that
everyone else is doing
because you know it is
harmful or risky.
Going into
hospital to have
your tonsils out.
Starting a fight with
someone much
bigger than you.
Making a difficult
decision.
Asking the principal
for help with
something that is
worrying you.
Asking your teacher
for help with
something that is
worrying you.
Trying again at
something you failed
at before.
Admitting to your
parents that you
told a lie.
Giving blood for the
first time.
Speaking up for
yourself when you are
being unfairly treated.
✁
✁
✁
✁
✁
✁
✁
45
✁
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
Unit 1:1
Resource Sheet
10
Dealing with problems
✁
✁
The principal asks you to come to
his office during class time.
You get lost in a shopping centre
you have never been to before.
• What helpful or positive thought
could make this situation better?
• What helpful or positive thought
could make this situation better?
• Who could you talk to about this
if you needed to?
• Who could you talk to about this if
you needed to?
You have to do group work with
some kids you hardly ever talk to.
You have too much homework to
finish in one night and you are
worried your teacher will be angry
with you.
✁
• What helpful or positive thought
could make this situation better?
• Who could you talk to about this
if you needed to?
• What helpful or positive thought
could make this situation better?
• Who could you talk to about this if
you needed to?
✁
You have to catch a bus to high
school for the first time.
• What helpful or positive thought
could make this situation better?
Your friends are all playing a game
but when you ask to join in they
say you can’t play because there
are too many people already.
• Who could you talk to about this
if you needed to?
• What helpful or positive thought
could make this situation better?
• Who could you talk to about this if
you needed to?
✁
You have left your hat at home
and it’s No Hat, No Play.
You get dropped a grade from your
netball/football team.
• What helpful or positive thought
could make this situation better?
• What helpful or positive thought
could make this situation better?
• Who could you talk to about this
if you needed to?
• Who could you talk to about this if
you needed to?
✁
46
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
Unit 1:1
Resource Sheet
10
cont.
Dealing with problems
✁
• What helpful or positive thought
could make this situation better?
• What helpful or positive thought
could make this situation better?
• Who could you talk to about this if
you needed to?
• Who could you talk to about this if
you needed to?
Your parents won’t let you go
skateboarding after school because
they think it’s too dangerous.
Your family tells you that you
can’t go on an outing or holiday
that you’ve been looking forward
to for ages.
• Who could you talk to about this if
you needed to?
• What helpful or positive thought
could make this situation better?
• Who could you talk to about this if
you needed to?
You really want something badly
but your parents say you have to
wait until your birthday which is 10
months away.
Your Dad calls and says he can’t
see you on the weekend.
• What helpful or positive thought
could make this situation better?
• Who could you talk to about this if
you needed to?
✁
• What helpful or positive thought
could make this situation better?
✁
Your teacher tells you off for
something you haven’t done.
✁
Most of your classmates have been
invited to a party and you haven’t.
• What helpful or positive thought
could make this situation better?
• Who could you talk to about this if
you needed to?
✁
Your best friend sends you a mean
text message on your mobile
phone.
• What helpful or positive thought
could make this situation better?
• Who could you talk to about this if
you needed to?
47
✁
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
Unit 1:1
Resource Sheet
My short term goal
Name:
Date:
•
What do you want to achieve?
•
When do you want to achieve it by?
•
Why do you want to achieve it?
•
What do you think it will take for you to achieve your goal?
•
Why is this a realistic goal?
•
What or who might help you when things get tough?
Your signature:
Teacher’s signature:
Parent/family member’s signature
Reflection:
Were there any problems you had trying to achieve your goal?
How did you overcome – or try to overcome – these problems?
Did you make any mistakes? If so, did you learn from your mistakes?
If you achieved your goal, how do you feel?
If you did not achieve your goal, how do you feel?
48
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
11
Raising resilient kids
Unit 1:1
At Home Activity Sheet
1
Dear family
We have been learning about resilience.
Resilience is the ability to ‘bounce back from
adversity’ in order to lead a healthy and full life.
It is associated with the prevention of substance
abuse, bullying, violence and suicide in young
people.
To help us learn about resilience we have been
talking about the ‘Five tools (or skills) of
resilience’ that we need in our toolkit at all
times to help us through everyday problems
and to help us communicate well with other
people. You can help your child to understand
these skills and to become more resilient.
