GCSE ENGLISH LITERATURE
(STRENGTHENED
SPECIFICATION)
UNIT 3
CONTROLLED ASSESSMENT
SAMPLES WITH COMMENTARY
Please note that for the purposes of clarity and ease of reading, the essays have had
most of the technical errors corrected since SSPS does not play a part in the
assessment criteria.
As noted in the general report, available on the WJEC website, when centres made
separate assessments for each of the three Assessment Objectives, the marks tended
to be more accurate. Holistic assessments were frequently very inaccurate, the main
problem being that the AO3 aspect was overvalued.
Sample 1: The theme of love in ‘Hamlet’ and various poems.
Love is a vital component of literature and is a recurring theme in numerous novels, plays
and poems. The nature of the love itself and the way in which it is presented varies greatly from the harmonious to the tumultuous - resulting in a wide range of intriguing literary
relationships.
Despite ‘Hamlet’ being a tragedy, meaning love is not a major theme, Shakespeare presents
a complex relationship between Hamlet and Ophelia, which leans more towards the
tumultuous. Some interpret the relationship as one of unfulfilled opportunities because of
external circumstances and third-party interference. Others - myself included - interpret it as
that of superficial admiration and a limited, naive understanding of love rather than the tragic
affair some make it out to be. However one interprets it, there is no doubt that Shakespeare
presents and develops a complex relationship using a variety of thematic, linguistic and
contextual devices.
One way in which Shakespeare presents the relationship between Hamlet and Ophelia from
different views is through speech of other characters. For example, before we even witness
an interaction between Hamlet and Ophelia, the audience already has preconceived ideas
about the relationship from the respective speech of Laertes and Polonius at different parts
of Act 1 Scene 3. The scene presents negative opinions of the relationship as both Laertes
and Polonius warn Ophelia about Hamlet. Laertes tells his sister to ‘be wary’ of Hamlet and
to ‘hold [his affection as] a fashion’. The word ‘fashion’ implies that his favour will fade and
die like a ‘violet in the youth of primy nature’ with ‘the perfume and suppliance of a minute,
no more’. From the start of the play we trust Laertes, although this changes later on, as he
seems like an obedient son and caring brother. Because of this, the audience trusts what he
says about the relationship and Shakespeare uses this to present the rocky foundations of
the relationship, which prepares us for the events later in the play.
Laertes also introduces the idea that Hamlet’s fickleness could be a result of his position as
a prince because ‘his will is not his own’ as he is ‘subject to his birth’. The concept of a
Christian prince was popular at the time so this idea would have been significant to the
original audience and the idea would have affected how the audience perceived the
relationship. The conversation prepares the viewers for the later events and slightly
foreshadows the plot after the Ghost’s appearance in Act 1 Scene 5.
Polonius holds a much more cynical view about the sincerity of Hamlet’s affections but his
speech has the same intent: to warn Ophelia off Hamlet. Polonius likens Hamlet’s pursuit of
Ophelia to that of a hunter with ‘springes to catch woodcocks’, presenting a dark but
generally accurate take on the extent of Hamlet’s ‘love’. It is obvious that Polonius does not
believe Hamlet’s ‘tenders’ to be true and demands that Ophelia ‘not believe his vows’. All of
this reinforces the ideas presented in Ophelia’s interaction with Laertes. The word ‘fashion’ is
also repeated to support the notion that Hamlet’s affection will change and Polonius
dismissively says ‘fashion you may call it’. The scene presents an interesting power dynamic
between Polonius and Ophelia that later affects her relationship with Hamlet and this is
shown through Polonius’ authoritative tone and his demands. Ophelia is also much less
astute than she was when joking with her brother, which supports the idea that she plays the
obedient daughter.
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This scene is also the first time we the audience see Ophelia’s reaction to the accusations
against Hamlet. It is obvious that prior to the events of the play Hamlet ‘importunes [Ophelia]
with love in honourable fashion’ while making ‘many tenders of his affections’ known,
something which he does not do in the course of the play Consequently we can assume that
Ophelia believes his love to be true. However, since the first reference to their relationship is
negative, Shakespeare presents it in a way that makes the audience and possibly Ophelia,
question the sincerity of his affection. All of these examples show Shakespeare using other
characters to present the relationship.
Power and control are sources of disagreement and discontent in all communities and
Shakespeare’s 16th Century Denmark is no exception. Based on the societal construct of
the time, Ophelia is a relatively passive character- something which is often wrongly
identified as weak- in her relationships which is especially evident in her relationships with
Hamlet and Polonius. Both feel entitled to her loyalty and obedience - most likely because
they are men - and this dynamic greatly affects the Hamlet/Ophelia relationship.
The power in equality can be seen from the respective number of lines between the
characters. In all the interactions throughout the play the speech is male - dominated. In
addition, it is obvious that Ophelia feels a great sense of duty to her relationships, with her
family responsibilities proving strongest. She goes to Polonius ‘in obedience’ and ‘denied
[Hamlet] access’ to herself upon her father’s earlier wishes. Polonius assumes because he
is her father that Ophelia will obey with him and he abuses his patriarchal power by forcing
her to spy on Hamlet. He ‘looses his daughter’, using a word which one normally associates
with animals perhaps indicating how he sees his daughter simply as a mechanism for
entrapping Hamlet, as Hamlet ‘walks four hours together ... in the lobby’. To a certain extent
Ophelia is oppressed by Polonius’ manipulation, which creates a situation where she is
struck between loyalties and ‘betrayal’. This is, unfortunately, reflective of the time. Maledominance both affects and is evident in Hamlet and Ophelia’s relationship.
Hamlet manipulates Ophelia in a similar way to Polonius through his sexist and elitist
assumptions thinking he has control of the relationship and that Ophelia owes him
something. Not only does Hamlet have predetermined power in the relationship because of
his gender but also because of his royal position. Hamlet uses his assumed control over
Ophelia when testing her in Act 3 Scene 1. He is angered by Ophelia’s lie that Polonius is ‘at
home’ and this is further evidence of his feelings of entitlement. The fact that he reacts in
such a brash, angry way - ‘I’ll give thee this plague for thy dowry’ - not only shows that
Hamlet has little understanding or appreciation of Ophelia’s duty to her father in accordance
to societal norms but also shows that he feels as though Ophelia owes it to him to choose
him over her father, and thus supports the notion that Shakespeare presents the relationship
through power dynamics.
‘Words, words, words’ is another way that Shakespeare presents the relationship and this is
primarily done through Hamlet’s language. A key part of Hamlet seeming, mad was ‘how
pregnant sometimes his replies are’, relating to the double entendres that frequent Hamlet’s
speech. An example of this is Hamlet calling Polonius a ‘fishmonger’, which could imply that
he is a prostitute’s pimp in reference to the way he manipulates his daughter, as well as
appearing as babblingly mad. Many of Hamlet’s assessments are shrewd and serve some
higher purpose and this can be related to the words in the letter that Hamlet sends to
Ophelia, which provide further insight into the nature of their relationship. The love letter in
Act 2 Scene 2 is used to set up Hamlet’s bout of lovesickness and his choice of language is
key. When reading the letter, the King, Queen and Polonius examine the language to
determine that he is still ‘harping on’ [Ophelia], setting up the front. ‘Beautified Ophelia’ is a
‘vile phrase’ as Polonius comments but the strategic exaggeration supports Hamlet’s facade
and shows another way that Hamlet manipulates their relationship to his advantage.
However, as there is an element of truth in his words, Hamlet’s declaration ‘doubt thou the
stars are fire, doubt the sun doth move, doubt truth be a liar but never doubt I love’ could be
sincere. Hamlet does supposedly love Ophelia throughout the play so these words could
reflect his true feelings but it is important to note that the only time he is actually pleasant to
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Ophelia is in this letter, which he is using for personal gain. This presents a suspect
relationship and raises many questions about the truth in his declarations of affection.
Another way in which Shakespeare presents the relationship using words is through
Hamlet’s rudeness towards Ophelia - specifically in Act 3 Scene 2. Some say that Hamlet
acts out to perpetuate and reinforce his appearance as mad but, as far as we know, he was
not actually mad so he made the deliberate choice to say the potentially hurtful things to
Ophelia. The scene reveals Hamlet’s malicious side as he verbally assaults Ophelia with
sexual innuendos that clearly make her uncomfortable and this presents a different
unhealthy aspect of the relationship. Throughout the scene Hamlet is, simply put,
obnoxious. He mocks Polonius by stating it was a ‘brute part of him to kill such capital a
calf’; he dampens the mood by mentioning ‘my father died within’s two hours’, and he
publicly humiliates his mother by referencing her short-lived feelings for his father after his
death. He is the most unnecessarily vicious towards Ophelia as he seems to deliberately
make her uncomfortable as a sort of punishment for the events of the previous scene, which
is not the act of someone who truly loves a woman. He makes some very explicit comments
about ‘country matters’ despite Ophelia’s obvious discomfort, which interestingly shows that
she understands the bawdy reference. Her replies are simple and non-committal almost as if
she knows the game he is playing but is too embarrassed in the company of the court to
admit it. ‘Ay my lord’ and ‘ I think nothing, my lord’ invite Hamlet’s wit. It is ironic that Hamlet
jokes sexually at Ophelia after telling her to ‘get to a nunnery’ a crude reference that perhaps
she does not pick up on. Shakespeare presents a cruel side to the relationship through the
sexual jesting and this adds another negative dynamic to the already unhealthy liaison.
‘Ophelia has the potential to be a tragic heroine but instead crumbles into insanity, becoming
merely tragic’ is one interpretation of Ophelia’s disintegration into madness, which is another
aspect that Shakespeare uses to present Hamlet and Ophelia’s relationship. In a similar
way to Hamlet’s choice of words in his feigned madness, Ophelia’s words - specifically
songs - shown in her breakdown, provide an insight into the relationship. Ophelia’s
madness is genuine and in stark contrast to Hamlet’s, with little ‘method in’t’ and a
distracted, submissive nature - reflective of her character - as opposed to Hamlet’s
deliberate double entendres and combative nature. The snatches of songs have common
themes of sexuality, lost love, unrequited affection and deceiving partners, which reflect the
likely causes of her breakdown. While it is important to note that the songs used were in
existence before the play, it is the way in which Shakespeare uses them that makes them
significant. It is obvious that Ophelia was deeply affected by her father being ‘dead and
gone’ but, as most of her songs are about romantic betrayal, it is likely that she has more
distraught about Hamlet and his role in Polonius’ death. Because of her mental state,
Ophelia has much more freedom of speech, which allows Shakespeare to add another
dimension to the Hamlet/Ophelia relationship: the possibility of a sexual relationship.
Through her songs, Ophelia implies that Hamlet might have ‘tumbled’ her and ‘promised
[her] to wed’, which shows Shakespeare using Ophelia’s madness to present the possibility
of a sexual relationship.
