German writing
Level 1/2 Certificate (IGCSE)
Exemplar student marked work
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Contents
Student 1
Student 1 Script
Student 1 commentary
Page
4
5
Student 2
Student 2 Script
Student 2 commentary
6
7
Student 3
Student 3 Script
Student 3 commentary
8
9
Student 4
Student 4 Script
Student 4 commentary
10-11
12
Student 5
Student 5 Script
Student 5 commentary
13-14
15
Student 6
Student 6 Script
Student 6 commentary
16-17
18
Student 7
Student 7 Script
Student 7 commentary
19-20
21
Student 8
Student 8 Script
Student 8 commentary
22-23
24
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Student 9
Student 9 Script
Student 9 commentary
25-26
27
Student 10
Student 10 Script
Student 10 commentary
28
29
Student 11
Student 11 Script
Student 11 commentary
30-31
32
Student 12
Student 12 Script
Student 12 commentary
33-34
35
Student 13
Student 13 Script
Student 13 commentary
36-37
38
Student 14
Student 14 Script
Student 14 commentary
39-40
41
Student 15
Student 15 Script
Student 15 commentary
42-43
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Student 1 Foundation Tier Question 1
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Student 1 Foundation Tier Question 1
Commentary on Student’s Script
Question 1a
Communication
The student was awarded full marks on this question.
Question 1b
Communication
Inaccurate, but existing, verb form of an appropriate verb is acceptable on this question. There are
two verbs here and it is considered that this conveys meaning without ambiguity.
Question 1c
Communication
The student was awarded full marks on this question.
Question 1d
Communication
Past tense is acceptable on this question/at this level.
Question 1e
Communication
No ambiguity despite inappropriate preposition.
Total: 10 marks
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Student 2 Foundation Tier Question 1
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Student 2 Foundation Tier Question 1
Commentary on Student’s Script
Question 1a
Communication
The student was awarded full marks on this question.
Question 1b
Communication
Not well expressed but intended meaning clear and verb form correct.
Question 1c
Communication
Does not convey intended meaning because of use of ‘bringe’. Not close enough to suitable verb
to score 1.
Question 1d
Communication
Correct verb – wrong [but existing] ending is not considered to prevent clear conveying of meaning.
No penalty for use of the English D , because other appropriate subject information given German.
Question 1e
Communication
The student was awarded full marks on this question.
Total: 8 marks
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Student 3 Foundation Tier Question 1
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Student 3 Foundation Tier Question 1
Commentary on Student’s Script
Question 1a
Communication
The student was awarded full marks on this question.
Question 1b
Communication
The student was awarded full marks on this question.
Question 1c
Communication
Intended meaning conveyed despite absence of preposition.
Question 1d
Communication
As ‘lerner’ is not an existing verb form, this can only be awarded 1 mark.
Question 1e
Communication
The student was awarded full marks on this question.
Total: 9 marks
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Student 4 – Foundation Tier Question 2a/ Higher Tier Question 1a
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Student 4 Foundation Tier Question 2a/ Higher Tier Question 1a
Commentary on Student’s Script
Content 10/12
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86 words – so just within the guidance.
The student expressly attempts to respond to both parts of the question, though the
first strand (re self) is dealt with in much more detail than is the second one (ideas re
desired partner are limited to one sentence).
A lot of relevant personal info is conveyed.
Wide range of opinions clearly expressed – 1 re own personality expressed and explained;
another ‘gern’ re cycling; another re ‘Lieblingsfilm’; another re football stated and then
developed; last about the kind of person he likes.
This can be viewed as compensating rather for the limited response to the second strand of
the question (as opinions are a key feature and form part of the assessment of content in
this examination). Hence the upper mark band (10-12) is appropriate, with 10 marks
awarded due to awareness of limitations mentioned.
Range and Accuracy of Language 7/8
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The piece is generally accurate – there are frequent attempts to produce longer sentences,
using ‘und’ (2), ‘weil’ (2), some examples of inversion, and the start – though regrettably not
the end – of a relative clause.
There is not much variety of vocabulary – but the student manages to avoid repeating the
same ideas.
The piece seems to fit the descriptors for the 7-8 band – particularly the lower of these two
scores.
Also – as a double check – the piece seems to be demonstrably better deserving than the 5-6
band – which would be characterised by simple linking words/simple structures.