The Five tools of resilience are:
• Helpful and positive thinking – using
positive self talk, using humour, thinking
‘what’s wrong with this situation?’ not ‘what’s
wrong with me?’ or ‘why me?’
• Planning ahead – developing self-discipline,
setting goals, being persistent, being
resourceful.
• Reading emotions – being able to control
your feelings and your behaviour, being able
to read other peoples’ feelings so you can get
along with them.
• Seeking help – knowing who and when to
talk to someone when you have problems or
difficult emotions, knowing how to tell
someone how you are feeling.
• Courage – overcoming fear and behaving
fairly and thoughtfully.
Ways to help your child develop these
skills:
• Helpful and positive thinking – encourage
your child to:
– look on the bright side of things
– laugh at their mistakes
– not exaggerate problems or jump to
conclusions.
• Planning ahead
– encourage your child to practise stopping
when excited
– encourage your child to think before they
do something
– praise your child when they stick at
something even when the going gets tough
– praise your child when they are resourceful
and solve problems in tricky situations
– help your child predict difficult situations
and plan pleasant events.
• Reading emotions
– express your feelings to your child and
encourage them to do the same to you
– help your child identify situations that make
them feel angry, distressed or anxious
– talk about ways of dealing with these
feelings and reading these feelings in other
people.
• Seeking help
– encourage your child to talk to you about
their problems
– be reassuring and talk about alternative
solutions to problems
– remember to give your child a break when
upset and allow them time to seek refuge
in a quiet place if they need it.
• Courage
– praise your child when they have done
things you know are outside their comfort
zone
– encourage your child for trying even if they
have not succeeded
– encourage your child to speak up for
themselves in tricky situations
– encourage diverse interests
– celebrate milestones.
Together we can help raise happy and confident
children.
Classroom teacher
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
49
Managing friends
Unit 1:2 Managing relationships and friends
For students:
Key understandings
➤
Attributes of friends and sociable people.
➤
There is a range of social skills which need to be learnt in order to get along with
people.
➤
Conflict is a part of friendship and there is a range of ways to resolve it.
Key skills
➤
Practise ways to resolve conflict.
➤
Practise engaging in collaborative and supportive activities.
➤
Practise help-seeking and help-giving.
TUNING IN
CARD CLUSTERS
➤ Getting along with people
Explain to students that they need to give an
imaginary new student some advice on how to get
along with people in the class. Conduct a card cluster
with every student writing down two behaviours that
would help this person get along with others and two
behaviours that would not help.
Discuss:
Why is it good to get along with people? (To feel
included, to make friends, to feel good about
yourself, to have fun).
Students make posters of this information in
groups and display them around the class and
school.
Collate findings under the headings ‘things that help
people get along with others’ and ‘things that don’t
help people get along with others’ and encourage
students to record their own version of this
information for future learning experiences.
Some suggestions are:
Things that help people
get along with others
Things that don’t help people
get along with others
Be positive.
Be grumpy.
Include others.
Be bossy.
Respect others opinions and ideas.
Be selfish and want things just your way.
Be a good listener.
Ignore people or talk over them.
Be a good winner and loser.
Be a bad winner or loser.
Cooperate and be flexible.
Boast and brag.
Tell interesting stories.
Ramble on with long, boring stories.
Be kind and caring.
Talk about yourself all the time.
Find something you have in common with others.
Tell people off when they make mistakes.
Offer to help people or share your things.
Be too private and not share how you think or feel.
50
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
Unit 1:2 Managing relationships and friends
BEFORE AND AFTER
➤ My ‘getting on with people’ ranking
Photocopy Resource Sheet 1: My getting on with
people ranking and distribute one to each student.
This modified ‘before and after’ quiz will determine
students self assessed social skills and highlight
areas that need addressing with further learning
experiences.
Students complete the quiz before they engage in
any learning experiences and then complete it again
at the end of the term or at the completion of the
resilience program. Discuss changes in thinking that
may result.
GRAFFITI
How can you be a friend to yourself? (Give yourself
credit for good things you do; be kind to yourself
when you make mistakes; look after yourself with
healthy food, rest and exercise; never give up on
things; have the courage to try new things).
Students write in their journal three qualities that
make them a good friend and one quality they could
improve on to be a good friend.
FINDING OUT
CIRCLE TALK
➤ Introducing friendship problems
Conduct a circle talk using the following questions:
➤ Elaborating on skills for getting along with
people
• What are the main problems that can happen in
a friendship?