Throughout the play, Shakespeare presents Hamlet and Ophelia’s relationship using the
speech of others, power politics and familial loyalties, a strategic choice of words, and
madness and manipulation. All of these combined portray the toxic relationship, which
seems doomed from the start. As the victim of the relationship, suffering from misogynistic
bullying and sexual intimidation, Ophelia was stuck in a life of passivity. If she did indeed
take her own life as some assume, then that could have been her ultimate act of defiance
and strength, representing her finally taking control of her life to end the unhealthy
relationship and the inevitable lifetime of unhappiness once and for all. This is a tragically
dysfunctional relationship.
Unlike drama, poetry does not always present relationships using different and varied
characters, but rather relies on language, tone and poetic devices. ‘To His Coy Mistress’ by
Andrew Marvell portrays the theme of love in very different times. However, the nature of
the relationships and the way in which they are presented are similar.
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‘To His Coy Mistress’ presents the rather crude argument of a 17th century gentleman trying
to convince his mistress to stop holding back her assumed feelings for him and to sleep with
him. The majority of the poem aims to persuade the mistress but it also presents some
interesting themes that affect the relationship. From the start of the poem, Marvell presents
an unconventional sharing view on love. The entire first stanza mocks the traditional ‘ideal
love’, which is commonly romanticised in literature. Exaggeration is used to mock and
undermine the ideal held by many about the idyllic nature of love and this shown through
references to ‘rubies’ found’ by ‘the Indian Ganges side’. While he ‘by the Tide of Humber
would complain’ she would be off into the exotic (and erotic) world of the sacred river
Ganges collecting the love-related ruby. This world of make believe could be reflective of the
poet’s own views. The fact that this relationship is impossible is presented through the use
of the subjunctive and the word ‘had’. ‘Had’ implies that although ‘an hundred years’ to
‘praise thine eyes’ and ‘thirty thousand to the rest’ would be wonderful, it is impossible
because they don’t have ‘world enough, and time’. The dry closing statement of the first
stanza ‘you deserve this state...love at lower rate’ is a further example of hyperbole
undermining traditional love affairs as it is obvious that this is not what the poet believes. On
the whole, Marvell uses exaggeration to present the ideas shown as ridiculous in an attempt
to convince the mistress to listen to his more realistic views expressed in the second stanza.
While the poem presents an interesting relationship, it is difficult to identify it as being based
on love. There are few references to the speaker’s love for the mistress with almost all
indications relating to his ‘vegetable love’. The frank discussion of sex suggests that the
main theme of the poem is lust rather than love. One way in which this is presented is
through the use of euphemisms throughout the poem. When not explicitly talking about sex,
sexual allusions are used, which adds to the relationship’s flirtations, lustful nature. His
‘vegetable love’ and ‘lust’, her ‘quaint honour’, the ‘worms’ and the final ‘tear our pleasure
with rough strife Thorough the iron gates of life’ are all insinuations based on sexual desire
and Marvell uses them to present the theme as lust, making it a mainly sexual relationship,
as well as using it to encourage the mistress to give in to his demands. Besides this the
poem is structured in the form of a logical argument the reasoning inevitably leading to the
outrageous conclusion ‘Now let us sport us while we may…’ Marvell’s witty and scurrilous
poem makes a mockery of romantic love although it uses the conventions of this genre.
In comparison to Hamlet and Ophelia’s relationship, Marvell in ‘To His Coy Mistress’ seems
much more clear cut despite the one-sided and controversial nature of the content.
Shakespeare presents the theme of love between Hamlet and Ophelia as weak though
complex at best while Marvell concentrates on the primal nature of the couple’s physical
relationship. The speaker in ‘To His Coy Mistress’ has no qualms with seeming crude and
used euphemisms in a playful way rather than a cruel way, unlike Hamlet’s malevolent
sexual jesting, which shows neither passion nor desire. Shakespeare’s ‘country matters’ and
Marvell’s ‘quaint honour’ refer to the same thing but it is the context and tone in which it is
used that shows the clear differences in the relationships. Similarly, when Marvell writes,
‘The grave’s a fine and private place, but none I think do there embrace’ the reminder to the
woman is down to earth and crudely honest. He does not mince words in telling the
‘mistress’ the possible consequences of her inaction. Hamlet, on the other hand, uses
euphemisms in a cruel way to make Ophelia uncomfortable, which shows the unhealthy
nature of their relationship, while the speaker in the poem uses them to aid in his
persuasion, demonstrating a much more natural relationship. This shows how the authors
use the same technique to present different aspects of relationships.
Passion is a factor of both love and lust but the use of passionate language in ‘To His Coy
Mistress’ reinforces the theme of lust. The final stanza has the most interesting language as
it focuses on the physical aspects of the possible relationship and it is clear that this what
Marvell is most interested in. This stanza truly reflects what the poem is about, which is the
urgency and desire of the speaker’s desire for his mistress and this presents the couple’s
relationship as short- lived and tumultuous. Some of the words are quite violent and
animalistic and can be seen when the speaker suggests that they should ‘at once our time
devour’ like ‘amorous birds of prey’. The animalistic theme is representative of the desire
and the fleetingness of their passion, suggesting that they ‘seize the day’. This concept
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defies Puritanism, which was a popular movement of the time that emphasised denying
personal pleasures was one way of worshipping God. The passion presents a very wild
relationship. The language used is very different to that of a poem about the purity and
sanctity of love, such as Sonnet 73 by Elizabeth Barrett Browning, which advises to love
‘freely’, ‘purely’ and with ‘childhood’s faith’. Hamlet and Ophelia’s relationship has no
language that supports a passionate or a pure love, which could be indicative of the lack of
uncomplicated affection between the couple. Overall, the language presents a distorted
passion between the couple and supports a zealous, probably unfulfilled, physical
relationship rather than an adoring emotional relationship.
Unlike Barrett Browning, who suggests one can ‘love ... better after death’, ‘To His Coy
Mistress’ presents the idea that morality and time are the enemy of lovers. This is starkly
different to the play where the enemy of the lovers is the corrupt and dishonest political world
that they inhabit. The poem uses references to the fleetingness of love due to time and
imagery relating to the ‘deserts of vast eternity’ to the nothingness in death. The idea of
limited time is very different from the common interpretations of true love, with many poets,
including Shakespeare in Sonnet 116, believing ‘love’s not time’s fool’ suggesting true love is
not affected by time. This presents the relationship in ‘To His Coy Mistress’ as
unconventional and possibly reinforces the theme of lust. The beginning of the final stanza
brings the reader’s attention to the temporary nature of youth as the speaker suggests the
couple’s ‘youthful hue’ will fade ‘like morning dew’, which highlights how easily youth and
love can disappear and aims to encourage the mistress into entering a sexual relationship.
Sadly in the play, the relationship between Hamlet and Ophelia never gets the chance to
‘fade’. The poisonous world they live in destroys any chance of its natural development.
There are also references in the poem to the morality of both the speaker and his mistress,
with constant imagery concerning death to reinforce it. Marvell presents the idea that after
death there would be no point to ‘coyness’ in regards to ‘that long preserved virginity’
because as love is only a temporary state rather than the eternal human condition many
romanticise it to be. The idea that love and everything will ‘turn to dust’ refers to the religious
concept of Christian burials and the use of a religious allusions is, ironically, used to
encourage the mistress to seize the day by giving in to the speaker. Marvell presents the
results of the mistress saying no as her imprisonment in a ‘marble vault’ where his ‘echoing
song’ will not reach her and, through the association of rejection, to imprisonment and death,
he presents acceptance as freedom and strength; both death and time are personified to
urge the mistress to ‘sport us while we may’ rather than ‘languish in his slow-chapt pow’r’,
where ‘his’ is death. All of these show that Marvell uses morality and time to show that
although death is inevitable, life should be made the most of ‘while the youthful hew sits on
thy skin’. Not only is this another persuasive technique but it also presents the relationship
as one that is utilising every moment of its brief time. In ‘Hamlet’ we see the outcome of not
seizing the day as suggested by Marvell when Hamlet in the graveyard cries out ‘I lov’d
Ophelia; forty thousand brothers could not…make up my sum’. By this time, of course, it is
too late. Time has taken the chance of happiness away.
One of the main links between the Hamlet/Ophelia relationship and the couple in ‘To His Coy
Mistress’ is the use of classical allusions and concepts, particularly momento mori and carpe
diem. However, the way they are used and what they reveal about the respective
relationships differ greatly. In ‘Hamlet’, momento mori is referenced through the idea that all
beauty inevitably fades so being ‘fair’ is more important and this is evident in Hamlet’s anger
at Ophelia lying to him. He claims ‘honesty should admit no discourse to...beauty’ and
constantly refers to how beauty never lasts. There are connections between death and the
loss of features when Hamlet questions where Yorick’s ‘Flashes of merriment’, ‘gibes’ and
‘songs’ are now that he is dead before concluding one can ‘paint an inch thick, to this favour
she must come’ reminding us of Hamlet’s cruel accusation to Ophelia ‘I’ve heard of your
paintings too well enough. God has given you one face and you make yourself another.’ It is
impossible, he claims, to avoid age and death. Indeed, much of the imagery throughout the
play is concerned with death, decay and the need to ‘put on a face’. In ‘To His Coy Mistress’,
on the other hand there are fewer references to the negative respects of vanity and more
references to how to make the best use of time before death. The speaker suggests that
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with ‘time’s winged chariot hurrying near’ ‘beauty shall no more found’ - a reference to the
transient nature of beauty - and resolves that the best use of time is to engaged in an explicit
relationship.
The main way ‘Hamlet’ and ‘To His Coy Mistress’ differ is in the implications of the ‘momento
mori’. While Hamlet uses the concept to highlight the importance of repentance and
‘fairness’, ‘To His Coy Mistress’ uses the same idea to urge the mistress to ‘tear...pleasures
with rough strife’, which presents the relationship as one that defies conventions to embrace
the importance of living through the more important classical allusion (to him) ‘carpe diem’.
The Hamlet/Ophelia relationship is much more modest as it believes the more superficial,
puritanical side of ‘memento mori carpe diem’ with Hamlet embracing the idea that all
beauty, and to a certain extent fun, is inconsequential once dead. This affects his
relationship as he advises Ophelia to repent her sins by ‘[getting] to a nunnery’ in a
misguided attempt to ‘save’ herself in the afterlife. Marvell on the other hand, presents the
concept in a much more progressive way through his belief that as there is no need for
repentance, which is most likely reflective of his own views. Marvell being a metaphysical
poet, explored the meaning of life through his poetry and this poem could present the
modern view that a life is for living rather than preparing for what could come after and this is
shown in the relationship in ‘To His Coy Mistress’. Therefore, while Shakespeare explores
the importance of modesty and ‘fairness’, Marvell uses the same concepts to present a
passionate love affair that accepts that ‘though we cannot make our sun stand still, yet we
will make him run’.