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Student 5 Foundation Tier Question 2a/ Higher Tier Question 1a
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Student 5 Foundation Tier Question 2a/ Higher Tier Question 1a
Commentary on Student’s Script
Content 6/12
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46 words long – so limited in length and scope – and this must be reflected in the marking.
Includes little ‘information about yourself’ and deals rather exclusively with the other strand
of the rubric. Because of this, and because of the brevity of the response, the top two mark
bands (‘quite a lot’ and ‘a reasonable amount of information’) are not appropriate and the
descriptor ‘some relevant info conveyed’ is more appropriate for this piece of work. The
work fits category for ‘Limited’ because of lack of information re self – we know only that he
is not good at German and wants to learn.
Opinions – the whole piece is really an extended opinion/justification – but also, more
specifically – ‘ein guter Partner für mich würde’…. and …’weil ich nicht gut auf deutsch bin’
are renderings of opinions/ideas in themselves, so he ‘can give at least one opinion’.
The clarity with which what is expressed is handled, means the top mark in this category is
awarded.
Range and Accuracy of Language 6/8
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If 6 is the mark given for Content (for reasons stated), the maximum score for Range and
Accuracy of Language is also 6.
It does seem to be ‘more accurate then inaccurate’. The first half is better than second in
terms of accuracy, and there are some good examples of more complex verb forms
(conditional and imperfect subjunctive.).
Longer sentences are formed with ‘weil’ and one with ‘damit’, one is formed using simple
‘und’ to link ideas.
There are a few conspicuous errors ‘so ich kann lernen’ and ‘er sollte …sind’, ‘er müsste
…habe, wir…kann’.
The language structures we see are better than simple – but there is not enough evidence
of range of vocabulary due to overall brevity.
A mark of 5 or a 6 could be given, but the quality in some parts of the response merits the
upper mark being awarded.
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Student 6 Foundation Tier Question 2a/ Higher Tier Question 1a
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Student 6 Foundation Tier Question 2a/ Higher Tier Question 1a
Commentary on Student’s Script
Content 11/12
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The student writes just over 100 words and this allows him to deal in a rather more
balanced way with the two strands of the task.
There is a good deal of information about himself (including a lot of physical description and
mention of personality – though he crosses one comment out…) but he also manages a
decent response about the desired partner – which is developed a little using modal verbs.
All the work is expressed sufficiently well for comprehension – there is nothing we cannot
grasp in terms of his intended meanings.
4 opinions are expressed – though not always well-expressed - ‘draussen’ for ‘aus’ is a
little messy (dictionary misuse?) / ‘ich triebe gern Sport’ is repeated / comment re
‘Lieblingsport’ is also not wholly accurate, where ‘am’ is used to replace the article and ‘Ich
mag haben gern zu Spaß’ may be comprehensible, but is convoluted).
It is right to consider the top mark band for Content, as a lot is conveyed clearly, including
some opinions, but the mid mark rather than the top one is considered the most
appropriate.
Range and Accuracy of Language 7/8
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‘Und’/’aber’/’oder’ are used as link words and there is good use of modals to form a couple
of longer sentences.
It partly fits 7-8 marks criteria and partly 5-6 marks criteria – so because of the
preponderance of longer sentences attempted (through link words and choice of slightly
more varied structures), the lower end of the top band is most appropriate, but a mark of 7
or 6 would be acceptable here.
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Student 7 Foundation Tier Question 2b/ Higher Tier Question 1b
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Student 7 Foundation Tier Question 2b/ Higher Tier Question 1b
Commentary on Student’s Script
Content 12/12
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At a little over 100 words, this piece is about the right length for an overlap question.
The response contains a lot of clearly expressed information and is a largely accurate piece
of writing about a past trip.
While the student does not make the expression of likes/dislikes his prime focus, he does
still convey a range of positive and negative opinions within the narrative. (‘Die Reise war
schnell aber ziemlich langweilig’ ‘…es war fantastisch und sehr billig’ / ‘es war lecker..’),
and this makes his response relevant in terms of the task set.
It is a very sound piece of writing and scores full marks for Content.
Range and Accuracy of Language 8/8
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The response is actually rather better than ‘generally accurate’. There are few conspicuous
errors and few major ones, and certainly none which compromise immediate
comprehension.