Prepare graffiti sheets labelled with the following
questions and distribute one to each group:
• Why do friendships sometimes break up?
• What makes an effective listener?
• What makes a good winner and a good loser?
• What makes an interesting conversation?
Students answer the graffiti sheet then circulate
through the other sheets and add additional
comments. (Remind students not to use real names
or situations).
Students write in their journal three things they could
practise this week with regards to these skills.
VALUES CONTINUUM
➤ Qualities of a friend
Photocopy Resource Sheet 2: Qualities of a friend
and cut up and distribute one set to each group.
Using a values continuum of ‘very important’ to ‘least
important’ and the questions required to process this
strategy well, students consider:
How important is this quality or behaviour (on the
card) to being a good friend?
Students give reasons for their placement and
hear others’ opinion on the same quality or
behaviour.
Discuss:
Why are friends important?
What things help you to make friends?
• How can people your age make up after a fight
with a friend?
• Do friends always agree on everything? What
might they disagree about?
• How do people feel when their friendships have
problems?
• Why do some people become nasty and loud
when they are disagreeing?
• Are there any positive things about having a
disagreement?
Ensure that discussion has focussed on the fact that:
• all friendships have problems from time to time that
need to be sorted out
• when handled well, dealing with conflict can make
us more confident and happy and also make a
friendship stronger
• using skills to sort out solutions to conflict often
avoids fights
• even if fights occur, we can still fix things up and
build bridges to keep a friendship.
HEAD TALK
➤ Dealing with disagreements
Photocopy Resource Sheet 3: Dealing with
disagreements and distribute one to each student.
Brainstorm words or phrases associated with
‘argument’ or ‘disagreement’. Decide whether these
words or phrases are positive or negative.
Can people be bad friends?
Why is it important to be a good friend to yourself?
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
51
Unit 1:2 Managing relationships and friends
Explain that a fight is different to a disagreement and
usually happens when things haven’t been sorted out
properly and someone feels angry or hurt.
Empathy looks like
Empathy sounds like
Hugging someone when
they are hurt.
I’m sorry you hurt
yourself.
Explain that the resource sheet shows three different
ways of dealing with disagreements:
Laughing with someone
when they are happy.
You must be so
excited.
• Bulldog (Aggressive): only interested in winning an
argument; not worried about hurting other’s
feelings; threatens or hurts to get own way.
Doing something kind for
someone who is sad.
I hope you feel
happy again soon.
Clapping when someone
has done something
great.
I’m so happy for you.
• Panda (Assertive): stays calm and tries to sort out
argument with solutions where both people win;
says sorry when in the wrong; asks for help to sort
things out; says what he/she thinks or feels without
getting angry.
• Mouse (Passive): is scared of arguments and often
pretends they are just not happening; gives in too
easily in arguments because he/she fears being
disliked or shouted at.
Draw a Y chart to explain what Bulldog, Panda and
Mouse ways of dealing with a disagreement would
‘look like’, ‘sound like’ and ‘feel like’.
Note: For older students it may be more appropriate
to use the terms Aggressive, Assertive and
Passive as ways of dealing with a conflict
rather than using the animals suggested
above.
In groups, students decide which way the
disagreements in the scenarios on the resource sheet
are solved and conduct a head talk to hear
responses.
Students write in their journals:
Next time I disagree with someone I will try to …..
STREAMLINE
➤ Understanding empathy
Ask students to tell a partner in one minute about a
happy, sad or frightening incident they can remember
without actually saying how they felt in this situation.
The partner then tries to guess how this student must
have been feeling in this situation. Swap roles.
Explain that ‘showing empathy’ means letting
someone know you understand how they feel and
that you care. Make a T chart of what empathy
‘sounds like’ and ‘looks’ like’ to explain this skill
further:
Give each group a scenario and conduct a streamline
strategy where each student thinks about their
scenario and writes:
• three sentences to describe what that person
might be thinking or feeling
• three things they could say or do to show
empathy towards this person.
Students then share their responses with a partner
and choose the best three responses for each
category. Share findings as a whole class or continue
to streamline with another pair of students.
Possible scenarios:
Your best friend hates performing in front of
people and has to play at a school assembly
tomorrow.
A new person arrives in your class and has noone to play with at recess.
A classmate just finds out that her Mum and Dad
are getting divorced.
A classmate often looks lonely in the playground.