Power is a theme that is evident in both relationships. As mentioned previously, the power
imbalance in Hamlet and Ophelia’s relationship affected it greatly and most likely led to its
demise. In ‘To His Coy Mistress’, on the other hand, the relationship is significantly more
equal as the mistress has obvious power. The mistress apparently plays an inactive role in
the relationship and it seems she is manipulated but she has the power to say no and deny
Marvell his desire. She is not outright oppressed like Ophelia is. Also in the final stanza
Marvell refers to the couple in plural first person as ‘we’ and ‘us’, which implies a more ‘coequal love’ like Christina Walsh requested in her poem ‘A Woman to Her Lover’. However,
the very nature of their relationship shows the power is still held by the man as the speaker
just wants the mistress to ‘gratify [his] clamorous desires.’ Another poem, ‘They Did Not
Expect This’, although still set in a very misogynistic time, is very progressive and shows a
clear difference in power dynamics. There are very few references to gender roles and the
majority of the poem refers to them as ‘they’.
Overall, the texts present love and relationships in negative ways with a shared cynicism.
This is done through language, themes and structure to produce engaging, thought
provoking texts that question the very varied nature of love.
AO1 Band 5 (8-10)
Candidates:
make increasingly assured selection and incorporation of relevant detail;
are able to speculate/offer tentative judgements;
are able to evaluate characters/relationships and attitudes/motives;
at the highest level, consistently handle texts with confidence, have an overview and ability
to move from the specific to the general;
convey ideas persuasively and cogently with apt textual support.
AO2 Band 5 (8-10)
Candidates:
show appreciation of how writers use language to achieve specific effects;
make assured exploration and evaluation of the ways meaning, ideas and feeling are
conveyed through language, structure and form;
at the highest level, make assured analysis of stylistic features.
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AO3 Band 5 (16-20)
Candidates:
make a sustained discussion of links between texts, confidently evaluating subject, theme,
character and the impact of texts;
make apt selection of details for cross reference and confidently explore writers’ different
ways of expressing meaning and achieving effects;
at the highest level, make subtle points of connection and probe links confidently.
Commentary
AO1 Band 5 (8-10)
The texts, though limited in number, are certainly ‘handled with confidence’. Characters and
relationships are considered in depth, as are motivation and attitudes. Textual support is
abundant and the candidate has a clear and mature understanding of the language used by
the writers. The bulk of the work is concerned with the play and a single poem, though
others are mentioned. However, there is no shortage of material in these rich texts.
Mark 10
AO2 Band 5 (8-10)
There is good evidence throughout the essay of the candidate’s ability to ‘show appreciation
of how writers use language’. The candidate has a mature and scholarly approach to the
consideration of words, phrases and ideas and the analysis is assured.
Mark 10
AO3 Band 5 (16-20)
The major strength of the essay lies in the candidate’s ability to draw relationships between
the texts and this aspect is certainly ‘sustained’. The candidate can ‘confidently explore
writers’ different ways of expressing meaning’ and consistently backs points up with textual
detail and reference. The links are ‘probed’ with a confidence born of the complete grasp of
the texts. The ability to move around the texts freely and choose illustrative references with
certainty is excellent.
Mark 20
Total 40
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Sample 2: Love relationships and the position of women in ‘Romeo and Juliet’ and
selected poems.
In Shakespeare’s play ‘Romeo and Juliet’, Romeo and Juliet’s relationship throughout Act 2
Scene 2 develops rapidly because it contains characteristics associated with love such as
lust and the desire of privacy – both present in typical relationships of their era, the 16th
century. Controversial elements such as women’s superiority are supported by the
presentation of relationships in the poem ‘A Woman to her lover’ but such superiority is
denied to the persona in ‘Cousin Kate’, creating contrasts in the pieces of literature. These
links and contrasts will be considered in relation to the play ‘Romeo and Juliet’ and the
poems ‘A Married State’, ‘A Woman to her lover’, ‘Cousin Kate’ and ‘To his Coy Mistress’.
The relationship in ‘To his Coy Mistress’ is like Romeo and Juliet’s since it commences with
beauty prompting lust. Romeo says, looking at Juliet, ‘Oh speak again bright angel, for thou
art/As glorious to this night’. The words ‘bright angel’ emphasise how rare, astonishing and
almost magical Juliet’s beauty is to Romeo. Moreover, ‘bright’ implies that Juliet is already
the light of Romeo’s life that keeps him excitedly awake and living. Also, the use of religious
imagery indicates the serious passionate love Romeo has for Juliet as religion was taken
seriously in the 16th century when virtually everyone believed in God.
The love-stricken Romeo exaggerates Juliet’s beauty when he hails her ‘glorious’, a person
to obey, praise and admire. In this way he introduces the idea of woman’s superiority.
Marvell notes something similar when he flatters his ‘mistress’: ‘An hundred years should go
to praise Thine eyes…Two hundred to …each breast’. The persona in ‘To his Coy Mistress’
has such strong admiration of this woman’s beauty that he claims he would worship her for
an exaggerated ‘hundred years’ surrendering his lust for her until such time as she is ready
to submit to his desires – elevating her superiority. In addition, focusing on her ‘breast’
suggests that the only reason he is interested in a relationship with the woman is because of
her attractive appearance and sex. Therefore, he fantasizes about her losing her virginity to
him through the simile ‘like amorous birds of prey’, portraying the sexual experience as an
exciting way to satisfy your sexual desire though ‘prey’ suggests a sense of danger and
unease.
In Romeo and Juliet’s relationship, Juliet’s reciprocated love for Romeo escalates at a
dangerously rapid pace. This is evident when Juliet expresses her superiority by reciting his
name ‘Romeo, Romeo, wherefore…’ Even though Juliet has only met Romeo a few hours
earlier in Act 1, Juliet’s repetition of Romeo’s name emphasises that it took the short time of
a few hours for the thought of Romeo to make Juliet feel affectionate and lustful. However,
because of the notorious Montague and Capulet feud, Juliet Capulet questions her forbidden
love for Romeo Montague in a sorrowful tone of pity for herself as family feuds in the 16th
century were so devastatingly dangerous that people involved could end up being killed,
foreshadowing the end of the play.
In comparison to Juliet, Marvell in ‘To his Coy Mistress’’ is enthusiastic for a rushed
relationship as he considers the consequences of a slow, or no, relationship in his
contemplation of any failure to gain her. He says that his ‘lust’ will be turned into ‘ashes’. The
grey colour of ‘ashes’ symbolises burnt out and forgotten lust. Moreover, ‘ashes’ are dusty
and light, which accentuates the lack of certainty in the future, as the woman could die at
any time, especially in the society of unhygienic, 17th century England. Therefore, it is vital
that, as far as he is concerned, the woman loses ‘that long-preserved virginity’ as soon as
possible. However, the manipulative narrator exaggerates this metaphorically to frighten the
woman into rushing the relationship.
Manipulation in a relationship is stressed further by the aggressive tone of the ‘A Woman to
her Lover’s persona and Juliet. An example of this would be when Juliet uses a forceful tone
to once again establish women’s superiority by ordering Romeo to ‘Deny thy name’. She
also speaks a soliloquy of passionate love for Romeo and consequently confesses her love
for him, thus going against the stereotypical young woman in the 16th century twice, the
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stereotype being that 16th century girls should always be inferior to men and never confess
their love for a man, as it was highly inappropriate. As a result of breaking the stereotype
twice, Juliet risks her reputation but proves that she is not going to be content with being the
meek daughter of a rich man who can dispose of her in marriage where he likes. Capulet
tries to do exactly this later in the play.
Similar to Juliet, Walsh in ‘A Woman to her Lover’ uses an aggressive tone to present
relationships where women are dominant: ‘Go!...fool, I refuse you!’ Usually in the 18th
century, it was the role of men to make choices associated with relationships such as which
partner to have – as highlighted by the persona of ‘Cousin Kate’ where the lord ‘chose’ Kate
– but Walsh does not seem to care about breaking the rules by taking the dominant role as
the imperative verb ‘Go!’ suggests she is in control. As well as this, bravery is established
when the narrator repeats ‘I refuse you’, as she becomes persistent and more determined in
her comments, irrespective of the man’s feelings. Throughout the poem she rejects the
stereotypical role of a woman assigned to her by society by refusing to be a ‘bondslave’, a
child bearer or a ‘doll to dress and sit for feeble worship’. Women in this society were often
seen as servants, mothers or goddesses only to be looked at but not touched.
Similarly up to a point, Katherine Phillips in ‘A Married State’ states that women in
relationships must put effort into pleasing their husbands, denying their own personalities in
the process. She claims ‘the best of husbands are so hard to please’. Phillips advises the
reader to stay away from relationships as women in relationships live an unavoidable life of
‘hard’ tasks, the main one being to obediently ‘please’ their husbands by performing their
every demand. As a result of obedient behaviour, the woman becomes a slave to the man
in a relationship.
‘Cousin Kate’ and ‘A Married State’ only speak of male dominance because it was part of the
respected status quo of their era in society, although Phillips refuses to have anything to do
with it. However, Juliet and Christina Walsh do not seem care about being dangerously
controversial by breaking the rules.
In contrast to Katherine Phillips who acts responsibly wishing to lay down the rules for a
good relationship before entering into it, Romeo and Juliet’s relationship continues with
irresponsible hastiness which is emphasised by Romeo highlighting the immense risks he
takes to see Juliet: ‘With love’s light wings did I o’er perch these walls’. Just after Romeo and
Juliet’s first meeting, Romeo is already risking his life to see Juliet by breaking into the
territory of his sworn enemies, the Capulets. Despite being warned by mature Juliet that
‘they will murder thee’ if he is caught, Romeo’s devoted love and obsession with Juliet has
developed so much in such a short time that it gives him the courage to risk his life, blinded
by love of the consequences. Moreover, the personification of ‘love’s light wings’ gives the
impression that Romeo is oblivious of danger when thinking of Juliet because his extremely
optimistic mind is in a daydream of ‘love’. However, this warns the audience that if Romeo’s
love for Juliet develops quickly, then the whole relationship could be hasty, resulting in the
relationship coming to an early and abrupt end which foreshadows its inevitable destiny. As
the Friar says: ‘ They stumble that run fast’.
Phillips in ‘A Married State’ does not ‘run fast’ but acts responsibly by identifying some of the
benefits of avoiding marriage for women: ‘No blustering husbands…no pangs of
childbirth…No children’s cries… to distract your prayers’. The rhyme of ‘fears’ and ‘tears’
followed by ‘offend your ears’ creates an effect of a repetitive, tiring life full of pain and
suffering. However, beginning each line with ‘No’ makes the reader feel relieved and lucky
to be single. Phillips does not accept the belief that frightened 17th century single women into
marriage which suggested they would go to hell if they were in not in a married relationship.
As a result of listing only the negatives of marriage, this structure creates negative views on
relationships as it bombards the reader with all the responsibilities of the tiring chores and
chaos that relationships bring, mostly the result of interfering children. She has the courage
to reject the stereotype.