There are a few longer sentences formed with ‘aber’/ ‘und’/ modals (‘Es sind viele
Geschäfte und ich habe die Pullover gekauft.’/ ‘Wir sind um elf Uhr dreißig abgefahren und
und um Viertel vor zwei angekommen.’)
Complexity and variety is also in part achieved through the largely sustained use of past
tenses (some perfect tenses with ‘sein’ and some separable verbs conjugated correctly).
Though use of other tenses is not a requirement on this question, students who manage
different time frames accurately and use them appropriately will have this acknowledged in
the usual way under the ‘Range of Language/Accuracy’ section of the mark scheme.
The student’s use of time expressions and occasional other adverbs add to the variety,
though he does not always remember to invert.
Overall a top mark is considered appropriate.
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Student 8 Foundation Tier Question 2b/ Higher Tier Question 1b
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Student 8 Foundation Tier Question 2b/ Higher Tier Question 1b
Commentary on Student’s Script
Content 9/12
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At around 90 words, the piece respects the guidance re word count.
The task is essentially about expressing likes/dislikes, and the student succeeds in
conveying some opinions with total clarity (‘Die Reise war schnell und entspannt’/ ‘Die Stadt
war langweilig und sehr kalt’. ‘Ich mag die Architektur...’), and others with less accuracy (Ich
finde interessant Deuschland.’ / ‘…. es ist anders sein als England), though still well
enough for immediate comprehension.
A good deal of relevant information is conveyed clearly, but there are some weaknesses in
expression in parts of the response.
Because the student responds largely in the past tense, the sudden switch to a present
tense comment is ambiguous and it is unclear whether this comment refers to the German
trip or to other holidays. (‘Ich den Ferien wohne ich in einem Jugendherberge….’).
Inaccuracy also renders some of his comments about shopping less than clear.
For these reasons, the response seems a good fit for the 7-9 marks category, and 9/12 is
awarded.
Range and Accuracy of Language 6/8
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A few longer sentences are formed (using ‘und’ and ‘aber’). Though the student’s only
sporadic use of punctuation may mislead, most of what he says is expressed in short
bursts.
There is some variety of structure. The use of the past tense, not a requirement for this
question, but an obvious temptation given the nature of the task, is on occasion managed
quite well (‘Ich bin ….abgefahren.’ and a few examples of ‘war’ used appropriately), and the
student makes good use of the modal structure provided in support (‘Man kann zu
Volksfesten gehen…’)
The piece cannot however be considered ‘generally accurate’. There is a significant
incidence of quite major errors with verbs (‘Ich bin gekauft gehe.’ / ‘Ich bin gekauf ein TShirt.’/ ‘Auch bin du Sehenswurdigkeiten.’)
Because it is ‘more accurate than inaccurate’, the response fits the 5-6 band, and for the
reasons outlined above concerning attempts at variety, a mark of 6/8 is awarded.
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Student 9 Foundation Tier Question 2b/ Higher Tier Question 1b
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Student 9 Foundation Tier Question 2b/ Higher Tier Question 1b
Commentary on Student’s Script
Content 6/12
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At just a few words over the 80 word minimum recommended, the response is an example
of the work of quite a less able student, but one who has nevertheless had a go at
producing an appropriate response to the task.
The student appears to have run out of time, as the last sentence is unfinished. The student
possibly used considerable time looking up words in the dictionary – which perhaps
explains the rather incongruous use of such lexical items as ‘hiesig’ and ‘die Einheimischen’
(appropriately used), ‘ungefähr’ (inappropriately used to mean ‘about/concerning’), and also
high incidence of verbs which are used in the infinitive without any attempt at conjugation.
The limitations in expression are clear from the start (‘Ich bin antworten ungefähr die deutch
Riese.’).
However, some relevant details are successfully conveyed in a simple way – and basic
positive opinions are expressed about travel, the town, the locals and some food items.
There is no negative comment in response to the ‘dislike’ aspect of the rubric, and the use
of the English word ‘food’ negates the comment where it appears.
This piece fits the descriptors for a limited response (4-6). Though a mark of 5 was
considered, largely because of the simplicity of expression, a 6 is finally awarded because
of the number of relevant opinions included.