A classmate trips and falls in front of the whole
class.
A classmate’s family pet was run over on the
weekend.
A classmate you don’t know very well gets teased
a lot in the playground.
Discuss:
How do you think showing empathy might help
avoid disagreements? (You can see both sides to
a situation; being kind to someone who is angry
or upset ‘cools’ down these hot emotions).
Do you think if all students showed more
empathy there would be less teasing or bullying
in our school? Why? (If we think that we are
walking in someone else’s shoes, we are less
likely to be mean to that person).
What helpful and positive thinking could each of
these people use to help them feel better?
52
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
Unit 1:2 Managing relationships and friends
PLACEMAT
➤ Solving disagreements posters
➤ Understanding help-seeking
Students make posters that summarise the Panda or
assertive way of resolving conflict. Display around the
room and remind students to look at particular
posters if potential conflicts arise in the classroom.
Explain to students that sometimes there are
situations that involve disagreements or potential
disagreements where it is safer to ask for help from
an adult or a friend than try to sort it out themselves
e.g. where someone may get injured or hurt, where
something illegal is being suggested, where they feel
too frightened to be assertive.
Brainstorm who could help in different scenarios e.g.
teacher, parent, canteen staff, cross walk attendant,
school office staff, older siblings, older friend,
neighbours, police.
Give each group a scenario and a placemat sheet.
Each student thinks about their scenario and writes
what they would do in this situation and who they
could get help from.
Students share and place the best or the most
common suggestions in the centre circle of the
placemat. Share findings as a whole class activity.
Possible scenarios:
A Year five student is losing his temper with some
boys over a game on the oval. He has started
punching a boy near you and you are worried he
may hit you next.
A friend is getting angry with you because you
don’t want to go into the deli and shop lift some
lollies.
➤ Puppets
Students make glove or stick puppets from
photocopies of images of people in magazines.
Students use the puppets to develop stories that
show friends, parents and children, teachers and
students dealing with disagreements like a Panda or
in an assertive way.
Students could write situations where they have
previously had a disagreement with someone and
explain the situation, making sure they avoid naming
people. The scenarios could be problem-solved using
the puppets.
PUZZLES AND GAMES
➤ ‘Getting along with people’ board game
Students design and make a ‘getting along with
people’ board game incorporating the skills and
attitudes from the ‘things that help and don’t help
people get along with others’ list developed in the
‘card cluster’ on p 50.
Students could also make up hypothetical
disagreements and friendship problems that players
have to deal with or solve appropriately before they
can move on in the game.
Your friend often sends you really nasty MSN
comments if you’ve had a disagreement at
school. You wish he/she would talk to you about
how they feel instead.
Games could be played with other classes or younger
students.
You are at basketball training and your coach is
getting very angry with you because you keep
mucking up a drill. His shouting is frightening you.
➤ Managing disagreements
A classmate you don’t know very well is getting
bullied by other students in the playground.
SORTING OUT
ARTS IDEAS
➤ Friendship paper dolls or posters
Students make friendship paper doll chains with each
doll representing one of their five most important
qualities in a friend. The same information can be
portrayed in a poster or by using Microsoft Photostory
(free download) to create a story map.
SEQUENCING INFORMATION
Review some of the suggestions on what Bulldog
(Aggressive), Panda (Assertive) and Mouse (Passive)
ways of dealing with a disagreement would ‘look like’,
‘sound like’ and ‘feel like’ (from the ‘head talk’ learning
experience on p 51).
Students develop a flow chart from disagreement to
resolution. For example:
a negative outcome: disagreement ➜ argument ➜
fight ➜ cooling off time ➜ friends again
or a more positive outcome: disagreement ➜ sorting
out a solution ➜ friends again.
The flow chart can be presented as a cartoon strip
with speech and thought bubbles.
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
53
Unit 1:2 Managing relationships and friends
Students share their flow charts with a partner and
the partner must guess whether a Bulldog, Panda or
Mouse (or aggressive, assertive or passive) way of
dealing with the disagreement has been portrayed.
Students could role-play the scenarios from these
flow charts afterwards.
Alternatively, students can develop two flow charts,
one showing an effective way to deal with their
disagreement and another showing an ineffective
way.
➤ Choose your own ending story
Students write a story about a person their age who
has a disagreement with a friend, a parent or a
teacher. The story needs to have two different
endings – one where the young person doesn’t
handle the disagreement well and one where he/she
does.