10
As in Marvell and Christina Walsh’s poems, in ‘Romeo and Juliet’ it is clear that the structure
of‘ Act 2 Scene 2 shows the relationship between Romeo and Juliet as private and mutual.
When the Nurse interrupts Romeo and Juliet’s conversation, this emphasises that the
majority of the scene is structured in such a way that only Romeo and Juliet are present.
Furthermore, this indicates that Romeo and Juliet wanted no interference from others for a
while because they used this particular time to rapidly build the relationship by expressing
their mutual love. The nurse becomes the voice of reason (‘Madam!’), which attempts to end
the inevitable chaos by interrupting the relationship. But Juliet excludes the Nurse from
knowledge of the relationship in this scene, as indicated when Juliet bids ‘adieu!’ to Romeo –
highlighting privacy – then she hastily answers to the nurse – implying Romeo is the priority
of her life.
Like Romeo and Juliet’s relationship which largely develops when they are the only people
on the stage, Andrew Marvell and Christina Walsh promote private relationships with
personal pronouns: ‘tear our pleasures’, ‘our co-equal love’. This highlights the mutual love
and equality in the relationship as the man and woman are equally involved and there is no
mention of anyone who could distract them such as children, parents or a nurse in Juliet’s
case. Furthermore, exclusion of others from knowledge of the relationship implies a lack of
trust in other people, which strengthens the trusted love between a man and a woman in a
private relationship. However, in the case of Marvell’s poem, it is clear that the relationship is
at this particular stage one-sided. He has yet to gain the mutuality obtained by Romeo and
Juliet and unlike them it is left in some doubt at the end of the poem whether he will gain the
woman’s love.
Andrew Marvell supports the view that private relationships are potentially joyful and ‘were
no crime’ whereas the ‘Cousin Kate’ persona and Juliet reject this as private, and more
particularly secret, relationships lead to suffering women. Juliet’s maturity enables her to
realise she will feel the ‘grief’ of loneliness when Romeo leaves her because there is no one
else she can trust and confide in. She comments, after she has asked whether or not Romeo
is serious in his ‘suit’, that if he is not he should ‘leave me to my grief’. This is because no
one can know of the relationship (apart from the trusted Nurse and Friar) because Romeo
and Juliet’s family are enemies. Juliet’s disappointment with Romeo leaving her alone is
suggested by the personal pronoun ‘me’, establishing her personal feelings of sorrow in a
forlorn tone of pity to the reader. Having to be ‘private’ has its penalties.
Juliet’s potential emotional suffering is accentuated by the ‘Cousin Kate’ persona in a forlorn,
regretful tone: ‘So now I moan, an unclean thing/Who might have been a dove.’ Emotional
pain is emphasised by the oxymoron (‘unclean’/’dove’) as it shows just how one relationship
can significantly affect a woman’s life for the worse. In addition, the word ‘might’ve’ shows
how devastatingly close the narrator was to living an average life, if only she had not met the
great lord. As a consequence, hope of a contrastingly content and respectful life is
regretfully lost forever. Her earlier comment about living a ‘shameless shameful life’
reinforces the misogynistic nature of the society where a man could get away with doing
wrong but a woman could not. In the same way, Juliet worries about what it would be like for
her if Romeo ‘mean’st not well’. Her situation as a woman allows little of the ‘comfort’ Romeo
is given by his friends in his unrequited desire for Rosaline. Both she and the narrator of
‘Cousin Kate’ must suffer in silence.
On the other hand, Andrew Marvell suggests private relationships bring joy when there is no
interference from others: ‘Our sweetness…our pleasures’. Furthermore, the reader is told
that the only reason the woman would suffer is if she dies a virgin because ‘then worms
should try that long-preserved virginity’. In addition, this implies that if the woman delays in
the relationship, dying a virgin would be a negative situation because the muddy worms
would caress her body instead of a man. However, Marvell’s world is imaginary. Juliet and
the persona in ‘Cousin Kate’ have to live in a real world where actions have consequences.
To summarise, in Shakespeare’s play ‘Romeo and Juliet’, Romeo and Juliet’s relationship
develops quickly from a platform of mutual affection and attraction to the private world of an
albeit brief married life. Unlike in ‘To his Coy Mistress’ where private relationships potentially
11
bring joy, according to Marvell at least, in ‘Romeo and Juliet’ privacy leads to no trust in
others, escalating to a suffering woman, which is also evident in ‘Cousin Kate’. Despite this,
some relationships in literature spark controversy as they contain non-stereotypical aspects
of their era as women adopt superiority. However, this is unlike the situations in ‘Cousin
Kate’ and ‘A Married State’ as they only question the validity of male domination.
AO1 Band 5 (8-10)
Candidates:
make increasingly assured selection and incorporation of relevant detail;
are able to speculate/offer tentative judgements; are able to evaluate
characters/relationships and attitudes/motives;
at the highest level, consistently handle texts with confidence, have an overview and ability
to move from the specific to the general;
convey ideas persuasively and cogently with apt textual support.
AO2 Band 4 (6-7)
Candidates:
see how different aspects of style and structure combine to create effects;
show increasingly clear appreciation of how meanings and ideas are conveyed through
language, structure and form.
AO3 Band 5 (16-20)
Candidates:
make a sustained discussion of links between texts, confidently evaluating subject, theme,
character and the impact of texts;
make apt selection of details for cross reference and confidently explore writers’ different
ways of expressing meaning and achieving effects;
at the highest level, make subtle points of connection and probe links confidently.
Commentary
AO1 Band 5 (8-10)
This candidate chooses to write a fully integrated essay where five texts are dealt with. The
candidate moves between them with an ease born of a sound grasp of content and meaning.
Selection of detail is appropriate and there is no shortage of speculations and tentative
judgements. The focus is on an examination of the beliefs and motivations of the various
women portrayed. Various aspects are considered including the rejection of stereotypical
roles and the development of the relationships.
Mark 9
AO2 Band 4 (6-7)
While a considerable knowledge of the texts is displayed, the candidate tends to quote
without a great deal of analysis. There is evidence, however, that the candidate has an
understanding of structure and form and how they contribute to meaning.
Mark 7
AO3 Band 5 (16-20)
There is certainly ‘sustained discussion of links between texts’ although the essay structure
could be clearer. Various aspects of the women’s positions and views are linked with some
confidence and there is a mature understanding of the various views presented by the texts
and the connections between them. Details are selected carefully to support the candidate's
points. The ‘writer’s different ways of expressing meaning and achieving effects’, however,
are not investigated to any great extent.
Mark 18
Total 34
12
Sample 3: Consider the parent child relations in ‘Romeo and Juliet’, ‘Catrin’ and ‘A
Frosty Night’. Draw links between them.
In William Shakespeare’s play, ‘Romeo and Juliet’, there are many different relationships
within the family. Juliet has quite a complicated relationship with her parents but the
complication is mainly with her father. At the beginning of the play, Capulet seems loving
and caring until he doesn’t get what he wants. Near enough at the end of the play, we see
his true character. In Shakespeare’s days, to go against what men told women to do was
not acceptable. This is where we empathise with Lord Capulet who can’t understand why
his daughter won’t obey him when she has been obedient for the rest of her life.
In Act 1, Scene 2, Capulet seems loving and caring, asking Paris to let her have more time.
Capulet claims that Juliet is the ‘hopeful lady’ of his earth and that God has taken his other
children. At this point we feel that Capulet is quite close to his daughter but Paris is able to
persuade Capulet to get Juliet to marry him which tells us that Capulet isn’t really thinking
about Juliet and how she might feel. However, Capulet doesn’t completely rush into things.
He invites Paris to a party and tells him to woo Juliet, and to ‘get her heart’. We can see
Capulet loves Juliet but doesn’t really consider her feelings.
In Act 1 Scene 3, we can instantly see that there is not much of a bond between Lady
Capulet and Juliet. We first see this when Lady Capulet asks the Nurse ‘where’s my
daughter?’ We can see also this when Juliet calls her mother, ‘madam’. At one point in the
scene, Lady Capulet insists for the nurse to go while she talks to Juliet, and claims that they
must talk in secret, but almost instantly, she calls her back. This tells us that Lady Capulet
feels uncomfortable and possibly a bit awkward around Juliet. The relationship is not close.
As the Nurse gives her speech, we learn that she was and still is more of a mother figure
than Lady Capulet. The nurse breastfed Juliet and raised her. One time in the scene, we
can see this is when the nurse claims that ‘thou was't the pretties babe that e’er I nursed.’
Juliet is very close to her and has a special bond with the nurse that she doesn’t have with
her mother. Lady Capulet asks lots of questions like ‘Can you love the gentleman?’ and
‘Can you like of Paris’ love?’ which makes the audience believe that she is full concern.
Lady Capulet says in one of her speeches that ‘I was your mother much upon these years.’
This suggests to us that Lady Capulet knows that she hasn’t really been a mother or been
there for Juliet but still thinks that she knows what’s best for her and that girls were expected
to marry young and produce children. We can tell that Juliet is closer to the nurse as she
doesn’t push her into anything that she doesn’t want to do.
In Act 3, scene 5, we immediately see a big change in Lord Capulet. In the beginning of the
scene, Lady Capulet enters Juliet’s bedroom very happy, kind and soft. Lady Capulet breaks
the news to Juliet about her marrying Paris but Juliet doesn’t like it and insists for it not to
happen. We know, of course, that she has already married Romeo. As Capulet enters soon
after, he finds out about Juliet resisting and lashes out straight away. Eventually we see that
Capulet doesn’t care about Juliet as he tells her to hang herself, calls her ‘baggage’, ‘greensickness carrion’ and threatens her by saying he’ll ‘drag her to church on a hurdle.’ This tells
the audience that he doesn’t care whether she dies or if anything happens to her, either way
he wants her married. At this point Lady Capulet is staying as calm as she can. Perhaps
Lady Capulet cares for Juliet deep down but she dare not cross her husband. Capulet
claims that his ‘fingers itch’ which connotes anger, temper and adrenaline. We can see that
Capulet doesn’t bond or love Juliet when he says that they have ‘a curse in having her’, and
even one child is too much. Juliet begs for forgiveness. The nurse is trying to stop him
because all she wants is for Juliet to be safe. As Capulet walks out in anger, Lady Capulet
doesn’t care about Juliet as she claims ‘do as thou wllt for I have done with thee’. Even the
Nurse, who has been like a mother to Juliet turns against her when she tells her to marry
Paris and forget Romeo.
In conclusion, there are lots of good elements of love, care and bonding but there are also
elements of hate, anger and threats. Coming to the end of the play, it is clear that there are
13
lots of different relationships within the Capulet family. When Juliet is found dead, Capulet
regrets the way he treated her because he realises that now he has lost his heir.
Juliet can be seen as selfish but it’s her choice although she is going against the norm. No
matter what Capulet says or does Lady Capulet stands by his side. Both parents are very
unsupportive in the middle part of the play.