Range and Accuracy of Language 3/8
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Only a few of the verbs used are accurate (about a quarter of them) and this impacts
significantly on the overall quality of the response. As mentioned above, many verbs are
unconjugated and simply used in the infinitive form (exceptions are ‘ist’ and ‘war’, and the
incomplete statement started with ‘Ich finde…’ at the end of the response.)
There are a couple of attempts at longer sentences – one with ‘als’ which is not well
managed because of other errors (verb spelling /tense and word order), and one where
‘und’ is used to link two comments about desserts – but otherwise the sentences are short
and simple, usually conveying one idea.
It cannot be considered as ‘more accurate then inaccurate’ (5-6) so the mark range of 3-4 is
deemed appropriate. A score of 3 reflects the simple language which prevails.
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Student 10 Higher Tier Question 2a
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Student 10 Higher Tier Question 2a
Commentary on Student’s Script
Content 4/15
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The student produces fewer than 50 words on shopping habits (the guidance advises
students to aim for between 150 and 200).
Consequently very little of note is conveyed – there are about 5 random pieces of
information and few are well expressed.
There are some basic opinions (Ich liebe das Sägemehl kaufen) and a not very well-written
comment on online shopping.
There is no real attempt to respond appropriately and to develop ideas in any meaningful
way – with the possible exception of paragraph 2, but the ‘weil’ clause does not convey the
intended meaning with immediate clarity.
Its brevity and clear limitations would justly place this response at the lower end of the
Limited mark band.
4/15 is scored. (‘some relevant information conveyed’/ ‘some opinions are expressed’)
Range of Language 3/10
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The piece demonstrates only a very limited language range – and the repetition of a word
presumably found in the dictionary does little to support the student’s performance.
There were some doubts as to whether there was really enough here to warrant a 3 though
some vocabulary is certainly appropriate – but the evidence is very limited due to lack of
content produced.
There are a few variable attempts at longer sentences – one linked with ‘und’ and two with
‘weil’, (both of which are marred by errors).
A mark of 3 can just be awarded, as the successful structures are ‘mostly simple’ and the
vocabulary utilised manages to convey some basic notions relating to the topic.
Accuracy 3/5
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Verbs are not well chosen – and the nature of some of the errors would be likely to puzzle a
reader and delay comprehension – eg ‘wir wären’ and ‘dass all ich brauchen ist’.
However, there are some correct simple verbs and thus some information is conveyed
sufficiently well for it to be understood.
A mark of 3 is awarded despite reservations about the lack of sufficient evidence.
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Student 11 Higher Tier Question 2a
Commentary on Student’s Script
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Student 11 Higher Tier Question 2a
Commentary on Student’s Script
Content 11/15
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This is quite a lengthy response of around 188 words, and allows the student to attempt to
respond to all aspects of the question.
Recent spending is tackled in some degree of detail, though not always accurately (due
largely to issues with verbs and word order).
In the extended response about online shopping, the intended meanings are not always
clearly conveyed (again because of limitations in the control of grammar).
The student deals best with the strand about fashion, where her feelings are clearly
transmitted and explained, despite a number of persistent errors.
A number of opinions are fairly successfully expressed and developed.
Because of the uncertain communication in parts of the response, it is considered that the
piece cannot achieve a top mark, as some information is potentially lost to the reader.
However it does manage to convey a good deal of information despite its shortcomings.
A mark of 11 is awarded.
Range of Language 6/10
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The language here is often not of high quality, but it is ambitious and does have some good
features.
There are examples of correct present, imperfect, perfect and future tenses, together with a
conditional. Modal verbs are used, though with variable success.
There are examples of inversion and some simple linking of ideas using ‘aber’, and one
example of successful use of both ‘dass’ and ‘weil’.
On the other hand, many attempts at complexity (with ‘wenn’, ‘dass’, ‘obwohl’, ‘was’) are
unsuccessful and errors with verb forms (‘…dass ich es kaufen habe gehabt.’ / ‘..sie hatten
so viel Geld, dass sie nicht meinst wenn der Kleidungen siehen verschieden…’ / ‘..warum
musst Mode sagt was ist am allerbesten.’) and with word order may on occasion delay
immediate comprehension of intended meanings.
Ambition seems here to exceed skill. The 5-6 category is considered appropriate, where
‘attempts at longer sentences… are sometimes successful’.
Accuracy 3/5
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There are a number of very conspicuous errors with verbs (see some examples above), but
many more are correct than are incorrect.