Stories can be hand written or presented as a
PowerPoint presentation to be shared with other
students.
WRITTEN RESPONSES
➤ My thoughts
➤ Walk a day in my shoes
Students take a digital photo of their partner. Make a
gallery of the whole class using these photos.
Students write a speech or thought bubble on post-it
notes relating to one of the following:
Buy three interesting pairs of shoes from an op shop.
Discuss the possible life stories of the people who
may have worn the shoes.
• The three qualities I really like in a friend are…
In groups students decide on a possible
disagreement that each of the characters may have
with someone.
• Next time I have a disagreement with someone
I will try to…
Individually they need to choose a character and write
a story as though they were that character, describing
how they feel in the disagreement and how they
would deal with it.
DEVELOPING VALUES
CHOOSE A CORNER
Students share their stories and discuss different
ways the characters used to deal with their situation.
➤ Sharing attitudes about dealing with
disagreements
Discuss:
What was it like to get inside the head of someone
else and walk in their shoes?
• The best way to get on with people is to…
Students can make up their own scenarios and give a
range of options. The following scenarios and
statements have been included as examples:
Would you have handled the disagreement
differently to the way your character did? How?
Mack has been waiting in the canteen line for
ages and someone pushes in front of him. The
best way to deal with this situation would be to:
Do you think your character would be a good
friend? Why? Why not?
1. ask the person firmly to please go to the back
of the line
Why is it important to be able to understand how
someone else may be feeling in a disagreement?
(Having empathy helps avoid conflict and keeps
friendships strong).
2. ignore the person and not get worried about it
➤ Flip books
Students write and illustrate flip books for younger
students (or make several class books with each
student contributing several pages) that focus on one
useful way to get along with people (developed in the
‘card clusters’ on p 50).
3. thump the person in the back
4. tell the teacher on duty once he has been
served.
Ian notices that some of his classmates often
leave him out of games. The best way to deal
with this situation would be to:
1. say in a positive friendly voice, ‘Come on guys,
how about giving me a go?’
2. find some other friends to hang around with
3. talk to his teacher about it
4. think of some other games to play with these
classmates and ask them if they want to play.
54
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
Unit 1:2 Managing relationships and friends
Tamsin and Bec are playing with a netball. A
couple of boys from their class keep grabbing the
ball and kicking it to the other end of the netball
court. The girls are getting angry with this. The
best way to deal with this situation would be to:
1. ask them firmly and politely to stop doing it
2. go and find the teacher on duty
3. hit them in the head with the netball
4. just give the boys the netball and play
something else.
Discuss:
How did it feel to role-play the situation that may
have ended a friendship?
How did it feel to role-play the situation would
keep the friendship going?
How does practising these problem solving
activities in the classroom help you deal with real
conflicts and problems in your life?
What have you practised today that might help
you make your own decisions when you are
involved in a disagreement with someone?
MAKING DECISIONS
DECISION-MAKING MODEL
➤ Making decisions about situations
that involve conflict or making
friends
Photocopy Resource Sheet 4: Dealing with other
people and give one scenario and one photocopied
Decision-making model (available in Making
decisions p 307) to each student.
Model the decision-making process with one scenario
and then ask students to discuss the options and
consequences with other students who have their
particular scenario. Students need to imagine that
they are the character in the scenario and write what
they would do in this situation at the bottom of the
Decision-making model resource sheet.
Allow time for students to share the options and
consequences of other groups’ scenarios.
ROLE-PLAY
➤ Practising sorting out conflict
Students write and post into a box, conflict situations
that they would like to have resolved (remember no
real names if using real situations). Check the
situation for appropriateness and then distribute to
pairs.
In pairs, students prepare two role-plays – one with
an outcome that would be likely to maintain a
friendship and one with an outcome that is more likely
to end a friendship.
Students conduct their role-plays and then swap roles
to understand empathy for another’s feelings.
SPEAKING OUT
VOX POP INTERVIEWS
➤ Talking about friendships
Students make a video about the key qualities of
good friendships and tips for working together well
with others in groups. They can interview younger
students, parents and teachers to illustrate that the
qualities we look for in a friend may vary over time
and that skills for getting along with people are
needed throughout our lives.
Show the videos to younger students or have them
playing in the library at lunch times.