There are many poems that discuss ‘mother-daughter relationships but in this essay, I will be
writing about two in particular. The first poem I will be writing about is ‘Catrin’. ‘Catrin’ was
written by a Welsh poet named Gillian Clarke. Clarke lives in the Welsh valleys and has a
daughter named Catrin. Gillian Clarke wrote this poem not just to Catrin but also to other
mothers and daughters. The fact that ‘Catrin’ is only mention once throughout the whole
poem shows this. This poem is written to tell the readers what parenthood is like and what it
feels like when moving apart from the daughter.
Instantly, in the first line, Clarke is talking in the past tense. Clarke also finishes the line with
‘child’. This states the fact that Catrin is still young. She goes on about a ‘hot, white room’
which suggests a labour ward. Clarke also talks about traffic lights. We can see that this
may, mean change in her life as the baby is born as traffic lights change colour.
Later, Clarke repeats the phrase, ‘I can remember you’, which tells the reader that she’s
focusing on the past. Clarke then states ‘our first fierce confrontation’ which we know,
means that when she was giving birth, the moment of separation. It was painful and tiring.
The fact that she says ‘fierce’ shows this. Also in the second stanza, Clarke talks about a
‘red rope of love’. This gives us imagery of the umbilical cord which physically attached the
mother to her daughter. The fact that she says that is red could have a number of meanings
but mostly it shows love and anger.
Clarke then says that she ‘coloured the clean squares, with the wild tender circles Of our
struggle to become Separate’. The ‘wild, tender circles’ represent the contractions that she
was having. The word ‘wild’ tells the reader that they were all over the place, very painful,
and more frequent. As we get the end of the ‘past’, alliteration becomes more frequent. She
also emphasises the ‘t’ in ‘to be two, to be ourselves’. This tells us that she’s about to give
birth. The fact that she says ‘we shouted’ and ‘to be two’ tells us that they we both shouting
and possibly crying to become separate people.
In the next stanza, Clarke talks about the present. Clarke states the phrase ‘glass tank
clouded with feelings’. This may represent an incubator, when she used to watch her
daughter feed her and everything else she couldn’t do for herself as she was not yet
independent, or it could mean that there’s such a big mix of feeling in such a little space.
Clarke says that her daughter’s hair is ‘straight, strong, and long’. This has a range of
meanings. The fact that she says her daughters hair is ‘straight and strong’ could mean that
she is strong willed, independent and grown up. Clarke re-mentions the ‘rope’ and that it’s
‘trailing with love and conflict’ reminding us of the umbilical cord which joined them together
and a representative of the link between them. The oxymoron ‘love and conflict’ tells us that
although there is love in relationship, there is also conflict and fighting.
In conclusion, this poem has a wide range of feelings. In this poem, Clarke has used
enjambment which gives it a bit of a rush and shows that Clarke has a stream of emotions
which flows all throughout the whole poem.
The second poem I will be writing about was written by a wartime poet called Robert Graves.
Although he doesn’t know what its like to have a mother-daughter relationship, he had eight
children so he knows what it’s like to be a parent. ‘A Frosty Night’ is about a mother who is
concerned about her daughter, Alice.
In the first stanza, we can see straight away that the mother is concerned as she asks lots of
questions. Alice replies in the second stanza with ‘mother do not hold me so, let me write my
letter’. This could mean that the mother may be physically holding her or Alice may just want
14
a bit of freedom and a chance to have some independence to do her own thing or it may
mean that the matter is mentally holding her and doesn’t want to lose her. Obviously Alice
has a secret that she’s not going to tell her mother.
The next four stanzas are the conversation between Alice and her mother. Alice doesn’t say
much to her mother’s persistent questions. In the fifth stanza. Alice’s mother says about the
‘birds seemed twittering’. Sometimes birds connotes love, so the mother can see that Alice
is acting different and can see birds twittering and singing. We think she may be in love.
Alice’s mother goes on to talk about snow, stars and lambs ‘soft and thick snow lay, stars
danced in the sky’ gives us imagery of a cold, snowy winters might where the stars are
shining bright. The fact that the mother calls Alice a lamb tells us that Alice is still young and
may still be dependent on other people.
Alice’s mother repeats the question ‘what ails you’, which could mean that she’s worried or
she may seem as if she’s being nosey and maybe even pushy. The mother can see that
Alice is not telling her the truth so she repeats the question.
In the sixth stanza Graves uses an oxymoron - ‘you looked like a ghost or angel’. This tells
us that Alice’s mother can see different expressions coming from Alice as ghosts represent
scared and paleness whereas angels represent heaven and sometimes happiness. Alice’s
mother talks about her looking ‘like a ghost or angel’. The word ‘ghost’ may tell us that Alice
is fading away from her mother. In the first line in the sixth stanza, Graves writes ‘Your feet
were dancing, Alice’. This tells the reader that her mother is watching her and paying
attention to her daughter’s actions. This may also seem as if the mother is overprotective
and if she is spying on her daughter.
In the seventh stanza, Alice’s mother talks about her heart being fire and snow. Fire
represents warmth, love and passion whereas snow suggests coldness in her attitude and
pain of love. Graves also used these words as an oxymoron. This last stanza shows that
the mother may have had experience and with that, can see what her daughter is going
through. In the last line, Graves has written ‘Mother, let me go!’ This could have a double
meaning, emotionally letting her daughter go or physically letting her go as she may be
holding/gripping her.
There are many differences and similarities between the three texts. One similarity is
conflict. Although ‘Catrin’ doesn’t suggest violent conflict, Gillian Clarke talks about her
experience being a struggle and fight to become themselves. In ‘Romeo and Juliet’, the
conflict involves the mother, father and Juliet. Lord Capulet uses violent language towards
his daughter and even gestures/suggestions of physical violence. In ‘A Frosty Night,’ much
of the violence is expressed through the mother and daughter’s attitude. However, some of
the violence may be physical. If this is the case, we see this when Alice says ‘let me go’.
Alice’s mother is the person using the most violence. The conflict here is about Alice not
wanting to reveal her secret to her mother who is worried about her.
Another similarity is control throughout the three texts. In ‘Catrin’, the mother feels as if she
is losing control of her daughter. We see this when Clarke says ‘still I am fighting’ but she
knows that she must let her daughter go. She tells us of a mother’s love which wants to
protect and fights against the daughter’s desire for independence but also knows she can’t
keep her as a child forever. In ‘Romeo and Juliet’, however, Capulet wants to control his
daughter. This was normal for a man to have control over a woman, especially a father. We
see an example of this when Capulet says ‘How now wife! Have you deliver’d to her our
decree’. In ‘A Frosty Night,’ the mother feels as if she has no control over her daughter as
her daughter keeps pushing her away. The daughter wants to keep her new love a secret
and private.
A big difference to bear in mind is the time the texts were written in. ‘Romeo and Juliet’ was
written in Elizabethan times and ‘A Frosty Night’ was written just after the war whereas
‘Catrin’ was written much more recently. From the time ‘Romeo and Juliet’ was written,
there has been a huge change of how parents treat children. It was normal for fathers to be
superior to wives and daughters and have complete control over their life and decisions. This
15
was particularly the case when marriage partners were chosen. As the poems become
more recent, we can see that woman have control over their own life but don’t have much
over their children. However, there is more obvious concern for the children from the parents
in the modern poems. While Lady Capulet follows her husband’s lead and in the end washes
her hands of her wilful daughter, Catrin and Lucy’s mothers are much closer to their
daughters and know that they will need to allow them a freedom not allowed to Juliet. At the
same time, they want to keep the closeness and protect them from the things which may
hurt them. Clarke isn’t keen on letting Catrin ‘skate in the dark, for one more hour’ and
Alice’s mother asks her daughter ‘Who was it said, “I love you”’. Both mothers realise that
their daughters are straining to have an independent life and that they should not try to stop
them but they are still fearful for their safety. Lady Capulet wants to push her daughter into
the more ‘independent’ life of marriage although we would think she is far too young to
handle it. This shows how different parent/child relationships were in Elizabethan times. All
the texts are relevant to the difficult relationship between parents, mostly mothers, and
daughters. Even though Juliet rebels against her parents, in the end she is punished for it
because in Shakespeare’s time people thought that a father had to control his daughter. We
have moved on since that time because now in ‘Catrin’ we see the way the mother knows
she has to let the girl go and in ‘A Frosty Night’ the mother is almost powerless when she
tries to find out what is wrong. Mothers seem to worry more about their daughters now than
they did in Elizabethan times.
AO1 Band 4 (6-7 marks)
Candidates: make more detailed reference to text; discuss thoroughly and increasingly
thoughtfully characters/relationships;
probe the sub-text with increasing confidence; select and evaluate relevant textual details;
understand and demonstrate how writers use ideas, themes and settings to affect the
reader; convey ideas clearly and appropriately.
AO2 Band 4 (6-7 marks)
Candidates: see how different aspects of style and structure combine to create effects;
show increasingly clear appreciation of how meanings and ideas are conveyed through
language, structure and form.
AO3 Band 4 (12-15 marks)
Candidates: make some evaluation of subject, theme, character and the impact of texts;
explore links when considering writers’ different ways of expressing meaning and achieving
effects;
explain the relevance and impact of connections between texts.
Commentary
AO1 Band 4 (6-7 marks)
There is some detailed reference to the texts and relationships are investigated. Textual
details are fairly carefully chosen though interpretations are not always certain. Knowledge
of the texts is most assured, however. Ideas are conveyed clearly and there is some
understanding of how the writers convey and use their ideas.
Mark 6
AO2 Band 4 (6-7 marks)
The candidate has some grasp of how different aspects of structure create effects and there
is some investigation of textual references with the occasional alternative interpretation. This
aspect is stronger in the work on poetry.
Mark 6
AO3 Band 4 (12-15 marks)
Links are explored and there is some consideration of the impact and relevance of
connections between the texts. The response is less secure on the ‘writers’ different ways of
expressing meaning’ but clear links are made in a thoughtful fashion and there is a good
understanding of the ‘relevance and impact of connections between texts’.
Mark 12
Total 24
16
Sample 4: Explore Shakespeare’s presentation of love in Act 1 and Act 2 scene 2 in
‘Romeo and Juliet’ and link it with the way love is presented in selected poems.
Shakespeare presents love in many different ways. There are four different types of love
that Shakespeare presents and they are; real love, idealistic love, eternal love and
superficial love. Real love is love that is real and not when they are marrying for money.
Idealistic love is love that isn’t actual real love and that they are marrying for the money or
for fame. Eternal love is love that lasts forever and superficial love is love that is on the
surface. Romeo and Juliet’s love started as shallow love but then turned into deep love as it
went on through the story.
The first time we see Romeo is in Act 1 scene 1 when Romeo loves Rosaline, but Rosaline
doesn’t love Romeo back. We see this in the line “Out of her favour, where I am in love.”