On this basis, a mark of 3 is awarded.
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Student 12 Higher Tier Question 2a
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Student 12 Higher Tier Question 2a
Commentary on Student’s Script
Content 12/15
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The student writes a little over 180 words, and includes quite a well-developed response
relating to online shopping and a sound, if a little short, paragraph on fashion.
In these areas of the response, though particularly in the former, the student successfully
conveys information, views and explanations, though the clarity is sometimes compromised
by errors.
The first strand of the question (about recent shopping) is not addressed, and despite some
comments about general shopping habits, this means that the student misses the
opportunity provided to use past tense verb forms.
I would say that the response is generally a ‘good’ one, as it provides ‘mostly relevant’
detail, conveys ‘a lot of information clearly’ and includes ideas and opinions which are often
explained.
In view of the observations, a mark of 12 is awarded, though 11 was also considered.
Range of Language 8/10
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With a score for Content of 10-12, the student can access the full span of marks for Range
of Language.
This student, however, fails to demonstrate the use of another tense beyond the present,
and the top band in Range of Language cannot be considered.
The 7-8 mark band is considered first. There is indeed a range of appropriate vocabulary.
Around a dozen more complex sentence are attempted (with ‘um…zu’/ , ‘weil’/ ‘dass’/
‘denn’), almost all of which are correctly structured.
Some poor verb forms do however detract from the fluency which these longer sentences
might otherwise achieve, but a mark of 8 can be awarded, as there are a number of
examples of correct usage.
Accuracy 3/5
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The piece suffers somewhat from the student’s often shaky control of verbs (‘…mag ich
ausgegeben mein Geld…’/ ‘…mache ich ausgegeben mein Geld…’ / ‘…dass Sie die
Sicherheit erhören.’/ ‘…mehr Manschen gibt einkaufen werde.’).
Around these, there are examples of correct verb forms, producing a very mixed effect
overall, but it would not be true to say, as is required for a score of 4, that ‘verbs and tense
formations are usually correct’.
A mark of 3 seems the best fit here.
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Student 13 Higher Tier Question 2b
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Student 13 Higher Tier Question 2b
Commentary on Student’s Script
Content 8/15
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118 words (a little over half the maximum in terms of the guidance) is too short for a good
response to this question, where not only relevance, but also detail and development are
sought. Brevity limits access to marks in the top band – as students are unlikely to be able
to produce in many fewer words an answer which will satisfy the criteria in terms of detail.
The first strand is dealt with in some detail (likes/dislikes re school), the second (studentteacher relationships) is touched on but lacks development, the third one (ambitions) shows
a little development but this is limited in scope and there is also some faulty language,
which begins to get in the way of clarity.
More than half the response is taken up with comments about school - the rest lacks
adequate depth and detail.
The piece sits around ‘Sufficient’ in the assessment criteria – the content is relevant and
manages to communicate quite a lot of information clearly, but without the degree of
explanation of ideas and opinions one would see in a more assured response.
Some ideas are developed – so a mark of 8/15 is awarded.
Range of Language 5/10
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‘Some variety of vocabulary and structure’ seems a good description of this response–
there are some longer and more complex sentences (with ‘und’ / ‘aber’/ ‘weil’/ ‘zu’ +
infinitive) – but some attempts are not successful – modals/one ‘um…zu’ – has no ‘ zu’, the
other is missing ‘um’ from the beginning).
The vocabulary is fairly ordinary – and more interesting word choices like ‘Fachwahl’ do not
occur frequently.
It thus fits the 5-6 band, and scores a mark of 5/10.
Accuracy 3/5
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There are quite frequent errors with verbs (‘sie haben mich geinspiert’/ ‘man mussen
nett…sein’ / ‘dann kann ich eine Leherin bin’/ ‘…werde ich zu Abitur gehe.’/ ‘Ich muss gehe
jetzt.’) and other aspects of language (sie sind spaß) – but a good many verb forms are
also correct (‘ich bin ziemlich glücklich’/ ‘die Stunden sind ein bisschen lang’).
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There are correct examples of a Perfect (‘…habe ich meine Fach Wahl gemacht’) and a
Future Tense (‘…werde ich wieder meine Wahl machen.’). The piece overall is more
accurate than inaccurate and scores a mark of 3/5.