CHOOK HOUSE SPEECHES
➤ Making arguments that support
attributes of friendship or skills of
empathy and conflict resolution
(Suitable for older students)
Ask students to choose from one of the following
quotes and consider the skills or attributes of
friendship, empathy or conflict resolution discussed in
class.
Allow them about 10 minutes to discuss their chosen
quote with their peers. Using the information they
collect from their peers and any other information
they have gained from previous learning experiences,
students prepare a two minute talk explaining how
this quote refers to or supports what they have learnt.
Conduct the practice chook talks and then choose
several names from a hat to ‘perform’ their final
speech.
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
55
Unit 1:2 Managing relationships and friends
Possible topics:
SIMULATED
“In order to have friends you must first be one.”
(Elbert Hubbard)
“People will forget what you said. People will
forget what you do. But people will never forget
how you made them feel.” (Anon.)
“You have no right to an opinion for which you do
not fully understand the opposing argument.”
(John Stuart Mill)
“My long experience has taught me to resolve
conflict by raising the issues before I or others
burn their boats.” (Alistair Grant)
REFLECTING
REFLECTIVE QUESTIONS
➤ Personal reflection on friendship
and conflict resolution
Many of the learning experiences in this focus area
incorporate self-reflection questions. Students can
record their reflections on the different learning
experiences in a journal. Also encourage them to
record examples of when they have been a good
friend or resolved conflict effectively.
Some possible triggers are:
In what ways have you been a good friend this
week?
When was the last time you coped well with a
disagreement?
What helped you cope well?
What ‘getting along with people skill’ do you think
you need to work on and why?
REAL-WORLD
PARENT INFORMATION AND
AT-HOME ACTIVITY
➤ Raising resilient kids
Photocopy the At-Home Activity Sheet 1: Getting
along with others and encourage students to share it
with their family or distribute it at an information
evening.
56
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
INTERACTIVE CD ROM AND WEBSITES
➤ Playing with what we have learnt
Students access www.headroom.net.au/cubby and
complete the interactive activities under ‘friendship’.
REPLICATING THE REAL WORLD
➤ Sort it out mat
Set aside a comfortable area of the classroom with
bean bags and some privacy, if possible, and display
students’ posters of assertive ways to resolve
disagreements (see Arts Ideas on p 53). If
disagreements occur during class, ask students to go
to this area and practise sorting things out using the
assertive conflict-resolution skills they have learnt.
Teacher may act as a mediator if conflicts can not be
resolved.
➤ Fostering friendship groups outside the
classroom
Encourage friendships outside the classroom with
strategies such as buddy class reading and writing;
lunch time activity or games groups organised by
older students; setting up student-based committees
such as assembly committee, health committee,
library committee, sports committee or newsletter
committee.
➤ Celebrate good social skills
Encourage students to nominate classmates who
have displayed good social skills. Students write their
nominations and reasons why and post them in a
voting box. Once a week a name is drawn from the
voting box and this student’s good social skills are
celebrated. For example: being positive, being a good
listener, being a good loser or winner, cooperating
and being flexible, being kind and caring, being loyal.
Unit 1:2
Resource Sheet
1
My getting on with people ranking
Tick the column that you think best describes you for each statement below.
I do this most
I do this
of the time
sometimes
I hardly
ever do this
Am kind and caring to other kids.
Make my stories interesting.
Talk about positive things more than
negative things.
Am a good listener.
Am a good winner and loser.
Start a game and ask others to join in.
Talk to people at school I don’t know
very well.
Sort out fights without getting angry.
Listen to other kids’ ideas and do what
they want to sometimes.
Make other kids laugh without making
fun of anyone.
What ‘getting along with others’
skills do you think you need to
practise?
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
57
Unit 1:2
Resource Sheet
2
Qualities of a friend
✁
✁
✁
Sticks up for me if
I’m being hassled
or bullied.
Shares thoughts
and feelings with
me.
Likes the same
things that I do.
Is good at sport.
Has a similar
culture or religion
to me.
Is good at school
work.
Makes me
laugh.
Is popular
with other kids.
Includes me in
things.
Is a good winner
and loser.
Is positive and
usually happy.
Is kind and caring.
Forgives me
if I make
mistakes.
Buys me good
presents.
Is good
looking.
✁
Wears fashionable
clothes.
✁
Is a good listener.
✁
Likes me even if
I’m in a bad mood.