Romeo is sad about this because he is not getting any love in return for the love that he is
giving. Shakespeare uses oxymorons as the phrase contradicts itself. “Why then, o
brawling love, o loving hate” Shakespeare is using a negative word and a positive word
together. Romeo continues his obsession with Rosaline in the line “A right good marksman!
And she’s fair I love” Romeo finds Rosaline very beautiful and that he thinks he has the right
woman for himself and to be with. Benvolio thinks that Romeo is getting too caught up with
Rosaline because Benvolio knows that Rosaline will not be with Romeo so he wants him to
forget about her and move on “Be ruled by me, forget to think of her” but Romeo has no idea
how to forget about her “O, teach me how I should forget to think.” Romeo still thinks that he
should be with her. But Benvolio knows that won’t happen because Rosaline doesn’t want
to be with him.
The first time we hear about Juliet is when her mother is trying to get her to marry Paris. This
is in Act 1 scene 3, but the Juliet’s father thinks that she is too young to marry. Juliet will
marry Paris because she is obedient to her parents’ wishes. Juliet has a boundary for the
love that she will give Paris. “But no more deep will I endart mine eye, than your consent
gives me strength to make it fly.” Juliet doesn’t want to go over the boundary of love that her
parents give her consent for. She will not let it happen. In the next line Juliet is saying that
she will try to like him but only the parts of him that are likeable. “I’ll look to like if looking
liking move.” This shows that Juliet will give it a try and to like Paris as much as she can, up
until the boundary of her parents’ consent.
Act 1 scene 5 is the first time that Juliet and Romeo meet. This scene is a scene with love
and hate in it. When Romeo first sees Juliet he knows that she is better than Rosaline and
that she is the woman who he wants to be with. Romeo then forgets about Rosaline and
concentrates on Juliet. The first time that Romeo sees Juliet is when she is dancing with
Paris. “What lady is that which doth enrich the hand, of yonder knight?” Romeo is saying
whoever is with her, that he is a lucky person and that Juliet is so beautiful. Romeo then
carries on saying “Oh, she doth teach the torches to burn bright.” Romeo is saying that she
is brighter than a burning torch as she is the one who teaches them to burn bright. Romeo is
also saying that she shines brighter than anything. We see this in the line: “it seems she
hangs upon the cheek of night, like a rich jewel in an Ethiopian’s ear”. In this sentence
Shakespeare uses similes for description. They are also saying that as during the night it is
dark, they are referring the darkness of night as a cheek with something bright hanging
beside it. The line “Did my heart love till now? Forswear it, sight! For I ne’er saw true
beauty till this night” is saying that his eyes were liars and that he had never seen true
beauty until tonight and that not even Rosaline was so beautiful. Shakespeare is saying that
nothing was beautiful until tonight. “Sin from thy lips? O trespass sweetly urged! Give me
my sin again” Romeo is saying that because Juliet took a kiss or sin from him that he wants
her to give it back.
Act 2 Scene 2 is when there is boundless love shown and that plans are made for Romeo
and Juliet’s future to be together. In one of the first lines in the scene Romeo is trying to find
Juliet as she has gone to her room. “It is the east, and Juliet is the sun. Arise, fair sun, and
kill the envious moon” These two lines are saying that as the sun rises in the east in the
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mornings the sun is very bright and as there is a light in the room Romeo is wanting Juliet to
rise into his sight so they can be together. It is also saying that as Juliet is the sun, he wants
to kill the moon; the moon is himself and his sadness, because Rosaline will not be with him.
When Romeo sees Juliet he doesn’t speak to her, so Juliet doesn’t know that she is being
overheard when she says the line: “O Romeo, O Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?” This
is saying that after when they last met they want to see each other again. Shakespeare
repeats the name to make sure that the readers know that she is only thinking about one
person and that that is Romeo. Juliet is wanting to get rid of Romeo’s last name in the lines
“Romeo, doff thy name, and for that name, which is no part of thee Take all myself.” This is
because they are then able to be together, if Romeo doesn’t have his last name of
Montague, in exchange he can have Juliet all for himself instead. Juliet is also saying that
the name has nothing to do with him as he is nothing like his family who are rivals with them.
Juliet didn’t know that she was being overheard. when she first knew she was being
overheard, she said “what man art thou that, thus bescreened in night, so stumblest on my
counsel?” Juliet also didn’t like the fact that she was being overheard because of what she
said about Romeo and her feelings about Romeo. Romeo and Juliet have completed their
arrangements to meet in the morning; we know this by the line “I will not fail, ‘tis twenty year
till them” Juliet is saying that she will do anything to be there so that Romeo and herself
could be together, Juliet is also saying that it is such a long time till then, that it is twenty
years when it us only one night.
The last scene that I am going to talk about is in Act 5 scene 3 when Romeo and Juliet die.
This scene shows eternal love which is love that survives death and way beyond and that
even though they are dead the love survives. The line “Beauty’s ensign yet is crimson in thy
lips and in thy cheeks” is showing that even though she is dead, she is still as beautiful as
when she was alive, and that she still has the colour that she would normally in her cheeks
and lips. It also shows that even though she is dead Romeo still sees her beauty.
I am going to explore the presentation of love in sonnet 43 by Elizabeth Barrett Browning.
Barrett Browning is a religious and elaborate person who can be idealistic. With the opening
line Barrett Browning asks a rhetorical question “How do I love thee? Let me count the
ways”. This is saying that there is full love and that there are many different ways for Barrett
Browning to love.
In the next line Barrett Browning uses three words which all give emphasis on love. “I love
thee to the depth and breadth and height.” The three words that Barrett Browning gives
emphasis to are “Depth, Breadth and height.” Nearer the end of the poem there is another
line where Barrett Browning uses three words for emphasis and that is the line “I love thee
with the breath,/Smiles, tears, of all my life!” The other three words are “Breath, Smile and
tears.” These words are all in common with a person as a person breaths, smiles and does
give off tears if they cry. Barrett Browning is also saying that she lives him with all of her life.
The line “I love thee freely” is saying that there are no restrictions on her love and that will go
on for a long time, as there are no restrictions on Barrett Browning’s love for him. Barrett
Browning is also saying that her love for him is good and true love and that she isn’t in love
with him just because of the fame or money which is fake love. The love that she has for
him is also moral love.
The next lines I am going to talk about are the lines “In my old griefs, and with my
childhood’s faith/ I love thee with a love I seemed to lose.” This line is showing that her old
angers and sadness from her childhood in the past have now turned into love. Barrett
Browning is also saying that she loves with the love that she thought she had lost.
The last line that I am going to talk about is the line “I shall but love thee better after death.”
This is the last line in the sonnet and this line is saying that they will love till after death, and
that their love will be better after death.
Another poem that explores the love is ‘Sonnet 130’ by William Shakespeare. ‘Sonnet 130’ is
a negative poem about a woman who is the complete opposite of a beautiful woman to the
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writer Shakespeare. The first line I am going to talk to you about is the opening line, which is
“My mistress’ eyes are nothing like the sun.” This is a negative opening line which is not a
normal opening line as many sonnets have a positive opening line. Shakespeare is also
saying that her eyes are so dull that they are nothing like the sun which is bright, glowing
and shining.
My next line that I am going to talk to you about is the line “if snow is white, why then her
breasts are dun” I have chosen to quote this line because many people when this sonnet
was written were not spending a long time outside. The people who spent a long time
outside were the maids. So this means that many people were in palaces, as they didn’t get
much sun.
My penultimate quotation that I am going to talk to you about is from the line “I have seen
roses damask’d, red and white / but no such roses see I in her cheeks.” This line is saying
that he has seen roses that are red and white but there is no such colour of roses in her
cheeks.
The last line that I am going to talk to you about is the line “I love to hear her speak, yet well I
know / that music hath a far more pleasing sound.” This quotation is saying that even though
Shakespeare loves hearing the woman speak she doesn’t have a very nice speaking sound
to her voice and that music has a much more pleasing sound.
With these quotations I can see that the sonnet 130 by William Shakespeare is a much more
negative sonnet compared to sonnet 43 by Elizabeth Barrrett Browning whose sonnet has a
much more positive attitude.
My first comparison that I am going to make is ‘Sonnet 130’ and ‘Romeo and Juliet’. The
line from the sonnet is “I have seen roses damask’d, red and white, but no such roses see in
her cheeks”. The line from Romeo and Juliet is “Beauty’s ensign, yet, is crimson in thy lips
and in thy cheeks.” The comparison of these lines is that in the sonnet Shakespeare is
saying that the woman is not like other beautiful women as her skin is not the right colour,
but in ‘Romeo and Juliet’ Shakespeare is saying that even though she is dead she still has
the colour crimson in her lips and cheeks and looks alive. These two lines are the opposite
as that the line from ‘Sonnet 130’ is very negative about the woman’s beauty while the line
from ‘Romeo and Juliet’ is very positive even though Juliet seems to be dead.
My second comparison that I am going to make is between the ‘Sonnet 43’ and ‘Romeo and
Juliet’. I am going to compare the line 2: “I love thee to the level of every day’s / Most quiet
need, by sun and candlelight” from ‘Sonnet 43’ to the line “It is the east, and Juliet is the sun,
/ arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon” from ‘Romeo and Juliet’ Act 2 scene 2. The
comparison between these two lines is that they are both involving the sun which is one of
the brightest things. In ‘Sonnet 43’ she is saying that she loves and needs the man as much
as she needs sunlight. We need sunlight to live and so this emphasises the importance of
her partner. In ‘Romeo and Juliet’ they are saying that Juliet is the sun and that she is killing
the moon, which represents his sadness because Rosaline rejected him. Juliet as the sun is
putting the ‘envious moon’ out of his mind. They are also saying for both, ‘Romeo and Juliet’
and ‘Sonnet 43’ that the sun is rising to help. In the ‘Sonnet 43’ the sun is being used to help
and that the sun in ‘Romeo and Juliet’ is rising to help Romeo forget his sadness. In both
quotations the writers are saying that the lovers need the loved one as much as they need
the sun and they are beautiful like the sun.
Another link is that in ‘Sonnet 130’ the writer is very critical and nasty about his mistress
because he describes her in an unpleasant way but in ‘Romeo and Juliet’ Romeo does
nothing but praise the beauty of Juliet. He can’t live without her and that’s why he kills
himself at the end of the play because he thinks she is dead. In Barrett Browning’s Sonnet,
she is like Romeo because she says that her love fills all the parts of her life. Also Romeo
and Juliet and the woman in the sonnet think that their love will go on after death.
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Real love is seen in Romeo and Juliet’s love for each other and Sonnet 43, idealistic and
superficial love is seen in Romeo’s love for Rosaline which was never going to work out and
eternal love is seen in ‘Sonnet 43’ and ‘Romeo and Juliet’.
AO1 Band 3 (4-5 marks)
Candidates: display some understanding of main features;
make generalised reference to relevant aspects of the text, echoing and paraphrasing;
begin to select relevant detail.
AO2 Band 3 (4-5 marks)
Candidates:
are able to recognise and make simple comments on particular features of style and
structure.