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Student 14 Higher Tier Question 2b
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Student 14 Higher Tier Question 2b
Commentary on Student’s Script
Content 12/15
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At 155 words, this response only just satisfies the guidelines (150-200) for Higher Question
2. It’s unfortunate that the student did not manage to write more, as much of what is here is
good, but the response is unbalanced and lacks detail and development in some areas.
She conveys some clear opinions about being happy at school and supports these opinions
with a little development and explanation, which she uses at the same time to comment on
student-teacher relationships. This dual use of information, while it does form part of a
relevant response, does at the same time rather prevent the student exploring either strand
in the detail and depth which might have allowed her to access higher marks.
The comment about cinema – perhaps because of the error with the verb form – appears
irrelevant.
The student deals much better with her ambitions for the future, giving a good deal of
varied information about both professional and personal aspirations, writing at more length
to expand and explain her plans and dealing largely effectively with the grammatical
structures needed to manage this.
Had the other areas been handled in equal depth, this could have been a high mark, but as
it is, it falls into the ‘Good’, rather than the ‘Very Good’ band of the assessment criteria and
scores a mark of 12/15.
Range of Language 6/10
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The range of language is sound though not striking, and the vocabulary remains for the
most part fairly pedestrian, with one or two good exceptions (eine Lehre/ unterrichten/
unterstützen/ beibringen).
There are, however, frequent examples of longer sentences (most linked using ‘und’ and
‘aber’) and a number of appropriate inversions. Attempts at more complex sentences using
subordinating conjunctions (‘weil’/ ‘obwohl’ / ‘wenn’) are not always successful.
The verbs appear in the Present/Perfect/Future/Conditional.
There are instances of clauses with ‘zu’ and the infinitive, personal pronouns, modals (‘Ich
kann’s kaum erwarten’) and an example of a separable verb – all used appropriately.
The response hovers between 6/10 and 7/10, and more evidence of complex sentences
used accurately would have helped to secure the higher of these two marks. A mark of 6 is
awarded.
Accuracy 4/5
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The response is a good fit for the 4/5 descriptor – and is undoubtedly better than the
descriptor for 3 (where one would see more frequent errors with verbs and tense
formations).
It is ‘generally accurate’, with only occasional conspicuous errors with verbs (‘wir geht’, for
example), and tense formations are ‘usually correct’.
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Student 15 Higher Tier Question 2b
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Student 15 Higher Tier Question 2b
Commentary on Student’s Script
Content 12/15
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At 134 words, the response is a little short for a fully developed Higher Question 2 –
students need to be trained to respond in detail and with development of their ideas to
access the highest marks.
This is a good example of what could have been a high scoring answer, had all the points
been addressed. The student gives plenty of information about good and bad points about
his school, and includes developed and explained opinions. The coverage of staff-student
relationships is rather thin, but he completely omits to mention anything about future plans.
Thus what he writes is all relevant, but it’s not complete as an answer to the question set.
Therefore the ‘Good’ mark band, rather than the ‘Very Good’ band is deemed appropriate,
and the response scores a mark of 12/15 – as it conveys ‘a lot of information’ but falls short
of producing an answer which satisfies the full rubric.
Range of Language 10/10
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The piece is a pleasure to read, fluent, natural and connected and with very few, if indeed
any, errors.
While he fails to focus on the main opportunity for future tense use (‘your ambitions for the
future’), he incidentally includes a future tense in his comments about school uniform, and
another in his reflection at the end of the piece. He also demonstrates fluent use of past
tenses in his narration of a bullying incident at school, and so satisfies the requirement to
show successful use of verb tenses.
The vocabulary range is extended and interesting
(Nachteile/Vorteile/lächerlich/Mitschülerin/lösen/veröffentlichen/zusammenschlagen/die
Tat).
There are some pleasing lexical touches, which add to the fluency and natural flow of the
German (mehr Nachteile als Vorteile/beim Uniformtragen/dabei).
Sentence patterns are varied and sentences well constructed – we see examples of
inversion/future tense/past tense/sep verbs/wenn/zu + infinitive.
These elements combine to produce a confident piece of German which deserves full credit
so a mark of10/10 is awarded.
Accuracy 5/5
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Despite one word which is difficult to decipher on line 4, the response is actually otherwise
fully accurate so full marks are achieved in this category.
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