✁
✁
✁
58
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
Unit 1:2
Resource Sheet
3
Dealing with disagreements
A Bulldog:
➤ is only interested in winning an argument
➤ is not worried about hurting other’s feelings
➤ threatens or hurts to get own way.
A Panda:
➤ is calm and tries to sort out an argument with
solutions where both people win
➤ says sorry when he/she is in the wrong
➤ asks for help to sort things out
➤ says what he/she thinks or feels without getting
angry.
A Mouse:
➤ is scared of arguments and often pretends they
are just not happening
➤ gives in too easily in arguments because he/she
is scared of being disliked or shouted at.
How do these people sort out their disagreements?
• Ella gives some of her favourite magazines to Sharni to read. When Sharni returns them they are
torn and dirty. Ella is very upset but doesn’t say or do anything.
Ella’s way of dealing with this disagreement is
• Kieran wants to play basketball at lunch time but Sam wants to play four square. Kieran decides it’s
not worth getting upset about and says, ‘OK, why don’t we play four square now and then play
basketball at lunch time tomorrow?’
Kieran’s way of dealing with this disagreement is
• Mitch misses out on getting to sit in the back seat of the bus and is annoyed. He grabs Troy and pulls
him out of the seat and says ‘Get out of there you loser.’
Mitch’s way of dealing with this disagreement is
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
59
Unit 1:2
Resource Sheet
4
Dealing with other people
✁
✁
Roxy and her friends are asked to pack up all
the sporting equipment after the sports
carnival. Roxy feels like her friends are just
mucking around and she is doing all the work
and it’s making her angry.
What could she do and say?
Whenever Tim goes over to Joe’s place to
play computer games Joe just hogs the
controls, plays only the games he wants
and often tells Tim he is hopeless at the
computer games.
This makes Tim
angry. What
could he do
and say?
George’s younger sister always goes into
his CD collection when her friends come
over and takes his CDs. He wouldn’t get so
angry with her if she put them back in their
correct covers and kept them tidy, but she
leaves them in a
mess every time.
What could he
do and say?
Brad’s friends often pick on Max because
he is not very good at sport. Brad feels
sorry for Max but is a bit scared about
speaking up for him. What could he do
and say?
A new girl at school has started being friendly
with Milly. Milly quite likes her but all Milly’s
friends say she is a loser and they don’t want
her to join their group.
What could she do
and say?
Tran always does
her homework but
her friend Silvy
never does. Silvy
always asks Tran
if she can copy
her homework so
she doesn’t get
into trouble for
not doing it. This
is starting to
annoy Tran.
What could she
do and say?
✁
✁
✁
60
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
Getting along with others
Unit 1:2
At Home Activity Sheet
1
Dear family
We have been learning about resilience.
Resilience is the ability to ‘bounce back
from adversity’ in order to lead a healthy
and full life. It is associated with the
prevention of substance abuse, bullying,
violence and suicide in young people.
Well-developed social skills can help
young people act resiliently. We have
been learning about social skills that are
important if we want to get along with
others:
➤ being positive
➤ being a good listener
➤ being a good winner and loser
➤ cooperating and being flexible
➤ being loyal
➤ being kind and caring.
We know that people are not born with
these skills but have to learn and practise
them. We know that if you can get along
with people, you have a sense of
belonging and feel happier and more
confident.
We have discussed that there are aggressive
(or Bulldog) and passive (or Mouse) ways to
deal with conflict that are not always as
effective as being assertive.
Ask your child to tell you about the Panda,
Bulldog and Mouse ways of dealing with
conflict.
How you can help your child with these
social skills:
➤ give compliments and praise when your
child displays any of the social skills
outlined above
➤ try to model the social skills outlined
above yourself
We have also been learning that handling
conflict well is an important skill for getting
along with people and that having
disagreements with friends is normal. We
have been practising dealing with
disagreements in an assertive (or Panda)
way which involves:
➤ encourage your child and other family
members to deal with disagreements in
an assertive way rather than an
aggressive or passive way
➤ staying calm and trying to sort out
argument with solutions where both
people win
➤ get to know your child’s friends (without
being intrusive).
➤ saying sorry if you have been unfair or
done something wrong
➤ have consistent rules about behaviour in
your family
➤ avoid being too harsh with your discipline
Together we can help raise happy and
confident children.
➤ asking for help to sort things out
➤ saying what you think or feel without
getting angry.
Classroom teacher
Focus Area 1: Promoting resilience
61