AO3 Band 3 (8-11marks)
Candidates: make straightforward links and connections between texts;
begin to make simple comments on some of the different ways writers express meaning;
select some obvious features of similarity and difference.
Commentary
AO1 Band 3 (4-5 marks)
This candidate has a reasonable if basic understanding of the play. The candidate starts in
quite a detailed fashion though this standard of examination does not continue through the
entire essay. Romeo’s infatuation with Rosaline is dealt with before consideration of the first
meeting of the lovers and Juliet’s situation. There is some echoing and paraphrasing and at
the times the essay becomes a little repetitive. However, relevant detail is selected. The
understanding of the poems is less secure (especially in the work on Shakespeare’s ‘Sonnet
130’) and here there is some confusion and rather empty commentary.
Mark 5
AO2 Band 3 (4-5 marks)
There are occasions when the candidate investigates the nature of the language choices
though as noted above, paraphrases and echoing are fairly common. There is no shortage
of textual references, however, and ‘simple comments’ are made.
Mark 5
AO3 Band 3 (8-11marks)
Straightforward links are made in a fairly ordered way with some reference to the texts. They
are limited in range but simple comments are made about the way different writers express
meaning.
Mark 10
Total mark 20
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Sample 5: Examine the way that Shakespeare presents the relationship between Juliet
and her parents. Link your thoughts to parental relationships in the poems.
In this essay I will look at parent/child relationships that are portrayed from different
perspectives and consider how complex the relationships can be.
At the start of ‘Romeo and Juliet’, Juliet is a typical girl for her time and position in society,
she is dutiful, obedient, sheltered and shy; however by the end of the play she has become
very independent and confident, and shows this with the decisions she has to make. We are
aware from the Prologue that Juliet and Romeo die because of their families’ feud towards
each other. Also the themes of fate, love, hate and tragedy are introduced making us aware
that the tragic deaths of the children are inevitable even though the “Star-crossed lovers take
their life”. We are also told that as a result of their deaths they bring about peace to Verona.
In Act 1 scene 2 Capulet and Paris talk about Paris marrying Juliet, Capulet explains to Paris
how he thinks that Juliet is too young to be married and that a two year wait would be
advised. This is quite weird and different for Shakespearean time as Capulet is giving Juliet
the freedom to choose whether or not she wants to marry Paris as girls at that time are
usually forced into a marriage. It is obvious from Capulet’s language that he thinks highly of
Juliet and speaks in a loving way.
“She is the hopeful lady of my earth.
But woo her, gentle Paris, get her heart –
My will to her consent is but a part.”
The rhyming couplets make his remarks sound poetic and represent his love for his
daughter. “The hopeful lady of my earth” tells us that Capulet doesn’t want anything to go
wrong for Juliet and is trying to make sure she is happy. Giving Juliet time before she has to
make the decision shows how considerate he is being for Juliet. This is also surprising
because it contrasts with the patriarch we see earlier who is caught up in the long-standing
feud.
In Act 1 scene 3 Lady Capulet introduces the subject of marriage to Juliet, but also
summons the Nurse to be present. This shows us that she is aware that Juliet and the Nurse
have a stronger relationship than herself and Juliet, we are also made aware that it was the
Nurse who breast fed Juliet as a baby. The way Juliet addresses her mother as Madam
shows how little and how formal their relationship is. The fact that Lady Capulet has to ask
Juliet “How stands your dispositions to be married?” shows us how little they talk and how
little Lady Capulet knows Juliet. This would be typical of a mother – daughter relationship
with their social status because Nurses were employed to look after the children. Juliet’s
response “It is an honour that I dream not of”. Shows that she is very sheltered and naive
where at her age she is expected to be married. Juliet’s promise “I’ll look to like, if looking
liking move”. Suggests that Juliet wants to be independent and doesn’t feel the pressure to
get married any time soon, this also shows how obedient and dutiful she is towards her
parents.
In Act 3 scene 4 Capulet unexpectedly allows the marriage to Paris to go ahead in two days
time and has no doubt Juliet will obey his wish. Paris is the most eligible bachelor who is
also a relation to Prince Escalus, so a bond between him and the Prince would be
advantageous in the feud against Montague. It provides status, wealth and stability not only
for Juliet but her father too. Capulet changes his mind because of Tybalt’s death which he
believes Juliet is grieving over and feels that a wedding would lighten the mood for
everyone. This is surprising to us because of the consideration he has shown for Juliet up to
this point, it reminds us how powerless women were back then. He expects Juliet to obey his
wish to marry Paris.
“I will make a desperate tender
of my child’s love. I think she will be ruled
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in all respects by me.....I doubt it not.”
In Act 3 scene 5 Lady Capulet arrives in Juliet’s bedroom as Romeo is leaving, to tell her
about the marriage. She begs her mother to stop the wedding and her mother says she’s
ungrateful because she believes Paris to be a good catch for Juliet and the family it will give
them more respectability and status, which she thinks is very important. This scene shows
Juliet becoming more independent, braver and more mature after deciding to marry Romeo.
This insults Lady Capulet as she had an arranged marriage at Juliet’s age and doesn’t
understand why Juliet would not want this also, this implants the thought in Lady Capulet’s
head that Juliet thinks that people who have arranged marriages are wrong and bad and this
insults her. “I wish she were dead.”
Then Lord Capulet enters, firstly misunderstanding Juliet’s tears of grief but then she defies
him, he becomes angry, abusive and threatening. Capulet talks about how Juliet may be too
good for them, how she is worthless but has still been able to be found a husband.
“How? Will she none? Doth she not give us thanks?
Is she not proud? Doth she not count her blest,
Unworthy as she is, that we have wrought
So worthy gentleman to be her bride?”
Juliet is rejecting her father’s decision to marry Paris, which he partly did to help get the
family over the death of Tybalt and also so he could get close to the prince. Neither parent
listens to Juliet and ignore her wishes to marry Paris this is quite common for girl of her age
at this time, and is not treated as if she their daughter.
In Act 4 scene 5 the Capulet’s reaction to Juliet’s death. It is a touching scene because we
see their grief and obvious devastation of the ‘reality’ on them. Lady Capulet’s reaction to the
news “Alack the day, she’s dead, she’s dead, she’s dead!” The fact that she repeats what
The Nurse says “Alack the day” shows that she’s incapable of thinking clearly and the
repetition “She’s dead” shows the disbelief of the situation. Capulet’s reaction is similar
“O child, o child! My soul, and not my child!
Dead art thou. Alack, my child is dead.
And with my child my joys are buried.”
The repetition “O child” shows Capulet trying to understand and absorb the information, “And
with my child my joys are buried.” Shows how devastated Capulet is about Juliet’s death and
how he will never be happy again. These two quotes show how sad the Capulets are that
their last child is dead. Shakespeare uses dramatic irony because we are aware she is not
really dead, but it is touching to see the parent’s reaction and to see actual grief from her
parents.
The relationship between Juliet and her parents changes a lot throughout the play, at the
beginning she is obedient towards her parents. Her father gives Juliet the freedom to decide
whether or not she wants to marry Paris. But when Juliet meets Romeo she matures quickly
and wants to become independent. Her decision to marry Romeo helps her realise that she
needs to distance herself from her parents so nothing bad will happen to them or their
relationship. However it is the control that Lord Capulet has as a father that makes her
choose to fake her death which, in turn, results in the suicide of the two children.
The poem ‘Catrin’ by Gillian Clarke is about her relationship with her daughter Catrin. It has
two verses the first looks back at her memories at birth and the second takes place in the
present. Clarke’s memory of her daughter begins before her birth “I can remember you / As I
stood in a hot, white / room...” This makes the reader aware of the impact the birth of her
daughter had on her, how the anticipation of the event was obviously special and
memorable, as you’d expect. The pronouns “I” and “You” make it a very personal account as
it seems as if she is speaking directly to Catrin.
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Clarke describes her daughter’s birth as being like a battle. “Our first / Fierce confrontation...”
The alliteration used, ‘F’, conveys her strong feelings as if she’s fought with the labour pain
as she’s given birth to Catrin. It makes it clear to the audience how different labour is to what
is expected.
Clarke uses an interesting image to describe the umbilical cord which bonds mother and
child “Red rope of love...” Clarke’s use of a metaphor represents the umbilical cord where
the mother and child were together. It is the birth that’s going to allow them to become
separate individuals. The colour symbolises the love and powerful emotions that Clarke is
feeling.
Ultimately, neither mother nor child wins the battle of birth; but both are changed forever.
“Neither won nor lost the struggle
In the glass tank clouded with feelings
Which changed us both. Still I am fighting
You off...”
Using the hyperbolic metaphor “Still I am fighting” Clarke creates the image of how difficult it
is for her to keep a strong relationship with her child. This is significant because it shows
how parent child relationships are. Clarke’s daughter constantly tugs at the bond which
united them when she was born “bringing up / From the heart’s pool that old rope...” The use
of this metaphor again described as “old” emphasises that the parent child bond has existed
for centuries. The message that Clarke is trying to convey is that this is not specific to her
relationship and this is why her daughter’s name is never said. The oxymoron “Trailing love
and conflict” expresses the two powerful emotions that they feel for each other and is what
make the relationship difficult.
The request to skate for another hour in the dark seems harmless “As you ask may you
skate / In the dark, for one more hour.” But Catrin wants to be separated from the safety of
her parents and experience something dangerous. However, Clarke cannot give in because
she knows if she does that she will be losing her child.
The poem “Follower” by Seamus Heaney is about himself as a child following his father
around who is a farmer, and how Seamus as a child wants to grow up to be like his father.
But in the end it is his father who is following him.
During the first three stanzas the poet recalls his father working in the fields and shows his
affection and admiration he has for his father’s skills. “An expert. He would set the wing”, “An
expert” show the admiration he feels for his father. Additionally Seamus uses the word
“globed” to describe his father as a very strong, dependable and powerful man. Throughout
the poem there are indications towards his father using the skills of a sailor, being as a ship,
making steady progress for example, “rolled over without breaking” sounds like a ship in the
waves. “mapping” sound like role of a sailor. “Dipping and rising” and “full sail strong” also
sounds like a ship at sea. This metaphor shows the natural movement of his father on land
and how skilled he is at his job.
The last three stanza talk about how Heaney wanted to be like his father
“I stumbled in hob-nailed wake... / All I ever did was follow / In his broad shadow round the
farm.” This shows how close the father son relationship is. In the last stanza the roles are
switched as it his father who is now “stumbling” “behind” and just like Heaney “was nuisance,
tripping, falling, / Yapping...” This shows the reader how he sees his father as his father saw
him. The poem is lively and positive at the beginning when Heaney reminisces about his
childhood, but as it gets towards the present day, the poem starts to get more negative and
darker. The words “will not go away” gives the reader the impression that Heaney feels that
this is a burden.
In conclusion, Shakespeare shows the contemporary parent/child relationship which was
traditionally one-sided because of the patriarchal society of his time. Gillian Clark’s “Catrin”
shows a one-sided mother and daughter relationship where she talks about the birth and the
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adulthood which is a constant battle with her daughter. Seamus Heaney’s “Follower”, which
is also autobiographical, is told from the child’s perspective, it highlights the role reversal in
the parent/child relationship.
All three texts show different ways that parents can bring up children but they have different
perspectives. Shakespeare sees the relationship objectively while Heaney sees it as a son
looking at his father and Clarke sees it as a mother looking at her daughter. This means that
they all see different things about the relationships which makes the texts interesting.
AO1 Band 4 (6-7)
Candidates: make more detailed reference to text; discuss thoroughly and increasingly
thoughtfully characters/relationships;
probe the sub-text with increasing confidence; select and evaluate relevant textual details;
understand and demonstrate how writers use ideas, themes and settings to affect the
reader; convey ideas clearly and appropriately.
AO2 Band 5 (8-10)
Candidates:
show appreciation of how writers use language to achieve specific effects;
make assured exploration and evaluation of the ways meaning, ideas and feeling are
conveyed through language, structure and form;
at the highest level, make assured analysis of stylistic features.
AO3 Band 2 (4-7)
Candidates:
begin to make simple links when required;
give simple unfocused comments on writers’ ideas.
Commentary:
AO1 Band 4 (6-7 marks)
This candidate has a good understanding of the texts and incorporates appropriate detail.
The ideas are conveyed clearly. The candidate is able to evaluate characters and their
relationships, offering mature and sensible opinions.
Mark 7
AO2 Band 5 (8-10)
There is some work done on the language of the texts, particularly in the poetry section, and
the chosen quotations are apt. There is also a respectable understanding and consideration
of the texts’ structures.
Mark 8
AO3 Band 2 (4-7)
In this section, the candidate simply repeats point made earlier in the essay and makes only
a limited effort to link texts. This dramatically reduces the mark for this AO and thus the mark
for the whole piece, which generally is of good quality, is low.
Mark 4
Total mark 19.
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Sample 6: Consider the relationship between Macbeth and Lady Macbeth and link it to
poems from the selection.
In Act 1 scene 5 Lady Macbeth is reading the letter from Macbeth. This suggests they have
a good relationship because they are happy together. That shows their relationship is good.
This shows that Lady Macbeth and Macbeth are writing each other letters, which means that
their relationship is good.
In Act 1 scene 5 Lady Macbeth starts talking to the devil because she thinks Macbeth is not
man enough to kill the King. This suggests that Macbeth and Lady Macbeth’s relationship is
turning bad because Lady Macbeth doesn’t trust Macbeth. This shows that Lady Macbeth
doesn’t trust Macbeth to kill the king so she wants to become a man “unsex me here”.
In Act 1 scene 5 Lady Macbeth plans on killing the king. This suggests that Lady Macbeth is
in control of their relationship and she’s in control of Macbeth. This shows that Lady Macbeth
is in control of their relationship. This suggests that Lady Macbeth’s relationship has got very
bad because Lady Macbeth wants Macbeth to kill the king. This shows that Lady Macbeth
would do everything for Macbeth “dash the brain out if sworn”.
In Act 1 Lady Macbeth wants Macbeth to kill the king but Macbeth doesn’t want to. This
suggest that Macbeth isn’t listening to Lady Macbeth which means that their relationship has
got absolutely terrible because they don’t talk to each other.
In Act 2 scene 2 Lady Macbeth treats Macbeth like a child. This shows that Lady Macbeth
and Macbeth’s relationship has gone so bad that Lady Macbeth treats Macbeth like he’s a
child. This shows that Lady Macbeth treats Macbeth like a child. This shows that Lady
Macbeth and Macbeth’s relationship gets worse in Act 1 because Macbeth and Lady
Macbeth don’t trust each other.
In ‘Human Interest’ the theme is love. This is shown in “I loved her.” The speaker makes
the poem sound interesting because he had made it sound angry and bitter as the setting is
in Prison. This is shown in “Banged up inside” for killing his girlfriend. In Stanzas 1 and 2
the man showed anger and bitterness. This shows “She met some prick after work”. This
mean he didn’t like the man for taking his girl friend. In Stanza 3 and 4 the man had
happiness and passion. This is shown when he says “when I think about her now I near
choke with grief.” That shows that he loved her more than anyone else. The similar bits are
that the both poems talk about love. This shows that both men had love for their girlfriends.
The difference between ‘Human interest’ and ‘My Last Duchess’ is that one man loves his
girlfriend and the other man doesn’t.
In ‘Macbeth’ the theme is Death because Lady Macbeth wants Macbeth to kill the king so
that she can become the queen. In ‘Human interest’ the theme is also death because he was
jealous and angry because his girlfriend was cheating with another man.
In ‘Macbeth’ there's lots of death and violence because Macbeth kills his best friend and the
King because he want to become king. In ‘Human Interest’ there is also death and violence
because he kills his girlfriend just because she was seen with another man.
In ‘Macbeth’ jealousy is a big part because Macbeth killed the king because he was jealous
and he wanted to become king. In ‘Human Interest’ the Speaker is jealous of his girlfriend
because she was cheating on another man, which made him jealous.
In ‘Macbeth’ and ‘Human Interest’ they are similar because they both have death, pain and
suffering. The difference is that Macbeth killed a king and his best friend just so he could
become king. The difference is in ‘Human Interest’ he was bitter angry and upset.
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In ‘Macbeth’ the relationship is intense because Macbeth and Lady Macbeth don’t listen to
each other. In ‘Human Interest’ the relationship is also intense because the girl friend cheat
on her boy friend as she tries to lie to him so he kills her.
I like ‘Macbeth’ because it is good. I don’t like ‘Macbeth’ because the language is too hard to
understand and hard to read. I like ‘Human Interest’ because it’s a good poem but bits of it I
don’t understand because it doesn’t have much details and it is hard.
AO1 Band 3 (4-5 marks)
Candidates:
display some understanding of main features;
make generalised reference to relevant aspects of the text, echoing and paraphrasing;
begin to select relevant detail.
AO2 Band 2 (2-3 marks)
Candidates:
may make generalised comments about stylistic effects.
AO3 Band 2 (4-7 marks)
Candidates:
begin to make simple links when required;
give simple unfocused comments on writers’ ideas.
Commentary
AO1 Band 3 (4-5 marks)
The candidate has some understanding of the main features of the texts though the
development of the play protagonists’ relationship could be fuller and some key aspects are
missed. In addition, the approach is a little muddled and repetitive. In the work on the
poems, the candidate makes ‘generalised reference to relevant aspects of the text’ though
the work is limited.
Mark 4
AO2 Band 2 (2-3 marks)
Concentration on this aspect is very limited indeed. The candidate does quote relevant lines
but does little to elaborate on the stylistic aspects.
Mark 2
AO3 Band 2 (4-7 marks)
There is a real effort to cover this AO and a number of links are suggested though none is
developed or considered in any depth. The candidate has made ‘unfocused comments on
the writers’ ideas’.
Mark 6
Total Mark 12.
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Sample 7: How does Romeo and Juliet’s relationship change after their first meeting?
Link with suitable poems.
In ‘Romeo and Juliet’ their relationship changes after they meet each other for the first time.
Romeo and Juliet realise that they cannot be together because their families are arguing.
“Tis my name that is my enemy. O be some other name”. Juliet is saying the only thing
between them is Romeo’s last name.
Romeo and Juliet realise that their family feud just doesn’t matter and they want to be
together no matter what. They agree to marry each other as Romeo says “if that the best of
love be honourable, thy purpose marriage. Send me word tomorrow”. They are planning on
getting married even when their families hate each other. This shows that after their first
meet their relationship is strong.
Romeo asks Friar to marry him and Juliet “That thou consent to marry us today”. Romeo
and Juliet are almost married and Friar knows about it.
Romeo tells the Nurse to try and make Juliet come and get married “Bid her devise some
means to come to shrift and there she shall be married”. Romeo and Juliet are about to get
married and try and settle their family feud. Friar tells Romeo and Juliet not to stay alone
until they get married “you shall not stay alone till holy church incorporates two in one”. It
seems like they don’t care if their families find out about them. Friar tells Romeo he will be
banished “Ha, banishment. Be merciful, say death”.
Juliet’s parents tell Juliet to either turn up and the church on Thursday to marry Paris or she
will be out of the family “get thee to church O’ Thursday”. Juliet knows if she marries Romeo
she is out of the family. But she does it anyway because she loves him so much and this
shows that the relationship means more to her than family.
Juliet says that she wants to die to the Friar. Friar suggests that Juliet drinks a potion “this
shall take thee from this present shame” to avoid marring Paris. Juliet drinks the potion that
will make her sleep “Romeo, I come! This do I drink to thee”. Juliet is pretending to have
poisoned herself. When Juliet wakes up seeing Romeo has killed himself and Romeo drunk
all the poison “Drunk all and left no friendly drop to help me after”. Juliet kills herself because
she can’t be without Romeo.
The poems we have been studying are all about relationships. In the poem ‘A Married State’
the poem shows that marriage is not easy. The relationships are all bad and the husband in
the poem is no good and hurts the feelings of the woman in the poem. The woman tells the
reader that it is not a good idea to get married and this links to the title.
In ‘Sonnet 130’ Shakespeare shows that love is really positive and that it brings two people
together. It is a very romantic poem and it shows that the relationship between two people in
love is very good. Shakespeare shows that two people can stay together and they can get
over things that are hard but in the play the lovers do stay together and die.
The poem Sonnet 130 is like ‘Romeo and Juliet’ because it presents a good view of
relationships and the people like each other. Romeo and Juliet are in love and they have a
strong relationship.
The relationship between the nurse and Juliet is good. This is like it is in ‘Sonnet 130’. In the
poem ‘A Married State’ the whole poem is about the bad side of relationships between a
man and a woman and the children. The writer of this poem is opposite to what the other
writers are saying because she doesn’t think there is love in a marriage.
AO1 Band 2 (2-3)
Candidates:
rely on a narrative approach with some misreadings;
make a personal response to the text.
AO2 Band 2 (2-3)
Candidates:
may make generalised comments about stylistic effects.
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AO3 Band 2 (4-7)
Candidates:
begin to make simple links when required;
give simple unfocused comments on writers’ ideas.
Commentary
AO1 Band 2 (2-3)
The bulk of the essay is concerned with the plot of the play and includes some confused
chronology though there is the basic knowledge of what happens. Simple personal
responses are made. Work on the poetry is very limited and there is confusion about
content.
Mark 3
AO2 Band 2 (2-3)
Quotations are used but only as props for plot points. Comments about stylistic effects are
extremely limited.
Mark 2
AO3 Band 2 (4-7)
The candidate makes some simple and brief points of connection between the texts. The
comments on the ‘writers’ ideas’ are thin and unfocused.
Mark 4
Total mark 9.
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